Episode 5

Taylor's POV

I won't stop running. My legs are giving out, but I won't transform. 

All I see is my mate's face, his ember eyes, the way his lips move when he tells me not to run. His words echo in my head. 

My wolf is excited, but I don't understand why. 'Give him a chance,' my wolf says. But chances are what got us here.

Every day, my wolf convinced me to give my father a chance and not say anything. But it never did chang anything. A thousand chances and I'm still like this." 

“He may be kind, Taylor. Not everyone is like-’’

“Like dad?’’ saying that alone, brought tears to my eyes. Finally, I found myself on the riverbank. At least the territory that was close to home would help me unwind all these troubles and have some peace of mind.

“You don't understand this, Hazel. If we let another man into our life, all he's going to do is hurt us just like Father does.’’

“You are not sure about that. I can feel it inside me, Taylor. He is our mate and he wants to protect and cherish us. He can't hurt us, you know…’’

"I don't know anything…!" I spat and quickly sat on the dirty ground, placing my head between my knees, lost in thought about the first time I saw Ryan. He was standing at the school gates, talking to his friend. I knew right away that he was the future Alpha of the Black Knight pack, but no one else seemed to know. Ryan kept his identity hidden, and I made sure to go unnoticed too. I kept my grades above average to avoid drawing attention to myself. But now, everything has changed. I just found out that Ryan is my mate, and I'm so shocked.

"Why didn't we know this before?" I asked.

"I don't know…" came the reply from my wolf.

I'm asking myself the same thing. Why didn't I know that Ryan was my mate four years ago when I saw him? Something must have changed, I think. I can only assume that our souls connected during the full moon season, otherwise, we would have gone our whole lives without ever knowing each other. I'm perfectly fine with that.

Now, I need to come up with a plan to keep Ryan from finding me again. I can change my classes and reorganize my schedule to avoid this and prevent it from repeating itself.

"Just because he's going to be an alpha doesn't mean he'll be like your father." my wolf said.

Finally, the words pierce my heart. My wolf knew me perfectly. And she knows the things we have gone through. For some reason, however, she remains a positive Part of Me. The optimistic side. She will always see the good in everything no matter how bad and horrible it is. No matter its appearance. I find this a weakness. Because with everything that we have gone through, She should be more vigilant and skeptical.

 “He doesn't have to be like Father, he could be worse.’’

“Is that the picture you could paint about him? You are judging him already. You are judging our sorry mate without giving him a chance.’’

The words of my wolf echo inside my head. I know that she is hurt. I know that she is desperate for his touch and his love. but I cannot shake the feeling that he is going to abandon us and hurt her just like my father did to my mother.

Silence falls between us again. I let my mind replace the image that we had of him with that of a monster. At Least I would try to not feel anything for him. But the connection was still going to remain. I still wanted him to embrace me. I still yearned for his touch. I still want him to kiss me. To hug me. To make me feel loved and cared for.

“It's not about judgment, I have to take care of us. I have to protect us. even if it means being away from him.’’

There was an unsettling feeling at the bottom of my stomach. my world isn't this made by my words. I know that the mate bond affects mainly my beastly side. But if I let Ryan come close to us, he’s going to hurt us.

I am afraid of vulnerability. He made me weak in his presence. He made me feel defenseless. Exactly how weak my father makes me feel. I'm not going to let another man have the liberty of taking over my life like that ever again, reminding me that I can't defend myself. I will not give another man the power to break me apart, to shatter my heart into several pieces and leave it at the doorstep.

My father has done enough. He has caused enough damage and yet it won't stop. How can I allow myself to bring in yet another man that would only amplify the torture for me? Ryan is meant to be the alpha of the biggest pack in all of the east, that means he's going to be so powerful. Powerful people can do whatever they want. Even if that means anything fun at the expense of their mate's life. 

I will not allow myself to be the subject of such torture and animosity. Not in the hands of the man who's supposed to take care of me and protect me. Obviously, the moon goddess made a mistake. But I was going to rectify it. I was going to stay away from him.