I have been spending most days in my room. Miss. Davis told me that Zealand is coming to visit me. She isn't sure when but she knows he is coming now that I'm awake, he wants to speak to me. I don't want to see him, but I know that it doesn't matter what I want. I don't want to go back with him.I knew me being here was too good to be true, that it wouldn't last. I become nervous. I can't go back, I just can't. Tears begin to feel in my eyes, I then hear a knock at my door. I become terrified, my breath becomes heavy, I begin to panic, I look around the room trying to find a place I can hide.I begin to scramble, tripping over things in my room and falling to the floor. I then put my head up, looking around. I then scoot myself under the bed. Into Hiding, I slow my breathing trying not to make a sound. My body stiffens as I try not to move.I watch as the door opens. I close my eyes, not wanting to watch him become closer to me. I feel my body jump with every step he takes. Terrified
I allow myself to let all my frustration out. I take a deep breath over and over until I finally feel relaxed. I get up from the floor and walk into the bathroom. I turn on the faucet to the sink to let the water warm. Once it is warm, I wet my wash cloth. I wash my face, getting rid of all my tears. Getting ready to face whatever is next. I don't wait for Miss Davis to come back to my room. I unlock the door and head downstairs. I'm done being told what I'm going to do. It's time I say what I want. If I'm going to have any kind of happiness, I need to gain some kind of control.I see my father and I walk up to him. I'm not sure what I'm going to say, but I need to be stern. If I'm going to gain any control of my life. So, here I go I can do this, I take a deep breath" Styrell we have to talk.”“I'm not in the mood right now, Stella, It is going to have to wait.”“No it can't wait, I want to talk to you and I want to talk to you now.”I come close to him with a stern stance, showing
I hear a knock at my door, I don't want to answer it, not wanting to talk to Miss Davis. I try to ignore, but she won't stop knocking. I become irritated and decide to open my door, but when I see who is knocking my face begins to turn red. “Hello Stella, how are you this morning?”Oh, god it's him, I don't even know what to say I'm so surprised he is knocking at my door he is so sexy. That I'm lost for words, I'm like mute and I can't speak. So instead of talking, I wave like an idiot.He moves me aside and walks into my room. All I can think is oh my God, he is my room. All I see is mess. I become embarrassed, he's going to think I'm a hog for not cleaning my room. He then plops onto my bed, “Wow your bed is super comfy.”He begins to bounce on it and he looks at me and smiles, “and it's quiet no one will hear us.”“Wait what are you talking about, I'm not the type that will just have a sec with someone.”“Oh, so you are just the type that likes to play with herself in public.”Fu
It is so quiet, I'm not sure how to start the conversation. I want to say something, but when I finally find the words. They begin to bring the breakfast and words escape me. My God, it smells so good. I begin to eat what am I going to say I want to be strict but about what? I don't really want to go back to school. I don't even know why I said that. I know I need to stand my ground, but about what?I want to know about what is going to happen to me. Why am I here? Is he going to teach me anything? I've learned nothing so far, and I think it's about time that I learn something, even if it's just knowing my existence. Right before I go to open my mouth, Styrell speaks up. “Stella, I'm glad that you came down for breakfast willingly.”I look up at him not sure what to say back, so I just say “thank you”“So we finally have a chance to talk about things that are about to change. I have been getting things prepared for you. It's time for your training to start.”“My training, what train
I have been training for a week I suck . I'm trying so hard but I don't feel like I am improving at all. I have bruises all over my body. Asher does not take it easy on me at all. He gets so angry when I don't do what he expects of me. He thinks that I don't even try. All I have been doing is trying. I'm starting to think that I'm just not cut out to be any type of warrior. I have no idea how he expects that I will ever defeat Zealand. It's going to be nearly impossible for me to do. I am just not strong enough, I can't over power Asher in any way. So, I know I have no chance at all against Zealand. I don't want to be negative, I want to improve, but I just don't know how. I need to figure out how to do better, I just don't know. Asher wants me to accept my wolf, he says that it would be easier for me, but I tell him I won't become a monster. He gets so irritated with me when I refuse. Then he is even rougher than what he was to begin with. So, I have even more trouble. I need to fi
Now that I have finally done something right. I feel good. Not as worthless as I did yesterday. As I'm opening the door to my bedroom. A feeling overcomes me, a feeling that I'm not used to feeling. I'm unsure of what the feeling is. But it's something I could get used to feeling. It feels so good.I then realize the feeling is confidence. Shocked at how good it felt. Knowing I have never had any confidence in my life because I have never felt this good ever. This feeling isn't something I would forget. I then open my bedroom door so I can go and eat some breakfast. As I'm walking I realize I am walking with my head held up not looking to the floor but in front of me. Knowing I am strong and not afraid, ready for what The day will bring.Once I made it into the dining room. I see my father and Asher in conversation. Once they see me entering they stop their conversation and stand. I'm confused why would they stop what they're doing to praise me? Once I make it to my seat I sit in m
I was going to look for Ms. Davis, but I changed my mind, just my mind, what is the point? I don't have the time I need to get ready to train. As I get up from the dining room table, I watch as my father and Asher stand up. “I hear my father's deep tone, where are you going, Stella?”“I am all finished eating, I was going to go get changed, so I'm ready to train.”“You already had your training this morning, and you did quite well, I'm very proud if I may add.”I shouldn't be surprised, but I am, I'd never had anyone tell me that they're proud of me. I don't need his reassurance, but I can't lie, it did make me feel good. That he made it known that he is proud of me. Even though I'm not doing it for him, I'm doing it for myself. It's nice that he's noticing me.My father knocks me out of my daydreaming When he yells my name, “Stella.”“Yes”“I thought you could take a break today from training and maybe walk the grounds.”“Why do I need to walk the grounds? I'm not even really sure o
