Her expression got very serious. “I don’t believe so. I believe… I believe he has seen the error in his father’s ways—at least, some of them,” she said, though I didn’t like the way she wasn’t meeting my eyes.
“Maya—”
“Jesse, this is… you’ve achieved something that none of the females in Cazz’s Royal line have done. You’ve captured your mate’s heart. And gathered his power. This is… stunning.”
I was too busy thinking back through all my conversations with Cazz, all those memories he’d shown me, trying desperately to remember if he’d ever actually said he wouldn’t make our kids do the same thing.
…Cazz stepped right up, standing over me, staring righ
~ JESSE ~Maya let me go almost an hour later than usual, “to make up for my tardiness.” By the time I literally ran out of her cave, I was aching for Cazz, and also angry, and terrified. It was such a confusing turmoil in my chest and body because the longer I was away from him, the more my flesh ached to have him again—but knowing what I knew now about how an Heir was selected…It made me cold.I couldn’t stop thinking about the grief he’d had in his eyes when he talked about killing his siblings—and also the intensity when he spoke about reaping the benefits of it.I hadn’t understood at the time, I’d been consumed with wanting to help him stop beating himself up, but maybe… maybe the reason he felt bad about it was because even though he hated it, he didn’t w
~ CASIMIR ~The moment I got her in the door of her rooms, she yanked her hand out of my grip and turned on me.“This isn’t negotiable, Cazz!” she hissed.‘In the bond!’ I snapped back. ‘This is not a conversation for anyone else to be a part of—make certain your mind is closed to everyone, Jesse. There are things I need to explain that are not for other ears or minds to hear.’Her lips pursed and she folded her arms, glaring at me, but she did as I asked.
~ JESSE ~I wasn’t sure what was happening to me. Everything Cazz said terrified me. But every thought, every breath that felt frightening, every weight in my gut that felt like it should push me back and away from him, only shoved me closer to him.I needed him, not for gratification, but because it was only in that place, when we were both abandoned, that I felt utterly sure of him. And I needed to feel sure of him.So, when I fell into his chest and kissed him, when he wrapped his arms around me and sighed with relief, something in me remained desperate. Jittery and insecure—like he was pulling away and I had to fight to keep him close.
~ CASIMIR ~I lay back in that chair like I had been shot, with Jesse draped over me, my breath ragged, my skin sweaty, and my mind stunned. Every muscle felt fatigued, every limb heavy. And yet…There had never been a time in my life when a female’s warmth and weight over me hadn’t felt like a danger. I’d always preferred to take them from behind to keep control—and because it put me in position to overwhelm them if it was necessary. Yet, holding Jesse there, being held by her…She was an embrace. A joy. Not a threat.Neither of us spoke for some time, both letting our breathing return. I had a han
~ CASIMIR ~When I reached the chamber I was surprised to find the entire council assembled, but I realized I shouldn’t have been. Ghere would have called them the moment a messenger from Rake was announced, intending to assess the information he brought and see if it required my immediate attention.He had no memory of the fact that I had schemes afoot with Khush, or that Rake knew details the others didn’t.No wonder he was so perturbed that the messenger wanted only to speak with me. He would find it odd for Rake to make that request, so would assume the messenger was being overly fastidious. I needed to be very, very careful how I handled this.“Where is he?” I asked the moment I walked into the chamber, while the others were still
~ CASIMIR ~‘Not, er, righteous?’ I sent carefully. ‘How so?’‘He… he goes to the church and appears just like they do and as I would expect the King’s Cleric to behave—careful with his words, clean, kind, righteous in his manner. Then… then he goes to deal with the humans you sent him to and he is… aggressive. Dark. Cunning. The difference is quite stark and I just… I wasn’t sure that you knew. This hypocrisy… I worried he might be deceiving you.’I had to fight to keep my face expressionless. ‘You’ve seen this with your own eyes?’
~ JESSE ~Late that afternoon my nerves were getting the better of me. I’d killed as much time as I could—I had hunted down Reeca and had another conversation about whether or not I should commend her at the Selection.Because the rite had been postponed, she’d admitted that she was trying not to get attached to the idea. But she had agreed that if she was the wolf I chose, she would accept the honor. Then I had gone to the library and read the histories like Maya told me too—but found the whole experience chilling now, seeing all those “deceased” markers in the bloodlines.I’d had to remind myself that Cazz had at least promised he wouldn’t push our children to it. But with everything that had been happening around him, it was all coming home to me now how diff
~ JESSE ~Something was strange about him, but I didn’t even think, just ran to him trying my hardest not to look like a child as he straightened, smiling, when I threw myself into his chest.He wrapped those big arms around me and lifted me off my feet, burying his face in my neck, one arm laid up my spine, the hand cradling the back of my head and holding me to him.To my surprise, I felt the bond thrum as we both clung, wordlessly. And I realized… I realized he’d felt as frantic to be together as I had. But he’d covered it somehow, until this moment.I had to swallow back a pinch of happy tears, but I did it, so that when we finally relaxed and he put me down on my feet again before straightening to smile down at me, I could beam back at him.
