It was my day off. As if on cue, Mia had come in early that morning, even before I dragged my sad self out of bed and she offered to take care of the kids while I got some free time to myself. If she was worried about my puffy eyes and red nose, she did not show it, but I knew she was only trying to be understanding by not bombarding me with questions. That I was thankful for.
I was lucky enough to have missed Lucas this morning, I could not trust myself to not break down into tears at the sight of him after last night. Just the thought of how he had called me her name, and I was sobbing like a broken tap again. It hurt, and even more so because I hardly ever fucking cried and much less over an asshole like Lucas.
Yet you love him
The thought was ev
My heart still raced from being startled, and I clutched my chest, trying to regain my composure after the scare. Lucas was on his feet now, eyes wide with rage and his jaws clenched so hard that I thought they would crack any moment."Where the fuck have you been?" he asked again, much louder seeing as I did not answer the first time."You scared me, Lucas," I said, shaking my head, "what were you doing sitting in the dark?""Going crazy worrying about you that's what. But that does not answer my question," he growled, stalking closer to me, "where have you been all day?""It's my day off," I reminded him with a scowl, "surely I am allowed to go out. I do not own all the problems in the world."
"What do you think about this one?" I raised the ball of yarn so Mia could get a better view."Abby would love it," she said, wheeling the cart closer and taking one to get a better look. "She's a pink princess.""So green for Aiden and Pink for Abby, typical twins," I chuckled and filled her cart with the balls in my hand.It had been a week since Lucas and I decided to take a break from each other. The week had been horribly difficult and it was even more difficult on days where we had to go through an activity together with the kids. I realized soon enough that we were both doing a shit job at going with the flow of just employer and employee. So I made the choice to avoid him as much as possible, but that only seemed to make him come closer, clearly, I was not the on
The next morning, Lucas woke up feeling even worse than he felt last night. Mia had gone home last night after she made me promise a thousand promises to call if he did not get better overnight, so I had my hands full with taking care of the kids and looking after Lucas too.The latter was harder though since Lucas would not even admit to being sick."I'm fine, I swear," he grumbled as I put my hand over his head again."No, you're not. People who are fine do not have high temperatures enough to burn up." I leaned back from where I sat on the mattress next to the cold water and towel I used on him all morning. It almost felt weird sitting next to him in the same bed and I worked hard to keep memories of how many times he had taken me on this very bed from my
"Let me check your temperature again," I held the gun up to his head as Lucas put his shirt over his head."We're on our way to the hospital Chris," he breathed and clutched his head.I felt a small twinge of guilt for making him speak since talking only seemed to intensify his acting head.It was Saturday morning and Lucas was not anywhere near better, and the light rain drizzling this morning only added to make him feel even worse. He was still very warm outside but shivered occasionally from the could of the downpour outside.Feeling too tunned to speak after his confession last night, I let my mind wander with all the different reasons he must have said those words, and the thought was enough to lull me
"Chris, are you awake?" a tiny distressed whisper woke me the next morning, followed by a tiny hand brushing the air away from my face. It was way smaller and much much weaker than the arms wrapped tightly around me."'Daddy?" a tiny voice called softly again and this time it was enough to make me jump awake.I was locked firmly in Lucas's firm grip, more than half of my body hauled over him and the blankets covering us in the same spot he lay as we came home from the hospital."Chris," the distressed voice was Abby's. I looked up quickly to see her standing above us, her new favorite stuffed animal in her grasp. Her eyes were wide and curious and terrified too.The living room was dark save for the dim lig
On Friday after picking the kids from school, we stopped by the market for fresh fruits on the other side of town as we made our way home. The kids had been going on all week about how much they would like to visit a natural market that was not limited to what they saw at the mall. It took some time but we finally located one on the far end of town, just a few miles from where I lived before moving in with the Maxwell's.Just like everything else I had done in the last three days, this was a perfect, most needed distraction, especially since he had had to work home more often since he recovered. Our conversations after I walked out of the elevatpor almost crying had been limited to the hi's and hello.Any distraction I got, I took it happily, because I would much rather be distracted than cry my eyes out all
