Liy “Hmmm” i groaned against the warm cocoon. A blank feeling covered me against the chill in the air. It was comforting yet…strange? The draw of the warmth felt less and less tempting with every second that passed. Keeping my eyes closed didn't help anymore. I blinked blearily, meeting the dark ceiling. Everything felt normal. Good even. It all came back to me. Leaving the comfort of the pack, eating and falling asleep. The nightmare and then…. nothing. Nothing? Thinking about it alone was surreal. The nightmares haunted me with renewed confidence and it was strange to think about. Yet now, even though I could still recall the nightmare it didn't feel like much. I could barely recognize what happened but the terror dissolve into nothing. swearing shed seen a flash if something. drifted into silence and she felt peaceful. I blinked against the near dark state, adjusting.I felt refreshed in a way I hadn't in days. It felt satisfying, like I'd had a good night's rest
LilyMy rational side would tell me to stop, but I couldn't control my lips. Like a river it came spilling out.“No…not just two days. From the first damn moment I was kidnapped. Everywhere I went, every single place I was afraid. I thought I was being paranoid sometimes, that I was crazy but it kept on happening and in the end it was all because of you. I never wanted any of this yet here I am, suffering from night terrors daily. Is that what you wanted to hear?”The silence was deafening, ringing in my ears as I glared at him. My heart hammered in my chest and I didn't know if it was fear or anxiety, but I couldn't look away from him. I dared him to look away. To say something.He looked strange as I spotted his jaw moving against the light but I wasn't sure if it was my imagination.The seconds of silence passed and with it came a bitter swell of resignation. I scoffed, turning away.“Why would you care? You don't even see me as a proper human being. Just as something to use.” I sp
LilyI let out another sigh, basking in the sun rays that warmed my skin. This was the sole reprieve I had despite the nights I suffered. Time had passed, nearly two weeks since the first renewed nightmare but its impact hadn't waned. I had grown used to it, sometimes giving into the screams and threats in the nights, only to wake up tired, lethargic with tears in my eyes in the middle of the night. Not a day went by that I didn't suffer from it. I tried to stay awake for as long as I could to stave it off. I didn't know which was worse. Whether it was the lack of sleep itself or the empty exhaustion from the nightmares, I didn't know, yet every new day it felt slightly harder to stay up. My movements were a tad slower, the draw of sleep and the weight in my bones slightly heavier. The insomnia had even affected my eating. More times often than not, I had no urge to eat. The instinct was there, but in the face of my lethargy , everything felt dull and. If not for having to eat for
Lily “Come on…” I frowned out loud. It felt like I was going to burst at the seams at any moment and I hated it to the core. Pacing in the privacy of my bedroom only served to irritate me further. I'd promised myself to not think about it, and that held true for that moment, swept up in the serenity and warmth staying in the pack’s side of the house— I liked to call it yet. Yet when I was alone it was a different story altogether. It irked and annoyed me to the core and so I looked for the nearest distraction. One thing led to another, leading me here. I looked at the phone, hoping and waiting for a response yet none came. The numbers themselves felt offensive. My mom. It was normal for me to call her at a fixed time. Most of the time it was even the other way around, with her calling me. Rarely if ever though, was her phone switched off. That was the first kicker. I could've ignored it if not for the overarching anxiety inside me, making my mind run wild with possibi
71Lily The silence immediately after made my belly clench for a completely different reason as the place suddenly became tense. I grit my teeth to hide my apprehension.I didn't even know why I'd spoken so fast. I'd never sounded so rude before—except when it came to him and still it wasn't this harsh. Was it the insomnia brewing in me or was it because of my actual upset aimed at him for everything he'd been doing including carting me here? Or was it for myself for being too weak to avoid him or coming down?I didn't know, but it didn't stop the feeling from brewing. His presence amidst my turmoil was enough to spark my annoyance. The last thing I wanted was for him to be here.Claire was taken aback. Her usual calm expression was replaced with a parted mouth and wide eyes. Her gaze switched from mine to Alexander's, making me instinctively squeeze the sheets. “W-well…” she stammered,“I'll go.”I whipped my head in shock, facing his standing frame. His voice cut her off and his
Lily“Alright then,” Claire smiled victoriously, “I'll leave you alone now.”I smiled tiredly as she packed up her tools, taking the empty dishes with her. Under Claire's instructions — which were more like commands, I was forced to take things easy, eating constantly and sleeping or relaxing every other time in-between. She often came over to make sure I was eating well.The results were drastic. The weakness that had plagued me for weeks faded during the first few days and I felt fuller. Even though I was set on going to work the day after the first few days, the routine hadn't changed. The results of her second search were partly disappointing yet not. I should have known that sleeping pills weren't allowed for pregnant women and the last thing I wanted was to endanger him in the first place. She gave me melatonin pills in its stead which was equally as effective yet I couldn't take them constantly. I didn't mind. Some sleep was better than none at all. Although napping in the
Lily In the night, I was prepared for another round of nightmares. Skipping over the melatonin, I silently braced myself for the semi-sleepless night.I woke up as usual in the middle of darkness. I didn't feel any different nor did I have a nightmare. Sitting up, I was about to pick up my phone when th I noticed the shadow beside me A scream nearly left my lips until I realised who it was. My fears instinctively turned to anger and hostility.“How the hell are you here?” I bit out, hostile despite my racing heartbeat.On the other side of the bed, sitting on the chair, Alexander stared agape, like he hadn't expected me to be awake.‘My suspicions were correct then,’ I thought. It came together, the slight hints of scent so faint I thought, hoped, was my imagination. The occasional feeling of warmth and the strange emptiness when I woke up.Not to mention the hints of voices I heard in my dreams. Comforting words I swore were just my imagination.‘I’m here. Nothing would hurt you,’
Alexander Ever since that night she suffered the nightmare, I'd been paying more attention to her. The only things I knew or wanted to know in the past were the things that I counted as important. Things to let me take advantage of her, but now I was taking notice of everything, even if it was in our spare interactions and my glances in meeting rooms.‘She bites her pen when she's nervous.’‘She knows that I'm staring at her.’‘She's stubborn. Immensely stubborn.’‘She's better at hiding her emotions than I thought.’As I continuously offered dinner and expectantly got rejected, I still kept that in mind, noticing what she often asked for and what the pack members brought her.“She prefers meat, no doubt due to the baby.”“She likes anything citrus aside from peaches.”‘She still isn't sleeping well.’I knew that her nightmares still persisted. Every night the tug of restlessness that woke me up told me so. I stayed at the locked door, wondering if it would be acceptable to break it