THIRTY MINUTES AGO“I just can't sit down and let her have you!”“Do you think is a game livie? Do you think I want us to be arguing about this right now?” I am so pissed at her.“You have told me that you are doing something to rectify this situation and yet I don’t see you doing anything!”My head feels like it's going to explode. “So you think killing her is going to solve everything.”“You are here with me right now aren't you?”Sometimes I hate how sure she is of herself. I hate how she thinks she can string me along and I will be her puppet, say yes to everything she does. She thinks she is the one calling the shots.“Do you have any idea of what will happen when she dies? Do you?” I take another step towards her and that cocky look she has on starts to crack. Do you know what you almost cost me tonight?” Her long manicured fingers trail on my chest. “I know that Zack isn't happy with me, but I'm doing all of this for you. I want us to be happy he can bond with my wolf, I want
ARI“Open the door, Silvers.”That tone is too calm, too composed for me to open the door. Shit! Zade is here and I am pretty sure he is here to kill me. I wrecked his beautiful sports car, but I kind of don’t care.I take my time walking to the door, and as I open the door, I fake yawn and look at him with a bored expression. “What do you want?”He looks at me from head to toe, before pushing in. he is alone but I don’t dare close the door.“You need to leave, it’s the middle of the night and I have classes tomorrow.”“I am not leaving.”“What? Why?” I need him out of my dorm room now.“Did you forget the dal we had?”“What deal?”He goes and sits on the couch, sprawled and he easily fills it up, sitting like he is the king or something. “My wolf needs time with you otherwise he gives me a hard time. Tonight is one of those nights.”“Ew! Get out, get out!” I grab a pillow and start hitting him grossed out. “I am not some hooker you can come by in the midnight to satisfy you and then
ARIZade’s car explosion is the talk of the school the next day.I keep my head down, hugging my books close to my chest as I make my way to my first class, avoiding anything that might sell me out. If they knew I was the one who did it, they would all eat me alive.Zade is their beloved prince, the most feared boy, and the alpha of the academy. It's clear whose side everyone is on. Starting a war with someone like that is plain stupid because not only are you facing him off but the whole damn school.But I am done trying to be good, fit in, and be liked. He deserved it so I won't waste my time trying to police my morality. That doesn't mean that I slept a wink last night since I kept wondering why he didn’t seem mad, why he didn’t drag me by my hair and execute me for torching his beautiful car.He seemed to … approve too like I made a point and he was pleased with it. I have never been so confused in my entire life as I feel now.I am caught up in my own head I completely miss the s
ARIMy shackles rise as the tall girl approaches us, her mouth curled in a smile. Her eyes scan me up and down before turning to the person right beside me.I feel Mimi tense up as Olivia takes a step closer to her. “I was waiting for you.”I expected this, but that doesn’t lessen the twinge of disappointment I feel when Olivia takes Mimi’s hand and drags her away from me.“wh-what do you want?” Mimi’s eyes widen as she trips on her feet, almost falling as Olivia drags her away.“My homework, where is it?”“Oh, I have it, I finished writing last night. The theories explained are all-““I don’t need to hear about the homework, I gave you to solve it for a reason,” Olivia smiles, her voice cloyed with such sweetness you wouldn’t think that she could ever be malicious.I haven’t seen her since she left me for dead. I am angry, as she moves about as if she didn’t stab me. I look around the filling classroom and notice that we are the center of attention as if they are all waiting for a fi
ARIAll the anger I have been trying to smother down starts bubbling and I frown, looking at the blond. This is poking the bear in its cave but I am done. I am not being a sheep. I didn’t ask to be here in the first place.“Are you going to let her sit with us?” the flirt asks Zade who has been ignoring all of this and reading in his little book.“I don’t give a fuck what she does.”“Run along now,” one of the girls waves me off.“I will just tell the teacher we are not compatible then,” I smile, before rolling my eyes, smile dropping as I walk over to the teacher at the front of the class.“Is she seriously tattle-telling on us?”“Can I change the group? I don’t think-““You are Ari Silvers, right? New student?” she cuts me off.“Yes ma'am.”“In this school, we all try and get along. You are new here yes, but this is an opportunity for you to get to know your classmates.”“But they-““Is this going to be a problem?” her gaze turns cold.She is not going to help me. What was I thinkin
