Dorian's P.O.V.Noah didn’t say a fucking word or look at anyone. He just pulled his gear on with this quiet, rigid dignity that made my chest ache. His hands shook only once, when he started to fix on his skates.. I caught it—of course I fucking did. My eyes hadn’t left him for more than a second since he walked in.The silence in the locker room was worse than shouting. Worse than punches. It was the kind of quiet that clung to your skin, crawled under your clothes and made your spine itch. Like everyone was pretending he wasn’t there, like if they didn’t speak, maybe he’d vanish.Hell, even Matt—the fucking loudmouth who never shut the fuck up—was quiet.It felt like the fucking Twilight Zone.I wanted someone to say something. Anything. Shout. Fight. Even spit. Just fucking acknowledge the elephant in the room. But no—this kind of silence was a different kind of violence. One Noah didn’t deserve.I hated every goddamn second of it. The door suddenly flew open, slamming against th
Dorian's P.O.VI felt like shit as I realized Jaxon knew the guy in the picture was me. It wasn't surprisingly really seeing as he caught us at the store just a few days ago, but the hatred in his eyes as he glared at me made me feel sick to my stomach.Because Jaxon was right. I was hiding and letting Noah stomach all of it. I stood frozen when I should have stepped in and protected him. I let everyone stare at him as if he was broken while I played the part of the nonchalant aloof guy. But in reality, I was just a fucking coward.After Jaxon finished, no one dared to say a word. They just looked away and got dressed. With a sneer on his face Jaxon retreated back to his locker which was next to Noah's and they began discussing in hushed tones. Noah said something in a low voice to Jaxon, and Jaxon nodded, keeping his hand on Noah’s shoulder, protective as hell. They stayed like that for a minute, with Noah talking and Jaxon listening. Like they were in their own bubble.Jealousy burn
Noah’s P.O.VI didn’t expect Jaxon to show up beside me like that. Not after I’d looked him straight in the eye and told him nothing was going on between me and Dorian. Denying every single thing.But he still stood next to me. He didn’t care what the guys thought. And even if he didn’t say it out loud, I knew—he fucking knew that it was Dorian. And yet, he kept his mouth shut and let everyone assume he was the mystery guy.I respected the hell out of him for that but it didn’t mean it still didn’t sting. Watching the guys I’d bled with, fought for, and led....watching them turn away like I’d stepped into the locker room with something contagious made my heart ache. No one said anything to me, not a single fucking peep. All they dared was glances, words muttered under their breaths and disgust that hung in the air like mold.Except for Greg. He didn’t act weird nor did he say much either, but at least he looked me in the eye when I passed and gave me a quiet nod.I tried to focus duri
Noah’s P.o.VI couldn’t say anything…not at first. My jaw was locked tight, hands jammed deep in my pocket that my fingers were starting to cramp. But the silence wasn’t peaceful. It was loud as fuck in my head.The second he said her name, it was like my brain started working in slow motion while my thoughts scrambled to catch on. And it didn’t take much for everything to click. If Tina Hayes was his mom and a patient at Lakeview rehab, then…Fuck.She had to be a drug addict, or recovering. But Dorian never said anything. Not even fucking once. Not even when we got drunk and he told me bits and pieces from his childhood. Perhaps I should have guessed then, but maybe it was easier to keep Dorian in a neat little box of anger, and pride and trouble. It was easier to fall in love him, when I didn’t have to understand every facets of him. God, but I wished he’d told me sooner. My chest felt weird, not tight exactly but it was as if there was too much air in the room and none of it cou
Fuck. Noah was so hot.There was something about Noah when he was like that. Lying there naked on my bed, cock dripping, golden hair all fucked up as he ransacked my drawers looking for condoms, as though he was going to combusted if he waited another second.Climbing off the bed, I peeled off the rest of my clothes, kicked off my jeans like a man possessed, and sat back, fisting my cock with one hand while I waited for Noah to get them. Fuck, why did he have to look so fucking hot? My dick was hard to the point of pain, needing to be buried deep inside him right now.As he reached into my drawer, finally, he suddenly stopped..My brows furrowed and I slowed down from stroking my cock as I watched Noah slowly turn around, holding something in his hand.A picture frame.At first, I was confused. It was probably just a dumb picture of me as a kid. I didn't remember what exactly photo my face was in these days seeing as my mom hid most of my childhood photos anyway. Who gave a shit?But
Dorian's P.O.VThe morning light was already pouring in when I cracked open my eyes, one arm reaching for the warm weight I’d fallen asleep beside.But the bed was cold and empty.I blinked blearily, the haze of sleep fading just in time to hear footsteps and pacing. Noah’s sharp and furious voice cut through the air like a knife.“Dorian, why the fuck did you do this?”I sat up fast, heart slamming against my ribs. He was standing across the room, his phone in hand, glaring at me as if I’d just killed someone.“What are you—” I started, but then he turned the screen to face me.Fuck.I just sighed and flopped back onto the mattress, covering my face with my forearm. “I thought you deactivated your Innagram account.”“No, I didn’t, asshole,” Noah snapped. “I just switched off my phone. For you. For us.”His voice cracked, and I winced.Of course. Of course he’d see it. I’d hoped—stupidly, desperately—that maybe we could just have this one weekend. That we could pretend. Stay in this l