I finally get to come out, I hate to do this, but I have know other choice. I force her down to her knees as the shifting process begins. I hate to cause her pain, but I have no other choice. If I want to come out, it's the only time I can. So, I'm not wasting any more time. She has to shift in the woods, so I can take full control of us. If I didn't force us to shift, then she would have a shift in a cage, she would have been able to take all the control back. There is so much she needs to learn about who she is. I just hope that she accepts who she is sooner than later. She has no idea how strong she is. I feel arms on my shoulder. I knock him down and put my front paws on his chest. Once I look into his eyes, I know he's not there to hurt me, but to make sure we are okay.Instead, I don't give him any time to react to me. I take off, not wanting to hurt him. It is hard for me to resist not having my human side to control my aggression. I run as fast as I can, wanting to get away f
I have been running for days and I couldn't feel any better than what I do right now. I am so full of energy, not understanding why Because I have not rested. I have passed people but have not stopped trying to get as far away as I possibly can. I move so fast that they don't even notice that I am around. Which I find amusing.As I got further away, my surroundings became nicer. Where Zealand ruled, there was so much suffering, all you felt was dread. That is why I can understand why the humans attacked the wolves, they were so cruel to the humans. I want to find a place where everyone is equal.Phoenix has been quiet since we left our mates. I can feel her heartbreak. I just hope she forgives me, but it was what needed to be done. I would do it again. I have no regrets about leaving. This is what we needed to do to be free. I know that she knows we did what we had to do.I start to slow down as I see something so beautiful. I shift back to my human and I walk to the glimpse of light
We are almost where we need to be, he says. For some reason, everything just looks familiar. I started to become nervous. Why do I know this place? As we got up from the hill, I saw the house. I then know exactly where I'm at.I stopped dead in my tracks, and I looked at, “Axel, why are we here?”“Your father wanted me to bring you home.”“Zealand will find me here. I can't stay here.”“Stella, your father has a plan we can't keep running. We need to rest. Why not hear what your father's plans are? Then we will go from there.”“What if Zeeland comes? What are we going to do then.”“He does not know that we are. We will hide, and if we need to, we will fight.”I look at him with concern on my face. I'm not sure what to say to him. I want to run away from this place as far as I can get. I don't want to take any chance of Zealand finding me. I don't want to go back with him. My father never stopped him from taking me before. Why will this time be any different? I can't take the chance of
I barely got any rest, I was too nervous to fall into a deep sleep, scared that something would happen to Axel while I was asleep. I know that I need the rest, but it's impossible. Last night things were so quiet, and it made me more nervous than ever.Usually, the nights are full of screams and cries. I'm not sure what is happening, it's just too quiet, but I know that we need to get moving. Just in case something bad is about to take place. My entire body is hurting, but there is no time to rest any longer. I need to get out of this tree. I go to crawl down the tree, but my foot slips. My body slams against the tree as the bark tears through my flesh. I try to catch myself, but all the branches I grab a hold of break. Knowing I'm not going to be able to stop myself from falling out of the tree. I just hope that I don't break anything. I just close my eyes at this point and wait for the ground.I try not to tense and prepare for pain, but instead of feeling pain I feel strong arms w
We have been walking for days, Axel has a friend that he can trust that has a safe place. I don't know how I feel about leaving so many behind. But knowing there's nothing I can do just yet. I try so hard not to look around, so I don't see all the suffering around me. I try to walk off the path, but Axel leads us right back on.My body is so exhausted, I'm not sure how much more I can take. I need to rest if I don't get sleep soon. I might just start to sleepwalk. “Axel, I'm exhausted. I need to rest, please can we find a place to sleep."“Stella there is no time to rest, we need to keep moving to get to where we are going.”“Axel, I'm not going to be able to continue very much longer. We need to find a place to set camp for the night.”“Fine, we will go over in the wooded area, so we are somewhat hidden. We will slowly steer ourselves away.”I watch as we are walking, I follow as he heads to the woods. Trying not to have too many to notice us heading to the woods. It is hard not to b
I have never known what happiness was until now. Phoenix has wanted me to shift to go for a run. I just don't know how, as she tries to help but nothing works. Phoenix says that I won't shift on my own until I want it. I feel that I want it, but I guess it's not enough.Axel has been so wonderful, he makes me go crazy. I try so hard to resist him, but it is so hard to stay away. He doesn't want to leave this place. The fear of him losing me is too great. Especially when I'm unable to shift just yet. But I can't help but think about my father and wonder if he is ok. I know things have been odd between my father and me. But a part of me still wants to get to know more about him. The mate bond is strong, but I can't let it control the choices I make. I need to make sure that my father is okay. So, I need to tell Axel that it is time to go find him.I don't want to upset Axel, but I need to be honest with him. He needs to know how I'm feeling. I don't ever want to blame him for anything.
