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Chapter Twenty-One - Khai
Last Updated:
2025-01-28 17:53:00
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She Was The Queen Chapter Twenty-Two - Khai
Inside my bathroom, Roman watched the water thrust itself out of the tap with curious bright eyes. The tap was ancient, possibly older than I was with plumbing twice older. She sat at the edge, her feet outside the tub. She was calm as a still breeze. Innocent little swirls formed in the water when she stirred it with her hand. She was exquisite."What are you thinking about?""For once, nothing," she said.We both watched the water fill the tub and dipped our grimy feet into the tub as we sat on the edges, turning the water a darker shade than transparency. She swung her feet mildly in a tender manner as she looked down at the water.I found myself reaching down to her feet, gripping one foot. She gasped lightly, that tender shock of a gasp. Our eyes met, she had a blank expression with parted lips and breathed through them.I listened carefully to her breath and heart beat which was moving at a hundred and eighty."May I?" I asked.She took her time to register, blinking rapidly whe
Last Updated : 2025-01-28She Was The Queen Chapter Twenty-Three - Khai
After her confession, I felt like a shell. I left for a glass of water but found the living room so deliciously empty I sat in there, watching the dark TV for hours.I hated pretending and putting up in front of perfection.When she first arrived, I hoped she would be the only person I wouldn’t need to pretend to. She was to be a blank slate, a chance for someone to know me from scratch without the history and prequel. I had an opportunity to make an impression and I blew it. She could see the cracks in my personality—the inconsistencies. I couldn’t help it. I took my pills after the battle. I too could feel I acted rash and incredibly inconsistent. I couldn’t imagine how it felt to encounter me, imagine being attached to me.How silly it was of me to convince myself I didn't need the pills anymore. I guess I didn't need them when I had no one too close to me, as close as she was getting. But I could see the effect I had on her. The way my words and behaviour would confuse her or drain
Last Updated : 2025-01-29She Was The Queen Chapter Twenty-Four
It was a ghastly place - that’s why I hated the city. Things always got out of hand, with trash everywhere and potholes. Though it was covered in snow you could tell the place was rundown and possibly older than two generations.The building stood alone at the edge of town, made of red bricks and grey cement paths. Khai and Walter got out of the car and started hauling the big packs of rice and flour out of the car and they told me to take as much of the smaller stuff as I could.Behind the walls I could hear small footsteps running around, screams of joy – a chorus of children. Walter set two knocks on the door and a tired old woman opened the door. Grey hair and a long black dress, sparing no skin. She appeared to be a nun.“Shekhaina, so good to see you boy.”She pulled him into a hug. Khai was all smiles when he set the pack of rice on the ground and embraced her.Shekhaina. What a beautiful name.“Walter,” she beamed and hugged him too.She placed several kisses all over his face.
