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Banished
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2024-10-29 19:42:56"Well, think again, slave girl. Let me remind you, in case you've forgotten." Biting my lip, I unintentionally took a step backward, absorbing his anger. Uncertain about what drove me to speak directly to him, I now realized I was in trouble. He had rained insults on my appearance and status too many times in the past, calling me ugly and attacking me so intensely that I hesitated to face myself in the mirror. I cursed the temporary haze that had overtaken me.
Yet, it felt right, him being my mate. I could swear it was orchestrated by the gods. Realizing I had zoned out, I looked back up at him, apologizing. "I'm sorry, sir," I tried.
"No, you listen to me. Even if you were the last person in this pack, I wouldn't make you my Luna. It's not just about your appearance or how displeasing you are to my sight. You're a mere Omega, a nobody on this pack's ladder. You hold no relevance, and I would merely waste my time on you. Besides, you're weak, lily-livered, spineless. What use could you possibly be to me?"
I felt my hand go to my heart and squeeze in pain, and I fought the tears that threatened to spill out of my eyes. As though he had signaled the end of the festival, the rest of the pack ferreted out and left me alone on the floor.
For what seemed like forever, the pack trickled out of the festival, and I waited for someone, anyone to comfort me. I knew I was not their favorite pack member, and I knew that if they could, they would have me removed, still I hoped that in the face of my heartbreak, someone would feel bad enough to pick up my pieces.
When I realized that no one was coming for me, I wiped away my tears and went to sit down in front of a tree, using the bark as a back rest. What had possessed me so entirely that I went to approach him as my mate? I already knew that he had no regard for me, he had no interest in me, had called me ugly, and frigid so many times. So why did I hope?
As though the universe could not leave me to my pain alone, I heard the murmur of approaching footsteps, so I wiped away my tears quickly, hiding in the bushes. Peeking, I tried to see exactly who was coming back, and then I realized it was Alpha Brad.
He had hurt my feelings so badly, I didn't want to see his face, but I listened in on the conversation, wondering why he would return after everyone had left. He had already rejected me, so surely he was not coming back for me.
I heard him quickly clear his throat and begin to speak, and I remained entirely quiet, so none of them would realize my presence.
“That girl from earlier, what's her name? Well, I do not care. She is one of the most unattractive members of our pack. How did she get in? I do not appreciate her presence, and I find her quite off-putting. I did not want to do this in front of everyone else in the pack, but I would like to send her on exile.”
Slapping a hand against my mouth, I pushed back tears. He wanted to banish me for an offense I couldn't help but commit!
“I do not think she is a right fit for this pack, as all she has done so far is embarrass us very terribly. Especially me. She is losing her mind, since she thinks I am her mate. I say we get rid of her before she becomes a real problem. Find her and ask her to leave, alright? Goodnight men.”
With that, he turned with a flourish and left the grounds with the men trailing after him. I remained very still so my movement would not snap a twig, and sobbed quietly into my palms. So because he did not find me attractive, he was willing to take away the only home I had ever known all my life.
In a way, I could not feel complete remorse for having to leave the pack because they had made me feel filthy, despicable all of my life. I had not spent a single day of my life in the pack without at least one reminder that I was ugly, or unwanted. At least it was honest enough to admit that he didn't find me very appealing, and I could stop worrying about that.
Perhaps it was a good thing that I was being escorted out of the pack. The pack had not given me much, and had always reminded me that I stood out and was not the type of person they wanted there. They had criticized everything I had ever done to the point where I had started to expect it, made me feel so severely uncomfortable in my skin. If I were to leave, I was sure I would have some regrets, but at least, I would be away from their hatred.
I had not a single dime to my own name, but I already knew that I would prefer that to having to remain in the pack where I wasn't wanted. If I went away on my own, I could throw away the idea of there being a hero, a savior, and save myself.
The one time I dared to hope for love, it resulted in pain and an imminent banishment, making it clear there was no hope for me in that realm. My stomach growled, and I sighed. Throughout the festival, I hadn't eaten anything, but now, with people gone, the spread looked like a farewell feast for me.
Aware that I wouldn't be missed, and no one would throw me a party, I acknowledged their lack of fondness for me. The food spread was the best acknowledgment I'd receive in the pack. Without dwelling on it, I picked up a loaf of bread and began my last supper.
A life beyond my pack was something I had never imagined. What awaited me?
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