VANESSA
Both of his hands were on my hips moving my body in a rhythm. He was enjoying the view from below while I bounced on his disco stick. In the air I could smell freshly baked pastries from the bakery just below my apartment.
Mmm...
Maybe afterwards, I thought to myself. After a workout like this, I deserved a pastry smothered in chocolate, we've been going at it for a good twenty minutes now. Beads of sweat had slipped down between my breasts and all at this point.
The sex was good, despite the many distractions that surrounded me. Like the noise of the outside world coming through my opened bedroom window. It was summertime too which meant windows being open was a necessity. I was practically melting, especially during the act itself.
The big distraction of all was how much I was in my head — at all times. In my head about my past. The secrets that I keep from the people that surround me and the mistakes that I've made since.
Big mistakes -- Ones I wish I hadn't made.
"You're so hot. Do you even realise how hot you are?"He said and sat up in bed. He was holding my naked body firmly against his as we moved."Your body is on fire and your ass is so fucking firm."
"Don't talk, "I whispered against his lips. I didn't want to hear it — I didn't need to hear it. I just wanted him to be quiet and to touch me like I want to be touched.
"If that's what you want."He moaned against me as I increased speed. Both of his hands were cupping my breasts and squeezing them as the intensity grew.
"Holy shit, Yes!"He released his load into the condom and lay back on the mattress.
I lay down next to him looking up at the cracks on my bedroom ceiling and listening to the noise of the traffic below us.
He looked across at me and smiled."Wow that was really something."He attempted to lace his fingers with mine but I was quick to pull away. This is the first time he has tried something like this with me in the months that we've known each other. It's become apparent to me that he has become attached — but I haven't. I won't allow that to happen.
He should know better.
I stood from the bed and slipped a robe on over my naked body."You should get going."
He released a sigh."I know the drill, Vanessa." He replied and stood from the bed and started to pick his clothes up from the floor."So do you have somewhere you need to be?"
"Just a party. My friend got engaged recently."I stood at my vanity mirror moving a brush through my hair.
"A party..."He slipped his jeans up his legs."I wouldn't mind going to a party. Why didn't you ask me to go with you?"
"We don't do that sort of thing."I replied.
"You mean talk or hang out. I guess I'm just that neighbour that you like to fuck when the mood strikes. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining about our arrangement..."
"It sounds like you're complaining."
"I'm not. I just think it would be nice to have a conversation every now and again, I don't know anything about you other than the obvious."He pulled his T-shirt on over his head.
I turned around and looked at him."And what's the obvious?"
"Well whoever hurt you in the past fucked you up big time. Someone hurt you and you're finding your own way of lashing out. Am I right or am I wrong?"
Mr know it all! I felt the urge to kick him where it hurt, to scream and shout until all the anger was released from within me."I want you to go."
He clicked his tongue off the roof of his mouth. "Vanessa..."
"I said get out, Colin. I don't want to talk to you right now."I turned my back to him and started clearing up while I waited for him to get fed up and leave. I didn't turn back around again until I heard my front door closing and I knew he was gone.
The first man to tell me how fucked up I am. It hurt me a little, even though I knew it was true.
I grabbed my little black dress that was hanging on the wardrobe door and I walked into the bathroom to freshen up.
I showed up at the bar an hour later and the guests had already started to arrive. The bar was decorated with balloons and banners, but it was rustic and elegant. There was even free champagne so I was definitely happy about that.
You found the free champagne before you found me. I'm hurt."I heard Alex's voice and I turned around happy to see a friendly face. My closest companion in life.
"I was looking for you I swear, I just found the champagne first."We made the agreement that we would meet out front since the party is most likely filled with people that we don't know. I arrived here later than him I guess"It was so hot out today so I was thirsty."
"Yeah, I'm sure that has nothing to do with that neighbour you've been spending your time with lately."He gave me a sideways glance and picked up a glass from the bar.
"He's just a friend."Alex and I walked alongside each other through the crowd of guests.
"A friend that you screw."He whispered."I get it. He gives you what you need. Just don't be surprised when feelings get involved and I don't mean yours — I mean his."
