- ISOBEL - Guilt. I’m laying down on a bed with people by my side pushing the bed I’m on forward. My vision is blurred and I can’t make sense of my environment but all I can see is white and so many lights. What happened? I hear the sound of my breathing. It’s loud. Almost like my mouth and nose are enclosed in something I can’t wrap my head around. I want to move but I can’t. My hands feel glued to the moving bed even though I know they’re not. I may be partially out of touch with my environment and my body but one thing I can tell is there’s nothing binding my body to anything. Where’s Nina? Where’s Cameron? My eyes close. They slowly open. I’m not moving anymore yet the lights are still as blinding as ever. I squint, trying to block excessive light from reflecting on my face. Why is there some kind of guilt eating me up like something bad happened to them and it’s my fault? My head turns to the side. Someone’s standing by my side. I try to move my fingers out
- ISOBEL - I couldn’t catch my breath all through the drive. He managed to break every bit of composure in my body with just a few sentences. Did he just ask me out? Well, indirectly. My mind is in scrambles and I can’t fully wrap my head around what happened in his car. ‘See you later, angel.’ Still replays in my mind, that’s the last thing he said when I got out of his car. My eyes roll in my socket as I bite my lower lip. He did what I didn’t have the courage to do!! I try to hide my blush with my hair by pushing strands of hair over my face as I walk through the pedestrian walkway in my estate. I couldn’t let him drop me home and lied I was going to meet with a friend. If Cain was home and even sighted just a bit of his car from a distance with me in it, he would act out. I can’t risk Cain acting out and ruining my chances. Not anymore. He’d destroy things before it even starts. I turn back to look around, checking for traces of his car, when I found none, I stare
- NINA - “Don’t you dare answer that.” Cain’s voice resonates in my ears as he makes his presence known from behind me in the café. My heart skips a beat when I hear him and my body hair stands. He sits opposite me, on the seat tucked in the double seater table I’m sat, staring at me menacingly with a dark grin. He was monitoring her chat again. This disgusting pig! My nose flares up and I feel my brows furrow with a frown. I hang up, ending the incoming call before it even started. “You’re a grown man Cain.” I say, clenching my fists and leaning comfortably in my seat. My stance, although easy, holds authority. “Stop playing petty games and get a life.” A half smile forms on my face. The one that shows how utterly disgusted I am at him. “This is my life.” An eerie smirk follows that darkened tone, making me nervous but I don’t show it. I lean closer, resting my torso on the table with one of my elbows pressing the table to support my pose. My legs cross underneath the ta
- ISOBEL -I look at my maps then at the time on my cell phone as I step into the café. This is the one. Nina should be here somewhere. I run my eyes around the eating area, looking for the lady who both pissed me off and made me worried at the same time. I swear she’ll get what’s coming to her but I have to find her first.My lips flatten as I still search for her, examining the café. I can’t find traces of her. Not even one. I can’t even hear her voice in the midst of the chatter here. Although scantier than the one I usually go to stalk Cameron, the not-so-subtle noise in this place is unmissable.I look at my phone and unlock my screen, heading to my chat with Nina. I want to alert her of my arrival.“She’s here.” A man’s voice trail in my ears. This makes me sigh, if I didn’t know too well, I’d say it was familiar. Eerily familiar. Pfft. I roll my eyes. Amongst the sea of people, someone raises her hand up. I try my luck and look at the person. Seeing her ginger hair now, I’m
- CAMERON -Have you ever felt so insanely relieved and happy for no reason at all? That moment when you wake up and your day already feels like it’s going to be perfect and you can’t help but smile while doing the needful chores and everything else that needs to be done? That’s how feel today and the reason is none other than the lady I ran into yesterday. The one I dropped off, Isobel. For a woman to have me feeling this good despite the other shit going on in my life, she must be something. And I can already tell that Isobel surely is something extraordinary. Or it’s just my dick talking. I stare at my reflection in the mirror as I put on a tie. I’m knotting it around my neck, underneath the collar of my white, long sleeve shirt which is tucked well inside my black, inner suit. I doubt that, I say, responding to my earlier thought. She’s insanely attractive, yes, but I doubt my attraction towards her is solely sexual. Or is it? I wouldn’t know till I bed her and I don’t know wh
- ISOBEL - I’m not working today. Not after how shaken I was by yesterday’s run in with Cain. Laying on my bed with my tummy pressed on the sheets and eyes glued to my laptop, I’m researching ways to start a fire. Secure ways without leaving trails. If there’s one thing I am bad at doing other than approaching a long, lost crush, it’s committing a crime. I need to have thorough information if I want this to work and the internet is the best place for research. I scribble something down on my sketchpad. Gasoline. I need lots and lots of gasoline in the house. Since I can’t get my hand on Chlorine trifluoride, it’s what I’ll work with. My thumb make it’s way to my teeth and I chew on my finger tip. I have a long list of things written down here. I’ll have to review this list and choose the ones which are best suited for me. The ones I can buy without catching alarming awareness.I also need to think of a way to get mom out of the house when I pull this whole charade. I don’t like h
