CH 0004

“Arhhhhhhhhh!” It was the nth time Skylar had screamed her lungs out, the more she wallowed in self-memory, her body cringing at the memory of what happened with Ivan Hamilton.

She didn't know whether to cry or laugh the moment she had woken up from his house in the early hours of the morning, and how she packed her load and ran out of the mansion in a frenzy, leaving him still sleeping in bed. She knew she had lost all sense of reasoning.

And all day since she got home, the only thing she could do was cuss herself out and blame herself while still in pain for the damage he had done in between her legs.

‘How could she? How could she be so unprofessional and lose herself?! How could she lose herself to Ivan Hamilton of all men?! A man who could have any lady at his disposal and would not give a damn about her.’

‘What if he thought she was like other girls that threw themselves at him like some cheap whore?!’

And she knew he loathed ladies without self-control. What would she do if he started to hate her too? There was no way her job would make sense anymore if Ivan Hamilton ever hated her.’

Skylar felt tainted, as her skin crawled with the memory of his touch, every fiber of her recoiling at the thoughts of how it started with just a harmless kiss.

‘Goodness! She was ruined! How could she give what she had been planning to give to her next boyfriend once she finally got the chance to be free from hectic schedules, to her hot boss?! She must have gone insane!’

‘What had she done?’ The question echoed in her mind endlessly, the more she wallowed in sadness. The consequences of what happened between them were very intense and terrifying. She didn't think she could ever face him again. Not after what happened.

Skylar sat in a warm tub for so many hours that she lost count of time, while shedding soft tears for reasons she didn't even know, no matter how hard she tried to think about it.

As much as in-between her legs seemed to still be very sore with a burning sensation because of how roughly he had gone down on her, her body could not help but react sensually at the slightest remembrance of everything that ensued between them.

Flashes of the night before played like a broken record in her head, and all she could see was Ivan's face, hear, was the sound of his voice, and feel, was the touch of his hands all over her body. She felt a wave of nausea hit her as she stopped to catch her breath at the tempting imagination of it, as she leaned against the cold wall of her tub.

The thought of how he had bitten everywhere in her neck and breast made her go crazy with ache, and how he had flicked and ravaged every inch of her body made her core clench hard even in pleasurable pain.

‘What was wrong with her?!’ Skylar cautioned herself and called her mind back to reality.

‘First, she had messed up. Secondly, it was glaring that she had already lost her job even if no one told her. Thirdly, she had lost herself to him! How would she cope with her life now?!’ she began to shed tears again, so much that her eyes hurt.

‘Darn that useless party. Darn, all the useless things she drank! Darn, her disobedience when he told her to leave him alone!’

As the afternoon wore on, she found herself curled up on her couch, staring blankly at the wall and unable to eat or do anything. The only person she could think of calling was her best friend, who was the only person she could share her pain with.

“Amy,” Skylar called weakly as soon as the lady from the other side of the phone picked up, her voice shaky and filled with so much regret.

“Skylar. What is wrong? Are you fine?” Her friend from the other side questioned, her voice laced with concern that something seemed to be bothering her.

“I… I don't think so,” words got caught in Skylar's throat as she struggled to find breath so that she would not start crying again.

“Is it your boss again? Did he make you cry?” Amelia's voice was laced with irritation at the mention of Ivan.

“I am the one. I am the one at fault and I think things are going wrong now. I don't know what to do,” Skylar gritted her teeth hard as her lips quivered, while trying to hide the fact that she was struggling not to allow her tears to roll down her cheeks.

“I don't understand, sweetheart. Care to talk about it?”

“I messed up big time, Amy. I… I.. I don't even know. But I think I'm going to lose my job. Something unforgivable happened, and I made a mistake, and I lost myself too,” Skylar continued to speak incoherently, the words of what truly happened between her and Ivan too huge for her to tell her friend at that moment.

