CHAPTER FIVE

When I answered it, it was Kiran on the other end. I quietly left the rowdy pub to take it with me and went outside.

"Hi," I said, sounding as unassuming as I could manage. I secretly hoped that my guilt at envisioning another man wouldn't be obvious to everyone else. "How is the newborn doing?"

"He's doing well and had a productive day at the nursery. I was in bed by seven, so you didn't really miss out on anything."

"Aw, I really do miss him. Tomorrow night, I'm going to make an effort to call and tell him a tale before bed. Because my workplace had recently arranged for some networking drinks to take place tonight, I am obliged to go with all of the most eligible farmers in Edinburgh. There is no response. What exactly was the matter with my husband?

He was unharmed until he eventually uttered, "Sounds like hell." "I will let you proceed with the rest of your evening then. Remember that you're supposed to work, so don't go too wild."

"What exactly are you trying to say with that?" Was he aware of what happened the night before?

"Well, I don't believe they would take too kindly to couches being left on their lawns," you may say. "It's just not in their nature."

I chuckled, relieved, and responded, "No, you're correct."

Before stepping back inside the pub, which was unusually crowded for a weeknight, I stopped to catch my breath by leaning against the cool wall and taking a few deep breaths. I maneuvered my way through the masses until I found Rory; he was the only one still seated at the table I had departed a few minutes earlier. There was no sign of Kerry or the others anywhere in the area. At first, I was hesitant, but as he caught sight of me, I stepped forward to approach him.

"Hey, does anyone know where everyone is?" When I was finally near enough to him, I asked him. He gave a shrug but was silent otherwise.

"Listen, if you're still angry about what happened last night, I'm sorry. I've been known to do some wild things when I've been drinking.

Stonewalling me in the process, he maintained his silence while maintaining eye contact with me. When I stopped and thought about it, he hadn't actually spoken to me directly the whole night. What exactly was he playing at? A few minutes later, when the others came with drinks and the conversation started, I felt a sense of relief wash over me. The reality of the brick wall that was out with us, combined with the sensual and forbidden thoughts that I was having, had me in desperate need of a drink. I had told myself that I wouldn't drink as much tonight.

And drink we did, drink, drink and drink. While Kerry and I were laughing it up on the dance floor, I yelled to her, "Oh hell, I'm so going to regret this in the morning." I noticed Rory chatting with a female near the bar at one point throughout the night, but later I saw her alone, and Rory was nowhere to be seen. Rory had almost vanished for the majority of the evening.

"Would it bother you if I went back with John?" While Kerry was crashing into me at the bar, she asked me the question. "Rory is here now, and you and he should be able to go back to the barn together, shouldn't you?"

"What? But you can't trust me since I'm so intoxicated. I completely lose my habitability, and Mr. Moody's posterior is hot. If he's around me, he won't be safe.

"Yep." Kerry gave me a nod, giggling as she glanced away from me.

And he's been standing right here next to me, hasn't he?" I added. I hesitantly shifted my attention to the figure standing nearby, and as Rory and I locked eyes, he gave a little nod of acknowledgment. I was intoxicated, so I laughed it off, although I was only mildly ashamed. Before I could say no, Kerry planted a peck on my cheek and then quickly retreated into the crowd. I was taken aback. After everyone else had departed, it was only me and the brick wall, both of whom seemed to have had quite a bit to drink.

"Sexy am I?" It was the first time that he had spoken directly to me all night, so I leaned closer to him so that he could brush his finger down my cheek in response to his question.

I followed it up by saying, "Yes, you're sexy, I'm married," hoping it would put him off. Although he let out a loud sigh, he kept stroking his fingers softly over the strands of hair covering my cheek. I attempted to reawaken my senses by closing my eyes, but his odor was so alluring and entrancing that I found myself moving closer to get a better whiff. He stepped closer to me, allowing his odor to fill my nose. I had never been strong enough to be able to resist hunger before, but this one was driving me crazy. On a gloomy day, he was like a warm doughnut that I wanted to eat completely.

His hand grabbed mine, and he led me out of the bar. I followed him through the crowd, and our fingers got entangled as we walked; Kiran had only ever held my hand before, and it didn't seem as sexy as it did at that moment.

When we went outdoors, the cool air combined with the alcohol in my system caused a shiver to go down my entire body. At the same time, I could feel the alcohol sparking within me as it interacted with the cold air. We continued walking together with our hands connected while we looked for a taxi, but none of us spoke. My pulse quickened when he tightened his grip, and my thoughts became fixated on his hard hand. It was the only thing my attention could focus on at the time. Finally, we could hail a cab and hopped into the back together. Even though there was plenty of room, we chose to sit quite closely together, with one side of my body tracking his from my arms all the way down to my legs. I felt euphoric since I was in such close proximity to him.

Before I could even get out of the cab, his hands were on me; then, he backed me up and shoved me violently into the wall of his house. I jarred my shoulder, bringing me back to reality for a split second. However, after that, I ignored my more sensible side, like a parent who stays up too late. I knew that I would be kicking myself for doing it in the morning, but gosh, it sure felt wonderful right now. At that moment, I had never desired anything more than I did as he moved in to kiss me, and I saw his lips get closer to mine. I wanted to put my tongue on his wet lower lip and taste him. I wanted to taste him. I hadn't felt the want to do it until the trip home in the cab, but I couldn't wait to run my hands over his body.

Then I thought of Lucas and Kiran; before being with Kiran, I had never done anything similar to what I was doing now; in fact, since I had been with Kiran, I hadn't even looked at another man. When Rory's lips finally touched mine, I quickly drew away and smacked him across the face with both hands. My palm burned as it moved from his face to my lips, which he had only moments before violated. He took a few steps back in surprise, heavily breathing as he stood straight to keep the moonlight from reaching the area behind him. His shadow looked like a rabid werewolf on the wall next to me.

I yelled out, "I can't believe I'm married!"

He did not talk at any point; rather, he ran his hands over the short hair on his head and continued to breathe in a deep and loud manner. His gaze was drawn downward toward the earth. It appeared as though he was engaged in a struggle with his own thoughts, and the anxious movement of his feet on the mud below us reflected this.

"I'm married," I said over and over again.

And then an odd event occurred over which I had no feeling of control. I charged at him and brought his face close to mine as I did so. I gave him a passionate, passionate, and sexual kiss, unlike any other kiss I had ever given to anybody else. As he loosened up, he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into a more intimate position. It seemed as though we were physically incapable of coming much closer to one another. I could taste the delicious alcohol on his breath via his tongue in my mouth. I desired him, and I desired every part of him. As his hands searched beneath my top, he kissed the back of my neck and moved down to my shoulders. My hands gently stroked his body, and when I tugged at his top to remove it, he elevated his arms so I could do so. As I kissed his tanned chest, I let my tongue and fingers explore every inch of his upper body. I was completely captivated. Because we were standing so close to one another at this point, I could feel the bulge in his trousers pressing up against me.

He disengaged himself from the tangled situation. "Let's head in," he said to himself. I tried to turn back, but it was too late; I will always blame the drink, but there was more to it. He was like a narcotic to me, and I couldn't get enough of him.

When we entered his bedroom, I began to feel dizzy, and when we were inside, I immediately sank into his bed, and I believed that I had fallen asleep there.