ISOBEL'S POV I am running. Not in the woods like a normal cliché movie, but past blocks of apartments of a poor neighborhood. My heart beats faster with each step I take forward and every step sends spikes of pain through my skull, but I refuse to let it slow me down. When every limb in my body is on the brink of collapsing, one agonising headache won't be a reason for me to stop running. I can't stop. If I do... only God knows what will happen to me. My lips part, releasing a sharp breath that morphs into a scream. Despite the intensity of my cry for help, it feels as though no one hears me amidst the pursuit. That can't be right. People live in these buildings. Everyone knows everyone's business. Gossip is easy to spread around in this area. I know that because I lived here once. Yet it seems like no one was calling the police. The quietness of the night proves it. This is a very small neighborhood and the cops would speed up here if a crime is reported, there was nothing th
- ISOBEL - Something about having money makes you addicted to it. The scent. How it feels in your fingers. The respect it can give and no matter how much you have, you just want more. Greed kills the good girl training in you and you find yourself doing what you never thought you would. But you enjoy it, of course. For once, you want to be a bad girl and dine with rich men. Enjoy luxury with a fake smile. Not that you hate it, but because you have to smile to get more. The lust in the eyes of men as they take your presence in, the desire pulsing through their veins, and knowing you're wanted and needed does things to one's mind. It reshapes the mind to bask in the moment. It makes what's wrong become right, after all, it aids with escaping the painful truth of your tragic life. That's why I'm in a fucking club, half naked, dancing in front of them. Because it fills a hole in my heart not love, care or family can give. I pour wine on my body and swirl my head backwa
- ISOBEL - I’m not working today. Not after how shaken I was by yesterday’s run in with Cain. Laying on my bed with my tummy pressed on the sheets and eyes glued to my laptop, I’m researching ways to start a fire. Secure ways without leaving trails. If there’s one thing I am bad at doing other than approaching a long, lost crush, it’s committing a crime. I need to have thorough information if I want this to work and the internet is the best place for research. I scribble something down on my sketchpad. Gasoline. I need lots and lots of gasoline in the house. Since I can’t get my hand on Chlorine trifluoride, it’s what I’ll work with. My thumb make it’s way to my teeth and I chew on my finger tip. I have a long list of things written down here. I’ll have to review this list and choose the ones which are best suited for me. The ones I can buy without catching alarming awareness.I also need to think of a way to get mom out of the house when I pull this whole charade. I don’t like h
- CAMERON -Have you ever felt so insanely relieved and happy for no reason at all? That moment when you wake up and your day already feels like it’s going to be perfect and you can’t help but smile while doing the needful chores and everything else that needs to be done? That’s how feel today and the reason is none other than the lady I ran into yesterday. The one I dropped off, Isobel. For a woman to have me feeling this good despite the other shit going on in my life, she must be something. And I can already tell that Isobel surely is something extraordinary. Or it’s just my dick talking. I stare at my reflection in the mirror as I put on a tie. I’m knotting it around my neck, underneath the collar of my white, long sleeve shirt which is tucked well inside my black, inner suit. I doubt that, I say, responding to my earlier thought. She’s insanely attractive, yes, but I doubt my attraction towards her is solely sexual. Or is it? I wouldn’t know till I bed her and I don’t know wh
- ISOBEL -I look at my maps then at the time on my cell phone as I step into the café. This is the one. Nina should be here somewhere. I run my eyes around the eating area, looking for the lady who both pissed me off and made me worried at the same time. I swear she’ll get what’s coming to her but I have to find her first.My lips flatten as I still search for her, examining the café. I can’t find traces of her. Not even one. I can’t even hear her voice in the midst of the chatter here. Although scantier than the one I usually go to stalk Cameron, the not-so-subtle noise in this place is unmissable.I look at my phone and unlock my screen, heading to my chat with Nina. I want to alert her of my arrival.“She’s here.” A man’s voice trail in my ears. This makes me sigh, if I didn’t know too well, I’d say it was familiar. Eerily familiar. Pfft. I roll my eyes. Amongst the sea of people, someone raises her hand up. I try my luck and look at the person. Seeing her ginger hair now, I’m