ZADEI have been having mood swings of late.It's so damn annoying I don’t know if I want to strangle someone or cry. This is too alien for me and I know none of these emotions are mine but that doesn’t make me feel them all any less.Like now, I am feeling so awful, so bad my chest feels like it's carving itself in and it’s all my fault.I know it's my fault that Silvers is crying and feeling dejected, and this hating game I have going on is tanking so badly right now.“You, good man?” Rowan sits next to me, putting his tray on the table. You look like you are mad at the food.”“I am fine.” Far from it.Ari and her girls all arrive at the table, and she opts to sit far from me. I guess we are still fighting. I haven’t gone to apologize and make amends so I know she is going to ignore me until I do. We lock eyes but she looks away, turning to Rhea to talk to her about something.I should be worried and thinking of how to make amends with my girlfriend. I should be preoccupied with tha
ZADE “She is the one eating. Lots of proteins, high-energy foods, and a glass of milk.” I turn to look at the wide-eyed girl who is looking so confused but wary.Does she think I will poison her in front of everyone or something? Not my style- the poison, I mean.“Don’t just stand there, get it and get lost, don’t make me regret this,” I mutter before making my way back to my table.I don’t miss the act that the whole academy just watched all unfold, probably heard everything too. No, my attention is back to my table and the way Olivia is watching me like she is going to incinerate me with just her eyes.Behind all that fury, I don’t miss the embarrassment and hurt. I am dick and I know it.“What’s that about? You are in team Ari now?” Rowan puts his fork down just as I sit down, exhaling. Livie“I didn’t know there were teams.”“What are you talking about? I thought you hated her, but clearly, that’s all in the past now,” Cass looks between me and the girl who is now walking out of
ARIThere shouldn’t be a need for me to attend these obnoxious classes.What is knowing how to kickbox going to help me when all I want to be is a lawyer and live away from all these snobby wolves?“I hate this class the most,” I grumble as I tug the shirt I am wearing. It’s baggy, almost covering the shorts I am wearing underneath.“I know but it’s mandatory. All werewolves should know how to fight and protect their alpha,” Mimi chirps next to me, a large bottle of water in hand.“You like it?” I raise my eyebrows. I am not judging, but she doesn’t seem like the type who would enjoy any type of sport. She is so doll like and cute, I want to put her in my pocket and protect her forever.“Oh no, I am just repeating what the teacher said on the first day of orientation.”“Wow, you are like a walking Wikipedia.”“I can’t help that I am smart and have a good memory. It should fill in the other areas I am lacking,” she pushes her glass up her nose.Someone's shoulder bumps me so hard I cra
ARI“What's going on inside this little mind?” his voice is so close to me, nose brushing my temple.I should feel something. A tingle, but I am so damn tired. All I want is to sleep, forget that I exist for a few hours before I start going back to my life. I can't escape it anymore, now can I?“Nothing,” I sigh. “I am just a little sleepy.”Is he expecting more from me tonight?I wish I had the girls with me. They would allow me to be in your space. Maybe I should call them, text them, but I don't have my phone. I remember crashing it in the hotel suite before I walked out into the traffic.Maybe I am not as okay as I think. But getting a grip is important.If I am going to avenge and face the people who ruined me to begin with, I can't let go of the reality. I need to be focused and work hard to make sure they don’t destroy me before I destroy them.I know I am not going to come out of it. The plans I made to go study law as further studies, get out of the pack and live my life as a
ARIMy life is a mess.It’s a fucked life, painful, dry, bland, void of colour.I am ugly too, rotting slowly inside, underserving of anything good because that’s just what is set in stone for me.Despite it all, despite feeling all of that, as Zade looks at me like I mean something, like I matter … I can't help but want to be under that gaze for a longer time.He is looking at me how he used to look at Olivia, like he might love me, like I mean something. He wants to know if I am okay, taking care of me, a gentle, caring touch on my cold, withering soul.I don’t deserve it, and yet.I yearn for it. Crave it. I can't not shudder under it.“Do you want me to ask you?”Yes. I want him to ask me. I want him to push for me to tell him what's going on in my head. For him to fight for me. I am selfish like that. Mother didn’t say anything untrue, because here I am, asking and taking what doesn’t belong to me.I came into this life, took Olivia’s man under fate’s guidance, and yes. It hurt.
