Chapter 6 "Something I Deserve"

I only have two wishes before: To be with Zion for a long time and for him to reciprocate my feelings. These were my medicine against his family’s slavery. I had endured a lot, waiting for the day when they can accept me. But all of my hope had disappeared when the police arrested me as the main suspect for killing Zion’s grandfather.  

I can still remember that very day when Zion left me:

“No! That is not true! Please believe me! I did not kill grandpa Sorren!”

The police took me out of the mansion by force. I was crying so hard as I tried to pull myself from their tight clutches. When I looked back and saw Zion staring at me, a newborn strength entered my body, that I succeeded escaping from the two big police standing so close at my sides.

After pushing them away, I pathetically ran towards Zion.

The first thing I did?

I knelt down.

I knelt in front of him and begged.

“Please, Zion. Please believe me. You know how much I love grandpa Sorren, right? So how can I kill him? I can’t do that!”

In this family, there are only Zion and Sorren who always take my side. So I was hoping that despite seeing forged evidence and hearing the lies of the witnesses, Zion will believe that I am innocent. Morever, he knew that I love him, and I treasure people around him too.

‘Zion will believe me. Zion will,’ I said theses again and again, as if chanting a spell. However, as soon as I lifted my gaze, I realized that I was wishing for a fire in the middle of the mountain snow.

The sweet Zion, is now looking at me as if I am a monster whom she wanted to kill.

“My grandpa and I treated you like a family,” he said in throaty voice, and with tears in the corner of his eyes. “Why did you kill grandpa just for money?”

“Z-Zion.”

“I can’t forgive you. I won’t ever forgive you, Harriet. And I hope, you’ll be punished until death.”

Zion was my world. And when he abandoned me, I felt homeless.

Filled with tears, the police dragged me our of the mansion.

I couldn’t believe that he abandoned me after believing at the wrong accusation. Even when I was sentenced for death penalty, Zion never visited me in jail.

I felt betrayed by the only man I love.

That is why, when I went back to the past, I had hard time staring straight to Zion’s eyes.

Yes. Grandpa Sorren is alive and Zion still sees me as his little sister. But that is just for now.

Why should I trust a man who already  abandoned me before?

Is my love for him is enough to forgive him and pretend that nothing happened?

I don’t think I can do that.

The moment I sat down on the electric chair where I will die, I promised myself that I won’t never ever love someone like him. So when I realized that I was given the second chance to live, the first thoughts I had is to revenge and to get my position as the real heir.

‘But to work as Zion’s secretary?! I had to work for him as secretary!’

Deep sigh escaped from my lips while I am staring at the blank space.

Few minutes have passed since I ate breakfast together with the family I loathed and when we heard Chairman’s announcement: that I will start to work as Zion’s secretary tomorrow.

‘That will be a problem.’

I remembered that the chairman did ask Zion to work in his company. But he did not appoint me as his secretary before.

It is impossible that grandpa also came back from the future, just like me. Because if that’s true, he should have already punished the person who killed him.

Then, is it because I changed the past too much?

While thinking so hard, I heard a thin and loud voice which is calling my name.

“Harriet! Harriet!”

I looked at my left and saw the thorn in my eyes, moving quickly towards mine.

It is Reese.

Standing before me, her anxious expression was shown dramatically.

“What did you do that?” she asked. “Didn’t we promise Madell that we won’t tell sir Sorren anything about the burn scar on your hand?”

Reese holds my right hand which has the burn scar, and she stared back at me.

“Miss Madell will definitely get back at you.”

With a nonchalant face, I looked at this girl who’s pretending that she’s really worried. I was so stupid for trusting her as my real friend.

“So you believe that it is better to cover their wrongdoings and lie just like what madam Sherly wants?” I asked Reese.

She too a deep sigh before answering, “In this mansion, they are the law. I am just worried for you, Harriet.”

Lie.

Reese just got worried to be in trouble with me. If she’s really concern as my friend, then in the first place, she would not stay still when Madell was hurting me, or even think of hiding the truth for a long time.

