PaigeI folded my legs underneath me on Lauren’s bright blue couch and scratched Francis’s head. It felt like I hadn’t been here in a month, but I’d only missed one session.“So, London?” Lauren said.“And Paris,” I replied. “For a night.”She hummed. “How was it?”“It was—” The answer caught in my throat, too bulky to possibly escape. One word, a sentence, a whole therapy session couldn’t sum up how it had been. It had been everything and nothing at all. My whole world was different, and I didn’t know if anything had changed.“Fair enough.” She smiled. “Let’s start smaller. You saw McKenna, right?”“I did.” I sank my fingers deeper into Francis’s fur. “And she seemed good. I mean, not good. She looked like someone had run her through a woodchipper. But”—I shook my head—“she seemed good with everything?”Lauren frowned. “What does that mean?”“Like, she wouldn’t stop talking about it.” I shrugged. “And always with the same excitement she had when saying hi or talking about her family.
Tommaso“Do we have time to grab lunch somewhere we can actually sit down?” Paige asked.I glanced at my watch. I needed to get documents in order for a shipment going out tonight. I was looking into new arms dealers to pick up Tony’s orders once we took him down, and Stan was coming over for a strategy meeting at 2:00.“Of course,” I said.She grinned. She couldn’t know just how much I had going on right now.***After a bit of discussion in the car, we ended up at a sushi place I’d always loved. The hostess offered us a corner booth, and we sat.“I’ve never actually had sushi before,” Paige admitted. “I don’t know if I’ve ever had fish that wasn’t breaded and fried.”I laughed. “Then we’ll skip the stuff that’s still alive and tries to crawl back out.”Paige’s mouth fell open. “You’re joking.”“Nope.” I turned over my menu with a smile.“We’re doing that someday.” She squared her shoulders. “I have to know.”“For now, let’s—”At a table in the middle of the room, a couple began argu
PaigeBeth sat in the backseat of Tom’s car, sniffling and fiddling with the receipt I’d given her with my number on it. She’d asked to be taken to her mother’s house, and the pressure in my lungs had finally released. Laying out Steve felt great, but only leaving Beth with my number hadn’t felt like nearly enough. This was much, much better.“Mom warned me, you know,” Beth said. “She said Steve was trouble, that he was the exact same kind of guy as her third husband, who ended up in prison. But I didn’t li-i-sten!” Beth dissolved into tears.I reached back and patted her knee. I’d never really known what to do with tears, but I knew the feeling that everything bad that happened to you was your fault.“You’re listening now,” I said.Beth sucked in a deep breath. “Am I? Steve’s the only guy who’s ever gonna love me. I’m damaged goods now.”“No,” I said with surprising vehemence. “Steve was a fucking liar.”Beth shook her head. “He was the only one who told me how annoying my laugh was,
TommasoAfter Stan left, I opened up my document on the great search for a new arms dealer to fill Tony’s slot. Treating his removal like a foregone conclusion made waiting for whatever the hell he was going to get back to me a little easier. I still had more than enough to worry about in terms of day-to-day operations, but Tony filled my brain whenever I sat down at my desk. Tony, and that bastard Zahur.I rubbed my face and leaned back as Steve’s face floated into my mind. I could take him out while I was at it. Make sure Beth never went back to him. But if Paige hadn’t actually gotten through to her, Beth would just find another Steve.I thought she had, though. Paige had been a fucking miracle today. Beautiful and strong, even when Beth started talking about exactly how Steve had hurt her. And the way she kissed me—My phone rang, and I grabbed it. It was an unknown number. I stood and answered the call.“Tommaso?” Tony said on the other end.I grinned. “Speaking. What can I do fo
TommasoMy nerves bubbled under my skin, and I fidgeted as I waited for Tony to finish his sentence on the other end of the line. If he didn’t let me see his operation, the whole plan blew up in my face. If he did, I had to figure out how not to punch his nose back into his skull long enough to actually get the information I needed.“Since you have such a history in the business, I’m willing to try things your way,” Tony said.I hopped out of my seat and punched my fist in the air. Thank God he couldn’t see me. Paige’s laughter if she could’ve seen me echoed in my mind as I forced my face into a grim expression.“I’m glad you’re coming around,” I said as severely as I could manage. The bastard had no idea he’d just walked right into my trap. Our trap.“You got time in your busy schedule this Friday?” he asked.“I could make time for this,” I replied. “I have a standing appointment in the morning I can’t miss, though.”“Don’t worry.” Tony laughed. “I’m not much of an early riser.”I ro
PaigeI looked up from my computer and discovered night had somehow fallen around me. Late night, too. Nearly one, by the clock on my computer. I rubbed my eyes. Waiting for Tony to reply to the documents was torture, and Chris had dropped a new project on my desk right before the rest of the office usually signed off for the night. Tom and I didn’t have any plans, so I’d just asked Miranda to bring dinner to my room and figured I would work until I got tired enough to fall instantly asleep.Of course, that hadn’t happened yet. I didn’t know if it would. At least I could see the light on in Tom’s office and know he was burning the midnight oil with me. Not that my tech start-up graphic design was anything like what he was probably up to downstairs. No, he was probably doing something that put his or other people’s lives on the line.Could I put up with that? Decades of knowing every time he went to work, I had to worry about whether he’d survive the day? My memories of before Dad left