Last Updated : 2025-02-01She Was The Queen Chapter Twenty-Five
Walter and I went indoors. The nun lady offered us some hot chocolate and we drank it in the kitchen. Her name was Emelda and she was so sweet my teeth hurt.I could see Khai from here, reading a story to 10 to 15 children seated on the mat before him in the living room. He was so animated, doing the voices and everything. I tried not to stare.“Can I be honest with you?” I asked Walter.Walter faced me and nodded. I was afraid he’d tell Khai everything. Khai could force it out of him but I needed someone to talk to.I hesitated. His eyes were true and curious. He was the best option. I hardly saw him around so I hoped that would be advantageous. Hopefully, he wouldn't be around enough for Khai to pry.“This whole mate thing, it’s confusing. I hardly know him but I feel like I can trust him. I want him but I’m also afraid of him. Do you get that?”“That’s how it is at first. Humans call it love at first sight. You see someone and instantly know you love them then you get to know them
Last Updated : 2025-02-01She Was The Queen Chapter Twenty-Six - Khai
And there it was—that look defined by pity. I slid my hand out of hers as she scowled at me.The snow had a better look. Indifference. Never pity. She'd soon become like the rest of them, watching me, waiting for a break. Concerned. Worried. Saddened."I'll kill him," she muttered.Her hand was in a fist, her jaw clenched."Where did he even get the gall?" her voice grew louder as she became infuriated."That's vile. It's disgusting Khai. Is he still alive?"I nodded slowly. I was surprised. No one had ever reacted like that. I expected a sorry. An apology but none of that. Rage. Just as I had felt. All-consuming rage."Let's find him.""Roman," I whispered.That's insane, I wanted to say. Crazy. It's old news, it doesn't even bother me anymore. I don't care about him. He's probably in jail by now. I can't be living in the past. All these things I wanted to say but I said none of them. I said nothing.We couldn't kill a human. They are so helpless. A sickness would get him. Such vile
Last Updated : 2025-02-01She Was The Queen Chapter Twenty-Seven - Khai
When we got home the house was dark. Everyone had gone to sleep. We tiptoed poorly through the house, giggling like teenagers who'd snuck out right under mommy and daddy's noses. Roman bumped her elbow against the corner of the counter and hissed in pain. I covered my mouth and I laughed at her."It's not funny," she whispered."It is," I laughed.The stairs seemed to creak louder than they'd ever creaked in their lives. Each step the wood yawned and stretched.In the room she went to the bathroom and put on a night dress. I wore my own pyjamas and she came out of the bathroom in my mother's old night dress."You look like someone's grandmother," I said."Glad I'm unattractive to you Khai," she said with a mischievous grin and sat on her side of the bed.She began tying her hair up and I watched her merticulously. How she held and picked up each lock into the velvet hair tie. She had her back to me so I could just stare. The night dress was big so when her arms were raised the sleeves
Last Updated : 2025-02-03She Was The Queen Chapter Twenty-Eight
Yolanda and I discussed the matter of Grace's accommodation. Khai didn't even want to come; he stayed in his room. I wore Yolanda's jeans and a white top."She will just take back her old room back. I didn't even touch it," I sighed."As long as it’s cool with you," Jacob said, we were in their room.It was a large room that smelled of autumn leaves that had been basking in the Sun all day. We sat on the three-seat couch by the frosted window."Yeah I mean, I'll have to sleep with Khai eventually,” I said plainly.Jacob smiled playfully at me."Sleep with him," he laughed."Gosh, Jacob!" I exclaimed, blushing.Yolanda laughed from their bathroom."Why are you silly?" I asked him."It's just the way he is," Yolanda said.She came out, wiping her face with a towel. They hugged each other and kissed. Their love was so obnoxious, you didn't need to be a genius to see. It was too much."How did you guys meet?"They turned their attention to me. Jacob smiled."Jacob and I have been in this
Last Updated : 2025-02-03She Was The Queen Chapter Twenty-Nine
"I like this dress, maybe you will look good in it too."I looked up from biting my lips, at Yolanda who held a floral dress to her body."It's short, it's still winter," I said mindlessly.I wasn't paying attention.It didn't make sense now did it? How I could be so close to Khai yet so distant? We slept in the same room yet I'd get butterflies thinking of what to say next."Oh come on, winter will be over in a month or so, you even said it,” she said walking to me from the other side of the clothing rack."I don't know." I shook my head.We were at a large shopping mall uptown, in an independent clothing store called Flora's. I had suggested we get in here but I couldn't focus. All that presented itself before my eyes was Khai's body - a shirt shifting off his body before bed, then he'd slip on his navy blue pyjama shirt and smirk at me, and read a book as I fell asleep. His scent remained in my nose though he was miles away at home. I could still smell him, craved him like a vice. I