Noah's P.O.VWe holed out in Dorian’s childhood bedroom for hours, having sex on every surface we could find, followed by long and aching conversations in the dark. I didn’t think I’d ever see Dorian soft like that, sprawled out beside me naked under an old quilt, moonlight striping his face. His mouth always tasted like coffee or sarcasm. I couldn’t get enough of either.But outside that room, the world was on fire.Dorian's confession broke the fucking internet.Some people applauded him for owning it. Others painted him like some manipulative predator who backed a straight guy into a corner. “Taking advantage,” they called it. “Desperate for attention.”And then there were the "couple fan" edits.Innocent pictures of us laughing at the rink during practice. Or when we hugged each other, the way teammates did after a win from a tough game. The edits made it seem as if I was looking at Dorian like he hung the moon. Screenshots from old games where I’d supposedly stared too long. “#Do
Dorian's POVNoah was willing to give it all up. The team. His reputation. His golden boy future. For me.I sat there like a goddamn idiot in the coach’s office while Noah bared his neck like a lamb to slaughter, ready to burn down his entire life with one spark if it meant shielding me. I think it broke something inside me. Or maybe it fixed something. I don’t know. All I knew was that I couldn’t breathe right since.Who the hell does that for someone like me?It was the most beautiful, reckless, stupid thing anyone had ever done for me, and I felt like the world’s biggest fucking asshole. Because now...now that I was in deep, now that I loved him, I couldn't stop thinking about the way I’d fantasized about tearing him down before I even got to know the real him. I used to hate the sight of him. Now I was obsessed with it.With everything inside of me, I wanted to come clean, tell him everything and fall on my knees if I had to. But in the same breath, I also wanted to keep him forev
Noah's P.O.V The long drive from campus to my home felt like a slow trek to my own execution. By the time I pulled up to the front of my family’s mansion, the same looming, white-stoned fortress I'd grown up in, it had gotten even darker. My tires crunched over the long winding driveway which was filled with floodlights along the stone paths down which cut through the Late night November darkness. I killed the engine, and left my hands on the steering wheel, breathing in and out. For a second, I just sat there, staring up at the massive house like it was about to swallow me whole. It was like a giant beast carved into hill, the many floor-to-ceiling glass windows reflecting lights causing the house to glow all by itself. Beside me, Dorian whistled low from the passenger seat. "Jesus," he muttered, turning to me with raised brows. "You lived here your whole life?" He shoved the door and stepped out, craning his neck to take it all in; the ivy wrapped columns, the massive lak doors
Noah's P.O.VThe long drive from campus to my home felt like a slow trek to my own execution. By the time I pulled up to the front of my family’s mansion, the same looming, white-stoned fortress I'd grown up in, it had gotten even darker. My tires crunched over the long winding driveway which was filled with floodlights along the stone paths down which cut through the Late night November darkness.I killed the engine, and left my hands on the steering wheel, breathing in and out. For a second, I just sat there, staring up at the massive house like it was about to swallow me whole. It was like a giant beast carved into hill, the many floor-to-ceiling glass windows reflecting lights causing the house to glow all by itself.Beside me, Dorian whistled low from the passenger seat."Jesus," he muttered, turning to me with raised brows. "You lived here your whole life?" He shoved the door and stepped out, craning his neck to take it all in; the ivy wrapped columns, the massive lak doors and
Noah's P.O.VThe bass thudded so hard through the walls it rattled the red Solo cup in my hand. I wasn't even sure what I was drinking anymore but it clearly was something sweet and carbonated that burned my throat going down. It didn’t matter anyway because I was here to get shit faced drunk and forget why I even was alive.I leaned back against the wall of the sorority house, blinking against the strobe lights flashing through the crowd. There were bodies all around me. Everyone was sweaty, drunk and sloshing drinks everywhere. However I felt...empty as though I was watching it all through a thick glass window.But even through the blur of it, my eyes kept betraying me as they flickered back to where Dorian stood surrounded by a small harem of girls. All of them were gorgeous—perfect bodies, perfect makeup, shrieking with laughter at whatever bullshit he was saying.I couldn't stopooking at him.I kept telling myself not to and just be normal, have fun and to let go, but every damn
