Nicole;The car ride home is silent, the tension in the car so thick it could be sliced with a knife. Today's the closest we've ever gotten to discussing our past but yet again, we somehow deftly evaded it. My spine is rigid and stiff against the seat's backrest, my hands lightly clenched on my lap. I stare ahead into the lit night, my face stoic and my mouth hard. I'm anxiously waiting for him to say something…. anything. He doesn't. We pull up into the driveway of my home and I immediately push the door open, stepping out before the engine has even died down. It's blissful to feel the cold night breeze on my face again. I hear the door on the driver's side open too but I pay no attention to him as he climbs out of the car. I march forward towards the door, my body taut with the effort of containing my emotions. I'm fumbling in my purse for my keys with shaky hands when I feel his presence beside me. He must be daft as hell if he thinks I'll invite him inside. I pull the key out of
Nicole; I'm just rounding up for the day when I get a call from Ray. That's unusual. For the whole of the previous week, he attempted to get us on a date multiple times but I'd deftly evaded. This week has been no different. Today's is Thursday and I would have thought he's given up. Apparently not. I hit the receive button. "Ray….hi". "Nicole….. it's been a while hasn't it?". I don't think so. It was just yesterday he was all up my phone trying to take me out. But of course I don't tell him that. "It sure has". I'm not in the mood for small talk and I'm making that as clear as possible. "Are you done for the day?". He asks bluntly. At least I'm glad he's going straight to the point. "Actually, I'm not…..". "Carina says you leave around 8. I'm pretty sure her information is accurate". Carina? What the hell is she doing spilling unnecessary information about me? And to Ray? "Oh….. that's rather….informative of her". "I'll be waiting for you downstairs". I'm just about to come
Nicole;Little dregs of sleep extend their wispy fingers to me and it takes all I have not to give in to them. I push up from my seat and walk over to the coffeemaker, pouring myself a cup aggressively. I do not bother using any creamer or sugar, I need the coffee black and strong to stay awake. Kicking off my heels, I roll my shoulders and pad barefooted to my floor length window, pulling the blinds open to reveal the view below. I've never been able to get over the beauty of the city lights, it's one thing from my childhood that has followed me into adulthood. The city flourishes all around me, bright twinkling lights adorning the dark blanket of the night. It's simply beautiful.It used to be a means of escape. As they had their way with me, I'd shut my eyes tight and imagine I was somewhere else, somewhere up high, flying over the beautiful city. Or perhaps on the beach, the waves crashing against my feet and the wind in my hair. And I made a promise to myself. One day, I'd escape
Nicole;I'm not able to reach Ray until two days later. His phone number finally goes through and his sugary voice flits to me as he picks up the phone."Nicole. What a……"."Where are you?". I ask coldly. There's a slight hesitation on the line before he replies me."Just somewhere. What? Would you like me to come over to your place?". I can hear the silent insinuation in his voice. I glance around at my surroundings. I'm not at my place. In fact, I haven't even slept there for the past three days. I sigh softly and turn back to him on the phone."I'm at work". "Work? It's 9pm. On a Sunday!!!!!"."Are you……" "I'll be there in 15". He says and the line goes dead. I glare at the phone in irritation before dropping it. It's true that I have refused to sleep at my place. On that Friday night two days ago that I had the altercation with Alex, I had attempted to go back. But the sense of unease grew with more time that I spent there, so much that I was forced to grab my car keys again and
Nicole;My heart thrums in my chest heavily. I must look a sight, dressed in a pair of skinny blue jeans and a cable knit sweater, my hair tousled from incessantly running my fingers through it. Coupled with the prominent dark circles under my eyes, I really can't begin to imagine what I look like. "It's true. You are sleeping in the office". Alex doesn't sound surprised or amused, simply…. empty. It takes all of me to look him in the eye."I have a lot of work to do". I hate that my voice comes out smaller than I would have liked."You've been sleeping here for the past three days". Shit….he knew that? He folds his arms across his chest and cocks a suspicious head at me. "What's going on, Nicole?". I feel the heat rush up my face. This is by far one of the most embarrassing situations I've ever been in and it shows."Everything is fine". Even as I say it, I hear my voice come out thick with emotions. Even I don't believe myself. "As I said, I just have a lot to do". He's still peeri
Nicole; I'm horrified to wake up the next morning to see that it's almost 9. With more adrenaline that I thought possible, I jump into the shower, washing my hair and lathering my body at the same time. To my surprise, I don't see any missed calls on my phone when I hastily check it. I would have expected to have it blowing up by now. But is it actually a good thing that no one is calling me? I don't have time to dry my hair so I simply put it up into a tight low ponytail, hoping the wet condition doesn't show. I pull on the first set of pants and shirt I find and throw on a pair of ankle length boots. And while still shuffling my feet into the contraption, I dash out of the house and into my car, dreading each ticking second. By the time I reach the office, I'm hassled. I'm breathing heavily and practically running. My heart thumps in my chest as the elevator heads up. It's a Monday and every Monday morning, we hold a project meeting. I glance at my wristwatch. I'm over 15 minutes l
