Chapter four

Dahlia’s POV

My hands shook as I gripped the edge of the bathroom sink, the cool porcelain biting into my palms. Another wave of nausea crashed over me, and I heaved into the toilet, my stomach clenching until there was nothing left but bile and tears. 

My body felt weak, as if it were made of paper, fragile and ready to tear at the slightest touch. This was the fifth time I’d thrown up today, and it was barely past noon. 

Eleven months and two weeks. That’s how long I’ve been living under Ethan’s roof. Or perhaps “existing” was a better word for it. Every day felt like an eternity, a slow march through a nightmare I could never wake up from. 

I barely slept anymore, the panic attacks always found me in the dark. When I did manage to close my eyes, I’d wake up screaming, choking on air, my heart pounding in my chest as if trying to escape.

In those eleven months, Ethan and I had barely exchanged more than ten sentences. Each one felt like pulling teeth, sharp and painful, and I was usually the one doing the talking. 

He mostly answered with cold silence or a dismissive nod, treating me as if I were invisible, a ghost haunting his mansion. And yet, somehow, despite his cruelty, I had found myself falling in love with him. 

Pathetic, isn’t it? Falling for a man who barely knew I existed, who slept with other women in our own home. 

Alice. 

That woman, with her perfect hair and her sharp smile, had become a permanent fixture in our house. She moved in like she owned the place, acting like she was the lady of the manor. I let her. 

I didn’t have the strength to fight. Most days, I didn’t even have the strength to get out of bed. I was a shadow, fading into the corners, always in my room, trapped in my thoughts, spiraling deeper and deeper into the darkness.

Alice seemed to delight in tormenting me, always finding new ways to make me feel small, insignificant. “You think Ethan is going to look at you twice? Think again, you stupid girl,” she hissed at me one morning in the kitchen as I made coffee. “Ethan is mine, and no matter what you do, he will never be yours.”

“The two of you might be married on paper, but everyone knows it’s a sham. You’re nobody. And nobody marries men like Ethan. Get that into your thick skull,” she sneered. 

Her voice was like poison, seeping into my mind, making me question everything about myself. “Now, move out of my way, you ugly freak.”

And Ethan... Ethan just stood there, listening to her degrade me, his expression unreadable. He never said a word to stop her. Never defended me, not once. 

Each time it happened, my heart broke a little more, but I learned to live with it. I learned to bury the pain deep inside, in that place where all my broken dreams and shattered hopes lay hidden. 

And now, here I was, just two weeks before our marriage contract ended, and I was more anxious than ever about what was to come. What would I do when he finally cast me aside, as he’d promised he would from the start? 

I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, trying to steady my breathing. I needed help. I needed to see a doctor. I’d already asked Maria, to see if she could arrange something, and now, desperate, I called her into my room again.

"Maria," I rasped, my voice barely a whisper. "Have you spoken to the doctor? I don’t feel well. I feel weaker today."

Maria studied me for a moment, her eyes filled with something I couldn’t quite place —was it suspicion? Concern? I wondered if she thought I was dying. 

Maybe I was. Not until she mentioned the appointment she’d set up with a local doctor just outside of town. 

"The doctor’s appointment is in an hour," she said. "Can you freshen up on your own, or do you need my help?"

"I can manage," I mumbled, pushing myself off the bed. 

My legs felt like they were made of lead, but I forced myself into the en-suite bathroom and turned on the shower. The cold water hit my skin like a shock, but it helped clear my head, if only for a moment.

The drive to the hospital felt like a blur, the world outside the car window melting into a smear of colors. My heart was pounding in my chest, and I couldn’t tell if it was from fear or something else. 

When we finally arrived, a middle-aged doctor greeted us with a warm smile, and I felt a lump rise in my throat. It had been so long since anyone had looked at me like that, with kindness, with care.

The tests seemed to drag on forever, a series of needles and machines and cold metal instruments. I was exhausted by the end of it, barely holding myself together. 

Just when I thought it was over, the doctor suggested a pregnancy test, just to rule it out, he said. I was too tired to argue, so I took the over-the-counter stick, and a few minutes later, there it was: two pink lines.

Positive.

I stared at the stick in disbelief, my mind racing. How could this be? I’d only slept with Ethan once, on one of his drunken nights. He had mistaken me for Alice, and I had let him. 

I had been so desperate for some kind of connection, some sign that he saw me, that I existed in his world. I’d let him touch me, let him take what he wanted, and I’d pretended, just for that night, that it meant something. 

But it was only once and he took my virginity, and he didn’t even remember. What would he think if he found out about the baby? He’d think it was a trap, a scheme to hold onto him. He’d never believe it was his.

On the drive back home, panic clawed at my chest, squeezing the air from my lungs. I couldn’t breathe. How could I tell him? He wouldn’t believe me. He’d throw me out. He’d think I was lying, that I was trying to trap him in this loveless marriage. 

Maria reached over and placed a hand on my shoulder, her touch steadying me, but it was too late. I was already falling apart. Tears streamed down my face, and I couldn’t stop them. 

I buried my face in my hands, my whole body shaking with silent sobs. How has my life come to this? I hadn’t thought about the consequences when I’d let him into my bed, let myself pretend, just for one night, that he might love me back.

When we got back to the villa, I felt like a ghost, drifting through the halls, my mind numb with shock. I had only two weeks left as Ethan’s wife, but none of it mattered now. 

I was carrying his child, and he would never accept it. I couldn’t let him insult me or question my child’s identity. Not Ethan Caine, not anyone. 

Maria brought in a tray of food, but I barely noticed her. I was too lost in my thoughts, trapped in my own head. “You need to eat,” she insisted. “If not for yourself, then for the baby.”

I shook my head. “I don’t feel like eating anything right now, Maria.”

Her voice rose, sharp with frustration. “That’s the thing, Dahlia! You don’t have a choice. It’s not just about you anymore.”

After a long moment, I relented, taking a small piece of cake from the tray. The sweetness tasted like ashes in my mouth. I stared at Maria, wondering if she knew the answer to the question that had been gnawing at my mind.

“Do you think he’ll accept this baby?” I whispered, my voice barely audible. I felt dead inside, hollow and empty.

Maria hesitated. “Who? Mr. Ethan?”

“Yes.”

She sighed, her expression softening with pity. “I don’t know, Dahlia. I really don’t. Things are more complicated than we thought. I know I shouldn’t say this, but… I warned you against falling in love with him.”

“I know,” I admitted, my voice cracking. “I shouldn’t have, but my heart doesn’t listen. I love him so much, Maria. It hurts seeing him with Alice. It hurts more than I can bear.”

A tear slipped down my cheek, but I didn’t bother wiping it away. “He’ll question me, my character. He won’t even remember the night we were together. And when the results come in tomorrow… I don’t know what I’ll do.”

Maria’s face softened. “I’m sorry, Dahlia. I really am.”

She left the room, and I lay there, staring up at the ceiling, trying to calm my racing heart. I could feel the weight of the world pressing down on me, the uncertainty of tomorrow bearing down like a storm. 

When Maria left, I heard her talking to Alice outside the door. I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but I could feel the tension, the way Maria’s voice trembled. I knew Alice had heard everything.

I was too exhausted to care.

Alice’s cruel smile flashed in my mind. I knew she would find a way to twist this, to make it worse. But I wouldn’t let her.