“You know what? This is for the best. It is time for you to wake up, and leave a life that does not revolve around that narcissist boss of yours,” Amy cut in impatiently, already grouchy just hearing that her source of sadness was Ivan again, “Write a resignation letter and shove it to his face. Make sure to say everything you have also wanted to! In fact, I will send you a draft of what to say,” Amelia offered tenaciously, her voice dripping with spite.

“But. I.. don't…”

Amelia scoffed even before she heard Skylar’s protest, “No buts,” she emphasized, “You are a hardworking, smart, and good-looking lady, and you will find a decent job in no time. Why slave away to that arrogant bastard? And I can even slot your name in for the next employment, and we can both be flight attendants. It is going to be fun.”

Skylar could remember the first time she met Amelia when they were in college, and how her bright and bubbly personality attracted her the most. They have been friends since then, finished school together, and both applied for the same jobs while still living together.

When they applied at HAVAN conglomerate and other big companies and firms, to be secretaries, they both got rejected several times, and failed if they were called to interviews. However, luck shined on Skylar when she was suddenly called to begin work at HAVAN, when the secretary who was employed instead, quit within two days.

Months later, Amelia went for training and soon became a flight attendant, which caused them to be apart most of the time because her job required them to always be on air. Still, they were best of friends regardless.

“That is probably what I should do and save myself further stress, right?” Skylar questioned again, her heart aching at the decision that seemed like the only option for her to find peace.

“Do not overthink it,” Amelia chided her, “You go, girl. You've got this!”

…………

All night till the next day, Skylar had written and torn countless resignation letters, as she poured out her heart in one, and wrote too little in another. The next day, she spent it sending her resume to other companies that had an opening for secretaries, and sat in a hot tub all evening to make herself feel better.

Finally, exhausted and drained after sleeping all day, she knew she had to make a hard decision the next morning. At least, that would give her peace and reduce her mortification.

She had barely slept a wink all night, and when dawn broke, she was already up. She went to the bathroom and scrubbed herself over and over again, before taking time to apply perfect makeup that exuded fierceness with each perfect layer.

After she was done, she chose her outfit carefully, and it was a tailored suit that she had bought a year ago for half her salary, because she had to attend a conference in Manila with Ivan, and could never afford to be shady. She hadn't worn it since then and just kept it in her wardrobe till the perfect time to wear it would come again. To her, now was the perfect time.

Unlike the usual ponytail she usually packed, she straightened and left her hair in loose waves, and completed her impeccable look with a pair of matching heels. Once again, as she took a final glance at the mirror, she reminded herself that it was the best. She had to do it before he would ridicule and belittle her with skanks.

Arriving at the head company much earlier than usual, Skylar approached her boss's office with elegant and confident strides, her heart pounding in anxiety even if she tried to hide it. She planned to get there earlier than him, leave the resignation letter on his desk, pack her stuff, and make her exit before he arrived.

But as she pushed open the door carefully, her heart sank instantly, the moment the whiff of Ivan's cologne bashed her nostrils. He was already there, seated behind his desk with his head bent over some papers.

His eyes raised as she entered, his eyes locking onto hers with a mix of surprise and something unreadable. He had not expected to see her that early.

She froze momentarily, the words she had rehearsed a thousand times in front of the mirror, catching in her throat at that moment. Her mind became a blank mark, and she suddenly needed the gingering spirit that Amelia would have cheered her on with.

At that sudden moment, words flowed, “You asshole! Why should I be the one to resign from my job when you are the one who initiated what happened between us?! Such an unfair life. Arrogant bastards get to keep their pride when poor people like me have to take the fall? Well, that's what I'm doing now!”

“Here is my resignation letter and I hope I do not have to see you ever again after putting up with your acts for three fucking years! Ah! Do I not deserve some kind of award? Well, people who deserve me will find me. Good luck finding a person as perfect as me, even if I'm sure there's no way you can ever find someone else who will put up with you the way I have! Good day, Ivan Hamilton!”