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11. BREAK DOWN
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THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 12. PEACE FINALLY
The sound. That constant sound that came with each wood he chopped into half. It was therapy I did not know I needed. The cool wind, I was thankful for it because I felt it took away some of the bad odour I carried. My skin was itching. I knew it was mostly in my head but I saw the torture of not being allowed to shower. I felt so dirty and disgusting. I did not even want to know what I looked like, just dirt stuck on my skin and I accepted the disgust. I sat on my shins, my eyes trailed on Alpha Logan as he chopped the wood he had hauled out from the shed behind the pack house. There was so much wood and I wanted to see how far he would go. He seemed a bit relaxed. After the massacre he had done in the early hours of the morning, he took a shower, cleaned his room then we left the house to where we were at that point. The wind blew my hair. It felt greasy and claggy. I stared down, using a thin twig to clean my nails, the only thing I could clean. Footstep approached, pulling my
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 13. MEMORIES THAT SCAR
Somehow, I had found freedom. Alpha Logan walked into the room he had trashed the day before. I would say it was a living room before he happened to it. Nothing had been spared, broken pieces of what once was. He moved around the room, picking up the pieces. He would stare at different broken items for a while before putting them away. I stayed by the door, bending to pick up a few pieces. When he was further from the garbage bag, I ran to put all the pieces I had collected then went back to collect more. It took hours on hours. Nothing was salvageable. Not even the large couch which he couldn’t take his eyes off. He ran his hand over it and did not dare move it as torn as it was. He left and came back with a broom and a mop. He left to collect water and when he came back I was already halfway sweeping. I made sure I left nothing behind. It was my first time sweeping and it made me feel normal. For those minutes I played the normal girl who did normal chores with a normal family.
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 14. SEE THROUGH
If I ever chose a day to wallow in my sorrows it would be that day. If I ever chose a way for my demons to drown me, it would be in that way. My eyes were sore even before I opened them. My heart seemed to be pounding from them, not wanting to open so I did not. I had never been so warm in my life. No blanket could ever compare. I felt safe in a way I could not describe. I had found shelter and I did not want to step out. Alpha Logan’s heart pound right on my face. It was normal for pure werewolves but for me, as a hybrid, it was fast. I listened to it’s drum and whizzed away in a serenade. I was engulfed in him. His arms held so tightly I never wanted anything else. I held tighter to him and fought the tears from spilling because I had never experienced anything like it. I hadn’t realized how scared and how torn I was until lying there in his arms. His warm breath fell on my hair. His scent healed as I breathed it in. It was all maddening. His breath changed and his heart sped u
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 15. LOGAN
That night we did not sleep in the same bed but somehow, we were connected. I sat on the floor, a gold chain binding my hands together. My knees were up, head on them in the silence of the night. It had been an hour since Logan slipped in bed. I could not tell if he was asleep or awake. My head turned, staring at the bundle of sheets on the bed with the realization falling on me. I had slightly gained more night vision which meant I was healing. I wondered how long it would take to get my wolf back or if I would be able to get her back at all. The thought left me aching deep in a way I could not describe. “Fall alisialize.” The chains fell away. I twisted my wrists around then placed my hand on the bed, my head on my knees, staring at my outstretched arm. I closed my eyes and drifted into nothingness. My eyes pulled open as my hand was pulled up with large warm fingers lacing through mine. The warmth spread from that hand down my arm to my toes. I wanted to smile but found myself
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 16. TEETH AND BLOOD
Rays peaked in from every little space available in the thick dark forest. It was just rare shots of orange here and there. I was seated up, such fascination before me. We passed through one of the larger beams from the sun and that little dose of its heat was amazing. I turned to stare back at it only for us to jump into a clearing. My head turned forward, a gasp pulling from me. I could not help but impatiently tap on Logan’s wolf over and over again. He shook his head but I continued tapping. “Logan, look. The sun.” I pointed as if he could see me. The excitement had me sound like a child. I had never seen the sun so beautiful. It was about to sink over the large white mountains. The sky was colored all thick shades of orange and it was breathtaking. Logan stopped and turned, staring at the amazing sight. I sighed, content. He sat and just watched with my smile finally breaking through. Instead of looking ahead I found myself staring at him. My hand went to the top of his head
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 17. BRIDGES
The bond travelled up to my head then down to my very toes. His DNA tied with mine and I could feel each and every strand as it sewed itself into mine. He would forever be with me, connected no matter what. I stumbled more into him, the tears falling. It was not supposed to happen. The dread intensified and I wept. “No.” The word kept playing out of my lips over and over. My hands squeezed tighter onto his arm, my nails digging in. His body trembled even harder than mine and the word I kept saying became his own mantra. His arm fell away and he stumbled from me. I nearly fell, turning with my hand on my heart before it stopped beating. His own eyes were wide, covered in glass tears. His hand fell on his bloody mouth, staring at me as he said no over and over. He kept stepping back in shock until his back hit the wall. “No.” He word fell out, his head shaking to enforce it. My stomach turned and I wanted to vomit. “What have I done?” “Logan!” A roar erupted from behind me. I c
