Jules was tired.
He woke up tired and went through all his classes tired. He had called his dad five times last night and then on the fi fth time his dad didn't even bother letting it go to voicemail instead declined the call on the second ring. He was tired to his bones then he looked at Venus. She was sitting opposite him in the cafeteria eating a bag of potato chips with chopsticks while reading some maths textbook.
The sight made him feel light because Venus was the type of girl that ate potato chips with chopsticks and read math textbooks in her leisure time. She caught him staring and gave him a funny look. "You want some chips?" She asked waving the bag at him. When he reached over however she snatched the bag away before he could indulge.
"I-I didn't think you were actually going to accept my offer." She mumbled.
Jules raised his eyebrows. "So you offered expecting me to say, no?"
She nodded sheepishly and Jul
Jules knocked really hard on the wooden door, and the sound resonated in his heart. His hand fell to his side where they stayed bawled up and stiff. He thought about the reason he was knocking on the door of the Beckett house while he waited for the door to open."Come over to my house tomorrow." Venus had looked at him over the book she was holding. It sounded like a weird mixture between a question and a command. Her eyes never left him even when he looked away, he could still feel her stare.Like waves crashing violently upon the cliff.After an incident as a kid when he nearly drowned, Jules has had an unreasonable fear of water. He hated the sea and everything that had to do with it. Nothing reminded him of the sea more than Venus's eyes so why didn't he feel like running away? He hated it but he wouldn't mind drowning in them."Why? You said you liked hanging out at mine because it
Jules didn'tknow what to think.It had been a week and a few days sinceJules and Venushappened—that's exactly what people were calling it— and while Jules expected for a major change in his life as he knew it.The last thing he expected was the masses to be just as aware of the change in his life as he was."What's Venus thinking? Jules, really? I wonder what that freak must have done to get her attached to his hip."Jules the freak, had just exited his English class and was heading for Calculus when the voices stopped his descent down the stairs. Two girls were in front of the water fountain which just happened to be next to the stairs."I know right, I mean it's bad enough that that weirdo Venus is the shiny new thing that everyone's obsessed with. Now she's hanging with Jules?! Did you know she blew me off forhim."Girl number one replied. "She blew you o
Venus fell ungracefully on top of her bed with a sigh and Jules watched her awkwardly by the door as she stared at the ceiling. She looked like a teenager, an angry angst teen and although it shouldn't, it made him want to smile. She motioned him forward without looking at him, he approached her bed slowly.He had only intended to sit at the edge but immediately he made contact with the bed she pulled him down so he fell unceremoniously beside her.He got a strange sense of déjà vu.Her eyes were still trained to the ceiling, Jules turned his head and stared at the side of her face. "Do you enjoy making me fall for you?"Her only reaction was a blink and Jules sighed looking away from her to the ceiling. It was like every other ceiling, there wasn't much to look at but she was still staring—like there were words written only she could see. It made him notice the tiny plethora of fractures that were
Venus traced Jules's lips with her fingers and although they were cold it left a trail of fire against his skin.He thought of nothing, then everything as he held her. He thought of how clouds of gas and dust collapse into itself to form galaxies, he thought of how she was a star that had a person's name. Vee-nuhs. He thought of Venus.When he closed his eyes he could still see her engraved on the back of his eyelids asking the same question she asked the day they met. Are you alive or just existing?He opened his eyes finally ready to answer. "I'm alive."She smiled like she knew what he was talking about but she probably didn't—since it all happened in his goddamn head, after all—or maybe she did, maybe she was lying when she said she couldn't read his mind.He looked at her. Can you hear me, Venus? If you can I just wann
"What do mean you can't come home?! Now you listen here Johnathan you better get your ass back in this house in the next 24 hours!" Marie screamed over the phone.Jules let his head rest on the door with a thump he wasn't really eavesdropping he could already hear Aunt Marie having a screaming match with his father over the phone from his room upstairs, so he decided to come downstairs to feed the pain growing in his chest. He listened to the one-sided conversation outside his father's study."—Johnathan," Marie gasped. "That boy is your son! Why would you ever say that?""—that's no excuse! I can't believe you left him alone for this long! What would Moria say? Do you think my sister would have wanted this?!""—Don't you dare raise your voice at me, Jace! She was my sister first before your wife.""—shut up! Just shut up!" She sobbed. "That boy did not