Last Updated : 2025-02-03
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She Was The Queen Chapter Hundred and Twenty-Six
I reached out for her and she moved her hand away. That's when I knew there was division between us."Do you know what you sound like?" she said as she glared at me.I shrugged helplessly."A colonizer.""Excuse me?" I breathed.I wasn't sure if I heard her right."I should've listened to Malcolm. You've made Malcolm a reliable source. Do you know how insane you need to be to make Malcolm sound reliable?" she shouted.The workers around us watched us and all the harvesting had stopped. Audrey saw the eyes and closed the space between us and lowered her voice."How dare you use Khai's name to justify your schemes," she said through clenched teeth."This is not my scheme Audrey. I don't want this either but Khai said-""How dare you?"Her eyes became glossy and she jabbed a finger in my chest."Doing that will eradicate everything that makes us Traga. You came in here and usurped our leader and now you
She Was The Queen Chapter Hundred and Twenty-Five
Winter covered the garden with its cold whiteness and a few months breezed past. The trees grew bare with leaves and frostbite crept up my fragile human toes.I never had to worry about these things when I spent every day and night as a wolf. My fur always kept me warm but as a human, which I spent most of my time as - I found sickness and shivering to be commonplace.They were generous with the mourning period but time was running out. I couldn't avoid the subject of marriage to Malcolm any longer. Eventually, the elders would end their kind silence and come to the house again.Intimidated and confused, I had said yes to marrying Malcolm under the condition that they would lend me the guard dogs in my fight against the Azraels. They had done that for me.This was against my moral code. Growing up, my father taught me to keep my word but then I felt Khai, heard him in my head and promised him I’d never marry Malcolm and see the plan through - my mor
She Was The Queen Chapter Hundred and Twenty-Four
It became apparent why I was here. Why it was the doorstep of the Tragas I fell upon. It was for this moment right here. Khai and I were nothing but collateral, a means to an end.I was but a small cog in the machine, a pawn in a chess game played by the gods. Traga was willing to sacrifice himself to Yaga so his children would get stronger and live longer. My blood would certainly guarantee that.After Khai left my mind and body I felt lonely. Lonelier than I’d ever been or believed was possible. I sat in the desert crying for what felt like an hour as the black hole in my chest gaped wider.I saw them looking for me in the distance and I ran to hide so I could cry all the cowardice out of me.I couldn’t continue like this anymore. I needed to take the first step. Move out of the passive and into the active.For the first time in a long time, I got on my knees and said a prayer.Give me the strength to see these plans through. Please soften the hearts of Traga Wolves so they may rece
She Was The Queen Chapter Hundred and Twenty-Three
The night went on and I left the crowd to sit alone with my fourth drink. I wanted to cry but my body felt too tired of all the sadness and pain. Also, I was tired of forcing smiles.I walked a mile off and sat on the dirt, gazing up at the moon.I’d never given the moon much thought till I came to Traga. All I cared about before was the sun and now I was of both the sun and the moon.As I stared the moon it began to glow. I kept my gaze fixed on it and I felt my blood rushing through my veins. I stood up to my feet as my heart pounded in my chest.What was happening?It went on for a while until my chest felt warm. Tears brimmed at my eyes as I felt it again. His love. His warmth, his presence glowing from inside of me.It was Khai. How?Roman. Khai?Yes. How? I laughed, a mix of joy and tears.How was this happening. I’d never felt so whole in my life. My
She Was The Queen Chapter Hundred and Twenty-Two
