Chapter 02 "My Problem Starts Now"

My hands were holding that thing, an ancient rusty shaped star-pin. The size was similar to the old one hundred Rupiah. My eyes were glued to the rough sketch, and scratch circled one side, which seemed a written text.

These letters were a little strange but similar to ancient characters. The stroke was too neat and perfect to say just a mere scratch.

At least I recognized it wasn't Javanese or Sundanese ancient characters. Because I had already known those two even though I didn't quite understand it. This character also didn't look like coming from Japan, China, or Korea. This might come from other areas, or maybe from distinct parts of the world. I had no idea either. Since the limited knowledge that I possessed, my head hurt when I thought too much.

"Hoi, why are you silent there, dammit!? Aren't you feel cold? If you want to look for death once more, it's up to you! But don't expect I'll help you again!" Shouted Dimas from a distance.

"Yeah, sorry, wait for me!"

With the rush, I put a star pin into the back pocket of my pants. Then went after the man who had walked the small path to go back to the camp. Not much different as the last time, I had a little trouble crossing the track filled with stones and roots of these trees. But at least I passed it through more quickly. Because I just follow Dimas footsteps, who was in front of me.

Once we arrived at the campsite, the smell of grilled fish meat directly pierced my nostrils. Inviting hunger in the middle of the cold that enveloped my wet body. Near a campfire, Kak Indra put some fish freshly baked onto plastic plates. Then got ready to put more fish on the grill. Kak Shella was the first to be aware of our existence.

"Oh, you're both back? Wait, Dimas! Did you just wash your clothes or take a bath?" She showed a surprised expression while looking at our condition. "Jeez, Anggi! Why are you also soaking wet?"

"It's all because of this fool! He can't swim, but he wanted to play in the riverbed. So I inevitably help him when he has almost swept away before," Dimas replied curtly. It seemed he was still annoyed. That man didn't hesitate when snorted in front of my nose.

"You should have let him drown. Don't bother to save people who really want to looking for death!" Said Kak Indra, who sat beside the campfire.

"I wish the hell. But remembered that he still owes me a hundred thousand Rupiahs. So, I had to save him." Angry Dimas walked directly to our tent that was established a few meters away from the fire.

He was indeed issued sharp words. It would be a blatant lie if I said those words didn't hurt me. But I never took it to my heart. Because I know he didn't mean to say it honestly. I was very familiar with the nature of my close friend. Although he was a bit rough, in fact, he was a very caring person. If not, it was unlikely he was going to save me from sinking earlier. Then scolding me if he didn't feel worried about me. You could say that his bold trait was the shield that covered his soft nature inside.

One more thing, I would pay my debt later.

I followed Dimas toward the tent. Took the dry clothes out of the bag and then changed the wet ones. Of course, I didn't forget to take the mysterious star pin out from my pocket. Then put it inside the pouch of new pants. Indeed I changed behind a large tree near here. Because I felt a little embarrassed when my thin body was seen by others. Unlike Dimas, who casually dressed in front of the tent. As if he really wanted to show off his body to others. Instead, Kak Shella and other female members have averted their eyes because they felt ashamed of themselves.

After changing clothes, we joined other fellow members. Where all Taekwondo members who participated had gathered near the bonfire. A man was helping to bake fish. He was Kak Erik, one of the closest Kak Indra's friends often called "The Java" for his homeland. Also, there were first-year students like me; the twins Vian and Vani. Because their identical, people may often be mistaken for them.

The atmosphere was more lively and fun. Because in the middle of cooking, some people like to tell a joke. The topic could be anything. But most often were the funny club moments in the past. As a new member, of course, it caught my attention. I just found out that Kak Indra ever wore a cheerleader uniform.

That happened when that man challenged his senior when he was a freshman. He lost. As punishment, he was forced to wear a uniform of cheerleader club. Kak Erik, who joined the club from the beginning, showed photos of Kak Indra wearing that shinny "bling-bling" uniform to everyone.

Could you imagine it? When his grim face and muscular body wrapped in a super cute outfit? Suddenly everyone laughed about it. While Kak Indra was in shame, trying to catch up and beat The Java who took his picture.

Because the atmosphere was fun and togetherness of all these people, I could feel the warmth in my heart. A unique thing that was rarely felt. I was very fortunate to be accepted as a part of them. This was what I would make assets to move forward.

About an hour later, the dinner has ended. Some people were assigned to wash tableware, some were given the task for tidy up the collected firewood. As for me, being in the 'not doing anything' and remain in place. Between not needed or just be troublesome, I was placed in this section for those reasons.

Dimas came up after the completion of clearing firewood near the campsite. And then sat on the mat, next to me. Taking a packet of corn chips from Kak Indra's hand and ate it up. Then he offered that snack and was about to hand it to me.

"Nope! I am full."

"Really? Too bad! Though the chips are delicious!" His voice sounded so bright while his mouth was full.

"The chips that you said tasty is mine, bastard!" Kak Indra, who didn't like his food taken out from his hands, seized back what belonged to him.

"You're so stingy, Captain! I just had some!"

Feeling ignored by Kak Indra protest, Dimas snorted boldly in disgust behind Kak Indra's back. That scene made me let out my laughter. I think it was pretty funny when Dimas sulked like that. Pouting like a child to his mother.