Nicole; My mind is still in a state of turmoil as the day darkens around me. It's nearly 9pm and I still have no idea if I'll have a chance to sleep over at the office or not. I watch people trickle out of the building from all around me and by the time I finish the last document I'm working on, it's well past 9 and my decision has been made. I'll be going to my home. I gather my things and take another glance at myself in the mirror. It's high time I started facing my fears. It's time to go home. I shuffle out and head downstairs in the elevator. I'm half tempted to walk towards Alex's office and check on him but that would be highly unnecessary. I wouldn't want to feed the potential misconceptions either. I smile politely at the receptionist on my way out and mechanically drive home, my heart all the time in my stomach. There haven't been any surprises recently but I can't lose my guard. I know him. He's simply bidding his time, playing around with me. The thought infuriates me. I
Nicole; I can't control my shivers under the shawl. Jared's arms wrap around my shoulders as he leads me towards the porch, coercing me to sit gently. I watch the back of the two policemen as they lead Greg forward to the van. He's screaming something but I can't hear him above the haze in my head. It's very reassuring to feel some level of human contact. The accompanying police woman walks forward to me and hands me my cell phone. Her lips are moving but I can barely hear her. I don't try to either. Grasping my phone with shaky hands, I bury my head in between my legs as my breath comes out in pants. Jared settles down beside me and his arms draw me in close. I don't know how long we stay there but as my breath slowly becomes steadier, I hear the first police car pull out of my driveway. Almost immediately, I hear the screech of another set of tyres as another car pulls in. Through the haze of my vision, I look up to see a sleek, black Audi pulling in. I see the driver step out of t
My heart thuds loudly in my chest. What the hell have I done? How do I convince a smart, grown man that he heard me wrong. Of all my truths, this was the one thing I wasn't ready to divulge. How did I get so into my feelings and give myself away like that? "Alex…. it's not what you think". I hate the way my voice comes out small. I have always been a bad liar so if my voice doesn't tell already that I'm lying right now, my face must. Either ways, I'm caught. "Nicole, then tell me what it's like". He still manages to exercise good control over his voice. I'm impressed. And I need to learn that at least from him. "Alex….". So fast, our roles have been switched. Suddenly, I'm the one who wants to slide closer and reach for his hand and make sure I'm holding him close to me so he doesn't go away. I resist all urges to do that as I wring my hands in my lap. "Alex….I have something to tell you". I look at him tentatively through my lashes. His face is impassive, just staring at me directl
When I open my eyes the next morning, it takes a little while before my brain processes my surroundings. For the past two weeks or so, I've been in one space, waking up in the same bed, to the same ceiling and to the same warm, reassuring hand wrapped tightly around my torso. Today, things are different. Much different.I roll over on the bed onto the side of my good arm and just….stare out the window emptily. Slowly, my brain does a reboot of everything that lhappened yesterday. This is it. As hard as it was, I finally managed to talk about the weight that's been holding me down, hanging over my head and shoulders. That alone brings a small smile to my face as I register the light feeling in my chest. It sure feels good to offload to someone. It seems like a thousand year's worth of weight has been lifted, I guess talking about all of it was good for me afterall. But now that I have….what now? What next for me? Are things really going to stay the same between Alex and I?My mind flas
Alex pulls the duvet up to my chin, tucking me in fully before coming to settle beside me. As he stares at my face, for some weird reason, I can't stop imagining what he sees. Does he just the red eyed, puffy faced me, or perhaps….is there a layer of disgust over it? Not that I'd blame him one bit. I hold my breath as he brings a hand up to caress my cheek lightly, his gaze burning fiercely into mine. And yet, he doesn't say anything. I suddenly feel the need to break the silence."I ran away when I was 15". I say, my voice hoarse. He sighs softly and just continues to stare straight at me. It's almost as if he's afraid to say something, scared to have the moment crumble away. I'll take that as my cue to continue. "One day when my mum went to work and Ace was in school, I snuck back home from school and took my things. I never looked back ever since that day. But perhaps that was a mistake because he found me in New York". One of Alex's eyebrows go up in surprise but he still doesn't