Perhaps, I was too blinded at the hope of having a friend inside this hellish place. I didn’t realize that I befriended a devil like her.

Bit by bit, I removed her hands away from me. Then, I tossed her a question.

“Are you really worried about me? Or you only feared that Madell will beat you instead of me?”

Her eyes turned round drastically. For maybe, she got so stunned that I read her thoughts exactly on point.

“H-Hey Harriet,” she stuttered. “As your friend, I got really worried for you. In addition to that, I know you won’t leave me at miss Madell’s hands. Because I am your friend, right?”

I fused my fingers into steely clamps.

‘Friend? Oh goodness gracious. This f*cking word again.’

I remembered how she used this term when she visited me in the jail and told me that I should die for her; because WE’RE FRIENDS.

[“I know that you did not kill sir Sorren. But you need to disappear, Harriet. For my happiness, the real heir must die. You will die for me, right? Since you are my friend, Nadia Wyatt.”]

She’s using our friendship as her way to think that I will do anything for her, even die.

Fury sprang to life. Anger poured through me like a water gushing from the broken dam. My temper sparked, so dangerous like electric bold. The rage nearly consumed my whole system, that it quickened my blood and thrummed through my veins.

‘I hate her so much. So much I wanted to beat her face.’

“Harriet. W-What’s wrong?” she asked.

At her question, it was then I found myself trembling in irritation and biting my lips so hard.

“A moment before, I was so shocked to see you wearing dress. You also talked back against Madam Sherly and miss Madell. Then, you are glaring at me right now. Are you angry? Did I so something that put you on a foul mood?”

If only you can remember what the hell you did to me in the future, you’ll be thankful that I am just glaring at you right now instead of beating you up.

After taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes.

‘I will take a revenge to Reese. But there’s a right time for that.’

When I opened my eyes, I gave her a smile which I always show to her before.

“Sorry, Reese. Perhaps, I was just so stunned by the chairman’s announcement before,” I said.

“Oh, really?”

“Hmmm,” I murmured. “And don’t worry, Reese. Madell is now under probation so she cannot do anything to us.”

Reese nodded her head.

‘Right. Madell’s revenge towards Reese isn’t enough for all the evil things she did to me before.’

When Reese raised her head, she suddenly clapped with a gasp, as if remembering something important.

“Oh right! If you will be sir Zion’s new secretary, then that means the two of you will be together everyday! Congratulations, Harriet! I know how happy you are right now.”

Happy?

What a bullsh*t.

If only I don’t know her true colors, I might have believe that she’s really happy for me.

Reese is the first person who knew about my feelings towards Zion. So why did she agree on being Zion’s fiancee when she knows about my unrequited love?

I can’t ask her right now because that only happened in the original future.

Anyway, no matter what her answer is, Reese is a snake who is ready to bite if chances arise.

“I heard my name just now.”

Reese and I both looked at the man who approached us. When Reese recognized him, she swiftly moved sideward and bowed her head to show her respect towards the grandchild of the chairman.

“Are you guys talking about me?” Zion asked.

My eyes went to him, they stayed there.

This is the first time we looked straightly at each other ever since I went back here in the past.

His twinkling eyes gawked at me, as if they have their own unique way to appear pleasing.

‘These are the eyes which stared at me with deep rage and fury.’

“Hey Harriet, you surprised me a lot,” Zion said. “Until now, your rebellious words against my mother still ring inside my ears. This is a compliment, though.”

I couldn’t answer. It seemed there is a lump in my throat as I listen to him.

“Oh right, where is your burn scar?”

He looked down and about to hold my right hand.

“Why did you hide me about t…”

Involuntarily, I pulled my hand away from him.

In shock, Zion’s eyes widened as he looked back.

A moment of silence swept the space. In the middle of stern atmosphere, I realized it too late that I just pushed Zion away from me.

‘My body reacted on its own.’

With all might, I set my eyes downcast and explained.

