CHAPTER TWO: EVERYTHING IS FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR

Rhea heaved a huge sigh of relief and sagged against the closed door as Adam left without using any of his usual charm on her. It was starting to get on her nerves that every time he was around she felt so uncomfortable that she could barely say a decent word to him. And she was also fed up of his supposedly undying love for her.

It was not that she did not like him. She did. In a big way. But had never thought of him as anything except her elder brother. Just like Zach Cooper. She had grown up as Ashton’s Cooper’s daughter and was closest to Zoey. But had been brought up with Adam and Zach, the one she considered her brothers. The only family she had after her own father Slade Palmer had disowned her like she was dirt.

And when Adam had so openly told her that he wanted her, she had felt insulted. It had been something beyond her imagination and her already poor opinion of the male species had not helped. She had been so shocked by his vehement declaration on her birthday party that she had not known what to make of it.

Had it been a spur of a moment thing? Finally, when she got no news from him for almost a week, she had tagged Adam as one of the philanderers who would stop at nothing to get a woman just to satisfy his whim.

And then bang! Everything they had worked for in their relationship had broken. Her trust in him. Her love for him. Her respect for him. And even when days later, he had phoned to apologize it had been too late. Rhea Palmer had already constructed a barrier around her heart which had helped her survive the loss of her best friend.

And that barrier had been as rock solid as ever. She could still remember last year when Adam had visited her in her apartment for another ardent proclamation of love for her birthday. She had had enough! It had spoilt her birthday and two days later she had fled to New York for some peaceful moments. Thankfully, Zoey had followed her and she had not been alone in her new venture.

Adam Crighton had been the last person on her mind since she had been busy working as internship in the modelling agency of Adam’s late grandmother Anastasia Forrester after just completing her degree.

It had been a pleasurable experience and even if apprehensive to be back, she wanted to be home for her birthday to celebrate with the ‘gang’. How she wished Adam would forget his so-called love for her and become who he had been once again. Life was so less complicated then.

She jumped guiltily as she saw Zoey watching her closely and she quickly straightened her body which was still against the closed door. It was relief which had her legs so jelly like, nothing to do with seeing Adam after almost a year.

“Hey!” she cried to Zoey masking her real turmoil which was raging inside her. She had no reason why her heart was beating so loudly against her chest and her hands were moist with sweat. “Is that breakfast I smell?” she asked glad that her voice sounded normal.

She was ravenous especially after having jogged before coming back to Adam’s house. When Zoey had asked her to drop by Adam’s house, she had been unwilling remembering the ardent declarations of the past year. That was why she had headed straight next door to her home only to be confronted with her father.

“What are you doing here?” she had cried shrilly at the unexpected figure watching her. The latter had frowned dismissing her presence like she did not even existed and she had phoned Uncle Ashton. It was what she had been expecting. Slade Palmer had not uttered a word to her for a very very long time and she had no inkling whatsoever to talk to him. Uncle Ash told her that her father was back in town for a while and was using her house; the one which Uncle Jake had gifted her for her eighteenth birthday.

Since she no longer had the capacity to argue with her father and they could never co-exist, she had no choice than to head for Adam’s house in the early morning. But not before packing a few essential things she might need for the road. Thankfully, they lived a few blocks away and she could go back to her own house anytime.

The toughest part was that she had just to make sure that not to encounter her father during her visits. It was going to end up ugly and she was drained of her parent fighting energy, if ever something like that even existed!

Sometimes she wished she could be as bad daughter to him as he was a bad father. But she was made of another kind of stuff it seemed. Even if he was a vile person, she still considered him as her father. It still hurt; the way he shunned her but she was used to it now. She did not expect anything from him since she had the Cooper and the Crighton family.

“Yes. Want some?” Zoey asked her breaking into her thoughts.

“Sure,” she replied grinning and walking to the kitchen. “Have you met Zach?” she asked her friend who shook her head in answer.

“No not yet. Adam had called him over this afternoon. You know how he is. Working and working,” Zoey told her rolling her eyes in a majestic way.

Zach Cooper was indeed a workaholic. He did not even have a proper house and used Adam’s house as his sanctuary the few days he decided to get back home for some sleep. Zoey had tried to talk some sense into him but her brother was as obstinate as their father. For him each project was a challenge and he never got tired of undertaking every one of them.

Unlike Adam. He was one to take things lightly. Everything. Too lightly even. And that was why Rhea had difficulty in believing that his so called proclamation of love was true. Adam Crighton was one of a kind.

Once, he had convinced his father that he wanted a Mercedes but just after the sale, he had decided that it was not good enough. He was that fickle and Rhea was sure that his love for her would also fade with time. And besides, if her own father was unable to love her, she doubted that someone else could.

“That’s good. I wanted to invite him for my birthday party too. We’d better start calling some friends for tonight,” she suggested but was unprepared for the next question.

“So what’s with you and Adam?” asked Zoey suddenly out of the blue which made Rhea jump and spill her tea.