My heart thuds lightly in my chest as I follow Alex to the bedroom. This is the exact moment I've been avoiding all these days. All along, I knew Alex seemed to be fine with me but he's only human and I know a huge part of him probably still wants to know everything going on. Or rather, that went on. It's been nearly two weeks since the incident and so far, we've both done a good job of acting like something life changing didn't go on. As sick at it is, a part of me actually hoped he'd have forgotten. Like he could. I'm such a fool. I focus on the ripple of muscles on his back as we make out, racking my head actively for what to say, anything at all to lessen the tension."How was it at the hospital?". I ask quietly. What I really mean to ask is how is he? I'm a bit scared of that answer. Because I know I don't want him to be fine."He's….the same". Alex says, his voice neutral. I resist the urge to let out a sigh of relief. He's stitin the coma. Why the hell won't he just….die alread
I seek his lips desperately as we make our way upstairs. We crash through the door blindly and make our way to the bed. Despite the heat of the moment, Alex places me on the bed gently, taking time to ensure that my arm isn't a position that could potentially hurt it."Where did you say that zipper was again?". He asks, mocking resignation in his voice. I chuckle and reach for the little pink hook, sliding it open. Alex gladly takes over, opening it the rest of the way and parting the dress on either sides of my body. I'm well and truly naked in front of him now and I can't wait for feel his skin against mine. He positions between my legs. I firstly think he's going to part me wider and slide into me already but he seems to have other plans. He lowers his head and kisses my face tenderly. He doesn't stop there. He continues to trail the tiniest, more featherlight kisses down my cheek, neck and finally, my chest. I arch upwards, inviting him to take my nipple in his mouth but he has ot
My heart rate quickens as he claims my mouth again. Every single nerve in my body seems to be alert. He brings an arm forward to wrap around my waist, pulling me tightly against his frame, making me feel what I'm doing to him. The bulge in his pants is hard, proud and unflinching. He wants me to feel it, and that's exactly what I do. With my semi-good arm wrapped loosely around his waist, I reach down with my good arm and reach for his zipper fumbling around awkwardly for it. When I finally pull it apart, I feel that front of his briefs staining against the pressure of his cock. It wants free, and I'm here for that. Before I can reach for his waistband, I feel his hand snake under the hem of my short dress and reach upwards. The breath catches in my throat at the delicious sensation and my nails embed crescents into his back as I dig them into him. He takes his time, hiking his fingers up my inner thighs, leaving after him a delicious trail of heat that tingles my core. Subconsciousl
By the time my arms starts to heal, I'm damn well already tired of staying in bed. But Alex is strict about it, not letting me up for longer than necessary. When the bullet wound finally healed enough for me to move my arms, I was more than elated to let him know.I'm just in bed when Tori brings up a lovely bouquet of roses. I groan but inside of me, I'm screaming and melting. Ever since I got shot, Alex has pointedly given me the best of attentions. He brings me flowers every single day and makes sure the words are barely out of my mouth before my wishes are met. Tori has been a lovely help by his side and if anything, I was really glad to see her again at least. On the times Alex had to leave me to be present for work, she kept me good company and this little development got us even closer than ever. It's official, I genuinely like her and she seems to like me too. As she brings the flowers up, the smile on her face is unmatched."Here we go again. This man is going to overload thi
My mind regains consciousness first before my body does. As I come to, I take the deepest breath I can manage and the first thing I notice is the fact that the air smells of….flowers. Lavenders, roses….and something else. I can quite place a finger on it. It…. really can't be, can it? There's no way I made it to heaven. The Lord must have had a lot of mercy on my soul to have put me here. I must say though, the flowers smell way too earthy. I'd think the flowers in heaven would be different. And so slowly, I let my eyes drift open as I prepare to be bewildered.I take in the pearly white ceiling above me first. When it finally seems like I might have enough control over my body to swivel my neck, I turn at small angles to glance at either sides of me. My brows furrow in mild confusion as I take in all of my surroundings. It somehow looks…. familiar. I try to push up on my arms but a pain so sharp shoots up right into my arm's length. I wince loudly and plop back on to the pillow. That
I see his eyes widen as he rushes forward. I'm full on crying now, the tears streaming down my face and obscuring my vision. It feels like a miracle, perhaps this is the one miracle to make up for all the years of misfortune I've gone through. "Nicole!!!". Alex rushes forward and firstly reaches for my hands that are still taped behind me. "Are you okay? Fuck, what the hell is even going on?". His breaths are coming hard and fast as he works on freeing my hands. From the sitting room, I hear Ace's grunts as he probably tries to get on his feet. Alex's blows must have landed well. When I hear his grunts coming closer, I feel a sense of panic settle in my chest again but thankfully, the tape comes undone around my wrists and for a moment, my hands feel too good to be mine. The blood flows right in my arms again and it's the most delicious sensation ever. Ace walks in through the door right in that moment and I see that the lower half of his face and a good fraction of the front of his