PaigeHe inhaled sharply. “Okay. I have to go get pajamas.”I tightened my grasp on his hand. He’d been so far away for so long. I didn’t want him to leave the room, like he’d disappear in a puff of smoke if he did.“Or I could stay.” He glanced down at himself. “I have an undershirt, and I guess I can keep my pants on.”“You don’t have to.” My voice rasped out of my throat. I barely believed myself, but I knew that I wanted Tom to sleep, and I knew he wouldn’t in suit pants. He’d be the same man I’d come to know and love in boxers.“Okay.” His voice became husky. “And I’ll sleep…” He glanced at the couch.“In bed with me,” I finished.A knot of tension seemed to leave Tom. He smiled softly. “That works for me.”I nodded sharply and stood. “I’ll go change in the closet. You, out here.”He saluted. “Rodger!”I laughed as I wobbled into the closet where there were no mirrors, still feeling half like I was dreaming. When I stepped into the closet, I closed the door most of the way and le
TommasoI lay in Paige’s bed, feeling her naked body against mine and staring up at the ceiling. I’d meant what I said in England about being willing to wait forever, but my God, I’d be thinking about this night for the rest of my life if she changed her mind. She’d been so beautiful, so strong, and she fit me like we were made for each other. She had breasts I could spend the rest of my life between, and I could only imagine I’d feel the same between her legs when I finally got to taste her there. She moved like a fucking dream, like a million times better than I’d been dreaming, and I’d give anything to hear my name on her lips again.But I didn’t know if I’d get an again. I was fucking thrilled, but it seemed like she was moving really fast. Like everyone kept telling me to be patient, but Paige seemed to want to race ahead. And every time she did, she regretted it. I pressed a kiss to the top of her head and prayed she wouldn’t be furious with me in the morning. Or worse, disguste
PaigeI stood in the vestibule outside of the chapel, clutching my flowers, my heart hammering in my chest. Organ music belted through the doors, and I was just waiting for my cue.We all were. My two bridesmaids, in simple maroon dresses, stood ahead of me. Like she could feel my eyes, Lauren turned back and winked. I smiled. The dress looked spectacular on her, and I’d promised up and down that Tom would invite enough handsome men for her to go home with a date. This, of course, had been complicated by Tom choosing Killian and Stan as his two groomsmen. While I liked the older man, and he kept Lauren laughing, I didn’t exactly see the two of them as a couple.Mom stepped up next to me with a smile. Her mother-of-the-bride dress, a deep burgundy gown with gold accents, caught the light and sent it dancing. “Are you excited?”I inhaled sharply. “I kind of can’t stop thinking about the seating chart for the reception. Who have I become?”She laughed. “Your father.”Tears beaded in my e
KillianI sat behind my desk and looked out over my men. Tommaso took his usual seat. Adrian hovered in the corner like he wasn’t quite sure what to do with himself yet, just like he had at the beginning. Patrick was still laughing about spilling his wine. Just like old times. I stood and started pouring everyone drinks.“So,” I said, “do you have an update on the warehouses, Adrian?”He started toward my desk, then paused. An odd moment passed. It wasn’t really my desk anymore. I’d left the hunk of wood behind because I had no need for it on the island, and he’d loaded it down with computers in my absence. Despite that, I’d never seen anyone sit behind it but my father besides me.I offered Adrian a drink. “Sit.”He nodded. “Didn’t want to step on your toes. The situation is pretty simple, all told, but I can tell there’s a certain amount of grace I’m supposed to be handling this foreman with, and I don’t—”Tommaso joined me at the bar to pour. “Do you remember that foreman in the so
PaigeI tucked my arm through Tom’s and straightened my long, floral romper. He kissed me on the cheek, then knocked on the door. Joyce swung it open.“Hello!” She welcomed us both in with hugs. “Mr. and Mrs. Ricci are in the drawing room. Please, come in.”We let ourselves be bustled through the door, the wine we’d brought carried off to the kitchen, and our coats taken to some closet somewhere in the mansion. Adrian used it as a base of operations when Killian and Sera weren’t home, so I’d been here a few times since the wedding, but I’d never felt comfortable here. Finally, we were led to the closed doors of the drawing room, and Tom opened them with a smile.Inside, we found not only “Mr. and Mrs. Ricci,” but also Olivia and Patrick, Adrian and Penny—who still wouldn’t even talk about their dance at the wedding—and Sera’s mother and brother, as well as Lauren. Sera leapt up to greet us, and Killian followed a few paces behind. I threw myself into the hug just as much as Sera did—I