Venus took him away from the field and they ended up in an indoor swimming pool. She acted like she didn't see the closed sign as slipped through the window at the side of the building that just happened to be cracked open. She opened the front door for him with a Cheshire cat grin."We are trespassing!" Jules hissed even though he had already stepped into the foyer looking around."Do you really think someone will catch us?" She smirked. "Mind reader, remember?""What if another Jules comes along and you can't read him until he find us?"She laughed then, boy did she laugh like he had uttered the craziest thing. Jules never wanted it to stop because just being there, hearing it—made a part of him light up inside like a fucking bonfire and suddenly, the world was a beautiful place. "You're the only Jules, in the whole fucking universe and don't you forget!"Fuck my life
"It's not fair!" Kenya murmured, lethargically while rubbing her eyelids."Stop, moving." Jules scolded from behind her. He had been given the task of taming her wild fro into cornrows, something he had gotten experience from the countless times he did it for his mother. "And what's not fair?""Why do you have to go to a fair with some girl? When we came all the way here to go with you and have fun."He laughed. "You did not come all the way here to go to the fair with me, don't be ridiculous besides we are still going to have fun together. I'm just going there a bit earlier with Venus."Venus had been smiling before he popped the question. She'd just finished rereading one of her favourite books, Black holes and Baby Universes and Other Essays. "Listen to this, Jules" she'd said eyes closed and cheeks flushed. "Black holes of stellar mass
Jules didn't die—he wasn't all that certain though.Although his limbs were still attached to his body, his heart, stomach, and ego had taken some serious clobbering.The drive to Oakville's annual fair was just half an hour and during that time Jules thought he just might die."Jules!" Venus had screamed when his hold on her neared suffocating. "You're crushing me!""Ah, sorry." He'd said loosening his grip. Just a little."You know," she'd slowed down for a second, turning her head to give him a backward glance, visor up. "If I didn't see it for myself in people's heads I wouldn't have ever believed you were Oakville's very own heartthrob/football star. I mean aren't you supposed to be all male with testosterone oozing out of your pores."OuchJules had responded with. "Keep your eyes on the road."
Jules tied the laceson his shoes for the thirteenth time since they arrived. He can feel Lars's annoyance next to him like a suffocating fog."Do that again, and I'll knife you," he murmured.Jules visibly tensed before sitting up and pretending to straighten his tie. "I hate it when you go all gangster on me. You're my manager, not my dealer.""Old habits die hard," Lars replied with a wistful sigh.Jules glared at him completely forgetting the tightness in his chest for a second. "That's not funny.""Then stop acting so nervous. You have had book signings, interviews,fundraiserand much more. This isn't even your first book reading. You're used to this, so what's with all the nerves?"Confusion and heartache swirled suddenly inside his stomach. Twisting and dipping as he tried to find the words. "This is the first time I've been b
Jules didn't realizehis couch was alive. Until now, that is.Before now, he wouldn't have had any reason to notice. After all, he barely spent up till an hour sitting on it. Since he didn't watch tv. No, he watched anime. In his room, on his laptop in HD.But Jules was laying on his couch now, he didn't know long it had been, a millennial was it felt like. But in reality it was probably a few hours, he wasn't sure though since time seemed to have lost its meaning. And the longer he stayed like this. The more certain he was over the discovery that; yes, his couch was actually alive.When it was touched, it moaned.When it was poked, it moaned.When it was disturbed, it moaned.It didn't breathe though, it couldn't. But that's okay, Jules couldn't breathe either. It didn't make him any less alive.Jules couldn't breathe,
The whole family was in a cycle of perpetual happiness. That lasted for seven days, the time it took to prepare for the surgery.Jules had told Carrie first, and she cried and cried and cried. She held onto him so tight, kissing both his cheeks were also wet. Then he told Venus step-brothers and Merlin cried.And Jules was happy. Happy she wanted to live, try, stay and not just for him, but for her. It was something she had taught him. Months ago when the demons of his past hung around him like a dark shadow, a thick suffocating fog. When he felt responsible for two deaths and refused to die himself because he wanted to suffer.But things had changed and not just for him, for both of them. Jules and Venus had collided but they didn't destroy, they created.Even now, that's what they did."Are you okay?" Venus asked, but she wasn't really asking. She was just reading the words out of the pr
