Veronica-Waking up next to Lyrek, I instantly felt sick to my stomach. Turning onto my side, I looked at his sleeping form. I wasn’t sure what time he came into the room last night, but I knew it was late because I had already been asleep.It was still hard to believe he was leaving today. I knew he was going to return in a couple of days, but I wasn’t looking forward to it. He has become a constant part of my life lately and I hated the thought of him being clear across the country.At least right at this moment, he was sleeping soundly, which meant I didn’t have to part with him just yet. My emotions and mental state were a wreck with everything that has been happening the past few days. It didn’t help that he would be waking up soon to get ready to get on a flight.I wanted to tell him how I felt, but I honestly didn’t know anymore. There was a part of me that felt that my feelings for him were nothing more than gratitude. After my therapy appointment, I have only become more conf
Veronica-“Let me get this straight, he told you that he loved you, but you didn’t say it back?” Dr. Hendrix asked after I explained everything that had happened.“It isn’t that I didn’t want to tell him. If I told him now, I wouldn’t know if it was out of obligation or if it was truly how I am feeling. Don’t get me wrong, I have a lot of strong feelings for him. He is saving my brother’s life and he saved mine, but how do I know for sure that I do love him?”After seeing Lyrek off at the airport, I returned to the hospital because Dr. Hendrix agreed to meet with me. I felt like seeing her was the best thing I could do at that moment. Right now, I was beginning to wonder what was going on in my head that I automatically thought about talking to a therapist about this.“That is going to be up to you to decide. I can’t tell you what to feel, only help you figure out a way to understand what it is that you are feeling. Even then I can’t guarantee results.” I wanted to scream in frustrat
Lyrek-I wanted to rush home as soon as I got out of surgery. My entire body was buzzing with exhilaration. For the first time since I started Andrew’s case, I finally had a solid breakthrough.Not just hope or feel like there was a shot at saving him, but an absolute belief. The patient we just operated on had nearly the same kind of tumor that Andrew had, except Andrew’s was more progressed. Although the surgery had been intense and there had been a few touch-and-go moments, I now knew what I needed to do to remove it.It has been years that I have felt like this on a case. After I manage to save my wife’s brother, I want to take on more cases that seemed like a lost cause. It has been a long time since I have challenged myself like this, to this degree.Since I couldn’t head home after surgery, I caught the first flight out the following morning. It has been a few days since I was home, and I couldn’t wait to tell Veronica the good news. We haven’t had much of a chance to talk sinc
Veronica-I didn’t have the words to express how I was feeling at hearing his words, instead, I raised up to press my lips against his. It was in this moment I felt like I could tell him that I loved him, but I knew that I needed to organize my feelings first. I felt an immense amount of gratitude towards him, which meant I could be mistaking my feeling for that and not love.When he turned my body and pressed me against the wall, I had this urge to stop him, but I couldn’t bring myself to do so. It might be wrong that I was allowing this to happen, without knowing for sure what I felt. The last thing I wanted to do was lead him on.His lips against mine felt like a touch of heaven. Everything inside of me was coming alive as his hands moved to my hips and he pressed his body against mine. Was it wrong that I felt so much pleasure like this?Not wanting to think about anything, other than how he made my body feel, I cleared my thoughts of my heart’s desires. Wanting to feel his body n
Veronica-“Do I truly get the surgery?” Andrew asked with tears in his eyes.As I promised my brother, I returned to the hospital the following morning. Lyrek had already left to go to the hospital before I woke up. He left me a note saying he wanted to make sure everything was still a go for the surgery.I waited until Lyrek came to the room with Andrew and me because I had wanted him to explain in better detail. The wait had been gruesome, but I managed to keep it to myself until he arrived. What I hadn’t expected though, was for Andrew to become so emotional.“You are going to need to get one more dose of chemo and two more high dosages of radiation, but as long as your stats remain within the limits, we can begin operating a week from today.” Lyrek smiled at Andrew, his hand resting on his head.I could see in the way he was looking at my brother, that he genuinely cared for him. My heart fluttered at the sight of the two of them. Admittedly I did feel a little jealous that Andrew
Lyrek-Out of all the questions I could have been asked by a ten-year-old, that wasn’t one I anticipated. Taken aback by his question, I couldn’t bring myself to speak. My entire existence wanted to scream yes, but my mouth wouldn’t work.When I imagined my life with them, I hadn’t thought about becoming his father. Although at this current moment I couldn’t speak, I knew my answer. Gathering him into a hug, I slowly found my voice once more.“It would be my greatest honor.” I told Andrew, my voice cracking just a little.His arms came around me as he released a sound of delight, which sounded much like a chipmunk rather than a small child. We hugged each other for a while until he pulled away once again filled with energy. Focusing on our food, we had to remind Andrew to slow down a few times.“I want to see the penguins, Dad.” Andrew announced after he finished his food and stood up.With a chuckle, I rubbed the top of his head. “Then let’s go see the penguins.”Since they weren’t f
Veronica-As the week went by, I felt more anxious every day. Now that the day was practically here, I wished I could turn back the clock to have more time with Andrew. Tomorrow he would be having his surgery and I couldn’t help but think that this might be my last day with him.I didn’t leave his side all week because I wanted to spend every moment I could with him. It has been a rough week for him since his treatments were more vigorous than before. He has been bedridden most of the time.“Will they tell me before they put me to sleep?” Andrew asked out of the blue.It was nighttime and I was lying in bed with him because he wanted me to hold him. I had thought he had fallen asleep, so I was a little surprised by his sudden question.“I am sure they will.” I answered honestly, while I pulled him closer to me and held onto him.“I don’t want them to. I would prefer it if I didn’t know.” His voice was soft, making it so it was difficult to hear him.“Why don’t you want to know?”“I am
Veronica-Choking back my tears, I tried to be strong as I watched Andrew be taken through the double doors that led to the operating rooms. It pained me that I couldn’t follow him back there. I made sure to tell him that I loved him, and we said goodbye.He was adamant about telling each other goodbye because he was afraid I would regret it if he didn’t pull through the surgery. I had to keep reminding myself to be strong. No matter what, I needed to believe that this wasn’t goodbye for us.“Veronica!” Lyrek’s voice yelled my name as I turned to wait in the waiting room.I didn’t get a chance to turn on my own before he grabbed my arm and spun me around. Looking into his face, I could see he was in a panic. The last thing anyone needed right now was for him to be panicking over anything right now.“What is wrong?” I asked him while doing my best to keep my voice steady.“How do you feel about me?” He rushed out the words so fast that I couldn’t register what he was asking.“Huh?” I l