For hours she sat on the floor with a glass of whiskey in hand, but for some reason she could not bring herself to swallow the strong beverage.
She could not believe the last few hours happened, that she had the confrontation she had been dreading for years.
It left her with so much pain, anger, and hatred. The truth did not set her free, it chained her to every exchange that happened last night, and it brought back the past like a wave on the shore, making it harder to breathe without thinking about it.
For hours she hesitated whether or not she should call Blair. She was not sure whether she wanted to be in complete silence or speak to somebody about her encounter with Logan Parker. She felt lost, exposed, neglected, and abandoned. She felt naked.
She felt as though every time she stepped outside, everyone would notice, everyone would see that she was a rape victim. Her hard work would no longer count, her success would not come to her rescue, and her achievements would be tainted.
She realised that she no longer had a name, she was only a part of statistics, she was just a number in the list of unresolved cases in the world, she was a victim of an injustice not only from the man who violated her, but from the law in South Africa as well.
She knew very well the privilege of having money when it came to the justice system, money could buy anything, including freedom, rendering victims of injustices liars and opportunists. She knew how to get away with murder, did that make her any less of a victim? Perhaps less of a woman? Her head was aching from all the thinking, she had to stop feeling sorry for herself, it was no use.
She needed a distraction, and this house was the perfect distraction. She never thought she would come back here, especially after everything that had gone down, the worst being Jorge's shooting.
The house was still a mess, the helper and not been there in a long time.
She got a bucket and a mop from the storage room and started cleaning from upstairs until eventually she reached the front door where Jorge's dried blood still stained the carpet and wall. That was a mess she still needed to deal with, she had to clean up not only the mess on the floor or the wall, but take care of the whole thing and find her brother's killers and save his life. She did not want any more bloodshed, not when it came to the people she cared about.
She disposed of the water she was using to clean upstairs and then got a smaller bucket in which she poured every cleaning detergent she could find in the house. She kneeled down in front of the door and scrubbed the floor until there was no blood stain left. The cleaning detergents managed to get rid of the copper smell of the blood, but the condition in which they left the carpet was unsettling, the floorboard that was once brown was now white in colour, it was haunting like the aftermath of a nightmare, horrifying.
She threw herself on the floor and leaned against the wall where there was once blood stains, her clothes; the white pants and blouse were covered in blood.
A knock came from the door when she least expected it, but she did not bother answering, the door was not locked, the person would either get tired of knocking and leave or decide to let themselves in. She did not care, she did not even worry herself, if her brother's murderers were back then perhaps it would be better if they put an end to her, she did not want to die but it was the better option considerable.
The door creaked open, and she did not bother to look up, an immense amount of light flooded the house when the person opened the door. She saw a shadow of a man and she could recognise that scent anywhere, it made her heart soar but she felt as if the moment she allowed herself to be vulnerable, she would crack. She did not want to crack, not in his presence anyway. The last time she opened up to him, he ran off, leaving her to suffer alone in her demise.
Cameron closed the door and sat down on the floor next to her, but neither of them said a word.
They were sitting so close to each other, their bodies almost touching, and yet, it felt like there was this huge gap between them, they were like strangers, neither of them knew where to begin.
MJ wondered what dragged him out here so late in the night, but she had her guesses. "Did Blair send you out here to check up on me or did you come at your own free will?" She asked.
"She was worried about you," he said.
MJ snickered. "Of course."
"I am worried about you too." She gulped, her chest burning with undefined emotions. "Jackson tells me that you went to see Logan." Her body went rigid, and that only fueled his suspicions. "MJ, I am trying not to think of the worst but my gut tells me that something happened. I'm even scared to ask."
She took in a shaky breath and gulped, shutting her eyes. "I lost control and let my emotions take over," the words slipped out of her mouth before she could stop herself. There it was, the vulnerability she allowed herself to feel when he was around. "I wish I could turn back the hands of time, that the last 24 hours did not happen. I feel so dirty... naked, like I bore my soul to him."
She waited for the pity and blame, but it never came. "How much does he know?" Cameron asked instead.
She shook her head. "Enough." Not enough, she thought.
"Are you scared that he might start looking at you differently?"
MJ frowned and tilted her head so that she was facing him. She had not done this to redeem herself, she wanted them both to hurt, and now she regretted it. "I did not go to Logan with the intention to come clean, it was an impulsive act.. I shouldn't have done it!"
As expected, Cameron was still not aware of the implications of her actions. "What could be so bad about it? I mean, at least it's out of the way now."
"Cameron, you just don't get it, do you?" She got up from the floor, and he followed her actions.
"MJ, what you did takes a lot of courage. You've been harbouring this heavy burden on your shoulders for years."
"Exactly!" She yelled, throwing her hands in the air. "And for a good reason. Cameron, once secrets start piling out, there's no stopping them! What do you think is going to happen the next time Logan sees me? He's going to want to know who did it, what do I say then? Do you know what that means?" Cameron's face paled as his head started working. "Exactly! Just get the hell out of here, Cameron, you can tell Blair that I'm better than ever." She turned around and ran up the stairs.
