Chapter 2

"Let me go, Brae; I'm not going with you!" Caesar says, trying to stay anchored in his seat and avoid being dragged by me.

"No, you're going with me," I said quickly, tugging him by the hand and compelling him to get out of his seat and accompany me to the SSG meeting. "Rhea will be there, and it will be an opportunity for you to get to know her personally; this is the first step in getting close to her, so don't pass it up."

"I've already told you that I don't want to!" 

"Stop being stubborn, and just do what I tell you; this is for your own good, okay? Do you want to finish high school without knowing what it's like to be in a relationship, or even just confessing to someone?"

"You sound as if you've already confessed to someone." 

"I haven't confessed to anyone yet, but I've already received numerous confessions, and have been in a relationship once whereas you haven't." 

"I'm still not going with you, so let go of my hand and leave me alone."

"Not even a chance." 

"Brae!"

"Braelyn?" Caesar and I both turned to see who spoke my name, and we were both surprised to see Rhea smiling and standing right in the middle of our classroom door.

My grip on Caesar's hand lessened because of my surprise, and Caesar, who swiftly recovered from his surprise, took advantage of the opportunity to withdraw his hand from me.

"Rhea, what are you doing here?" I asked after a few moments.

Rhea walked into our classroom and approached Caesar and me. "Well, I was hoping to accompany you to the meeting, of course, if that's okay with you," she answered, sounding shy.

I was surprised again, but I didn't show it.

This was the first time Rhea had expressed an interest in accompanying me. We may have been given numerous opportunities to speak, but these are rare and usually happen when we are at the SSG meeting or when it is about the SSG. Aside from that, we don't communicate much or get together because, aside from being in separate classes, we aren't close enough for us to act as buddies to each other. So I'm wondering why she's now acting this way.

"But if you don't want to, that's fine; I'll just go ahead," she replied when I still couldn't say anything. She was going to turn away from me and Caesar, ready to leave our classroom. But I quickly stopped her. "No, it's okay; I'd actually like that, so let's go together," I responded with a faint and fake smile.

After I said it, Rhea turned around with a big smile on her face. "Really?" she asked cheerfully.

I nodded and responded, "Yeah." 

She seemed joyful, which astonished me still again.

Does she really want to walk with me?

Or maybe it wasn't me she wanted to see, be with, or walk with. Because, as soon as I spoke to her, her gaze was drawn to Caesar, who was silently watching us. Until their gazes locked, and Rhea's cheeks reddened. She began fidgeting as she smiled shyly and said, "Hi, Caesar." 

And right then, I felt the same way I did this morning when I noticed Caesar looking at Rhea from a distance. I started getting the feeling that Rhea feels the same way I do about Caesar—that Rhea likes Caesar the same way Caesar likes her.

I felt another pang in my chest. The thought that they both felt the same way and that they had a good chance of being together made me feel as if my heart was being tortured. But, as I did this morning, I kept my emotions hidden. I desperately tried to hide my true feelings, not wanting them to be discovered. 

I acted well despite the fact that I was about to give up because of the pain. I managed to act normal despite the fact that my smile had almost turned into a scowl and tears had almost fallen from my eyes.

'Render your heart, Brae. This is what you want. This is what was supposed to happen. You wanted to play the supporting best friend role and be the bridge of their love in order to hide your feelings, right? So, strengthen your heart, because this is only the beginning. More suffering is on the way, so brace yourself. You've done well at loving him in secret for the past three years, and you'll continue to do well in the days ahead. So it's all fine. You'll soon forget about your love and move on. You'll be okay. Your heart will be fine.' I assured myself in silence, trying to console my aching and breaking heart.

And somehow, my consolation worked out. Because my painful and tight heart has gradually eased, although the pain remains, it has become bearable, allowing me to finally gather my thoughts.

I figured Caesar wouldn't speak up again like he did this morning, so I had to butt in again. But just as I was ready to say anything to take Rhea's attention away from Caesar's snub, Caesar spoke out.

"Hello, Rhea," Caesar said casually, which surprised me.

As I looked at Caesar, I noticed that he had a relaxed expression on his face, with no sign of nervousness or anything else that would reveal his real feelings as he looked at Rhea.

I'm completely taken aback. I thought he wouldn't do or say anything to Rhea because he raced away this morning to avoid being near her, and he was also opposed to accompanying me to the SSG meeting just a few minutes ago. He also stated clearly that he does not want my help in getting close to Rhea, so why is he suddenly acting this way?

Hold on... 

Is it because he prefers to do things his own way that he refuses to accept my help? Is that it?

"Will you be coming with us?" Rhea asked, drawing my attention back to her.

Rhea smiled from ear to ear. She seemed happy as she met Caesar's gaze.

