Chapter 9

The thought of being a slave doesn’t sound appealing at all. I can’t believe that werewolves choose to do this willingly. I’m driving angry. I need to slow down. Ava stares out the window with her headphones on. I don’t want to be a pack slave if that really means I’d just be passed around. Sounds more like I’d just be the pack slut. I’m sure some girls would kill for that. Not me.

Ava says I could be her slave, but would the pack be okay with that? Would they cut me a break and just allow me to be at the hands of the gamma. What if the Alpha doesn’t approve of me? Lots of questions are running through my head and I need them to be answered but I’m not even sure I’d get the whole truth out of Ava. There’s something about her that just seems so selfish.

I’m head over heels for her, but I fear that she’s not exactly who she says she is. Or maybe that’s just how I feel because I have major trust issues. It’s probably because she can hear everything I’m thinking, and I can’t hear her at all. I’m doubting everything right now.

I’ve always wanted to see the Hollywood sign. The view of Los Angeles from the highway is not what I expected. It looks like New York City with palm trees. Maybe I should just turn around.

I wish my grandmother was still alive. She’d tell me what to do. My logical brain is telling me to go home. But what is home? An empty house where my grandmother raised me? The place where my mother died? The town that knew of The Harlow Witches and their murders. I can’t fucking go back there.

Especially not after what I’ve done and who I’ve become.

“Ava?” I try to wake her. “Ava I don’t know which way I’m going here.” She wakes up. Ava pulls her headphones off. “Aster we’re so close. You’re gonna take exit 27 B to Topanga Canyon Boulevard.” She points ahead. I pull off the next exit and drive through a heavily congested area. Nothing about this area seems glamorous. “Just keep driving Aster, you’ll see. Topanga Canyon is great.” I take her word for it. My heart is racing.

The sun is hanging low over the Santa Monica mountains. “Slow down a little bit. These roads have fast curves.” Something about what she said makes me smile. I was not expecting Cali to feel so rural. There’s a lot of residential properties tucked into the hills. I thought there would be more shops and streets full of celebrities. “We’re not in L.A. It’s pretty chill out this way.” Ava says.

My anxiety is getting the best of me. I pull off at the Top of Topanga Overlook area. Ava and I get out of the car. “You okay?” She asks. I put my foot up on a rock, “Yeah. I just need to stretch my legs.” I walk over to the picnic table that overlooks the city. What I really need is a tarot card.

My hands shuffle the Queen of Pentacles along with the Justice card in reverse. The queen is on a mountain top with panoramic views of the land and sea. I feel like this card is my mother saying hello. She worked hard to provide for us before her untimely death. Justice was never served. In my heart I know that she was murdered. Nobody came forward to tell the truth. I want nothing more than to find this vile liar and tear them to shreds.

Ava looks out at the city. I put my cards back into my pocket. “Whatever path I’m heading down is meant to be.” She holds my hand, “You’re in good hands.” She says to me with confidence and a smile that sets my soul at ease. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous.” She laughs, “If you weren’t nervous I’d be worried. Just try to stay calm. The pack can be intimidating. So let me do all the talking. Okay?” I guess I trust her enough, “Alright.” I say.

I feel like I’m watching my life change right before my eyes. I’m transitioning so fast that I almost forgot about my powers. I crouch down and hover my hand over the ground. A mini dirt devil forms with purple and pink energy circling around. I raise my hand up slowly to reveal a green rose with purple thorns.

Ava is in awe. “Thank you for helping me.” I say and hand her the flower. She takes it and looks deep into it’s center. “Of course.” Her nose wrinkles. “Why is it green?” She wonders. “Because that’s what your energy created.” I tuck her hair behind her ear and lean in to kiss her. Ava raises her hand to stop me. “I don’t like your magic.” She says to me. “Well I don’t like that I can’t hear what you’re thinking. I guess we’re even.” I steal that kiss but she doesn’t kiss back.

Something doesn’t feel right. “What is it Ava? What are you not telling me?” She’s holding back. “Werewolves can be unpredictable. They don’t know their strength. You should keep your magic a secret.” Why would I want to do that? “If I become a slave to them, wouldn’t I want to be able to protect myself?” Ava shakes her head, “No. They won’t understand you and they will hurt you.”

So I can’t use my magic. I shouldn’t speak and I know nothing about werewolves let alone this pack and their history. “Why does it feel like I’m getting myself into a situation that I won’t be able to get myself out of?” Ava holds my face with her hand, “I will always fight to keep you safe Aster. You have my word on that.” I want to believe that’s enough, but I’m not sure it is.

The way I see it is that I have two choices here. Run like hell or run into hell. My itchy feet are getting cold but my intuition is telling me to stick it out. There’s something in me that knows I need to see this through.

I must join the pack.