LISTEN TO ME

“Be my mate," Samuel suggests.

His words get me off guard. I am not sure the kind of reaction my wolf shows, but I'm pretty sure it is one of sheer surprise.

Me mate with Samuel? This is just insane. We don't even like each other. Well...I guess he probably likes me due to his excessive flirting at the diner last week but I have never really thought of him that way. I just lost a mate.

My mood gets foul. Oh yeah, because of remembering my mate, my former mate.

I have temporarily forgotten about him. The hollow feeling inside my chest has started to make its appearance again.

Samuel watches me very closely, cautiously. When my eyes begin to water again, he tenses. He slowly takes a few steps toward me and places his hands on my shoulders and gently, soothingly, rubs them.

Had my wolf been present she would have protested to him touching us wholeheartedly. She still wants Logan, but the sad truth is she isn't here. She's gone. She left me, when Logan did. I am utterly alone inside.

"See, this is exactly the kind of pain that you can free yourself from. Don't make yourself suffer anymore than you have to."

He seems weak as he tells me this, like it physically pains him to say it. He is convincing himself as well and not only me. I have a feeling that he is forcing himself to move on even though that's not what he really wants. I don't think I've ever seen an Alpha so weak before. Not unless they were dying at least.

"I am physically unable to be an Alpha to my pack. I'm too weak right now to make any decisions. My Beta had to take over for me until I am able to resume my role again, whenever that may be." He pauses for a moment before continuing. "You can help me with that. We can both be normal again, and possibly even happy if we try hard enough." This time I am finally able to speak. I still have questions poking at my mind and I need them answered.

"We don't even like each other like that. I know when you flirted with me before it seemed a bit off. You were forcing yourself to do that. You were still thinking about Josephine. Weren't you?"

"I was," he agrees. "But you forget, I was rejected before you were, I've had a little time to cope."

"How long ago?" I ask.

"A month," he answers solemnly.

His hands drop from my shoulders and he takes a step back, giving each of us some room. His features still resemble depression. I honestly feel bad for him.

"I tried to kidnap her you know," he continues.

"What?"

"I tried to take her, but your Alpha stopped me. He would have most likely tried to kill me had we not been on human territory," he explains. "He might have done it today if it wasn't for the wake of recent events."

"Is that when she rejected you?" I ask.

He shakes his head. "No. It wasn't until after that when she told me she loved someone else and couldn't accept me."

"I'm sorry," I say. I really am. I feel bad that he has to go through that.

He doesn't say anything, he merely turns his head and looks out the window.

"So why me? Why not mate another she wolf?"

He turns to me again. "Because you're already broken. If I found someone else, I stand a chance of taking them away from the mate they haven't met yet. I couldn't inflict that kind of pain on another wolf."

I nod my head. I guess that is understandable. Rejected wolves are very hard to come by. It is almost unheard of.

"So basically we'd just be helping each other out," I state.

"Exactly."

I have to agree, it is better than being stuck and never moving on. We both deserve to do that at least.

"It also helps because you're meant to be a Luna," he adds "It will come as first instinct to you when you take on that role. I need someone that can help me lead a pack."

I laugh lightly. "I still can't picture myself as leading anyone. I've never been much of a leader, just independent."

"You will though," he says confidently. "I've seen it before."

Suddenly something snaps in me and I remember something.

"You know, it was pretty crazy of you to come onto our territory last week without any protection. You could have been killed."

"I know. That's why I'm not fit to be Alpha right now. I don't make good choices. I'm reckless." He says.

"Why didn't Logan kill you?" I ask. "He could have done it easily that day, but he didn't.”

I try to push the pain aside as I mention him. It is no small task. It hurts me beyond belief until I grab at my chest.

"It is probably pity. And maybe some regret for his being a part in all of this. I doubt he'll be so kind in the future. Soon, none of this will be a bother to him anymore. She'll be the only thing on his mind. Her and running his pack."

"We'll be virtually nonexistent," I whisper to myself.

Again the pain increases. I find myself needing to sit down. Samuel senses that and automatically helps me to my bed. I take a seat on the end of it, placing my hands on my knees, and hunching over them for support.

"I know this is a lot to take in, but you'll see. Things can get better for both of us."

After a moment of silence he places a hand on my back and sits down next to me. "So what do you say? Will you be my mate and put an end to both of our suffering?"

It is a tall order, but it is true, we desperately need each other. We can't get through this alone. It is too much. This can fix things and make them much better.