ARII don’t think I have ever truly let myself think deeply about Zade, who is becoming, and his birthright. I am not one to attach my identity to the boy I am seeing or crushing on, and in this case, the boy I am mated to.But it's still heavy. I find it … sexy that he is already so mature, powerful too, and it's only going to get even better.Yes, I think I am crushing on Zade, and I can't control choking on my water once that fully hits me.“Are you okay?” he asks me as he rushes to my side, rubbing my back.“Yeah,” I wheeze out. “Guess I am a little surprised.”“Why?” he chuckles as he gets back to cooking.“The first thing someone sees when they see you is how spoiled you are.” That’s not true.The first thing I saw and felt when I first laid my eyes on him was just how magnetic and powerful he was. Yes, you could tell from miles away that he is wealthy, but it wasn’t the kind I got from the rest of the students.No, his was the quiet, generational wealth that just didn’t come fr
ARIIt’s weird.I woke up feeling this gut-wrenching painful reminder that I was still alive, that I am still feeling, and my mind is still as loud as before.I wasn’t ready to face myself, the world, or even reality, so I went back to sleep despite not knowing where I was. I could hear someone, a female, who would come and look after me once in a while. I should have been worried that a stranger was hovering over me.But I didn’t care. That’s how gone I was. I did manage to sleep more until I woke up again, and the tension in my temples was lessening.Someone was touching me like I was so fragile, and I could feel how gentle they were being. I knew it was Zade even before I could open my eyes.It felt better, the chatter, the exhaustion… it all lessened when he was around like this. It’s something I have come to notice, not ready to admit it yet, but it’s there.I could hear his thoughts. They were so unguarded, I wondered if he knew I could hear them, and it’s the first time I've be
ZADEShe is so beautiful.I exhale softly as I sit on the bed, watching her sleep. I can't resist reaching out with gentle fingers as I push back her hair off her face.Her hands are tucked under her chin, pressed to her chest, her body curled in as if she is feeling cold or protecting herself from something.But she isn't feeling cold; her body temperature is higher, too, which prompts me to stand up and walk over to the screen door. I slide it open, and the soft light curtains let the air in, billowing soundlessly.I had this bedroom built with a terrace garden, so it feels like someone is sleeping in a garden. I know she will love it when she wakes up.I sit on the floor, watching her as she exhales softly once cool air hits her skin.She had a massive panic attack, and I wasn’t there to help her. The first one she ever had was when she saw me kill that crush of hers –something I don’t regret, but I do regret triggering it- and she broke down in the bathroom.I knew she didn’t want
ZADEMercy.That word alone makes me hit her at the back of the neck as gently as I can, rendering her unconscious. I hold her limp body, my eyes on her now sleeping face, as I breathe hard.I am scared.I almost lost her a few minutes ago, and then watched her as she almost slipped out of her mind. I stand up as I carry her bridal style to my car, where I am parked. I don’t mind the eyes on me, murmuring bout the girl who almost got run over by walking to the busy highway.I secure Ari on the seat before I get in myself and drive away.I knew something was off, from the moment I saw her mother walking out of the hotel, minutes after I had dropped ari and then the coldness that overcame me like I had been pushed in an extremely icy frozen lake.I don’t think twice, taking her to my private home, somewhere no one knows, not even my father. She is still out cold, and I start to worry that I might have hurt her. Lying her gently on the bed, I clean her up, making sure she is comfortable
ARISomething is breaking inside me.I can’t feel my touch, even as I touch my chest. I have gone numb, nothing truly registering as I sit on the floor, remaining in a state of static as she has left me.What you are doing is not worth it.Not worth it.Nothing is worth it.What do I do now?A murderer. A misguided child. Doing things that I shouldn’t, wrecking her life.A broken wail escapes my lips as I hunch down, feeling like I am taking my first breath.This is not how it was supposed to go. How can this happen? I killed someone, but I don’t know why. I don’t know why I keep getting angry, like I am in a cage, and when I am let out, I lash out at the first person closest.I wish I could stop, remember myself, and stop getting so angry, to stop my actions before they are thrown back at me, like I am going crazy and need to be put down.Everything I am doing feels wrong. Everyone keeps telling me that I am doing the wrong thing the wrong way.I don’t know what to do anymore. I don’
ARIMy phone starts to vibrate incessantly, but I choose to ignore it.Everything is overwhelming. From this car ride, to the boy sitting next to me. I just want to be alone, maybe stare at the wall in silence for hours until I feel like I am coming back to myself.But it won't stop, now starting to ring nonstop. I sigh, picking it up and seeing that my mother has sent me a bunch of texts, starting calm, asking if she can talk to me until they all progress, calm evolving to anger.“Stop calling me,” I say as soon as I answer the tenth call.“Where are you?”“Why?”“I need to speak to you,” she sounds like she is out of breath.For a second, I thought the bad guys who had been chasing us had come back, and she was in danger.“Are you okay?” I sit up, alert. “Are you in danger?”“No, but we need to talk immediately. If not, I will go to your dorm and then we can talk there, but I am sure you don't want people to eavesdrop on this conversation.”My heart is hammering, and I can feel the
ZADEI don’t think twice, swerving the car by the side of the road and killing the engine. It happens all too fast, and Ari is heaving fast, palm pressed on her chest as she looks at me like I have lost my mind.Maybe I have, but I can't have this conversation while driving.“Why did you stop? Let’s get going, I need to get my car back and go on about my day.”“I am sorry.” It comes out in a whisper, where I bow my head, forehead pressed on the wheel.“Call it even, I left you for dead anyway,” she says, sitting back.“I am sorry,” I repeat, this time a little louder. When she doesn’t say anything, I turn my head to her. She is looking anywhere but at me.She knows what I mean, it’s the very thing that has been hanging above us, the thing that has been suffocating us both. The unspoken thing.“I don’t know what you are apologizing for.” She can't even look at me.“I am sorry for rejecting you, Ari.”The silence that stretches between us is deafening.Until she breaks it with a word th