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Chapter 32
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Seasmoke Friends Chapter 33
Present-Summer"I still say you should have Ian here with you for this, not me." Rick shoved his hands into his pockets. I gave him a baleful look. "You're the accountant.""He's the business owner, and you're avoiding him."Yeah, well, couldn't deny that one. I couldn't shake all the doubts in my head. We had such a good thing going. I'd cook dinner at his place, we'd have eyes-rolling-back-in-my-head, I-can't-move sex afterward. We laughed. We talked. We acted like a normal couple. But the past couple days, I'd made excuses about needing to paint in order to avoid him. The painting part was true, not that I'd gotten any work done. I just...I just couldn't lose him. And I somehow knew I would. The kind of happy he made me never lasted.I was trying, though. So hard, I was trying. For him. Ian had been right in what he'd said at Seasmoke. I couldn't trust myself to be happy. And the only time in my life I could remember ever being that way was with him. Our childhood, our teen
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 34
SummerI hung my dress for tomorrow night inside the closet door. Dee, awesome friend that she was, had found me the perfect ensemble. Turning my head, I smiled in admiration at my latest painting. This one would not go on sale tomorrow, and was worth every moment of sleeplessness to complete. I had barely resisted the urge to run over to Dee's place the moment I'd finished. Tomorrow night, I'd give it to Rick and Dee when we had a quiet moment.The chimes in my window tinkled. A fresh breeze blew in, smelling faintly of wildflowers and rain. I needed air and to wind down, so I picked up my glass of sweet tea and headed downstairs. Sitting on my front porch steps, I breathed in humid summer air and closed my eyes. The crickets had died down and fireflies blinked in the distance. The creek behind the house ran steady over the crinkle of leaves whirring in the breeze. Stars twinkled overhead, too many for counting. Perfection.My cell phone chirped in my pocket. I pulled it out and
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 35
IanI watched from my seat as Summer walked up to the podium in the Charlotte Art Museum, fidgeting with her dress. What a dress it was, too. Long, deep burgundy, and a slip-satin that hugged her hips and waist. The neckline swept low, peeking at the swell of her breasts. The tone complimented her skin, especially when she blushed, and it was really damn difficult watching her move in that thing when all I could think about was getting it off her.She placed a hand to her hair, which was in some complicated twist concoction, and tapped the microphone. "Can I have your attention, please?" Yeah, she had my attention, all right. A new fantasy ran amuck through my dirty mind. One in which I took out those pins in her hair, one by one, until the strands fell over her shoulders so my hands could roam through them. Then I'd fist that dress and shove the material up past her hips and-Hell. I was flanked between my parents, Rick and Dee, in a room full of people. I folded my arms over my
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 36
SummerI drummed my fingers on the steering wheel as I made the last turn for home. It had been a struggle to focus on the drive so I didn't kill myself in a violent wreck before I was able to confront Sharon.Again. When someone had tapped my arm as I was leaving the benefit and Sharon stood there, that last hold I had on sanity pulled away like a rug under my feet. Just like the first time Sharon had shown up, it had taken me a moment to realize who I was looking at. She'd made the effort to come and I felt trapped. Not wanting to cause a scene, I'd told her to follow me back to the house.Headlights in my rearview mirror informed me Sharon had stayed close. I pulled into the drive, exited the car, and walked to the front door. I didn't say a word when Sharon silently followed me into the house. Making my way through the living room to the kitchen, I flipped the lights on and set a kettle to boil. Unsure what to do, my head was a mess, I turned away from the stove to my mother
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 37
SummerIf someone had told me three months ago my long-lost mother would be coming back to see me, that it had been Daddy's choice to keep her away, that Ian Memmer was in love with me, that Matt Holcomb would ask me to marry him, and that I'd be opening my own studio, I would've committed them to the loony bin, complete with a straight jacket, padded walls, and crafts on Sundays. But, there it was. That's exactly what had happened. And my head reeled.Leaning back on my elbows, I breathed in the early dawn from my porch steps and listened to the crickets fade into the morning. Cicadas buzzed. Leaves rustled with a caressing breeze. I hadn't slept a wink. Not. One. Wink.Ian and I had it out after I'd gone upstairs last night. He'd been sick with worry and I'd reassured him. We'd had angry sex, and then made love. We'd talked into the hours about what I planned to do about Sharon. He'd been unusually mum on the subject. Awhile ago, I'd left him sleeping in my bed in order to wai
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 38
SummerWithin moments of Ian leaving, my cell rang. If I hadn't been so shocked, I probably would've ignored it. But at that point, I was still numb, staring at the door, shaking uncontrollably. "Summer, it's Elizabeth." The elementary school principal. Why was she calling on a Sunday? In summer? "I'm sorry to report Jon Melbourne died late last night."I stared at the kitchen doorway, at the pictures my students had made for me posted on the fridge. Jon's was right on top. A cute scene of us holding hands in the grass. In the picture, he'd given himself back the hair chemo had stolen. It took me three attempts to find my voice and thank Elizabeth for calling. My phone fell from my limp fingers.Everything seemed to wash through me in that moment. Every single thing. Daddy. My mother. Jon and all my other students. Ian. It all erupted from that cavern where I shoved things, stored them away to compartmentalize. Tears brimmed my eyes until the room swam in splotches of color and