"There's no feelings."Just good sex I thought to myself. We're both getting what we need from one another."Colin and I have an arrangement that suits us. Neither of us wants it to go any further than that."
"If you say so."Alex drank from his glass."So are you worried about bumping into you know who tonight?"
Of course, I am.
"I don't want to see him. But you know I wasn't going to miss out on tonight no matter what. If I see him, then I'll just pretend that he doesn't exist." Alex and I clinked our glasses together in agreement.
Natasha spotted us and rushed over."You're here. My friends."She threw her arms around us both." I'm so glad you two are finally here, I've been stuck chatting to Ollie's friends for way too long."
I chuckled and returned the hug."Well, we're here to rescue you."
"I see you both got some free champagne. I told the waiter to keep pouring so help yourselfs, I want you two to have fun tonight. My parents have been arguing since they arrived."Natasha rolled her eyes.
"That's nothing new."Alex chuckled.
"Tell me about it. They're not exactly the best role models, are they."She shook her head."Anyway, there are lots of single guys here that Ollie works with. Some of them are hot enough to make me wish to be single again."
"It's not a party without some hot gay men." Alex joked.
Ollie snaked his arms around Natasha from behind."Sorry, Guys. I need to steel my beloved fiancé for a couple of minutes. She won't be long."
"I'll be back in five. If not come save me."She whispered and followed behind her groom to be.
"I don't think we'll be seeing much of that one tonight." said Alex."It's just you and I, Lovely."
"Are you sure about that?"I brought his attention to the tall and handsome man across the room. Mr Handsome was looking at Alex and making it obvious that he was interested. "Why don't you go and introduce yourself."
"And leave you alone. No."He shook his head.
"I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself. Go and get him."I encouraged. I didn't want him to miss out just because I was alone. What kind of friend would I be.
"Alright I'm going, "He walked through the crowd towards Mr Handsome and I watched on as he approached him and started a conversation. Alex then looked my way and winked so I knew that it was going okay.
I guess it's just me now...
I grabbed my third refill and stayed by the bar looking around the room in hopes there was no one I knew, that I would have to hold a conversation with. I wasn't in the mood for pity or questions — and trust me there was always pity and questions.
"He's not here."I heard Ollie's voice and snapped my head around."I've noticed you looking around the room. You're looking for Jeremy."
"No."I replied without hesitation."I mean yes. I was worried that he was going to be here tonight, I don't want to see him."
"He's not coming. He didn't think that you would come if he did and he didn't want you missing out on tonight."Ollie explained."She's your best friend and he's mine. It's a little awkward, Right?"
I nodded my head in agreement. If only they knew the truth behind all of this, they would understand my reasons for shutting him out of my life. But they don't know — no one does.
"He asks about you, Vanessa. When I do see him it's at the office, where he spends most of his time these days. If he's not there, then he's home alone drinking and becoming more miserable by the day."
"No offence, Ollie. But you don't know what you're talking about. Jeremy and I — there's — it doesn't matter."There was no need for an explanation since I couldn't share the real truth. To him and everyone else, I'm just the bitch that left her husband heartbroken.
He mustered a smile."I'll go see if Natasha needs me."He walked away. I didn't want Ollie to ever dislike me, I wanted to get along with him for the sake of Natasha. I just hate when people think they know what's best for you when they really have no clue.
A couple of hours later and it was past midnight. Some people had left already, but the bar was still packed enough that it was hard to get a seat to sit on.
A blonde-haired man going by the name of Greg was trying his luck with me by the bar. No part of me was welcoming it or enjoying it. But like a lot of men, he just wasn't getting the hint.
"I'm the oldest friend he has, Ollie and I use to play together when we were younger. Our Mothers were best friends so we basically grew up like brothers. How do you know them?"He asked.
"I'm best friends with the bride to be. I'm the one that introduced them actually."
"Cheers to you for setting that up."He smiled. "Let me get you a drink."
"No that's okay I'm..."
"Oh come on, it's just one drink."He grabbed two glasses of champagne before I could protest for a second time."The champagne is good, drink up."
I drank from my glass, not because he told me to, but because I wanted a drink. All the love in the air was making me nauseous so I plan to get totally drunk so I can block it all out and not remember it tomorrow.