I can't believe what I did, it was like I had no control, I couldn't help myself. The whole point of being a werewolf was for me to gain control. “Stella, that is what is supposed to happen between mates, usually both consistent. It was just harder for you to control yourself just yet, but you will with time.” It has been hours, why hasn't he woken up? What if he never wakes up? Oh my God, what if I killed him? “Stella stop, you are going to make yourself crazy, why don't we go for a run to help calm your nerves.” No, I want to be here when he wakes up, I don't want him to wake up alone. I need to explain what happened, I hope that he doesn't hate me.” He's not going to hate you, he will be pleased that he gained your mark.” I hear a loud gasp for air, when I turn around, I see Axel sitting straight up in bed. I'm So happy to see that he is awake. I run over to him, wanting to jump into his arms, but I'm scared that he is going to hurt me because of what I did to him. So, I stop at
I'm so confused about what just happened. Why wouldn't he want me to give him pleasure? Why would he want nothing in return? I want to understand him. He is so different from anyone I have ever met before. I just look away from him, not wanting him To see my confusion. As I hear the floor creaking, I look just to watch him walk out of the bedroom. I get out of bed and head to the bathroom. I shut the bathroom door. I then turn to the shower, open the curtain and turn on the water letting the water warm. As I turn around, I see a mirror. I look into the mirror, I don't see any bruises, my lips aren't swollen. All I see is me, I can see the person that's looking back at me. I am no longer broken. I am strong but am I. I know that I need to find my father. I need to make sure he's OK. But am I strong enough to reach him? Then I hear a faint voice, You are strong enough, especially when we're together. We can do anything, I promise you. I look around the room wondering where Axel is bu
As I'm waking up, a smile comes across my face, I'm happy. I sit up in bed so fast that it makes me dizzy. Not even realizing that Axel is lying right beside me. I freeze, not wanting to wake him. I slowly lay back down on my side.I can't help but stare at him. He is so sexy even when he is sleeping. I can feel myself wanting him, but knowing I need not let him know how I feel. I don't want him to think that I'm so easy to fall for someone so fast.He begins to move as his arms wraps around me. He pushes me into his chest and holds me. I don't know what to do. My body relaxes and I want nothing more than to be wrapped in his arms. I'm frozen, I have never felt this good before.No one has ever held me the way that he is holding me. I could just get lost in this feeling. But knowing he is going to wake up and let me go. I don't want him to let go of me, I want this feeling to last forever. Is this the bond that I have been told about between mates? Or is this feeling actually coming
I look at him with a stern face, wanting him to take me seriously. But when I saw his brown eyes looking into mine, I began to smirk. He then smiles at me, “what are your terms?”I cough to clear my throat and begin to speak, “I want to have total control over myself, I don't want to be controlled at all. Your advice is always welcomed, but only I make all the choices that involve me.”“No putting your hands on me unless I want them on me.”“Also, I need us to go check on my father and let him know what is happening, so he knows that I'm okay and that I have escaped Zealand for good.”“I can do the first 2 but the last one I won't be able to do the. It's too dangerous to go back there right now, but maybe in a couple of weeks when things slow down we can.”“I need to make sure that they are okay. When Zealand sees I'm gone, he will go after them.”“Zealand won't be going after anyone, he is hiding like the coward he is.”“Wait, he is the king, he is supposed to fight for his kind and