Ginos was a place out of town, randomly in the middle of the dessert like area. It was made of shipping containers huddled into a circle where people could sit and have drinks. They only served barbeque meats and alcohol. The air was heavy with spices, smoke and charred meat which made my mouth salivate.I couldn’t believe the Tragas had finally managed to get me off raw meat. I couldn’t imagine eating it.We joined two tables and sat together, the loudest group in the whole place. Hannah, Falcon, Jacob, Yolanda, Audrey, Malcolm, Linda and apparently Greg was coming. The idea didn’t excite me and I felt that it was disrespectful seeing as Khai was barely gone for a week and she was already going over his head.Khai never wanted Greg around them. He could do nothing about Linda’s love for him but he made it clear he didn’t want him around other wolves.I didn’t have the energy to argue and fight a losing battle. No matter what I said, Linda would justify his presence in her head. And on
She Was The Queen Chapter Hundred and Twenty-One
The guard dogs ran ahead of me, howling in celebration. I turned my head away from the corpses and tried to convince myself I was walking back from somewhere else. But I couldn’t forget what I did, not while I had his skull in my mouth.The howls filled the air all the way back to Traga land. Outside the house many wolves in their human forms had gathered, ready to receive us. They were so excited to see us, cheering and joyful that the reign of Azraels was finally over. I placed Intiyago’s head in the middle of the garden and everyone erupted in joy.Where was my joy, I wondered. I couldn’t feel a thing.Intiyago haunted me for so long, made my life a living hell and now that I had ended him I felt no joy nor sense of completion. I entered the house and phased into a human in the kitchen.My behavior offset them but they continued to cheer and celebrate outside, hoisting Intiyago’s head and parading around with it. The house was e
She Was The Queen Chapter Hundred and Twenty
The world was red as I backed away, trying to shake the blood off my face. Intiyago walked slowly toward me. Prowling, Ravenous and angry but his eyes – his eyes were sympathetic.Roman, this is not what I want. His voice was soft in my head. He stopped in his tracks, his head lowered down and he licked drops of my blood which had fallen on a rock.No.But it was too late, his pink tongue wiped the rock clean and his eyes surged with a golden glow. A menacing growl ripped out of him.This is what I want!His voice was heavy again, dark and sharp. The sun healed the scratch and I could see properly again. I charged toward him and clawed at his face. Claw after claw I saw blood and more blood until his face was disfigured. He howled and jumped to the side where he rammed me into a tree. The impact almost broke my ribs but I got back up and gave him everything I had. I rammed him into the other tree and bit into his arm so hard I hit his bone.The painful howl he screamed satisfied me i
She Was The Queen Chapter Hundred and Nineteen
Malcolm decided to return to the funeral with a busted nose and lips. I waited on the porch for the guard dogs to appear. They said that as soon as Khai was buried we would get to go.Nothing else mattered but my vengeance, nothing at all. There was no after. I couldn’t imagine it and if I died killing all the Azraels I would be satisfied, I would’ve achieved my life’s purpose.A couple of wolves… Ten? No fifteen. Twenty-seven? Thirty! Thirty, to be exact broke out of the forest, ravenous and ready to fight. Traga guard dogs. Slightly bigger than other wolves and their legs showed that they spent their time fighting and running. These were strong wolves. I almost felt pride when I saw them coming in, if no one knew – they would’ve thought they were wild wolves.I got to my feet as family members and other Tragas came back to the house in their human forms. Hannah ran to my side.“You don’t have to do this. You’re the alpha, send them out instead. You stay.”Vomit bubbled in the back o
She Was The Queen Chapter Hundred and Eighteen
When we were out of sight he loosened his grip on me. My hand quickly found its way to his and I held it tight. I couldn’t let go of the warmth, even for a second. I still allowed my mind to play tricks on me. If I did not look at him and imagine his voice as Khai’s he would be Khai.“You can’t do that type of stuff. It’s traumatising,” he said.I knew it was wrong. I did not doubt it but I didn’t care.His other free hand ran down his face. He looked tired and sleepless. The bags under his eyes were swollen, and red cracked through the whites of his eyes. Had he not slept? I looked away from him, to the trees and anything else that would allow me to swap him out with who I wanted him to be.“That’s why we have to look at him before they shut the casket. It prevents such things.”Leaves crunched under his boots and my heels. My ankles and toes hurt.It was insane how it hadn’t been a complete year since I met Khai. I met him in winter and lost him before winter. I let go of his hand. H