- NINA - “Don’t you dare answer that.” Cain’s voice resonates in my ears as he makes his presence known from behind me in the café. My heart skips a beat when I hear him and my body hair stands. He sits opposite me, on the seat tucked in the double seater table I’m sat, staring at me menacingly with a dark grin. He was monitoring her chat again. This disgusting pig! My nose flares up and I feel my brows furrow with a frown. I hang up, ending the incoming call before it even started. “You’re a grown man Cain.” I say, clenching my fists and leaning comfortably in my seat. My stance, although easy, holds authority. “Stop playing petty games and get a life.” A half smile forms on my face. The one that shows how utterly disgusted I am at him. “This is my life.” An eerie smirk follows that darkened tone, making me nervous but I don’t show it. I lean closer, resting my torso on the table with one of my elbows pressing the table to support my pose. My legs cross underneath the ta
- ISOBEL - I couldn’t catch my breath all through the drive. He managed to break every bit of composure in my body with just a few sentences. Did he just ask me out? Well, indirectly. My mind is in scrambles and I can’t fully wrap my head around what happened in his car. ‘See you later, angel.’ Still replays in my mind, that’s the last thing he said when I got out of his car. My eyes roll in my socket as I bite my lower lip. He did what I didn’t have the courage to do!! I try to hide my blush with my hair by pushing strands of hair over my face as I walk through the pedestrian walkway in my estate. I couldn’t let him drop me home and lied I was going to meet with a friend. If Cain was home and even sighted just a bit of his car from a distance with me in it, he would act out. I can’t risk Cain acting out and ruining my chances. Not anymore. He’d destroy things before it even starts. I turn back to look around, checking for traces of his car, when I found none, I stare
- ISOBEL - Guilt. I’m laying down on a bed with people by my side pushing the bed I’m on forward. My vision is blurred and I can’t make sense of my environment but all I can see is white and so many lights. What happened? I hear the sound of my breathing. It’s loud. Almost like my mouth and nose are enclosed in something I can’t wrap my head around. I want to move but I can’t. My hands feel glued to the moving bed even though I know they’re not. I may be partially out of touch with my environment and my body but one thing I can tell is there’s nothing binding my body to anything. Where’s Nina? Where’s Cameron? My eyes close. They slowly open. I’m not moving anymore yet the lights are still as blinding as ever. I squint, trying to block excessive light from reflecting on my face. Why is there some kind of guilt eating me up like something bad happened to them and it’s my fault? My head turns to the side. Someone’s standing by my side. I try to move my fingers out
- ISOBEL - “How long do you plan to stalk him?” Nina’s words of our conversation yesterday replays in my head. “As long as I can to know the kind of woman he likes. Know the things he’s accustomed to so I can bend my way into his life .” Was my response to Nina. I plan to be the lioness heading towards the target. It won’t be long before he succumbs to my whims once I approach him. A honk snaps me back to earth and I stare at the path I’m walking on. It’s morning. I’m making my way to my usual café with my very first and best client’s child by my side with my hand tugged well in his. James. I do have a nutrition list for every child I babysit and so far, his parents are the most fluid. James loves coming to the café with me and while part of me thinks it’s because of the cute cashier, the other part believes he enjoys the snacks here. Either way, it’s good for me. It’s my third time babysitting him this week. And my third time having the splendour of coming here. I push the
- CAMERON - Sitting at the table by the corner of a cafe, I sip my coffee. I let out an exhale, easing my mouth of the burn caused by the coffee. I look at my wrist to check the time on my watch. My siblings should be here any time soon. I’m actually anticipating this. I sigh. The past few months have been weird and these few days have been weirder. This casual meeting might actually be a good thing, and maybe father’s missing child will show up. He’s someone I’d really love to meet. Apart from Anastasia, my half sister whom I’ve already had numerous encounters with, I wonder what kind of personalities await me. Hopefully, no matter how awkward, they’ll be intriguing. Some of my step siblings have families. My lips forms a line, it’s good to know that not all of them ended up with shitty, mentally traumatised lives like I did. They found their escape. That’s something I’m hoping to find. What would be my escape though? Maybe gardening, I chuckle at my thought. For some str
- CAMERON - My alarm clock rings, waking me up. I groan, keeping my head pressed down my pillow as I stretch my arm out, reaching my bed table, to turn it off. It has been a long few days. Taking The Lawyer’s advice to have a few weeks off to clear my head is doing me good. I’m processing a lot of things. Plus, I’m finally coming to terms with father’s death. Those documents proved to be more for my healing than I expected. I’m glad he passed them on. I sigh, turning around so my body faces the ceiling. My room is dark. Every window is sealed shut by the curtains and the lights are off. I know it’s morning but I prefer to keep it this way. The grey painting of my room along with the grey sheets, tiles, bed stand, and every furniture aids with this darkness, giving my room a warm feeling. I discarded every worker at my home to enjoy my alone time to the fullest and I’ve got to admit, keeping myself busy with chores definitely aids to heal my mind. During these past few days, I