So why am I still holding back? Am I so scared to accept the offer he is giving me? Because I will actually have to mate with someone who is not my mate. I don't know how I can do it. My wolf would never approve of this.

But... on the other hand, if I decide to go through with it, then I will have a new mate and then she might decide to come back to me. It is worth a shot right?

It is a tough decision, but I know what I need to do. I need to do it for me. It is my only chance at some normalcy in my life.

I meet his eyes and agree with him sincerely. "Okay, I'll be your mate."

Samuel and I continue to talk about our mating and pack business for the next half hour. I express to him that I can't leave without my parents. They mean too much to me to leave them behind. They have be my constant support for my entire life. I owe them a lot.

He doesn't put up any kind of fight at my request to move them to his pack. He seems to be a firm believer in families sticking together as well. That is so comforting to know. Maybe we have some things in common after all.

At nine thirty mom comes into my room to serve me breakfast, and for the first time in a week, I actually have an appetite. Samuel doesn't stick around to meet her, afraid that she might freak out about him being there and he leaves it up to me to give my parents the news. I think it best to wait until dad is off work tonight and tell them together. That way they can make an informed decision as mates. It is my hope that they will join me in Samuel's pack, but I won't not force them. The choice is theirs and theirs alone.

"You're up," Mom says in surprise as I come bounding down the stairs. I am not sure what exactly shocks her more, the fact that I am dressed for the outside world or that I am walking around again without my head hanging to the ground.

She mutes the television and stands up from the couch.

"I'm going out," I reply, coming to a standstill in front of her.

Her face lights up into a bright smile."That's great, Grace."

"Yeah, I thought I'd go into town for a little while. I have some things to take care of."

She blinks a few times before replying. She seemed curious. "Oh?"

I avoid answering anymore questions until later tonight. After then, I'll tell her anything she wants to know.

"So, I was thinking," I start. "You and dad don't have any plans tonight do you?"

"Not that I know of, why?"

I adjust the strap on my purse and continue. "Just keep the night open for me. I'm bringing a friend over I'd like for you to meet."

This seems to excite my mother even more. I think she was going to attack me. "I'd love to meet them. What time should we expect you?"

"I'll be here as soon as dad get's off work."

She nods her head and smiles. "I'll prepare a roast."

I can already see her mind coming up with ideas about tonight. She looks more excited than I am. She lives for this kind of thing. My mother is a homemaker. She has always been the one to take care of me and the house. She has never wished for a life outside the pack. She is just content with being a mother, a wife, and a mate.

I am okay with that because that's what she wants, but for me, I want to do so much more. I want adventure, and to do exploration. I don't want to settle down for the rest of my life. Every wolf should have a little fun before they make a decision about their future.

Mom hugs me warmly for a moment before sighing and releasing me. I can still see traces of worry on her face. "I'm really glad you're better, honey. Your father and I have been so worried about you." I am not better. I am far from better. I will never be better again. Well, not without some healing at least. Right now, I am more like a band aid. The wound was is still very much underneath it, but I am finally able to cover it up now and hurt in private. They won't have to see me suffer on the outside anymore. I won't have to worry them anymore.

"Well, I should go. The day is almost half over."

"Okay," she nods. "Be careful."

I smile at her and bid her goodbye before disappearing out the door.

I meet Samuel in town at my cafe. This is something I have been dreading since our talk this morning. It is hard enough that I have to walk back into this place after what happened, but now I have to quit my job as well. One of the stipulations he has before allowing me to join the pack. He feels it is better to get as far away from Logan as possible and working here won't allow that. I will still have to see him and his mate anytime he decides to come here. Yet another thing I will have to give up for Daniel.

John sits across from us, watching Samuel with much displeasure. At this point they are both having a staring contest. It isn't until I clear my throat that they both look away.

"Are you sure you're not in some kind of trouble?" he ask me warily. I can tell by the looks he is giving Samuel that he didn't trust him. I'm only glad he doesn't know our species or trust wouldn't be the only problem we have.

"Yes," I reply. "I just think it's time for me to move on."

John is always good to me and I hate to just leave him hanging after he kept me employed for the past year, but this is necessary. I think he is more worried about me than upset about my leaving. There can't be a better employer anywhere. He made sure to always look out for me. I'd miss talking to this grey haired man. "Does this have anything to do with you passing out last week? Some young man told me about what happened after you were taken home."

I'm glad no one outside the pack knows what happened to me.

"I'm leaving because it's what I want to do. There was nothing that had any bearing on my decision," I explain. "Just want to come here and give you my notice."