"No, I still have assignments to finish, so I'll just go home first." 

Rhea's eyes were filled with disappointment. "I see," she murmured, to which Caesar replied with a hum before turning to face me.

And, with a nonchalant expression on his face, he said to me, "I'll go home first; do you want me to take your bag?" 

Because I was still dazed, the only word that came out of my mouth was "Ha?"

"You won't need anything during your meeting, right? So I'll take your bag with me so you don't have to carry anything when you get home, and I'll just give it to your mom." 

And because I was still in a trance, my head unable to fathom what was going on, I merely nodded to everything Caesar said, not fully comprehending what was going on.

"Caesar's like a different person when he's talking with you," Rhea observed, causing me to snap out of my trance.

It was also only then that I noticed Caesar was no longer around, leaving only me and Rhea staring at the door of our classroom.

I was so engrossed in my thoughts that I didn't even notice Caesar had left.

Rhea finally glanced at me again, and with a smile on her face, she said, "It looks that his relationship with you is truly special; you seemed to be very important to him." 

A faint smile came on my lips, and my sight was drawn to the door of our classroom, where I gazed longingly as if it were Caesar. "Well, we're best friends; we've known each other since we were children; we're practically like siblings, so our relationship is truly special."

'But not the kind of special friendship I wanted,' I remarked quietly.

"Anyway, shall we go now? We don't want to be late, do we?" I asked, switching the subject.

Rhea nodded before responding with a warm smile. "Of course we should," she says.

We then proceeded to the SSG's office for the meeting.

***

"So, you and Caesar are neighbors?" Rhea questioned as we went down the street to the bus station.

And, just as she had wanted us to go to the meeting together a while ago, this was also the first time she wanted to accompany me to the bus stop, and I already knew why.

She has been talking about Caesar only since the meeting ended and we began walking together.

She has several questions about Caesar. As though she's trying to get to know him better, she asked me questions like what Caesar’s favorite foods are, when his birthday is, and so on. And I'm not that naive to not understand why she was asking those questions.

To be honest, I was irritated by her seemingly never-ending questions. And it's not only because of my personal feelings for Caesar; I find it a little disrespectful that she talks about and asks so many questions about Caesar when I'm the one she's with, not that I want her to ask anything about me. It's as though she's showing how uninterested she is in me.

But, once again, I didn't let it show. As usual, I pretended to be unconcerned, cheerfully answering all of her questions with a smile.

Besides, this is good for the progression of their relationship. Since I've already agreed to be their bridge, I might as well get this over with as quickly as possible. Maybe, just maybe, once they start dating, it will dawn on me that Caesar and I will never be more than friends. Then I'll be able to put my mind to moving on and forgetting my unrequited love for Caesar.

"Braelyn?" It was Rhea's voice calling my name that jolted me out of my reverie.

I took a brief, and slightly astonished, look at her. "Yes?" 

"Are you okay? You seemed lost in your thoughts; is there anything bothering you?" Rhea asked, concerned.

"Nothing, what were you saying?" 

"Oh, I was asking about you and Caesar being neighbors."  

"Oh, yes. We're neighbors." 

"Is that how you guys became best friends?"

"Partially yes. Because, aside from being neighbors, our moms are best friends, and when they were young, they made a promise that they would never separate even if they were already married, and they kept that promise. Because after the both of them got married, they practically forced our fathers to live in the same neighborhood. It was also a huge coincidence that they both got married in the same year and got pregnant with me and Caesar in the same year." I smiled as I remembered my childhood memories with Caesar.

"That's why you know so many things about him and see sides of him that most of us don't." 

I'm not sure if I'm hearing things correctly, but I think I heard a hint of bitterness in Rhea's voice as she spoke those words. She seems a little jealous, which makes me wonder whether it's because I know Caesar so well while she only knows a few things about him, which I don't see as a problem because she'll have plenty of opportunities to learn more about him as they become closer and start dating. While I... I doubt there will be any more opportunities for me to be with Caesar if they become an item. Because once they start dating, I will slowly distance myself from him as a way to strengthen my resolve to move on from him.

I know it won't be easy to distance myself from him and move on. I mean, I've tried it many times before, but I always end up failing. But this time, I'm determined to get rid of this feeling altogether. This time, I'm going to make certain that I finally get rid of these emotions.

My focus was drawn back to Rhea as I heard a loud, deep sigh from her that caught me off guard. I asked her, "Are you all right?"

But instead of answering my question, Rhea simply stared at me with determination in her eyes and blurted out something I never expected to hear: "I'll stop beating around the bush. I'll be honest now, Braelyn," she said after a brief pause. "I like Caesar, Braelyn. And I need your help in conveying my feelings toward him."