Lucas stiffened the moment he realized the words that just left his mouth, I was just as frozen to the spot, eyes glued to his and my chest thumping so hard, it roared in my earThe first time he had said those words to me, he clearly did not know I was awake enough to hear him. At least that time I got the chance to escape giving him a reply by pretending I was sleeping like he expected I was.I had hoped to get some time to prepare myself for those three words before he popped them up on m again, but clearly, there were other plans in store and now, I was standing face to face with him with his skin on mine, completely clueless in what to say to him."Is that a trick to try to get into my knickers tonight?" I joked, trying to force a laugh and failing mise
Lucas and I barely made it past the elevator doors, before he had his hands and mouth all over my body. He pressed me to the steel cold wall, mouth devouring mine mercilessly, and hands working to shed off whatever little clothing I had on.With his free hand, he reached over, pressing the red button that brought the elevator to a quick stop for the second time this week. "What are you doing?" I managed to ask in breathy pants when he pulled back slightly.He cupped my cheeks in one palm while the other wrapped around my neck loosely. "Do you know the only thing that has occupied my brain all week?" His voice was hoarse, deep, and dripped with lust and need for me.I shook my head lightly, even though I had quite an idea what that was saying as I had shared
Mia got married at the Terranea Resort. It was one of those places in California I had heard of but never so much as dreamt of being in. The ceremony took place by the beach cove overlooking the rolling mountains that gave way to a panoramic view of the sea. I was even more awed to see how they had turned it into the fairytale every girl dreamed of.The four pillar altar was decorated in red roses all around the roof—a befitting color for the month—with green branches curling around each pillar to the root. Red rose petals arranged in large cursive hearts littered the aisle leading to the altar, and golden candle lanterns were lit on either side. Even the seats were dressed in pink fabrics and red bows attached behind. It was like an early valentine's day, only more magical.The day became even more magical when Mia arrived in a carriage, yes a frigging carriage. As I got to my feet along with everyone else in attendance, I watched with the same awe and fascination with which I had wa
Christmas had never been anything special for me. I had spent my last two Christmas' before this working an all-day shift at work, wiping vomit off tables and getting yelled at by unhappy customers taking their anger and frustrations on me. Afterward, C and I would spend the morning drinking on a rooftop and dancing to Fuck Christmas by Eric Idle. It was not exactly like I was the grinch or that I forbade the holiday spirit, there really was just nothing to celebrate or be happy for. After spending most of my childhood holidays hoping I would escape some beating or screaming from the matron on duty at the foster care that day who would rather be drinking her guts out on her day off, it was not exactly my favorite time of the year, so I said a big fuck you to it every year.This year though, it was a whole different story. Like I had stepped into this perfect, in your dreams life belonging to someone else. And for the first time in my life, the reality was the more preferable option. T
Where do I begin? From our awkward first meeting to having bad guys and crazy exes thrown in jail, Lucas and I had been through one hell of a journey. The longest one I had ever been through my adulthood, I would dare to say. It was amazing to think how much my life had changed in the months I had known Lucas and the twins. I had gone from independent and never needing anyone besides my best friend to this woman who could not even do so much as breathe without them."Are you okay?" Celine asked, tilting her face to meet mine in the mirror."Nervous," I said, going for honesty as I tugged on the hem of the white fitted dress clinging to my body."'Oh bess," she cooed, adjusting my veil, "you have every right to be, it's your big day."I smiled sheepishly at the thought, staring down at the ring on my finger that would be joined by another in a few minutes, "It is my big day. Oh my God, I'm getting married bess." The words slammed a fresh dose of unrestrained happiness against my heart
Every story I'd hard about the afterlife was a big fat lie. There were no angels in white robes, no opera waiting to usher me into the gates of heaven but then again who said I was going to heaven. The pain shooting up my body felt everything like hell, or at least I knew the one coming would. I clamp my eyes closed tighter as I lay on the floor in what I know is my pool of blood, waiting for the pain I hope to come. She succeeded and I let her win, I let Sarah shoot me. There was no longer going to be the amazing sex with Lucas, no spending afternoons with the kids, no harmless gossips disguised as Sunday lunch dates with my best friend. No more of Lucas's family, all of that was now simply gone, just gone.The thought left a hot burning scar on my throat and I gasped, fighting to take in the air that was not coming. This really was it, I had lost and she had won. But the arms suddenly wrapping me in a warm embrace felt too familiar to be related to the icy feeling of dying."Chris?!