"Vanessa.."He smirked as my name left his lips. He was looking at me with his pervy eyes, from my boobs all the way down my legs."You do know you're the hottest woman in this bar tonight."
"Thank you for saying so. I made an effort."
"I can tell."He winked at me."You know we could always ditch this place if you're interested? You already know that I am."
"I'm not. I don't sleep around."I was laughing on the inside at that one. I drank the remainder of my champagne and grabbed my clutch bag."So I have to get going. But thank you for the free champagne."I walked past him through the crowd of guests before he tried to use his words of persuasion on me again.
I saw that Alex was cosy with Mr Handsome so I left him to it. If I tell him I'm leaving then he'll leave with me and I didn't want to do that to him. I went searching for Natasha.
She was sitting with Ollie, kissing and hugging him. Loved up couples depressed me these days, except for those two. I love seeing them together and I love that she's happy.
I used the bathroom before I left. I didn't think it was wise to wait until I got home after having a couple of drinks. I walked through the crowd towards the door of the bar feeling a little dizzy and lightheaded.
The champagne hit me weird. I did knock back that last glass fairly quickly so I could make my escape. Now it's completely gone to my head and I feel so out of it.
I left the bar and stepped outside, the cool nights breeze caused me to feel worse again. There were people around chatting while having a cigarette and a drink.
I pulled my phone from my purse and looked at the screen with blurry eyes. I felt weird, like I could fall asleep right now and sleep for days and I found it hard to focus on what was going on.
"Are you okay, Vanessa?"I heard a man's voice say. I recognised his voice, it was the man that I was chatting with by the bar. He followed me out here.
"I think I drank too much. I need to lie down."I replied and walked a few steps. I realised that I wasn't capable of walking so I rested against the wall.
He followed after me."Why don't I take you back to your place, I'm parked just around the corner." He had his hands on me, rubbing my skin and causing me to shiver.
"No, I'm okay. I'll get a taxi."I whispered.
"Come on, It's not safe to get a taxi alone when you're like this. You're drunk, you're not even able to walk. I'll get you home safe and sound."I felt his breath on my cheek and his aftershave that was unfamiliar to me.
He was touching me, trying to pick me up in his arms."No..."I said with all my might. As much as I willed my eyes to stay open — they wouldn't.
Suddenly I heard a thud and his body was on the ground in front of my feet. What's going on? My legs started to buckle from under me and I found myself in the arms of someone strong.
In and out of consciousness I could faintly hear a conversation from behind as we started to move. "He's out cold -- we're taking care of him. We'll be back soon."
JEREMY I was sitting alone on the stairs mulling over my choice to bring her here when I noticed the headlights of Sebastian's car through the panes of glass on the front door. Immediately I felt an enormous lump in my throat. They're here — She's here... I stood up and walked towards the door, but the hesitation set in the second my hand touched the handle. I wasn't ready to see her, even after all these months apart. Tonight a situation arose and she needed help, she's here now whether I'm ready or not.I opened the door and saw Noah my security lift her body from the car and carry her towards me. Sebastian followed behind him."Where did you want me to put her down, Mr Austin?"She was unconscious in his arms, with her head rested on his shoulder and her hair over her face. Noah was trying to keep her decency but it was impossible to stop her short black dress from riding up and exposing her ass. "Upstairs, The second bedroom."Sebastian stopped beside me and watched Noah carry h
VANESSAMy eyes fluttered open...And the first thing I saw was the picture of the doll with the crazy eyes standing upright against the dresser to my right. If I wasn't feeling so shitty it would probably bring a smile to my face.I remember fainting, but I don't recall much after that. What I do remember is him catching me and carrying me back to his car. If I wasn't feeling so bad I would've been adamant about being in the same vehicle as him...And about being back in this house. I turned on my side, looked up at the ceiling and released a long yawn, even though I'd slept the whole day through. I was feeling as though I hadn't slept at all."How are you feeling?"I heard his voice and shot upright in the bed with a fright. I thought I was alone, but apparently, I was wrong. Jeremy was sitting on the armchair in the corner looking worse for wear."What are you doing?"I asked as I held the sheet against my chest. I was still wearing my dress, but I felt uncomfortable being alone wi