After a moment, Julescut through the heavy silence that crashed landed in the room. "What on earth, is he saying?"When Venus didn't say anything. He realized all of a sudden that she had stopped crying. And somehow her silence was worse than the sound of her sobbing."He's joking, right?" His throat felt horribly tight.Tell me he's joking."I'm tired," she whispered. Like it was the answer to all his questions. And in a way it was. In a way, everything was turning crystal clear.She was quiet but he was loud. His breathing was loud, his heartbeat was loud, even his voice was loud. "You can't be serious?"But she was and he couldn't breathe. "I'm tired." She repeated again like he didn't hear her the first time. "I'm tired, Jules.""You're giving up? You want to die?!" He must be shouting, his ears were ringing and his throat was hurti
Jules was screaming.This time he knew it was him. This time he knew that that horrible keening sound belonged to him. But even though he knew it, it didn't change that fact that he couldn't stop.It took him longer than it should to calm down. It took him longer than it should to stop breaking. It took him longer than it should to call 911. It took longer than it should for them to understand what he was saying. Because he was sure for a solid minute all he was saying wasmy planet is dying.God,bless the operator because she waited all past his ramblings. She must have realized that he sounded to broken for this to be a prank. So she waited calmly until he finally gave her actually facts other than;my planet is dying.Then Jules called Carrie as he held Venus. His hand on her chest taking tiny solace from the steady thumps of her heart. She was
"Drop it over there, please," Marie said, pointing to the spot beside the dresser.Jules dropped the box. He wiped off the sweat accumulating at the top of his forehead and stretched. "That's the last of it." He said to her."Thanks, sweetie." She said. "You've been a huge help." The moving truck had just left. He had spent the whole afternoon helping Marie move her stuff into their house."It's okay," he replied, then pulled out a folded photograph and handed it to her. "When I was taking some boxes to Kenya's room. I tipped over the trash can by accident and found this inside."Marie's smile disappeared as she gazed at the photo of Kenya and her father. "Oh dear," she whispered tracing her daughter's smile in the picture with her finger. "She's still so angry at him."Jules folded his arms. "It's not like she doesn't have a reason to be." His voice was angry. "He
Venus was the firstthing Jules saw when he entered his Biology class.His mouth dropped open and she sat up a little straighter.He sat down and she said. "Surprise."Venus had started coming to school less and less until she stopped coming altogether. School became more boring than usual, a chore he had to get over with so he could rush home and see her. So seeing her here was a treat. Even with her skin so pale it was translucent, her tired eyes and her tired smile.He smiled at her and said, "I love you," as naturally as he would say 'hello'Her answering smile made his heart jump. He wanted to take a picture, but he restrained himself and took her hand instead.Mr. Alston was pleasantly surprised when he walked into class. He stood by the door for second taking her in, worry swirling in his eyes. But when Venus glanced at him, he looked away quic
Marie pulled his head gently to her chest. Jules felt his self-restraint disappear as drops of moisture left his eyes. "Everyone," he whispered, "everyone has told me time and time again that it isn't my fault. And sometimes I believe them. But then sometimes I have these dreams-nightmares where she gets into the car and dies. Then my dad is shouting over and over that it is my fault. And there is blood on my hands, her blood because," his voice cracked, "I killed her.""No, Jules," she gasped, pulling him closer, tighter. "You can't actually believe that. You didn't kill your mother, she got in that car on her own free will. I bet if she were here even knowing the truth she'd still do it again. And as for your father, he loves you so much, you know that right?"Jules didn't say anything but his silence spoke volumes."Jules," disbelief colored her voice. "You can't still believe Jace doesn't love you. I
Jules tugged at his hair in frustration. "Damn, this is so hard."Venus touched the hand, clutching his hair. "It doesn't have to be."He shook his head vigorously and water droplets found its way to her. "I don't think I can do this.""Jesus, Jules, can you like not do that?" her face screwed up in what was supposed to be a disgusted look. But Jules found the crease of her nose too cute to take her seriously. "And please enough with the drama. We came here to swim, not to see you agonize yet again on how you're going to end your manga."Jules pouted, "You're so mean today."Venus rolled her eyes, but a small smile was already blossoming and he felt his chest swell at the sight. "I'm always mean.""True that," Merlin chirped from behind him. Jules turned to take in the sight, yet again of both their families having a fun day at the pool.