Marcus:I can't sleep, the team have pushed me out, telling me I am obsessing. I now know how Jackson felt, I want to be the one telling everyone where to go, and places to check, but my head is such a mess I know I will miss places.We tried Alex. He hasn't been at home since Anaya went missing a week ago, the whole week I tried keeping myself busy with the kids while hating myself for what I did to her."We're out again today looking for Alex." I nod at Jackson's words."You going to be okay alone?" I look at him."I have to be, the kids need me, I can't exactly do anything stupid can I?" Jackson nods, Alena walks over to me and sits down."How are you feeling?" I look at her, why does everyone keep asking me that?"I feel like someone has ripped my heart out and stamped all over it. She is the woman I never had, with the heart, I always longed for, and I just fucked all that up." I look at them, my mind reminds me that Alena is here."I'm helping. Alena is here, and she can watch t
"Tell, me what sort of things did you do as his brat to push the limits?" I look at her."I'm waiting speak." Nodding I think back."I" my words stop, what exactly have I done? I think back to something I have done, but everything was small, almost game-like."As I thought, this one." She points to a picture."She was bad, she hid his best whip and wand, for two days, total brat. Then another always did what he said but not what he meant, so for instance, unfasten the restraints brat. She would unfasten the restraints in the room, just not the ones holding him down.""My favourite one has to be when his brat laughed at his whips, asking when he was starting." I stare at her; I am nothing like that. Have I been living a lie the whole time? He said I am all three, but none of that have I done, or close."Now you're understanding. You're not a brat, not like what he needs." I feel a bit more of my falling apart; every day, her words make me realise the truth that I have been lying to mys
ANAYA:Waking up, I look around me, I am home but is this really home? I sit up and look at the room around me. My children are here sure, my husband, but was it all built on lies? Getting up I walk downstairs, Marcus's eyes on me as I grab food, sitting down, I watch the kids playing.I know I have lost myself. I feel like my body is walking around, moving and soulless. Like my soul has given up early and left me here alone to battle this. How do I fight a battle without my soul? With a heart that is broken and no longer whole? I am lost. I am all the way down, falling through the surface causing an earthquake inside me as I keep falling, crashing further down. I'm going left and right, trying to find my way back, but I can't seem to. I can feel love around me, but then it is plagued with darkness.I am lost, and no matter how much my nails scrape at the walls to break them down and get out, no matter how much blood is spilt on those walls from my fingers digging to escape, my mind
Marcus:The week has been too long, I keep trying to get her to talk, but there is nothing, it is like she has died inside. It's like looking back at myself on those dark days, every night I fear I will wake up and her body will be cold."How is she?" I look at Alena shaking my head."You need to sleep Marcus; you can't stay up all night watching her." She is right, but I can't."I know. But every day I see her, I see myself on those days I was ready to end it all, I close my eyes to sleep and all I see is her body cold, I am scared as hell I will wake up and she is gone, like really gone. I can't sleep, not until I know she is better." She nods not replying, walking into the kitchen she sits down. I need to try, walking through I sit down looking at her."Kitty." She looks at me, her face blank, nothing there at all."Talk to me Kitty, now please." I watch her, her mouth opens, but nothing happens her head lowering. I feel lost, lost on how I can help her right now, getting up I walk
Sitting at the edge of the road I hold my head in my hands, my heart pounding as I fight for breath. Is this me dying for trying to save her?"Marcus." I look up at Jackson."Come on, bro; you have been through worse, you lost Maria, you lost Alena. She is there; she is talking to you, calm down.""Losing Maria and Alena is nothing compared to this I can barely breathe. I caused it, all that is me. I didn't lie to her, but I lied to Rachel. When she asked for kids and to settle down, I told her I never wanted to. I did, I just knew her, and Maria were not the right ones." I lied, maybe had I not Rachel would have accepted it and moved on."Just breathe, look she is home, with no major injuries, she is just confused and looking for answers. You can see that Marcus.""I can, but I can see her fear that the answer won't be what she wants, which makes me want to lie and protect her. Maybe the universe is just telling me to give up? Look at how much I have been fighting for relationships t
"Right, so we work at fixing things, me proving I have changed. I do have one order though, as your Master and husband." I look at him nodding."You speak to someone about what happened, what she said and did and how you felt. Doesn't have to be me, can be Demitri, Jackson, Anaya, even Georgina or someone at Alena's business. Just someone so you're not thinking about it." I nod at him, I don't want to talk to a stranger, and it wouldn't feel right telling everyone else and not him."We will talk about what you want to do tonight, right now let's get up sort the kids and have some breakfast." Nodding I walk out of the room, Alex sat up in his crib. Walking over I pick him up and cuddle him. I feel ready to cry, sure I have been here all week, but for some reason even when I cuddled the kids I didn't feel anything. I was so lost that even holding them didn't seem to spark anything."Everything okay?" I turn and look at Marcus."Yeah, sorry." I start walking out, his hand stopping me."Y