Where the hell had that question come from? She and Zoey had never talked about Adam except for the time when he had told her that he wanted her. And at that time, Zoey had told her to ignore him and that Adam must have been drunk or something. After that, they had never mentioned the topic again.

So, Rhea had never told her best friend that Adam Crighton had been calling her every morning to profess his undying love for her. But Zoey had been present in the flight yesterday and when Adam had called it had been difficult to avoid her. She had dismissed the call ten times before finally listening to what he had to say with clenched jaws. But Zoey had found out that it was Adam and had put two and two together.

Hell, she did not know what to make of it and asking for someone else’s opinion would only complicate things further. That was why she had decided not to share that fact with anyone and to dismiss the situation as a passing thing.

Which she had succeeded. Until yesterday. Whenever Adam had called when she had been in New York, she had taken the call far from the ears of Zoey; in the bathroom or toilet. When Adam had called her in the plane it had been difficult for her to move away as her friend had already seen the caller’s identity. And had heard everything by the look of it. She sighed. It was going to be a long discussion, she could feel it.

“There’s nothing between me and Adam,” she replied blandly deliberately being dupe because she knew Zoey would get easily bored.

As assumed, the latter blew a deep breath to express her impatience before watching her with hooded eyes. “Don’t be so dumb girl. I mean I knew what happened two years ago but you have never mentioned that Adam was still calling you.”

“I didn’t because there was nothing to tell. I mean come on! You know Adam as much as I know him. He changes his mind every second,” she scoffed dismissing the concern.

At that Zoey lifted her eyebrows mockingly in her direction. “Two years is not even comparable to one second Rhea. Why don’t you tell me what the real problem is?” her friend asked and Rhea was at a loss for words. Did Zoey believe in Adam’s declaration of love now? What happened to the best friend who had backed her up when he had propositioned to her?

“I can’t believe you’re saying that!” she stomped exasperatedly like a small child but was beyond caring. “You’re supposed to be on my side!”

“I am on your side honey. Except I want to understand. For me it’s quite clear if a guy is still after you for two years without having even dated you, then he must be damned serious about you” Zoey said in a derisive voice still looking at her with her lifted eyebrows.

“B…But what about the fact that I don’t love him back?” she retaliated stuttering in spite of herself. It happened every time she was over emotional and sometimes had to calm herself down to be able to talk.

“Have you told him?”

“Told him that I d…don’t love him?” queried Rhea puzzled.

“Yes dumbo!”

“Errm no I never even had the chance. But wouldn’t you think it obvious by the way I’m acting? I mean if I loved him back, aren’t I supposed to appear more willing than I am actually?” she asked clearly surprised that her friend would ask her such irrelevant questions.

“Oh, I don’t know. Love is not always rational,” said Zoey enigmatically and when Rhea looked at her friend with a frown, she continued. “Who knows? Maybe he loves you so much that he is still hoping that you might change your mind.”

“Oh there you go again!” muttered Rhea crossly. “How many times do I have to tell you that Adam is not serious about me?”

“It wouldn’t be apt for me to comment on his feelings. I mean it wouldn’t be appropriate for me to judge his feelings because I really don’t know how he feels. But personally I think he must be pretty serious if he’s still after you.”

“Precisely! It’s not love. It’s an infatuation. Or worst his obstinacy!” she cried frustrated that her friend was not seeing eye to eye with her theory. That had been the main reason she had been reluctant to talk about the whole thing in the first place. She just knew everybody would be in favour of Adam and that would leave her alone which was her worst fear.

“Okay, let’s draw a line on that. What he feels is not important here. Let’s focus on what you feel,” her friend said wisely seeing her frenzied state.

“Right. And I don’t love him,” Rhea repeated stubbornly.

“So you said. Are you sure about those feelings? I mean it’s a “hell no way” or “hell maybe” kinda thing?”

“Hell no way! Zo, come on! It’s Adam we’re talking about, remember?”

“Yeah exactly!”

“But he’s already my best friend. My neighbor. My mentor for so many mundane things. I don’t want to add lover to the list,” she finally confessed in a small voice. It was true. She depended too much on Adam and was not willing to have her life revolve around him at least not more than it already did.

Zoey froze at her words looking at her closely and Rhea felt uncomfortable under her scrutiny. Heaven only knew what conclusion she will end up with this time. But surprisingly she said nothing and seemed to muse on the silence.

“What?” asked Rhea after a long pause feeling irritated that her friend was not voicing out her opinion.

“Nothing. I was just wondering what it would take to just hit you in the head and be evicted without attempt to murder,” her friend scorned and she scowled back.

“Don’t you dare! You have no idea how close we were. It’s been two years since we have not been talking and I miss him like hell. Except I want to be like we were before. Not like we are now, awkward and not even speaking to each other properly.”

“Well, in that case you should change that. Don’t avoid him. If you don’t love him back, don’t give him more footage to come after you. I don’t even understand why you act so weird around him anyway. If you don’t love him, he’s not supposed to affect you so.”