You know that feeling when you wake up to a day that just feels off right from the moment you open your eyes? It could be the harsh rays of the sun nearly blinding and forcing you to wake up early on a Saturday morning or the annoying sound of your alarm reminding you that it's a Monday Morning again after you spent Sunday evening drinking your guts out. That small, seemingly unimportant detail in your morning that makes sure you have a bad rest of your day. I was having one of those mornings, but unlike most, I knew exactly why it was going to be a bad day.After laying motionless in the same spot for what felt like an eternity, body unwilling to move and mind refusing to come alive, I finally found a reason to get up, thanks to my pressing bladder. I walked back into the room after finishing my business and realized for the first time this morning, that Lucas was not here and the kids had not come to barge down my door in search of me.I knew Lucas would leave early for what he had
It was sweet effing relief. After almost two months here, we were finally making the trip back home. While there were less than relieving reasons involved, it still brought a wide grin to my face when the sound of the wheels scraping the runway of Lindbergh field reached my ears.Martha and Calvin were the first to welcome us home, with Calvin giving the usual manly hugs and pats on the back to his two sons and Martha going through a long streak of teary hugs and sobbing her thanks that her grandbabies were okay. She had insisted all three of them rode in their car with them as we came home from the airport. I realized it had probably been a wise choice to keep them oblivious to my pregnancy. Martha, for one, would have thrown a fit if her hopes of having a new grandchild were suddenly crushed by my miscarriage.After almost two months away, I had almost forgotten what it felt like to be normal. My usual routine, the one I had when my life was still a simple cycle of getting Abby and
What happened to the curious cat again? Ah yes, she got her neck snapped by her fiance's supposed best friend because she would not simply stay out of trouble. I was fairly sure, no most certainly positive that was what Adrian would do to me as his eyes bored into me with something that looked rather far from the friendliness I had seen when we first met. Maybe my body would be found in a nearby dumpster in a week or more.And then it hit me. Lucas had told me he was coming here to check on security hours ago and as I stood there scanning the room briefly, he was absolutely nowhere in sight. Oh, my God! Maybe he hurt Lucas and was now taking out whatever anger was left in him on Baron. I thought they were supposed to be best friends.The thought had not completely settled in my mind when a familiar figure stepped out of the shadows, wiping his hand on a towel stained in crimson. It was Lucas. He halted in his steps as his eyes landed on me, shock and a slightly less version of anger f
It was hard to tell how long we lay there, with me half-naked and asleep in Lucas' arms. But when I woke up to the light scruff of grass against my knee, the red-orange of the sky told me we had been there in that position for quite a while."I'm sorry," Lucas rasped, and I realized we had shifted from the position we were in when I fell asleep. Lucas sat with his back against the wall of the maze, holding me to himself. It was the closest we had been to each other, with the obvious exemption of how intimate we had been before I drifted asleep. "I didn't mean to wake you up,""How long did I sleep?" I asked, with quite an idea in mind."Not long enough, you needed the rest." he stroked my head as he spoke."You should have woken me," I gave a brief chuckle, followed by a wince at the numbness in my hands as I attempted to pull myself away from him and sit up.Lucas held on to me tighter though, tutting and shaking his head as he did. "I don't want you to leave just yet, stay here in m
I had not realized just how much I needed to breathe fresh air that was not sullied by a mixture of stale air, pills from the doctor, and a large dose of my sadness. For what first like the first time in forever, the sight of food did not make my stomach churn, or at least it did in the right way. The scent of freshly made orange juice and blueberry danishes set out on the picnic table only made my mouth water and my empty stomach growl. I turned to my best friend the closest thing I had to a sister with a smile. "You planned this?" Of course, she did. I had to be the luckiest human on the planet to have everyone I had in my life now. She rounded the table, taking her seat with a knowing smile. "I was hopeful that today would be a good day." I tilted my head, a fresh wave of guilt pulling at my chest. I had been so drowned in my sadness that I had completely neglected everyone, myself included. "I'm so sorry for shutting you out too, Bess." She shook her head tersely, "Nope, we ar