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 18. WHAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN
Logan I dreamt of the moment a million times but it did not feel the same. I held her tighter as my body shook with my mind in absolute chaos. What did I do? The question kept coming over and over again. I was used to the chaos, to the anger but this….I could not bear the feelings that coursed through my body. “I am sorry.” The words escaped my lips, digging Flavia into me with my arms as she held me just as tight. “It’s okay Logan.” She assured and panicked even harder without even knowing what I was apologizing for. Had she seen the mark? Had she smelt me on Adira? My stomach was in coils, hating myself deeper than before. “I am sorry. It doesn’t mean anything. I made a mistake.” One after another the words trickled out until Flavia placed her hands on my chest and pushed back. I wanted to hold her much longer but she pushed harder. Her strength shocked me. I stepped back, my head hanging in absolute shame. I had betrayed her. “What happened Logan?” The word came out sha
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 19. MATES
Adira The vampire king pushed the door open to halt in his steps as a toddler came into view, standing on his two feet, slightly bending back then forth. Behind the child were two dragons in the size of a large eagle. My eyes widened because in my whole life I had never seen a dragon. A frown spread on my face, pulling my thoughts from Logan and the vampire queen. How did they have dragons? “How did you get here?” The vampire king exclaimed and it pulled nothing but a giggle from the young child, showing his white teeth. His chuckle turned to a wide grin. My frown deepened yet my heart strings tugged hard. The vampire king bent and picked up the child wearing a khakhi fluffy jumpsuit and sneakers. My eyes trailed to the dragons that acted as guards, their eyes never snapping away from the baby. They rose to the king’s height. He stretched his hand to brush both their heads. Their eyes closed and it set my heart pounding harder. “Do you want to freshen up?” The king questioned with
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THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 31. PACK LIFE
EIGHT MONTHS LATERADIRA“And what about this one Luna?”“That’s rosemary Ashley,” I answered with her gasping, nearly having me laugh.“What does it do?” Remy questioned with her eyes wider. They could never say no to an opportunity to play with dirt. I took Remy in, her hands muddy as she pat them on the soil around the tomatoes.“I mainly use it to cook Remy.” She gasped. Anything I would say to them would have them wide-eyed and gasping.“Cooking what Luna?” I shook my head, a giggle pulling from me.“Food Beck.”My gardens were filled with toddlers planting and picking herbs. I wouldn’t have been able to keep them out of the gardens even if I tried to. The back of the alpha house had vegetable and herb gardens spreading to the forest. The front was littered with so many different flowers I was guilty of planting.Eight months it had been since I promised Logan forever and finally, he put a smile on my face. The past months had been more than I could imagine life could be. I shone
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 30. STAY
On trembling legs, I rose with my mate in my arms, limp, and cold. I wanted to bawl. I wanted to scream. I wanted to run and never stop. Everything was spinning. Everything was blurring. The pain in my chest was indescribable. The scream was caught in my chest, suffocating me. In a way I could not process. In a way my mind could not get past the point that I had just been holding and stroking her body not long ago. How could she be gone?! My mouth opened and closed. I shut my eyes, the tears raining. I opened them, seeing my warriors all standing, staring, even those that had been knocked out. She was gone, her spell faded away. My chest was closing in as I heaved. What was I supposed to do? This couldn’t be it? Down I crumbled, my knees hitting ground. “Take her to the queen!” Sunny’s voice broke through my daze and finally it clicked. He did not have to say it twice. I was up and stumbling forward before they could even take their next breath. My feet were weak but grew stro
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 29. I LOVE YOU
Somehow, I could not even be angry because of the pain. Anger was how I kept going but this blow, it wiped me out. I ran, my warriors just behind me. They did not even have to try to keep up because I was wasted. I could barely even see the way. My heart dropped and squeezed as I saw the first body. I stopped, lowering with my hand going over to the neck. Relief washed over me as I heard a faint heartbeat. They were alive. The more we ran toward the border the more bodies, bodies of my border patrol. All were still alive, just knocked out. It brought some hope. Maybe I could talk Adira out of it. Somehow, I still held hope. How stupid was I? The words from the man’s mouth echoed in my head. Adira and her father? The disgust washed over me yet still, I held hope. My run broke with harsh winds suddenly greeting us out of nowhere. They were so harsh I had to cover my mouth and nose. The trees had all been cleared away. Had she levelled the land for the fight? I did not even want t
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 28. NEVER TRUST A ROGUE