“I-I’m f-fine.”

“But I am not okay,” he quickly responded. “I am not okay to hear that my sister did this to you. If you told me beforehand, then she should have punished a way earlier.”

Sardonic laughs almost slipped through my mouth.

When I looked at him again, I asked him, “So you believe that Madell really wronged me? And that your mother was lying before?”

Without hesitation, Zion nodded his head.

“Yeah. I knew them, and how they treat you. Isn’t that the reason why I always tell you to get out of this house?”

Once again, my mouth shut as sob rose in my throat. Great pang gripped my heart, a pining melancholy which made my eyes felt so hot.

‘You believed me against your mom and sister. Then how come you easily accused me as the murderer of grandpa Sorren?! Why did you abandon me, Zion? Why? Why?!’

I kept the shouts inside my brain. Tears pricked the corner of my eyes, I had to take deep breaths to stop them from falling down.

‘I can’t cry here. If I did, then it shows how weak I am in front of Zion.’

“Actually, I really don’t want to work at grandpa’s company,” Zion added. “But if you will be with me as my secretary, then I think it would be so fun. I am so excited to work with you, Harriet.”

Well, I am not.

I once wished to be with him for a long time, and as closer as it can be. But the only applies to the old Harriet Avellino.

“You look so pretty today, Harriet. That yellow dress suits you a lot,” he said.

“Right, sir!” Reese suddenly butted into our conversation.

I tilted my head and looked at the girl who’s blushing beside me. She looks as if she’s the one who received the compliment from Zion.

“That is why I always tell Harriet to doll up,” Reese said. “In that way, she’ll get noticed by you, sir Zion.”

“Huh?” Zion uttered. “Why would Harriet feel that?”

“Oh, geez, sir. It is so obvious that Harriet has fee…”

Reese did not continue her words, and instead covered her mouth with a gasp.

“Ahhh!”

Then she looked worriedly at me with guilt in her eyes.

[“I am so sorry”] she mouthed.

After putting me on the awkward position, Reese avoided my gaze and bit her lower lip.

‘She purposely did it. Reese purposely spill out my secret to Zion!’

And why?

Why did she do that?

To embarrass me?

“What does it mean?” Zion asked.

He looked down, turning his eyes with malicious grin before his brows moved up and down.

“Why would you like me to notice you, Harriet?” he asked.

My eyes squinted at him while watching his expression.

“S-Sir. I did n-not mean anything to that,” Reese answered, even if the question is for me. “It is because sir Zion rarely visits the mansion and so Harriet waits for you everyday. She just wanted to see you. So I hope, sir Zion will visit frequently.” After saying these stupid words, she tucked her hair behind her ears.

I got it.

I got it now.

Since the truth came clearly into my sigh, I finally found out the things that I failed to notice before.

Zion knew from the very beginning that I love him, but he is only pretending he did not.

Meanwhile, Reese also harbor feelings towards Zion. And so when she got the chance, she made herself as his fiancee.

‘These bastards.’

Unable to contain my emotions, I chuckled a bit, which made them stopped. Next, I carefully detached my lips.

“It is true that I feel happy whenever you’re around,” I said to Zion. “But I did not doll myself today just to get your attention. I wanted to be pretty not because of someone, but because I deserve it.”

Zion could not respond, and I saw Reese gaped hardly at me.

“I am the chairman’s secretary. So, I just think there’s nothing wrong in making myself a bit pretty.”

“Harriet.”

I pretended I did not hear his call and then glanced at my wrist watch.

“Ohhh. I think I need to go and meet the chairman. We have lot of things to do regarding his retirement. So if I may excuse myself.”

I slightly bowed my head to the stunned man and walked pass him. Halting my pace, I looked back at him.

“Oh right,” I said. “Thank you for the dress that you gave me before. But starting from now on, you don’t need to give me a gift. Please don’t do that anymore, sir Zion.”

I turned around and walked away with new heart.

Even if it is hard, I will abandon the people who tossed me out before.