VANESSAI wiped the tears from my cheeks before walking into the station. Before I pulled open the door I saw my reflection in the glass, my eyes red and puffy from crying. There's nothing I can really do about that now. It took me 30 minutes of standing outside the building before I could handle coming in. I was crying all the way here, the long walk from the Austin Estate and even after that I couldn't hold it together. I walked towards the desk and the officer behind it was looking at me as I approached."What can I do for you, Miss?"Here goes... This is the moment of truth — Jeremy Austin is going to get what's coming to him after what he did to my family."I need to report a crime."I wanted so badly to scream it from the rooftops, to tell everyone what he did and for him to be judged and treated badly for it. I didn't want him hurt physically -- but on the inside. I wanted him to feel pain just like I was. An hour of interrogation later and I was starting to get angry. Reporti
VANESSA"Why didn't you tell me that you were married, Vanessa?"Colin asked, bombarding me with questions as we walked down the sidewalk. He was eager for information on my past, but I was expecting it. I've been avoiding him for over a week. I knew I couldn't do it forever. "It wasn't something that I wanted to talk about. Would you of stayed clear of me if you knew that I had a husband?"I asked. "No."He admitted."Even if I wanted to, I don't think I could've done that. You're separated right — you're not getting back together or anything?""I'm on the way to my divorce hearing — what do you think. I have no interest in getting back with him. The sooner this is done the better.""He looked like he was pissed that I was there. I'm guessing he's the one that hurt you."Colin shook his head."He's an idiot for doing what he did to you — whatever it was."Jeremy had no right to be pissed, especially with the reason why we broke up. He should be afraid to even talk to me after what he did
VANESSAIt felt weird — waking up beside someone else after months of waking up alone. For a while it was Jeremy, I told myself that after him I wouldn't allow anyone to get that close to me again. But this was unavoidable really.I had no money for a hotel and I didn't want to ask my friends. Natasha and Ollie are living together all loved up, which is cute but I don't want to witness it 24/7. Alex lives in a studio apartment that's too small to even stretch your legs in. I'd rather pass on that. Colin asked me to stay, which is actually better so I can keep an eye on my apartment. It's two days in and my landlord has yet to get someone in to replace my door. My skin prickled with goosebumps as Colin's finger moved down the centre of my back. That little feeling of excitement had me biting my bottom lip. It was just another day in my shitty little life."Are you awake?"He asked and I turned my head around and looked at him. The sheet was at Colin's waist and he was topless with his
VANESSAI stood in the kitchen watching him from afar, keeping my distance and mulling my thoughts about him being here. Is this a mistake? I didn't really have a choice in the matter. Colin was decent enough to allow Jeremy to sleep on his couch for the night, not that Jeremy was sober enough to even realise it. I wanted to call Sebastian to come pick him up and bring him back home, but Jeremy's phone was totally dead and I didn't have the number.Now he's here... and it's completely awkward. I'm awkward -- me and Colin together are awkward. I'm sure things are going to get a lot worse when Jeremy is conscious. Colin walked out of the bedroom and towards the kitchen area."I brought him a blanket in case he gets cold.""Thank you."I took the blanket from him and folded it neatly."Thank you for doing this, you didn't have to. I just didn't know who else to call.""Well you needed me, I couldn't say no. What about his parents, why didn't you call them for help?"He asked. "I couldn't
VANESSAI poured hot water into mixed matched cups for coffee and tea. My hands were trembling, but I wasn't sure if it was because of what happened with Jeremy thirty minutes ago or because of our unexpected guest. I wasn't expecting this — nor was I ready for it. Today has been a weird one and it has yet to hit 3 pm. Why is my life so screwed up? I feel like the only choice I've ever had in my control was leaving Jeremy. Everything else just spirals. Colin joined me in the kitchen"I'm so sorry about this. I didn't know that she was coming over."He whispered so he wasn't overheard. "It's okay — I don't mind."I mustered a smile. Mustered because I don't know exactly how I felt about this yet. I didn't expect to come back to find a guest."Do you want to help me bring these over?""Yeah sure."He picked up the tray of coffee cups to carry to the living area."By the way, my mother can be a little much sometimes. I'll make it up to you later."Colin winked at me and walked away. That's