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 39
SummerI'd taken Mom to my studio to show her around and it dawned on me how much time we'd already wasted. Over lunch, she had tentatively asked how I felt about her moving back to Wylie. The next day, she'd flown to Houston to make arrangements to put her condo up for sale. I'd spent the next two days idly, painting or cleaning or anything else to get my mind off of Ian.At the cemetery, I breathed humid air and watched Jon Melbourne's tiny casket as it was lowered into the ground. There wasn't a sadder sight on earth than a coffin that size. I stood alone, behind the family as they mourned a child taken too young. A child who would never have a first kiss or fall in love. Who would never go to college or grow up and become a man. How many years had I wasted being scared? How many years had I not lived? Loved? Ian hadn't returned any of my phone calls. I'd tried to go over there to tell him about my mother and everything else, wanting to show I wasn't afraid to talk to him and,
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 40
IanDee came back into the room, her eyes suspiciously wet, phone clutched in her hand. She sat next to me on the couch in their living room and deflated."What's wrong?"She waved her hand. "Nothing. Pregnancy hormones."I didn't believe her, but I kept silent.My knee bouncing, I stared at the front door, willing Rick to walk through. The three of us had decided it was best for Rick to attend Jon Melbourne's funeral. In my effort to keep my distance, to let her stand on her own, I'd had to hear through the grapevine that Summer's student had passed away. And about her mother moving back to Wylie. It had taken everything in me not to race to her side and verify with my own two eyes she was all right. Strangely, the need wasn't out of a sense to protect her, to unload her burden for her, but because I just wanted to be there for her. Next to her. For support, not as a knight. A hard habit to kick, but I'd done it. I guessed that meant the week we'd been apart had done more than kill m
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Seasmoke Friends Chapter 76
JennyHe shrugged as if it were no big deal. His expression sobered as he cupped my cheek. "We need to talk. I've got a thousand things to say.""I've got some things to share, too."Nodding, he glanced around and set me on my feet. Then he bent and hauled me over his shoulder fireman style. I squeaked as he carried me toward the back rooms. We passed the bar and I looked up, blowing hair out of my face. "Rock, close the bar tonight, would you?"Wiping a glass with a white towel, he winked. "You got it."Matt fished around in my pocket for the keys, unlocked the private door to my apartment, and kicked the door shut behind us. With a quick reset of the lock, he climbed the stairs, me still over his shoulder."I can walk."He skimmed a hand over my thigh. "I'm not letting you go for so much as a second tonight." Plopping into a recliner, he adjusted me until I straddled his lap. He cupped my cheeks, thumbs stroking my jaw. His gaze was haggard and apologetic and fraught. "I mis
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 75
Jenny"Has he called?" Facing me, Rock crossed his arms and leaned against the back counter.Perched on the bar top, I swung my legs in nervous energy. "No." Nearly an entire week, and not one call, text, or so much as a smoke signal from Matt. Even when he'd lived in Greensboro we'd never gone this long without talking."He will."I shook my head. "I'm not so sure." Rubbing my forehead, I dropped my gaze and forced my stomach to stop rolling in dread. "I'm an idiot cliché. Girl professes her love. Guy runs for the hills."Rock's brows pinged in awareness as if he knew something I didn't. In fact, he'd been acting strange all damn day. "As a guy, I'm telling you, he'll come around. You didn't see the way he looked at you when you sang. Or how when you walk into a room, his only focus is you. He's so in love with you he doesn't know up from down."Too gutted to even hope, I glanced around the empty tavern. Rock and I had talked all afternoon about the details for Winter's Den. Mat
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 74
Matt"That's how I got your number. I don't know why she had that, or what it means."Memory shifted in my mind. Why we'd argued. The things we'd shouted at one another. The way I'd pleaded with her.We can go on a date, eat out at a restaurant. Hell, I don't know. We could spend a lazy afternoon collecting seashells.The breath seeped from my lungs. Damn. Damn, damn, damn.After I'd left her under the pier that night, she'd done just that. She'd...collected shells. Christ. It had been an olive branch, and she'd died before I could ever have the opportunity to reach for it. Or she'd known she was going to die and left me this as a message. Either way, the whole situation sucked. Down to the nitty-gritty kind of suck.I cleared my strangled throat. "It was something normal, one of the things I'd urged her to do. Collect shells." I tore my gaze from the bag to him. "That's why she had this."His brows furrowed, understanding in his eyes. "You should keep it, then." His finger tapp
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 73