"Why are you laughing?" Dimas raised his eyebrow.

"It is nothing. Just forget it," I said, smiled lightly. That boy was silent for a while staring at me. As if there was something funny on my face that caught his attention. He also didn't say anything to me. After a long time, I felt a little uncomfortable about it. "What's wrong? Is there something strange on my face?"

"I've seen you frequently like this, but let me tell you this time."

"Seeing me like this?" I wondered.

"You look like a woman. From the way you speak, your voice, your mind, and your attitude, I felt like I was dealing with a woman every time."

"No way! I am a real man, you know!"

"I'm sure if you dressing up with girl's clothes, there will be a lot of men attracted to you."

"Wh-What the hell are you talking about!!?" I protested loudly.

Loud laughter escaped from his mouth. "Relax! I am just kidding. Seeing you angry like this is very funny. I really couldn't stop laughing. Very amusing!"

Dimas's laughter becomes the center of other's attention. Fortunately, the conversation was just between us. If widespread to other members, I would be very embarrassed. Maybe I would follow the previous action by Kak Indra, chasing and trying to hit the person next to me.

However, if you thought about it well, maybe it was precise words. Sometimes I felt my trait was similar to women.

That was because I grew up and raised by a mother and two elder sisters. Father had left my family for another woman when I was five. Deeply hurt by him, my mother decided not to marry again until today. So I didn't know how it felt to have a father and be raised by a man.

Set aside myself, I always think bad about men. But my views changed after I met Dimas. Not only protected me, who was continuously bullied by others, he was also kind to everyone. One day, a little kitten fell into the river, and he saved it regardless of the heavy stream and rain. I was touched. It was like watching a real hero in real life. Maybe that made me want to be like him.

Since then, I've always followed him wherever he went and tried to follow his behaviour and speaking style. This little heart hoped that if I could be akin to Dimas. But no matter how often I followed him, I could never approach someone who I admired. I have to accept the fact that there was a significant distance between him and me.

Nevertheless, the desire remains unchanged. I wanted both my mental and physical to get stronger. I wanna have great courage and spirit. I also wanted to be useful to others. I didn't deny if I wanted to be some kind of hero, precisely the same as Dimas. Although it took a long time to achieve it, I would keep trying. No matter how much time will be spent.

"H-Hey, stupid!" Suddenly I was startled by Dimas's rising sound. He shook me for the sake of interrupting my dreaming. When I looked at him, a startled expression directed at my lower body. "Look!"

I immediately followed the direction of his fixed gaze. A light was shining brightly from my back pocket pants. Instinctively I stood up as soon as possible. Then remembered if it was where I kept the mysterious star pin after changing clothes. While trying to take it very carefully and slowly, I felt the gaze of all the people who were around. It was weird. Whereas before, I thought no one could see the light of this pin except me.

Dazzling golden yellow light was emitted from the sidelines of my hand grip. The intensity was too high. Dark trees looked like having their own radiance after the star pin's ray doused them. Even the bonfire, which was a primary light source here, was nothing when compared with the star pin. I closed my eyes with the other hand because it was too blinding.

"What is it, Anggi?" Asked Kak Shella, who also blocked her view to not look at it directly.

"I have no idea either. I just picked it up."

All the people fell silent and were stunned by the light that radiated from within my grasp. So did I. Because this thing shined more brightly than when it was the bottom of the river.

"I'm feeling bad from it. I think you should return it to its original place!"

Anxiety appeared on Kak Shella's face, that girl was biting her bottom lip. I looked at the people around me. Although no one was talking, their expressions showed similarities to one vote, including Dimas. That boy nodded to express consent. Maybe from the beginning, I really shouldn't take any stuff randomly just because of high curiosity.

Due to a somewhat chaotic situation, I intended to carry out Kak Shella's idea. I held the star pin tightly, planning to return it to the riverbed. I caught all the light by my hand, although there was still shining through my fingers.

Suddenly, I felt extreme pain. The palm of the hand I used to hold that thing was heating up. I opened my palm reflexly. I flinched when I found that luminous pin began to enter my body slowly. Ignoring the surrounding, my eyes were glued to the scenery that surprised me half to death.

A moment later, it disappeared. Imprint on my palm, then hot steam somehow continually out of me.

"Wh-What's this !!?" I yelled. Unable to withstand the heat that burned my hands, I shouted. Grimacing in pain and crying uncontrollably until falling to the ground. Hot steam kept blowing out of my arms and continued to wrap me.

"Anggi!!"

The first person who approached me was Dimas. He took my hand and tried to douse it with mineral water. But rather than extinguished it, the burning was worsening. Even the heat starting to spread the whole body. Some people tried to flush my body with water, but it was useless. The heat had been burned all over me.

I rolled around on the ground while yelling desperately. My body was like placed on the grill with a fire burning, and that imagery became true. My whole body starting to be baked. Not like a person who just sunbathes on the beach, but more similar to the burning charcoal embers. In some parts, my skin began to crack and peel.

The pain was quickly spread throughout the body and organs inside me. Until I was no longer strong enough to move around and screaming. My whole body was numb. My eyes only could see black color. My ears were no longer able to catch any sound. The smell of the burned meat was the last time I sniffed.

"Why is this happening to me? What have I done to be this way?"