I move standing up, slowly removing my clothes his head shaking as his eyes stay on me."Anaya, I don't want you hiding this behind the lifestyle." I shake my head climbing onto him."I'm not Master, I am not grabbing whips, a blindfold or anything. I just need to feel you.""Oh, and please call me Kitty, you saying Anaya so much feels wrong." He smiles, and his hand strokes along my face."I don't think that is a good idea, Anaya." I look at him pouting."I have ways Master, I could always just play, right here and make you watch until you do something?" My hand slowly strokes down my body, my fingers at my core rubbing. It won't be what I need, but it might get me what I need. His eyes stay fixed on me, glancing down to see my hand play as I moan. His eyes close trying to avoid watching, I have my ways.I grab his hand, moving it between my legs, pushing myself down on his fingers, my hips moving watching as his eyes open. Moans flow through my mouth."Anaya I don't think this is th
I stand in just my underwear, bending overlooking through the drawers. Clearly taking far longer than is needed to find a top and pair of trousers. I feel his hands stoke along my side, his head resting on my shoulder."Tell me, Kitty, are you happy in this situation? The life I am giving you, or are you needing more and everything with Rachel was a reason to start searching for more?" I turn looking at him confused, what does that mean? I stare at him, it clicking in my head, he thinks Rachel is my excuse to say I need more, that things with him aren't what I wanted."I am happy Master, with what you are giving me, but can you tell me something, are you not tired of saying no, and holding back when we both know you need more?" I look at him, shock covering his face."I know Master, you wanted to go slow, we have a lifetime to do everything, but is going slow really the best option or are you deep down needing more?" I'm no fool, he loves me, I am his brat. He doesn't treat me the sam
"You two look amazing together." I nod smiling at Marcus."Thanks, I'm still waiting to wake up, the last five years, just flew by." They did, and we moved into his spare house and settled down there. In 9 months, she was pregnant, and a few months later I proposed."So, we are all still waiting." I nod and laugh."Soon, let her finish the dance with Ethan, then Star will pop the balloon and you will all know, including me." I look at the balloons."There is no indication, trust me I tried looking, but you can't see what colour the confetti is, inside them." I nod and laugh."It will be a boy." I have a girl, so I can hope for a boy. He pats my shoulder and walks off."Happy wedding day Uncle Demitri." I turn and smile at Katy."Thank you, Katy, where is Jacob?" I can't remember seeing him."He is sorting out Jackson." I laugh, why would he be sorting out Jackson?"Oh, baby Jackson, yeah, my bad, that is taking some getting used to." I laugh shaking my head."Barely a baby Demitri, he
My foot taps as my eyes stay fixed on my hands, the sweat building in my palms. The faint muffled sound of talking comes from all around me as I try to stay calm. The music begins, my heart racing faster than before, I feel like running and fast. I feel the slight tap on my shoulder, turning I smile seeing Anaya walking towards me. Star by her side, holding up a wooden heart.Daddy, Mummy is coming! The words make me smile, she walks towards me, stopping Anaya smiles as Star hugs me before sitting down next to Anaya. I look at Jackson and Marcus standing next to me, the music continuing as Luna and Alex walk down together. Reaching me they both hug me, my eyes watching as they sit down. I try to calm my breathing my eyes watching the door, seeing the white moving slightly.I smile feeling the tear fill my eyes as she stops at the end of the aisle. Her brother by her side as she begins walking towards me, my smile growing as the tear falls down my cheek, Analise reaches me, her brot
"We're here Kitty." I open my eyes, and Marcus is smiling at me."Can I just go back to sleep, Master?" I laugh looking around us."No, come on, get your arse in there. Everything is sorted, we just need to unpack personal stuff. Then have food, and plan." Nodding I open the door."Plan what Master?" I was hoping for a lazy day today, I guess not."You will see, I took the bags in, the kids are playing." Nodding I get out and start walking towards the house, the fields seem to go on for miles."Right come on." Nodding I follow Marcus around the house."Like the last one, kitchen, however totally separate from the dining room, the Dining room is here, kids game room is here, utility room, living room, second living room, office, storage." I nod following him around."Right upstairs Kitty." I nod following him up."Luna's room, MJ's, Alex's, bathroom one, storage. Bathroom two, our room with bathroom, our playroom, and second playroom, spare bedroom for the next baby we have." I stop an