MattI stood there in the middle of my living room, gutted, long after Jenny had shut the door behind her. Hands in my hair, I glanced around, seeing nothing but the fractured look in her eyes before she'd left. Maybe I was ten kinds of a fool, but the thought of her loving me had never occurred to me. I mean, yes, we'd loved each other for years. Probably since the first second we'd met that hot day on the beach. We'd connected in one of those rare fate-like moments people rarely experienced. We'd been friends and a crutch and support for a decade plus. But love? The kind it was apparent she felt...I hadn't a clue.And she'd been right. I'd allowed fear of...who knew what to keep her in this box, stupidly not realizing it was feeding into her ingrained insecurity of not being worthy. Christ. I was the one not good enough. I was the one who couldn't get a handle on what was wrong, not her. From the get-go, Jenny had an innate ability to read me, to get inside my head and fix things
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 72
JennyThe others joined us, and Matt's gaze slid right past me. We chatted about Dee's pregnancy and Summer's engagement party, the holidays, work."I can't get over how different the house looks." Summer shoulder-bumped me. "Matt said you did all the decorating. You have no idea how many times I visited his place in Greensboro and wanted to go Jackson Pollock all over. All that gray and white he had going." She shuddered. "This is really beautiful, and more like him.""Thank you." I chanced a peek at him, but he was studying his glass. "To think, all it took was a roll of duct tape to restrain him and voila."Well, that got a laugh.Amber and Rock showed up shortly after, and I went into the kitchen with the pretense of offering them food. Amber took a plate into the living room where everyone gathered as Rock hung back with me.He surveyed the scene, then me. "So, that's them. The infamous Seasmoke crew.""Yep. Pretty gorgeous, aren't they?" The day was weighing on me and I le
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 71
JennyI headed to Matt's an hour before his guests were to arrive for his housewarming party. I timed it that way so there would be little chance for us to be alone. Wearing a pair of black leggings, knee-high brown boots, and a white fitted sweater, I donned my coat and checked my makeup in the hall mirror. Subtle, but I'd had to add concealer under my eyes to hide the shadows and blush to my cheeks to give some color. I left my hair down. Matt liked it that way. A girl needed advantages.God, I was nervous as hell. Which made no sense. I'd known these people more than half my life. But Matt and I were a couple now. They didn't know that, though, and the stupid, silly part of me wanted him to tell them tonight. We'd been together a couple weeks. Surely, he'd want us to come out while everyone was in one place.Last night, after I'd sung and we got back to his place, we'd had sex. No talk, just sex. And though things had aligned like always and it had been great, the act lacked our
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 70
MattShe moaned. Kissed my mouth in a sweet, sorrowful brush. "I'll see you Friday at the bar?"I had to clear my throat to speak. "Yeah. Wouldn't miss it.""Laters, handsome."Watching her go left an empty ache inside me. And that ache didn't abate until I strolled into Winter's Den two nights later and saw her grinning at customers. What in the hell was this? These errant feelings swirling. The insane need to be near her all the time. Wanting her with every ragged breath between our time together. It was as if oxygen didn't exist if she was out of reach, out of sight.Pulling up a stool, I chatted with her grandfather's friends and Rock until she could break free to say hello. As she leaned over the bar, I caught her scent and closed my eyes to hold it to me. Drifting forward, I went in for a kiss, but she eased back."Are we still a secret?"I studied her expression, her tone, because I'd never heard that chill before. Keeping our relationship from friends and family had be
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 69
MattThe woman was killing me. Killing. Me. Dead.If it wasn't the strike-me-now bartender/musician side of her personality taking up all available retail space in my head, her sweater-wearing, endearing, generous side managed to complete the task. One minute she was my best friend, making me laugh until I required a respirator, the next she was taking me inside her body with reckless abandon and...making me require a respirator. For all intents and purposes, we were a normal couple. We shared meals, snuggled after mind-blowing sex, talked all the time. But none of this felt normal to me. I don't know if that was because it was Jenny or if the blame lay on the fact I hadn't truly had anything close to a real relationship before. There had been lovers, girlfriends, potentials, yet nothing in this kind of realm. Not like the balance Jenny and I had.And something was bothering her. She sat across my kitchen table from me, picking at her food. Despite her incredibly petite size, she
Seasmoke Friends Chapter 68
JennyI had a toothbrush and shampoo at his house. And not in the guestroom. No, in Matt's bathroom. I also had, on his insistence, a couple changes of clothes and panties in an extra drawer. With the bar closed Sundays and Mondays, we'd agreed I'd sleep over on those nights and keep the Wednesday dinners since I went in late that day. Matt liked the routine of it. I liked being with him any chance I could.Filling a Miller tap order on Tuesday evening, I winced at the woman on stage doing karaoke. These Boots Were Made for Walking would never sound the same again. Alas, I cheered when she finished.Rock came up behind me. "I can't believe you're getting laid and I'm not."Laughing, I passed the frosted mug to the customer and collected change. "Maybe if you weren't so picky." With the orders caught up, I turned to face him. "What do you really think?" I kept my voice low enough to avoid stray ears. We'd briefly talked before opening, but he had been pretty mum on the subject. Mat