Noah’s P.O.VIt has been three days since that Thanksgiving dinner with Jaxon’s family and I swear to God, it might as well have been three years with how fucking hectic everything got afterward. Long hours, harder drills, screaming matches on the ice because Coach kept grinding us down to the bone. Everyone was running on fumes, trying to stay sharp for the last (8th) game of the regionals, but I felt like I was back in fucking hell week.On the...somewhat...bright side, Dorian was finally back with us. Coach had unbenched him after I promised to not let our personal relationship or the lack of it affect the twam , and for a minute, I thought things might go back to normal. Dorian stayed out of my way during practice and he'd gone back to his usual animosity, not speaking to anyone before and after practice. But when it came time for Coach to list the starting lineup for the final games, Dorian’s name wasn’t on it. I caught the flicker of hurt that crossed his face when Coach said i
Noah's P.O.VThanksgiving NightThe scent of roasted garlic and slow-cooked turkey clung to every inch of the Reid house. I could hear Mrs. Reid’s voice from the kitchen yelling at someone, probably Anna, for trying to taste-test the cranberry sauce before dinner. The house was glowing warm, every hallway and room filled with soft laughter and rich aromas and the sounds of a family that loved being around each other.I’d only been here for less than a day, and already it felt more like home than anywhere I’d ever known, making me wonder how I'd managed to stay away all these past months. It was no wonder I usually spent every holiday with the Reids.Dinner was chaos in the best way. The table was bustling with passed plates and overlapping conversations. Sebastian, for someone who claimed he was bad with families, had already managed to make every single Reid sister laugh at least once. The fourth oldest, Clarissa, I think, giggled so hard she choked on her wine when he deadpanned th
Noah’s POVI winced so hard my spine nearly folded in half.Jaxon’s dad had a warm smile on his face and it was the kind of genuine one that made you feel instantly welcome, but right now it felt like a thousand-pound spotlight was on me. Because he was looking directly at me, assuming that Sebastian, Jaxon’s boyfriend, was mine.I risked a glance at Jaxon because I really didn't know if Jaxon was ready to tell his family.However, he looked surprisingly calm, lips pressed together, brows just slightly lifted. Then, he gave me a discreet nod. I'm ready.Right. Okay.I opened my mouth, ready to clear it up, but before I could even get past a single vowel, a hurricane in the form of a woman barreled into the room.“Oh mio Dio, i miei bambini!” she gasped out.She was tiny. Tiny, but her presence was enormous—fiery dark curls pinned back with two clips that were barely doing their job, red apron tied snug around her waist, and a look in her eyes like she was about to scold us into next w
Noah's P.O.VThe second I stepped out of my car, they jumped apart like kids caught making out behind the bleachers. Jaxon’s eyes flicked toward me, looking sheepish and… weirdly guilty? His hair was a mess from where the guy had clearly been gripping it. They looked like they’d been going at it for more than just a friendly peck.Oh my God.Oh my actual fucking God.“You might be surprised tomorrow,” Jaxon had said.This was the fucking surprise?Jaxon fucking Reid. Mr. “I’ve had a threesome with the Henderson twins.” Mr. “Choke me with your thighs, mommy,” himself… was gay too?And it was with his tutor? The same one I’d seen once or twice in the background when Jaxon was FaceTiming him at odd hours while claiming to be "studying" with him? That really pretty guy with the flawless skin and the glasses he probably didn’t even need?I blinked hard. “Am I hallucinating right now?”Jaxon raised both hands like I was holding him at gunpoint, pouring out words as he tried to dig himself o
Noah's P.O.VI didn’t remember the moment when I left the store and got on the road, driving to Jaxon's family house. Hell, I couldn’t even tell you what was playing on the speakers, even though I knew it was that stupid ass playlist Jaxon had shared with me—grunge and rock and some country-folk hybrid that made me want to pull my hair out when he'd begged me to indulge him. Right now, my brain was loud, louder than any music could ever be.Outside, the snow fell heavier now, little white streaks dancing past the windshield, like the universe was throwing static at my face just to see if I’d blink.I didn’t because I was still thinking about him.His mouth. The kiss wouldn't fucking leave my brain. It was as if his lips was still crushing mine and his breath lived in my lungs. My lips tingled with the need to be back on his and now all I could think about was how fast it ended. I shifted in my seat, groaning through clenched teeth. My dick was pressing up against the seam of my jeans
Noah's P.O.VI kept my eyes on the road, both hands tight on the wheel like I was holding on for dear fucking life. My heart was pounding loud enough to compete with the engine’s low growl. Every building I passed just made the nerves worse, like some countdown to a moment I didn’t know if I was ready for. Why the hell was I even nervous?It’s just Dorian.Except it wasn’t just Dorian.It was the first boy I ever wanted and was bold enough to let into my heart. The boy who got under my skin and twisted every part of me into knots. The boy who broke me, and the boy I still wanted, like a fucking masochist.When I finally pulled into the parking lot, I sat there for a second, dragging in a deep breath, then another. I could just leave. Text Coach and tell him I dropped the message. But no matter how much I tried to reverse out of here, I couldn't.. My fingers were already gripping the door handle, and then I was out, snow pelting lightly on my skin.The warm off-white lights of the stor