~ CASIMIR ~I was pretty sure if I didn’t get inside her, I was going to eat her alive.Scooting with her in my lap, still straddling me, I got her so both my knees and her back were flat against the wall. Then I flipped open the wide, leather cuffs that had been secured directly to the wall and first lifted one of her hands, to strap it in so her hand was levered above her shoulder, but with her arm comfortably bent so she could relax. Then I did the same with her other hand on the other side.So I straddled the banana-seat, while she straddled me and her hands were secured to the wall behind her.Her breasts rose and fell with her heavy breathing, and her eyes were bright with desire.Overwhelmed again with how much thought she’d put into this, for a moment I just took her face in my hands and kissed her. But that drew us together—my cock pressing against her, and I couldn’t resist rolling my hips, teasing
~ CASIMIR ~“I made a new Den,” Jesse whispered, her hands over her mouth, staring up at me—those beautiful eyes wide, but also a little fearful. “I know it’s not the same, but I got Ghere to help me because he remembered what things you’d had before and… I hope you like it.”Like it? Was she serious?My heart was slamming against my ribs, and I was having trouble breathing.The room seemed smaller than I remembered because the walls were painted a dull black. But the tighter space than what I’d had down next to the Den just made it feel more intimate.There were two lamps, one on each end, and a chandelier high above. Candles everywhere, though she hadn’t lit mo
~ JESSE ~It was Cazz’s turn to plan the monthly date. But I was humming about this one. Things were finally ready, and impossibly, Ghere had helped me successfully pull off the surprise. But I still had to figure out how to get Cazz there without ruining it.He’d taken me out to the meadow again—my favorite date. Though we’d enjoyed several others now too—and we’d just finished eating. He was leaning back against the cab of the truck, looking out at the city lights, his brows a little heavy.“What are you thinking about?” I asked him, though I had a hunch.He had his arm around me and I was leaning on his shoulder. His hand trailed up and
~ CASIMIR ~I came out of the bathing room after a long bath rubbing my hair with a towel, to find my mate standing in the middle of the chamber with her arms folded and looking sternly at my daughter, who sat on the floor in nothing but a diaper, with her chubby legs straight out. She, too, had her arms folded and her lips pursed in the perfect reflection of her mother.The two glared at each other and half my heart went cold, while the other half wanted to splutter with laughter.“Abigail, I have told you—”“No!”Our daughter could only get her tongue around a few words so far, but
~ JESSE (a few weeks later) ~I had just finished nursing Abigail and was holding her on my lap while Reeca sat with me on the couch.Her eyes were bright and she was beginning to smile, so I was tickling her cheeks to see if I could get her to do it. But she was sleepy because she’d just eaten and only yawned and cooed.“She’s a very calm baby,” Reeca commented from the other end of the couch, smiling. She loved babies, and had been so helpful when I was tired—and just for reassurance for me.She was a calm presence in any room, and with Abigail, she showed a lot of delight and joy that she seemed to stifle in other areas of her life.“Reeca,” I said carefully, because I’d b
~ JESSE ~I was too tired to do more than lift my hands to his neck, so I just curled my face into his chest and let him settle us into the chair, cradled in his arms with my ass in his lap.When he’d sat, I had my head resting on his shoulder and my body curled in his arms.“Do you hurt?” he asked quickly.“No, just tired, like I said.”I felt him relax a little then and another chill started in my blood.“Cazz… what’s happened?” I asked quietly.He turned his head to meet my eyes and lifted his hand to comb hair back from my face. His throat bobbed, but his touch was g
~ JESSE (Hours later) ~My dreams were disturbing—my body in pain, screams of terror, darkness, the floor shaking, the mountain falling, humans fleeing and wolves…I tried to break free, tried desperately to open my eyes and to speak, because I knew I was asleep. But all I did was fade… in and out. The nightmares, or nothing.And through it all, his voice.“Heal… live.”My heart ached. My body hurt. My chest didn’t want to expand. It was as if my flesh fought his words, and I didn’t understand.But finally, the dreams faded and I could hear a heartbeat. Little, and quick. And feel warm flesh. And the breath of my m
~ CASIMIR ~I felt the moment the power went out of Jesse. The entire mountain felt it.I howled with triumph and shifted, sprinting towards the room, ecstatic when there was no sense of Maya gripping my mind or stealing anything from me. But of course, there was no power left for her to steal.I prayed and pleaded and ran, Rory and the others coming in my wake. And the moment I broke through that door in my wolf—the only power left to me anymore—everything slowed. Though my body whipped and my mind was singularly focused, it was as if everything happened in slow motion.I caught a bare glimpse of Jesse on the bed, and at first my heart leaped. She was moving, awake, aware,
~ JESSE ~Maya had me sitting up in the bed, curled forward, gripping my knees. Reeca on one side, helping prop me up, a guard on the other.My body was nothing but a conduit for pain. Wave after wave, my entire lower body condensing, contracting, pushing to get this baby out. I could barely think.Cazz was there, so quiet, so distant, but there, calling his encouragement and pushing love at me through the bond.There was a moment when I thought I wouldn’t make it, when I thought my body would give and I would just drift away.But then I caught Maya smiling. Leaning forward between my legs, reaching, grasping, for