She got to her room and got out of the bloody clothes, and then ran a shower. She heard Cameron's car veer to life, and her heart sank in disappointment. He was never here to stay, he only came because Blair asked him to, otherwise, he did not care. She had to remind herself that she had no one in this world, she was all alone and she had to fight for her survival.
She stepped into the shower and relaxed as soon as the water hit her body. She reminded herself that she was stronger than this, she would overcome whatever obstacles life set in her way.
What was the definition of hell? Was it a place, a person, or was it reliving the same nightmare over and over again? For Javier Mendoza, it was all of the above.Javier Mendoza was forty-five this year, and in a few weeks, it would be thirty-two years since the massacre, thirty-two years since he lost his parents, and that was something that he would never heal from.Rodrigo and Reina Dos Santos. He could never forget those two names, they were the root of his nightmares, and for years, he had dreamt of the day he would exact his revenge against them for murdering his family. Since the night of Aaron McEnroe Senior's party, he had been reminiscing about how he was going to get back at MJ, he imagined all the ways he could punish her for everything she had done to him these past few days. However, it was nothing compared to what he felt when one of the girls, Naira, told him that they saw someone that resembled Reina Dos Santos at the hospital.He could not believe what he was hearin
She barely made it out the front door when a loud scream pierced through the night like a wounded beast on a full moon, pained, angry, and desperate.Her feet were like jelly as she leaned on the door, gathering her breath as her chest rose up and down laggardly. She stood up straight and exhaled, switching on her phone before striding to her car, where two of Logan's guards were standing."Will you be able to drive home by yourself, Miss?" One of them asked.MJ gave him a small smile. "I'll manage, thank you," she said, accepting her car keys from the second guard. "Drive safely, Miss," He said with a slight bow before they both walked away.MJ got into the car and released a deep breath, leaning back in her seat. Her phone vibrated on her lap, but she ignored it.She could not believe she confessed all that to him without falling apart, especially when that was the first time she ever shared her experience out loud with another person in years, not even her therapist. She was rel
He was falling deeper way too quickly, but for Logan Parker, this was nothing new to him as MJ made it out to be, it was like continuing from where they left off all those years ago. He loved her even more than he did back then, and he was prepared to love her even more each day.Name his second favourite thing in this world after design, and it would probably be her kisses. Well, he enjoyed kissing and just being in her presence. It scared him, but he loved it.Funny how he swore that he would never let a woman to get close enough and put himself in that position again, having someone holding all the power to either build or break you and he had given that power to MJ Billings did they he declared his love for her it was a cross he had to carry for eternity. He was afraid of losing himself to her but mostly and he was also afraid of losing her.So have we decided what we are going to cook yet? MJ look up from the magazine she was reading they were currently in the kitchen and Logan
There was a point back in the beginning of their relationship, where David had been eager for Lola to be a housewife, and became quite insistent after they got married and had their first child.Lola had thought about all the benefits of being a stay-at-home mom, but she had also thought about the freedom she would lose if she chose to sit at home and spend his money than making her own. Years later, when their relationship reached an all time blow, her decision to work turned out to be the best decision she could have ever made. David lost his way and gave in to the party life, friends, alcohol, women, spending money like he was eating candy on Halloween; and in the midst of it all, he forgot about his family.Now felt like the perfect time to take him up on his offer, there was something satisfying about watching someone doing everything around the house. Her mother-in-law had moved back with her husband, she had insisted on giving them space to bond. As if she could ever dream of
That was what she was, she was pathetic. Whatever made her think she could trust him again?MJ was embarrassed to say the least. Her mind was replaying Kyle's face like a broken record. He saw it, he realised where Logan was going and he was relieved when she asked him to stop the car on the side.She had also started to recognize the road signs and side buildings from the time she went to see Shannon, and she realised where they were headed. Or in particular, where Logan was speeding off to.He was going to see her, he was going to Lola's house.She did not want to jump to conclusions, but she could not help feeling like he was making a fool out of her again. She could not understand when she became so insecure, a part of her wanted to go home and forget this happened, but the bigger part of her wanted to know what he was going to do there.She hailed a cab and hopped in."Where to, Miss?" The driver asked. "I don't know the place that well. But just drive straight ahead, I'll direc
She was amazed at how she managed to stay calm throughout all these months, considering what a mess she was. Last night was the ultimate straw, everything Samantha had said was as if she was reading straight from Jorge's diary, except, he never had one.Sonya had dedicated all her life to him, she gave him everything even when she had nothing. For the first time in years, she was not ashamed to admit that she hoped marrying Jorge would save her from her pending poverty, even though she never loved him because of his wealth before. If anything, it was the only thing she hated about him since they met back in highschool because he attracted crowds, and especially, women. He had quite a streak when she met him, he was a badboy as many would put it, a heartbreaker, someone who slept around and toyed with girls' hearts. It was an instant turn off for Sonya, he chased after her for months while she continued giving him the cold shoulder, until eventually, he charmed his way to her heart, a