Logan My finger ran up and down her arm while I held her onto my chest. Her chest gently rose and fell yet I knew she was not asleep. But it seemed she wanted me to believe she had succumbed to sleep or maybe she did not want to talk. I understood. I had everything I needed and I did not want to ruin it by throwing out words that had me in confusion. Her skin was the softest I had touched in all my years. She had no marks, no scars, just perfect creamy skin I could not stop stroking. The sparks were getting intense with each stroke and I loved them. She was so small she fit in me. I could still remember how it felt to be inside her and I would forever be amazed at how amazing it feels. Even just holding her, it was an experience that nearly drowned me in euphoria. I wanted no sleep because it would take me away from her. Her hair spread over my chest, her lips slightly pressed on my skin. I marked the moment in my head over and over because I did not want to forget it. I angled m
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 27. CALL MY NAME
Logan If only they knew their chatter irritated me they would have stopped at once. If my scorn did not say it, then they did not care for their lives. My eyes closed and I wanted to succumb to my thoughts in peace and quiet but the chatter took that away from me. Deadly was what I would describe myself as. From the moment I got back to the pack, I turned for the worst. I told Elissa to fuck off. She left crying with no protection to make sure she got home safe. Why would I care? She had made the way to my pack on her own so she could make it back to her pack on her own. I told my beta to pack his bags and piss off my land until he knew who his alpha was. He had thought I was joking so when I carried him to the pack border myself he understood his real position in the pack. He came crawling back because he had nowhere else to go. I would never be disrespected by infants. I was there when his mother changed his diapers and I watched his balls drop. He was not going to question my
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 26. BACK IN TIME
11 YEARS AGO Third P.O.V The princess of the rogue princess stood from the bathtub. A towel wrapped around her before her lady-in-waiting dried her skin for her. They worked in silence. As much as the day was supposed to be one of peace they both were in their heads because of information they learned just a day ago. “I am done princess, please stand there,” Roselyn stated with the princess doing as told. She stared at her tiny feet, her toes curled. She had spent the previous night weeping her heart out so she bore the consequences on the following day. Her nose was blocked and her eyes were swollen. Her head turned to the guard not far away, staring. She felt naked even with the towel around her. “I am done, arms up princess.” She followed the instructions with Roselyn applying deodorant on her then moisturized her skin. The princess could see her trusted lady sweat right before her. She could see her hands tremble and how her heart could be seen pounding through her chest. I
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 25. FATHERS AND DAUGHTERS
The loud laughter brought me back to the world. My eyes trailed up from the grimoire to the children. They were chasing a butterfly, all seeming to enjoy it. Kia fell down and my breath caught only to be released when he laughed even harder before he rolled and stood up, running after his two siblings who were flying after the butterfly. I was afraid they would devour it. The sun soaked through my skin to warm even my insides. I picked up a piece of fruit, sliding it into my mouth. No one else was around. Flavia and Dante kept themselves isolated from their people. None visited, not since I was there anyway. There were just a couple of hi’s and hey’s here and there but besides that, nothing. The king and queen lived life as ordinary people, doing everything for their people but keeping them at arm’s length. It shocked me and I could see there were wounds. Two weeks it had been. Two weeks it had been without my mate. The hole in my chest grew larger with each day that passed and
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 24. NEW BEGINNINGS
I cleaned Logan before we walked out of the shower. He brushed his teeth and I stood by his side, just staring at him. I would never forget the feel of him nor his taste in my mouth and I wanted to taste nothing else. He spat and rinsed his teeth before we walked to the closet. I oiled his skin for him, his eyes following me. When I stood up, he placed his finger under my chin. He tipped my head up and claimed my lips. I felt it’s warmth down to my toes. They curled on the carpet. He pulled back and stared down at me. I lowered my heels back onto the ground. His arms spread around my waist, pulling me into him. I loved it so much and I tried so hard to relish the feeling of being in his arms. My head lowered to his chest, listening to his heart drum. Words I had no idea where they were coming from hung at the tip of my tongue. I swallowed them back because I did not believe they were true. How could you love someone so fast? We pulled away from each other, him stepping back. I
THE ROYALLY SCREWED ROGUE 23. DON'T LEAVE
“My beautiful daughter. There is none as beautiful as you, just like your mother.” I gulped down the saliva in my mouth. Each step he took forward I took one back. Even after all the years I still fell into his trap. My calves touched the bed and I jumped from the impact. Once again, the fear consumed me so much I did not realize I was going exactly where he wanted me. I tried to scramble away but he rushed to push me down the bed. He straddled on top of me, holding me down with his weight. I couldn’t breathe, my head twisting to the side as his fingers pinched my chin, pulling me back to stare at his red crazy eyes. “You even smell like her.” My eyes shut close, tears spilling even with the years of experience. “Once upon a time she would tremble just like you do now.” The words always left me trembling even harder. His hand snaked under the flimsy bra he had gave Roselyn to make me wear for that day. “So sexy.” My skin was crawling, my insides turning in. The pleas stuck