His face softens a bit. "Well, I guess if it's what you want. But just know that you've always got a place here if you want to come back."

"Thank you, John," I smile.

I lean across the counter and give him a quick goodbye hug and make sure to pull away before I become too emotional over my departure. I will miss this place, but we all have to move on sometimes. It's just a part of life.

"Are you gonna be okay?" Samuel asks before we are even out of the parking lot. He has been watching me closely since my heartfelt goodbye.

"Yeah, goodbyes are always hard, that's all."

I stare out the passenger side window taking in every last thing I can about this place. It is my hometown and always will be. I grew up here. I had my first shift in the front yard of my house. I got my first boyfriend in the middle school I attended here. Memories like these don't just go away. They are a part of who I am. I just don't know what to do with them.

I feel guilty.

I am leaving behind everything I know, for a new pack life. Does it make me a bad person to feel happy about that? Maybe, but I need this. Just once I am to be a little selfish and put my happiness first. The pack can think what they want of me, I don't care. It doesn't matter that they would look down their noses at me for deserting them. I know where my pack stands on leaving the pack family, but I often wonder what they would do if it were one of them who was rejected. I don't think they would keep the same beliefs on staying then.

Samuel pulls up to my house at five o'clock just before my father arrives. I am as nervous as the day I introduced him to Dickson, my sixth grade boyfriend. He was shaking by the time he left my house that day.

My dad was a bit intimidating back then, still being a pack fighter and all. After he retired he became more like the rest of us. He hardly ever worked out anymore, apart from pack training exercises. He decided to step down when there were more young fighters stepping up in the pack. I think he felt out of place. He needed the rest anyway.

Before we enter the house I stop Samuel just before we reach the door.

"I know I've told you already, but thank you, again. I know we're just doing this to help each other, and you didn't have to, so thanks. I'd probably still be in bed wallowing in pain and self pity if you hadn't saved me."

He look at me and gives a small sigh. Not one of annoyance, but in more of understanding. "Like I said, I've been where you are. And I guess I still am. As long as we band together nothing can touch us. Things will get better. You just have to trust me."

"I'm getting there," I admit.

It is strange but I am starting trust him and it slightly scares me. I can't justify it other than he is helping me in a time of need. Deep down I know it goes beyond that, but I haven't really figured that out yet. Maybe it's just that I really want to trust him so I am. Maybe I don't have a real reasoning for it after all.

"Good," he smiles. "You'll need to learn how to do that before we can become mates. Mates need trust above all else." I agree. Suddenly something pops

in my head.

"You said someone knew you were here before. You got clearance from the pack?"

"I did," he nods but he looks remorseful.

"You talked to Logan?" I guess.

"I told him I was offering you a place with me. He didn't object."

I should say not. He is the one who let me go in the first place. I'm sure it will be much easier on him if I was gone. I won't be a constant reminder of the pain the pain he put me through.

I hope he's happy with her. I really do. I know my chances are slim anyway. He already had someone before me and I can't change that. I don't hold a grudge against him, I'm just hurt. I know one day I'll get past this and when I do, it will be a glorious day.

"Your Dad's coming," he states, listening intently at the door. "He heard us talking."

Just seconds the door opens, proving him right. He has more intensified hearing than the rest of us wolves so it isn't a surprise he hear him.

"Grace," My dad says looking between Samuel and I. "Your mom said you were brining someone over."

"Dad, this is Samuel Jackson, Alpha of highland Pack. Samuel this is my Dad."

"Nice to meet you," Dad says, dipping his head in respect.

"And I'm Grace's mom."

I hadn't even seen where my mother came from, but she is standing here in front of dad with her hand extended to Samuel with a huge grin on her face."Nice to meet you both," he smiles, taking both my parents hands.

"I have to say," dad starts while awkwardly scratching the back of his neck. "When my wife said Grace was having a friend over, I pictured someone with a little less testosterone."

I nearly laugh. Daddy is being his same old protective self. I can tell he is less than pleased to see a male wolf standing next to me at the door. He cautiously eyes the distance between our arms and smiles when it suits him.

Samuel looks amused. "I guess this must come as some surprise then."

Dad merely grunts and straightens himself up trying to act as if that fact no longer bothers him. Mom takes this time to speak up again.

"Well, come in you two before the food gets cold," she says, ushering us inside.

We follow in after her and it is then that the gravity of the situation finally hits me. I am about to spring some massive news on them and it could change everything. They'll either be happy for me or not. Either way, after tonight I am leaving with Samuel. I just hope they will support me.