Chapter 8: QUINN

We've had to protect women before but under very different circumstances. There's a big difference between shielding girls and women in a school in Kabul that was under threat of being bombed because some asshole didn't think women should learn shit, and having that shit happening in your own backyard, with women that are now family.

The situation still gives me pause, but I can't say that I would wish for things to be different at this stage. I can't imagine them not being here, part of the fabric of our lives.

My brothers are happy and after the shit we'd seen together in the field, I can honestly say, they deserve every bit of that happiness. I'll do whatever it takes to see that nothing and no one fucks with it and them.

It hadn't been easy at first, had taken some getting used to for the rest of us each time another one fell. It had been just us guys for so long that suddenly having the care of females was going to take some reorganizing on our part.

Females take up a lot of fucking space, both physically and mentally. Men of honor know that shit and have to deal accordingly.

Though we'd built our homes to accommodate family, I don't think any of us ever really expected things to happen this quick after we settled down here. Now we're down to just Devon and I being the last holdouts.

I'm not sure how to feel about this shit, other than it makes me nervous as fuck. From what I see none of the others had been looking for love and happily ever after. But the shit sure did seem to find them out of nowhere, and that's the shit that was making me antsy.

Personally, I never thought there were any women out there suitable enough, in the sense that any woman taking on any one of us would have to have a strong constitution and be just as tough. She'd also have to put up with six nosy over bearing brothers who'd protect her with their lives.

Not the one of us is easy and our standards are high. But, as with everything else in life, my brothers have chosen wisely and my new sisters fit right in with us. It's getting so I don't remember what our lives were like before they became a part of us.

The whole dynamic has changed and as if by silent agreement, we've all adjusted our ways to make things run smoothly. If I have to jump in every once in a while to bring peace between one or the other of the couples that's fine. Even their fights are funny as shit.

It's good to see what I'd be up against if I ever did take the plunge, though I'm convinced I'd have more sense than the rest of them. For fuck sake you'd think they were the first men to fall in love.

I've never seen grown men, men I knew were hard as they come, cave, whine, moan and groan like this lot. And now with the baby here and the pregnancies that seem like the status quo around here these days, they're just pitiful.

As happy as I am for them, I don't see myself walking down that same path though. Sure I get lonely sometimes, and watching the way my brothers are with their women might give me the wants once in a while. But that shit's not for everyone.

I'm more than happy to be the big brother and the proud uncle to the many nieces and nephews I foresee in my future. I'll just stand watch over them and make sure their lives go untouched by the world's assholery.

***

It seems almost as soon as I'd left the water my senses reignited and I knew this shit wasn't going away anytime soon. I decided to get a head start on wrapping up the equipment we were taking along with us as an excuse to avoid the others once they were up and about.

They'll be up soon and I wasn't looking forward to breakfast where we all gathered around together and everyone got into everyone else's shit.

The last thing I needed was one of them or their women looking too hard at me.

By the time they were up and about I still had no answers for what the fuck was nagging at me so I kept that shit to myself and did my best to appear like all was fine in my world.

If I knew what the fuck it would've made a difference but since I was still in the dark I saw no point in making them worry as well. The last thing they needed was my shit to deal with on top of everything else they had on their plates.

I avoided the questioning looks as we went about the business of packing up, but that feeling gnawed at my gut all day without letup

***

Okay, I've had enough of this shit. I've been out of sorts all day, still not able to shake that feeling of gloom.

All morning and into the afternoon I've racked my brain trying to figure out what it could be, if maybe there was something we were overlooking. But after going over and over our preparations there was nothing out of order.

It didn't feel as if it was directly associated with the shit we were dealing with no. Somehow it seemed more personally directed at me, and not one of my brothers, but that was the only thing I was certain of.

I still couldn't quite put my finger on what it is that has been plaguing me since I rolled out of bed. I've steered clear of the others as much as I could since waking up this morning, especially Lo, or at least I tried to.

But my brothers aren't known for keeping their noses out of shit and we're all so in tuned with each other, when one is off someone else always knows. I was definitely off.

I figured it was best to lay low until I knew what the hell was going on, but knew I wouldn't be allowed much time to myself if anyone even suspected that some shit was wrong with me.

If one of my brothers didn't sniff me out, one of my sisters will, sure as shit. So it was easier to just lay low under the pretense of being busy.

I did my part to get us ready to head out, which was another thing that was fucking with my head. I knew it was the best deal for the women and baby Zak, but I wasn't convinced that our place wasn't secure enough. Still, I wasn't willing to take any chances and neither were the others.

Mancini seems cool enough but I'm about looking after my own. Not that I don't trust him. From what we've seen so far he's as straight as they come, but for as long as it's mattered it's been the seven of us taking care of shit.

The trafficking shit had drawn in others that we'd known before, like Law and Creed, and by extension Mancini and a few others had been brought into the fold.

This is the reason why here lately our little family has been steadily expanding, not only to the women my brothers were set to marry, but our friends, old and new, who've also been caught up in this thing one way or another.

For a split second I wondered if perchance my unease had something to do with one of these new acquaintances, but easily brushed it aside.

There was no shaking the feeling that it was all about yours truly. For that reason it was almost easy to push it to the back of my mind as I did the shit I had to do.

There isn't much I fear, if anything, so as long as nothing and no one was fucking with my family, I'm good.

Whoever, whatever this is, I'll deal with it. For now I was only making myself crazy trying to figure the shit out and that was no help to anyone.

Instead I brought my thoughts back to the fuckery that we were ass deep in the middle of. The man at the center of it all is someone I have great respect for even though he's gone. He'd played too big a part in my life, in all our lives, for him to ever not be a part of it, even in death.

I played around with the idea that maybe it was him trying to talk to me from the great beyond, but since my 'gift' had never worked that way before, dismissed the idea. Then again this whole experience was unlike any I'd dealt with in the past so who knows.

Maybe the old man was trying to guide me from the grave. Too bad I don't believe in that shit. It was hard enough accepting this sixth sense I've had since childhood. If I had to deal with some new anomaly now in the middle of all this bullshit I'd lose my fucking mind.

When lunchtime rolled around I made an excuse and continued working while the others went on ahead. I couldn't eat now if you spoon fed me the shit