“He doesn’t!” denied Rhea hotly. “I just feel uncomfortable around him, that’s all.”

“Well, that’s my point. If you don’t have any feelings for him, his feelings for you shouldn’t affect you! You’re the one who kicked him out of your life. And you’re losing a sincere friend in the process.”

Zoey was playing the devil’s advocate, she knew. At least Zoey was not forcing her to love Adam back; she guessed she should be grateful for having been spared that. And she was right too in her own thinking. Except that everything gets more complicated in real life.

“I know!” she exclaimed frustrated. “And it is precisely what I have been trying to avoid ever since he had started this whole thing. I so wish I could turn back times and everything would be like it used to be.”

“Oh silly girl! This has never worked for anyone else. So you’d better stop having wishful thoughts and do something. Either you accept him or you tell him clearly that you don’t love him and you want to be his friend.”

“But I don’t want to hurt him!” cried Rhea at the mere idea of confronting Adam. He made her nervous and she knew it was because she was aware of him. That was why she preferred avoiding him whenever possible. And she did not know how to handle the sultry looks he keeps sending her way which made her stomach churn. Out of discomfort.

Zoey threw her a murderous look. “You can’t eat your cake and have it too, baby. This is unfortunately the toughest rule of life.”

“Damn! I must be out of my mind!” Rhea said sagging on the sofa again when they reached the living room after breakfast. Her head was pounding and there was no point in this discussion. They were not even able to conclude about Adam’s true feelings.

“Exactly. I don’t even know why you’re telling him no. He’s handsome, rich and more important head over heels in love with you. What do you need more?”

There it came! Rhea was unable to suppress the anger which burned her at the words from her so-called friend. Wasn’t she supposed to understand that love could not be provided on demand? And Rhea was certain that she did not love Adam Crighton back, at least not in the way he was expecting her to.

“Well, I need to love him too!” shouted Rhea now practically seeing red.

“Right, I agree with you on that part,” Zoey quickly assured her. “But I’ve never seen you serious with any guy. I couldn’t help wondering what kind of guy you’re actually waiting for,” she said in a slightly mocking tone which made her flinch in spite of herself.

How could she confess to Zoey that love would be wasted on her? She was not one who believed in love or commitment or forever and ever. Her parents had hurt her so much that she was not even willing to invest in another relationship which would be futile and would only end up hurting her. She was a lost case and could never be cured.

But Zoey Cooper had been surrounded by strong family bonds all her life and she would never understand her predicament. For Zoey, life was a gift whilst for her it was a struggle. Life was like that. Good to some and the worst to others. Unfortunately, no one had ever said that life should be fair.

It was not that she was jealous of her friend. On the contrary, thanks to her she had been able to know what a family truly was. Zoey had shared her family with her and treated her like her little sister always protecting her from the snide remarks in school. But the wound had been inflicted since a very tender age and would always be part of her.

“So, why don’t you tell him? Tell him that you don’t love him. No matter how much his heart breaks, you need to tell him that you have no feelings for him whatsoever. And that you wish to remain his friend forever.”

It sounded pretty final to her and Rhea felt a pinch in her heart at the thought. She knew her refusal would break Adam’s heart and he would no longer be the jovial character she had always associated him with. That was the main reason why she had been stalling the confrontation between her and Adam. But Zoey was right.

It was time to face the music. She was starting to get so fed up with Adam’s attitude that it was starting to affect her social life. Not that she had an extremely busy one but still she wanted her peace of mind. And her best friend back.

And besides she knew Adam well enough. There was no possible way that Adam loved her in the way Zoey believed. Zoey was a romantic at heart despite her tough exterior. Rhea knew she only dated so many guys because she had been hurt in the past. Badly hurt. And she wanted a way to relieve her grief. Not that Rhea blamed her.

Throwing thoughts of Adam out of her mind, she changed the subject and concentrated on her birthday bash. She was throwing a party tonight and she was thinking of inviting Adam over but before that she had to talk to him. She had to tell him what she really felt for him and what she wanted from him.

Ultimately, she decided that if she wanted her original relationship with Adam, she had to stop behaving like an awkward teenager in front of him.

“I think you’re right,” she finally told Zoey out of the blue. “I need to tell him that I don’t love him and I’m going to find him in the office.”

“No wait! Aren’t you meeting him for your birthday party tonight? Maybe you could find a private place to tell him then. And besides I will be there for him if he needs a friend,” Zoey said her voice trembling and Rhea knew she was worrying about Adam.

And she got nervous again. It was going to be a tough ride tonight but she toughened her resolve; she had to face him like a grown up woman now. She was twenty three for Heaven’s sake and she could take her own decisions.

Everything was fair in love and war. And this was love for Adam and war for her!

It would be tough for Adam in the beginning but he would get used to her refusal in the end. She had to tell him clearly that she was tired of his attitude and wanted him back like the best friend he had always been to her. She had to tell him gently that she cared but not in the way he wanted. And that would be the end of it.