The next few days pass in a haze. I see less of Niall but frequently meet and talk to Jordan. He always approaches me burdened and worried but leaves less miserable and more confident in himself. The matter of missing werewolves is still kept a secret from the packs. The only person who knows about the situation other than the families of the two alphas is me. I try all I can to help, but there is nothing much I can do. If I had shifted, I would have been able to search the woods for their scents. My seventeenth birthday is approaching fast, and the lack of communication between Niall and me makes me feel uneasy. I am beginning to doubt my future. What if Niall isn't my mate? What would happen next? Being closer than ever to Jordan does not help my frantic heart either. To take my mind off those things, I go surfing, but the fear of confronting Cole brings me back soon enough. I constantly wish he'd left with his friends. Showing him the temple was a stupid move. But I do not blame
Although at first, it seemed like a bad idea to me—and it probably was—I end up inviting Jordan out of curiosity. I want to know how he will react. The Silver Crescent pack gathers once every month at Luna's temple to celebrate Crescent night, for a blissful period filled with music, laughter, delightful food, and chaos of all kinds. My mother would be there along with my grandma, the only time the old lady ever chooses to leave her bed. Usually, I would be at the center, organizing the monthly event along with my packmates. But this time, my attention has been carried away by other concerning things. As far as I know, no one from the Blood Moon pack has attended a Crescent celebration over the last few decades. I can guess the general reaction, however, I care little about that. If the packs knew what was going on in Bellpond, they would choose to stick together. At least that is what I believe. Also, I want to spend some more time with Jordan. Being around him feels nice. I have g
I hope to find a quiet spot to spend my time sulking until I can be beside Jordan again. I drag myself away from the pair, each footstep weighing heavy. Not long after, I find myself facing my mother. I greet her with a smile but do not receive one back. Her lips are pressed together in a thin line. My eyes flicker to the old lady standing beside her. My grandmother. Judith Martin has a face that is completely wrinkled, the arch of her backbone revealing her years. The skin of her body hangs lazily over the bones, but her eyes blaze with pure anger. They seem to glow orangish-red, although that is only the reflection of a nearby fire. She seems ready to pounce at any moment now, and I am prepared. "What have you done?" She questions the beta werewolf, her voice sounding similar to thunder. "I don't know what you mean," I answer, but I think my voice sounds too small. Almost fearful. "Don't you, girl? Tell me," she demands, moving closer. One of her bony hands grabs my arm and ho
Jordan shakes his head and lowers his eyes to his feet. “I swear it's just the dress you’re wearing,” he claims. “I’ve been told that.” I want to know what he is really thinking. If I had shifted, I would sense his mood. I would have some idea if he is really being truthful. What if I am feeling all of this and none of it is genuine? And that thought has done it. It has managed to ruin the rest of my night. I move away from him, not too much for I do not want to make him feel any worse. But being too close without knowing clearly what he wants is not an option. I look at the night sky, how dark and beautiful it still is. My grandma always says she believes a Crescent night to be brighter than a full moon. It makes no sense but I know why she would say that. My thoughts linger and the words from my mouth are, “I’m not all good, Jordan. I do stupid things sometimes.” “Who doesn’t?” His tone is easy. Maybe I had expected something else. Maybe he is not looking at me to know I am
For a moment, my whole body is frozen. I try to react, to move, but it seems physically impossible. No words leave my mouth. My eyes see what is happening, but my mind refuses to believe. My heart itself seems to cease beating. Riley and Niall? Should I have known? Is that why Niall was avoiding me? It makes sense and yet everything is nonsensical. Only when I feel a hand on my shoulder do I break out of the trance. My body jerks backward as my knees buckle. But before I can fall, Jordan holds me. I look up at his face, but his eyes are looking elsewhere. I shake my head and plant my feet firmly on the ground, and a twig cracks beneath my foot, grabbing the attention of the couple. I know Niall is looking at me, but I refuse to look that way. My ears are buzzing with a strange noise. I struggle out of Jordan’s arms and run. I run through the forest, between the bare trees in the darkness as if someone is chasing me. But I want to get away, as far away from them as possible. I nee
When I finally reach home, it's already past midnight. I don't bother to find my mother. However, on my way to my bedroom, I stop by to check on my grandma. She's sleeping quietly. I'll apologize to her first thing in the morning. Even if I don't fully mean it. Shutting the door close, I walk to my bed, my ears still buzzing with a noise. It's all a part of the transition. I realize I'm breathing faster now. And my body feels warm all over despite the cruel cold of the winter outside. Sitting on the bed, I hug my knees and close my eyes. When the picture of Niall and Riley kissing flashes across my eyes, I open them abruptly. I try to understand how that makes me feel. It's an incomprehensible, strange feeling. My heart no longer aches. It's like feeling nothing; a numbness that echoes in my chest. Does it mean that Niall isn't my mate? "Goddess, help me!" I whisper. My mind is drowning in confusion. I feel tired and buzzed at the same time. Looking back at my memories of the ni
Ruth looks at me strangely, almost sympathetically, but before she can answer my question, the doorbell rings. “I’ll get that. Nessa, we’ll talk about this later,” she assures me and leaves my room. A while later, I hear a pair of footsteps walking towards my room. Thanks to my improved hearing, I hear the voices of the people they belong to. The very people I hoped to avoid. At least until my mind clears up. I open my window, look around, and find Niall’s car parked in the front yard. Sucking in a breath, I jump out and land firmly on my feet. Looking back at the window to my room, I smile at myself in satisfaction. The buzzing in my ears fades as I jog to the hotel. The sky is clear today, and the air feels warmer, like summer. Being seventeen feels odd. I can’t figure out what exactly I feel. I’ve heard of some people who have changed a lot after their transition, not in terms of physical appearance, but mainly how they behave and the way they look at things around them. I wond
In school, I have two birthday cakes waiting for me; one from my packmates and the other from Niall. I pretend everything is alright. The world does not need to know what happened. Although I know they will find out soon. I receive flowers from my pack. Blooming fresh purple irises. It is a ritual to give those flowers to anyone who has turned seventeen and is to shift for the first time. I have dreamt of it all my childhood. I have seen the irises in the vases around my house; these belong to my mother. My grandmother, however, has chosen to decorate her room walls with the flowers she has received. These flowers are said to be blessed by the Luna and only wilt when the werewolf they were given to dies. Riley is nowhere to be seen. I feel disappointed about that but I am not really upset. I want to get away as soon as I can. My eyes look for Jordan among the crowd but after what happened at the Crescent Night, the alpha seems to want to keep distance between us, at least when we ar