Standing I take my top off, the door opening as Marcus walks in.“Behave, I mean that.” I look at him laughing as he pushes me back.“Fuck behaving kitty, I have unfinished business, and I can’t get the way you looked in that corset out of my head.” I moan as his mouth presses against my neck.“The kids Master, we can wait, we will land in like an hour.” I feel his head shake as he continues kissing my neck.“Kids are sorted, happily occupied with someone, now shut up and let me fuck you.” I moan as he continues kissing down my body his hands removing my clothes. His head stops between my legs as his tongue begins to tease.“I thought you said you were going to fuck me, Master.” This isn’t fucking me. I scream as his fingers push inside me.“Shh Kitty, this place certainly isn’t soundproof and hearing you scream just makes me want to do more.” I moan nodding, his tongue continuing to tease as his fingers play, pushing me to orgasm, he stands up, my hands grabbing his clothes and remov
Walking downstairs after getting the kids in bed, Katy and Issy have left along with Georgina."Right, just adults now." Jackson looks at us as we sit down, I guess tonight me, and Marcus don't get alone either."Now they have gone. Everything is booked for the day of moving, I will be telling Liam he has a year to sort a place out. Katy is only 15, but she will want her space once the baby comes. I am hoping we can keep her at home for a year until she is 16, but if not then they will need to find a house quicker.""She is a child; she has no choice but to stay at home until you let her leave Jackson." Marcus looks at him like he is crazy."And you're right, but having a new baby is hard as an adult, never mind as a child with the thoughts of if their parents are watching their every move, plus, I want Jacob to feel at home, so it will be his house as much as Katy's" I stare at Jackson."No, I don't want anything from you." Jacob looks at Jackson shocked."No arguing, she made you pa
"Your pregnant?" Georgina appears behind us after a few minutes, Katy crying and nodding. Georgina moves and cuddles her."You will be fine, your mum and dad will be fine, just shocked that is all." Demitri escapes into the other room, sitting an hour passes as me and Georgina talk to Katy, Alena and Jackson coming back with Marcus."Okay, I am calm. I am angry as hell Katy, but I still love you. You're my baby girl like Issy." He hugs her and I see her relaxing as she cries, Marcus sitting next to me, his mouth at my ear."I calmed him down and explained she could drop any time so he should be gentler." I nod, she has months yet, I hope."Right, so I am not sure what your mum will say, but I think the way forward is to get you checked out and make sure you are okay. Then go from there, no more ignoring this, and that includes telling Jacob." Marcus smiles like something has happened."No Dad, he will hate me." Katy looks at him as the door opens, and Jacob walks in."You may need to
"Okay, so I guess I will start with part one. Katy lied to Jacob about her age, they knew each other yeah, but he wasn't sure of her age. She told him she was 16, and as you said, Katy looks a lot older, so he didn't question it." He nods listening."So, they did sleep together. She then realised her mistake when it came to her birthday. She realised he would see her cards saying 15 and see she lied, so she told him a few days before her birthday that is when he swore never to touch her again until she was 16." He looks at me confused."If Jackson and Alena paid attention, they would see her card from him has 17 on, he bought it before she told him.""Right, so that is what this is all over? She lied, okay Jacob isn't to blame I can see that, Jackson and Alena will as well, so we tell them and clear it up." I shake my head."Marcus that is part of the story, just listen you swore not to tell them." He nods, this is the part where he flips."So, I assumed like you this was all over th
Sitting I think about his words."Someone needs to talk to her Master." This can't keep happening."We have all tried, if you want to there is nothing to lose, but honestly, I can't see anything calming her, except one thing which is bad to think of Kitty, but that is the one thing that will scare her into realising she can't do this and not get hurt.""I will try, I know her a bit, not enough like you lot so maybe she will tell me? Maybe she won't but it is worth a try Master. You're all clean, go get some sleep." He needs to."I can't, Jackson is coming, and to be honest Kitty even if he wasn’t, I can't sleep. Not until I know Katy is okay, she was a mess after the fight." I nod.Making us a drink we sit down, about an hour passing as we talk about last night, Marcus telling me I was right for making him go.The door opens as Jackson walks in, Katy following. Jackson looks at Marcus shocked, I am guessing he didn't see him, he turns back to Katy."Jackson don't." I look at him, shou
Standing I wash the plates, a few minutes passing by in silence."Really Kitty?" I turn and face Marcus, what did I do? Or what have I done that he found out?"What Master?" I place the last plate on the rack and begin drying my hands."You actually were just going to do that? Wash up and go to bed and quit?""You said you were worn out Master, I am trying to behave." I am for a change."Come on Kitty, really? You didn't even question it, or mention what you had planned, nothing? Just okay." I nod, I don't want to push him if he doesn't feel like doing certain things."I am sure I did that before Kitty, you laughed at me and said like hell are we going to bed. Come back to me please Kitty." I move towards him, his head shaking."You know what I meant, if I was worn out and you laughed and said like hell are we going to bed, I would have made sure you know I meant it. I miss the crazy woman I used to have before all this, the one who would have jumped across the table and teased me for