Today is the day!!I've never been so excited about lifting heavy boxes in my life. I couldn't sleep last night because I was so excited about moving into my new apartment.. the new apartment that Jeremy helped me get... but still. I'm glad to finally be living somewhere with hot water and a door. I removed my cherished items from their bubble wrap and set them on the side table. Taking centre stage on the sideboard in the living area was an ornament of a couple in love, holding hands in mitz of a dance. It belonged to my parents and it was my favourite.I hope I'm happy here. It's been a long time since I've actually been excited about something. Alex walked into the open concept living space and set a box on the floor."I didn't think you had this much stuff, Lovely. How did you fit it all in that tiny apartment?""I'm just very good at organising."I chuckled. "You made good use out of a small space. That's a skill in my opinion." said Natasha."This apartment is gorgeous. It's so
VANESSA"I'll be back soon."I told him and kissed him before leaving his hospital room. As I walked the corridor my phone buzzed with incoming texts into the group chat between Alex, Natasha and I. "How is the patient?"Alex asked. He's checking up on me for the third time since he left me earlier. "The patient is sick of being a patient. I'd rather be at home."I replied as I walked. Home... Where is that? It's not the apartment that I live alone in. Is it the Austin Mansion? I don't know anymore."Vanessa..."I heard Ava call me and I stopped walking and turned around. She walked towards me with a smile so I tucked my phone away to be respectful."I'll walk you back to your room, Darling.""Oh okay."I replied and we walked down the corridor towards the elevator. We talked the entire way about Jeremy and what happened to him at the opera house. By the sounds of it, she got a fright seeing her son that way. "How are you feeling... I mean really feeling?"She asked."You don't have to hi
VANESSAI SAT IN MY HOSPITAL ROOM ALONE...Thinking about what happened tonight was traumatising my mind. I was replaying it over and over again, trying to imagine what I could've done differently. What could I have done to change this outcome?I don't know!Michael is dead. Good riddance I guess. I don't know what is the correct way to feel right now, happy that he's gone maybe? I can move on with life and I don't have to worry about seeing him again. His death... The way it happened. It shouldn't have happened like that. He was on his knees, I shot him and he was down in the dirt bleeding. The police were coming... it was already over. Why did he pull that trigger? The door to my hospital room burst open and Alex rushed towards me pulling me into a tight embrace."Oh my God! Thank god you're safe. We were all so worried about you."Alex interrupted my thoughts taking me by surprise. Now I have to find the words to speak when all I wanted to do was forget."I'm okay, so survived."I
JEREMYTHE CABIN CAME INTO VIEW... It was secluded, just like I thought it would be. There were woods surrounding the cabin and they went on for miles, which meant there were no neighbouring houses to witness what was going on. No one would be close by to hear her scream for help. A car was parked out front... it could be his. MrsWatson mentioned that Bill doesn't come up here much anymore, it can't be a coincidence. The car has to be Michael's. I loaded my gun before getting out of my car which was parked a distance away from the house. I don't want him to know that I'm here before I'm ready. It's dark out so I call that an advantage. He won't see me coming. He probably thinks that I'm out of the way. I walked towards the house and noticed the front door was open wide. A million things were running through my mind but I tried not to get carried away. I walked into the house with my gun out ready to use it. In the living area, there was a fire burning low and a kitchen chair had
JEREMY"He wasn't familiar, the police think it might've been the landlord. Maybe he was looking for rent money and Michael didn't have it... I don't know."I said as my father listened on the other end of the phone that was on speaker as I drove. "Michael is clearly a very dangerous human being. The only comfort we have here is that he cares for Vanessa, I don't think he will harm her."My father replied. He was trying to be positive because he knows that I'm fucking losing my mind right now. He knows the man I am, especially when it comes to her. I didn't see a positive in this situation... Not when she's not with me. I was supposed to keep her safe and I failed. "I've been getting calls of condolences all day because of the fake news all over the internet. People think that you're dead, Son. But maybe it will work out in your favour, Michael won't be expecting you to be looking for her.""Maybe... I don't know."I pulled my car up outside the house and turned the engine off. "Eve