SeraI folded a T-shirt and put it into Killian’s suitcase. “Are you sure we need to leave so soon?”He chuckled and took the T-shirt back out, then replaced it with a suit shirt. “Very, unfortunately. Adrian is in the middle of a difficult situation with one of the warehouses, and he needs a steady hand to guide him through.”My stomach churned at the thought of leaving the villa. We’d only been here for a couple of months, and we’d promised everyone we’d return, but dammit, I wasn’t ready yet. Lazing around the villa and having sex whenever the mood took us was way too fun to stop after only a few months.“But we’ll be back soon, right?” I asked like I didn’t already know.“Cara mia.” Killian took my hands. “What is happening in that head of yours?”I sighed. “I don’t know. The thought of leaving just make me kind of sick. We just got away from all that. I don’t want to be scared again.”He studied me for a long moment. “You do look a little pale. How sick is this making you exactly
PaigeI squeezed Tom’s hand in the car on the way to the airport.“Sad to be leaving?” he asked.I smiled. “Always. It’s so magical here.”He laughed. “Not just saying that because we’ve spent most of the vacation in bed?”I ran my free hand up his leg. “No, we have weekends for that at home.”“Fair enough.” He kissed the back of my hand. “I do like going on these little vacations, though. It’s a nice escape for a few days.”I nodded. I really was going to miss Paris, but I wouldn’t have wanted to stay much longer anyway. Lauren had been texting me updates about the shelter, especially the new one as women settled in. I kept thinking about how much I was missing, how much they needed me there. And I knew Tom was feeling the same. Apparently, Lyle had his sights set on someone new, and Tom was itching to pull the trigger. Anybody else would probably think we were freaks, desperate to leave a luxury vacation to get back to our grueling jobs. But those people didn’t realize just how much
TommasoWhen I told Paige I’d set everything up for another two days in Paris, she’d immediately insisted we spend a day shopping. I put up a cursory front of complaints, but in truth, I was perfectly happy following her from store to store and carrying her bags. Even better, she loved it when I made jokes about some of the worst, frilliest, most French things we came across. She laughed and joined in. For years, I’d heard men complaining about shopping with their girlfriends—fiancées—saying it was the most boring thing in the world, but even if we weren’t laughing up a storm as we paid our way through the most expensive boutiques in Paris, I still would’ve been having a ball. The sun was shining, she kept looking at the ring I’d put on her finger with a soft wonderment I’d never seen in her eyes anymore, and my face hurt from smiling. Paige and I could’ve made a hell of an afternoon out of reading the phone book.“Stop!” she said.I froze, my free hand twitching toward the gun I’d hi
PaigeI didn’t know how long Tom and I lay there, listening to the fireworks and seeing the very top of their arcs through the sliver of windows accessible from the floor. I pillowed my head on his chest and enjoyed the steady beat of his heart. Engaged. The last time I was here, I’d been on the cusp of recovery, just starting to make strides toward the person I was today. Now, I wasn’t done—I didn’t know if there was a done for traumatized people or people in general—but I was so much better, stronger, happier than I had been.The last time Tom and I were in Paris, I’d thrown myself at him and chickened out. As much as I could stay at a private view of the Eiffel Tower, I wanted to show him just how much had changed. Just how much I meant the “yes” that had fallen so easily from my lips. I rolled on top of him.“What do you say we take this back to that hotel room you picked out?”Tom grinned and pulled me down for a kiss. I pressed myself against him, feeling every line of his body.
PaigeI sat across from Tom in an empty, stunning restaurant in the middle of the Eiffel Tower with my head spinning like the three sips of wine I’d had with the appetizer were enough to make me drunk. He’d really rented out the Eiffel Tower. And not one floor, the whole thing. We’d ridden an empty elevator, the two-Michelin-star chef kept coming out to tell us why he’d selected particular dishes based on the information Tom had given him about our preferences, and I couldn’t hear anything but the soft classical music over the speakers. It felt like a dream.Tom took my hand. “So?”“So what?” I asked.“Was the surprise worth it?” He grinned.I looked over his suit, a forest green that brought out his eyes, worn without a tie. His dark curls tumbled into his face. I’d never seen him look so perfectly put together and so casual. He looked…well, he looked exactly like the man I’d fallen in love with. Nothing like the one who’d scared me so badly all those months ago in Cairo.“I get the
TommasoDespite how much I wanted Paige to keep that little black dress on, we had a few hours before the Tower officially emptied out for our use. I talked her into putting on something a little more walkable and keeping the lingerie on. As if to punish me for my restraint, she picked a pair of tiny, wide-legged shorts that showed the tops of the garters attached to her stockings every time she moved and a fitted blouse. I changed and somehow convinced myself to leave the hotel room instead of stripping everything off her and spending the hours in bed.She took my hand as we stepped into the lobby. “I should’ve known. When you plan a surprise, it’s never just one thing. Where are we off to first?”“So nosy.” I smiled.“You’re right, I’ll stop asking.” She slid the room key out of her pocket and fiddled with it for a second, then dropped it. With a small smile, she bent at the waist to pick it up, exposing those garter straps again.I grabbed her waist and hurried her the final few st