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Hundred-Five: A Secret I Took To My Grave.

SUSANNAH.

TWENTY-EIGHT YEARS AGO.

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant.

I wrote in my journal for the first time in a really long time. You see, when I came back with Gerald to his pack, all I had were his promises of a better life but I also had this journal. Sometimes, I think it's the reason I was able to get over what happened with Boy.

Or at least, I'd like to think I was over it but the truth was, I was not.

Sometimes, I even still blamed myself for what happened to him. Perhaps, if I had never left that day. Perhaps, if I was careful enough, maybe he would still be here with us. With me.

And with that blame came an insurmountable amount of grief and self-loath. Gerald was able to move on quickly, I didn't blame him. Boy wasn't his son and regardless of everything, he still had a Pack to rule.

The earth could crumble to the ground but he'd still have to rule the next day. That was a challenge that we had when we moved, one we hadn't really thought about. Being an Alpha came wi
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