MICHAELI COULD SENSE HER FEAR...Vanessa doesn't understand where I'm coming from, she doesn't understand how important she is to me. That my life would be nothing without her in it.She's scared of me now, but I had to do what I did. Everything I've done... I've done for her, so we can be together. I was willing to go the extra mile to make sure that she's in my arms and not his.She needs to know everything about me... the things that I keep buried deep down inside. I need her to realise that I'll do everything I can to keep her safe. Everything..! "When my mother died I knew that it was coming, I expected to feel a certain way, Lost or perhaps an overwhelming feeling of sadness like I never felt before. But that's not what I felt. I felt relieved."She gave me a look, judging me for my words just like I knew she would. But wait for it... Because what I tell her next will bring me sympathy, and perhaps if I'm lucky I will gain a little trust."I felt relieved to have her out of m
VANESSATHE BEDROOM DOOR OPENED...The light came in from the hallway and it hurt my eyes to look in that direction. It felt as though I have been in darkness for days, but I knew that it had only been a matter of hours. Michael walked into the room and stood in front of me. His tall figure towered over me as he extended his hand out with what looked like fresh clothes. I was still sitting on the bedroom floor with my cut knees against my chest, still dressed in red from the night before. "I brought some fresh clothes for you."He said softly but I continued to look away."Why don't you clean up in the bathroom... when you're done we can talk in the living room. It's warmer in there."I took the clothes from him and stood from the floor. I was more nervous around Michael now, than I've ever been. Now I know what he's capable of and he's worse than I'd ever imagined. Michael unlocked the door to the on-suite bathroom in my bedroom and I walked inside."I can wait right here until you
VANESSAMY EYES FLUTTERED OPEN...Darkness surrounded me and it escalated my fear. I was laying on my back with not enough room to outstretch my arm. I already knew that I was in the booth of a car. We were moving, but there was quietness like it was a dirt road with no traffic. Where am I?What the fuck happened?I was at the ballet and Jeremy and I fought afterwards. After that, I went to the reception area and mingled with everyone I knew. I didn't have a drink... If Jeremy decided he wanted to talk I didn't want to be intoxicated for the conversation. He wouldn't appreciate that and I didn't want to anger him more.But he had already left... he was too angry with me to stick around. He thought that I was going to up and leave him, it looked like it maybe, but I just needed time to figure it out. What else, Vanessa?Natasha and Ollie... I remember them. I didn't want to be caught in conversation with him nor her so I escaped to the bathroom. The hallway... it was quiet... MICHAE
VANESSABackstage at the War Memorial Opera House, I was feeling a little anxious, just like I always am before a performance. I have no reason to be, our performance was perfected without a single mistake and ballet dancing is second nature to me. Despite that, I had a pit in my stomach... a fear of tonight not going like I hoped it would. Perhaps it's because Jeremy is coming and our relationship is a little frayed at the moment. I don't know where we stand since the other night.I guess tonight we'll figure that out.I looked at Wesley and noticed the panic on his face."Are you feeling okay?"I asked."I'm just nervous, but I knew I would be. This one is different... it's a big deal. Talent agents from New York will be here tonight, the pressure is on. You're nervous too, Right?""Um, a little. When I'm on stage It's just me and my dance partner, I don't pay attention to the audience."I smiled a reassuring smile to comfort him."You'll do great, you don't have anything to worry abo
VANESSAI was sitting on the couch in the living area of my apartment, my body wrapped in my grey waffle throw. Fresh out of the shower I felt sick to my stomach. Alex suggested putting a movie on TV to cheer me up and to take my mind off my worries for awhile. I got through 10 minutes before turning it off. My mind was on Jeremy and what I witnessed at the hotel. The proof was right in front of me, but a part of me still found it hard to believe. I thought after everything we've been through together, he wouldn't jeopardise what we have. "Natasha is coming over tomorrow to bring me out for lunch. Do you want to come with us?"Alex asked."I'll be fun, I think we're going shopping afterwards.""I don't think that's a good idea... Natasha and I are not exactly on speaking terms at the moment."I haven't spoken to Natasha since the coffee shop a couple of days ago. Thankfully she's not pushing me and she's giving me the space that I need."What happened between you two?"Alex looked at m