4

Fleur’s point of view 

FLASHBACK

Five Years Ago

Tonight is the night I'm losing my virginity. I know that I'm not the first girl to do this so as far as feeling like a paid pretty woman, I just think of it as losing it to an ex boyfriend. desperate times calls for desperate measures as what people say.

It's not a big deal losing it, for I was never interested in dating or had the urge to do it, so sex just wasn't on the menu! I've seen what relationship does to a person. 

I grew up with my mother only. According to my mother, My father left us for another girl when I turned one, and that's fine because my mom rocks. She had me when she was just about to turn 21. She's an orphan so it makes sense that she got her strong personality for not having anyone from the start. She's brilliant, school and street smart but life didn't destined her to go to college.

She had to work three jobs so she could raise me. she had always instilled having an education will help you get somewhere, this is something no one can ever take away from you. It was hard to do all these but like i said she's a brilliant person. She was able to show me love by making time no matter what the occasion. She taught me to be innovative and practical about life. its family that matters.

Growing up, I didn't have all the luxury but because my mother was beautiful. She dresses very classy something I didn't learn. She would always have suitors; however, she would never be committed. I guess she was traumatised by what my dad did to her.

She vowed to never again fall in love and be stupid about it. She never talked about my father nor did i want to know for her world has become all about me and I came to know this at a young age of 11.

To win my mom, her suitors would give us all kinds of gifts even paid for our bills. This is a privileged of her beauty, but my mom has the wit that can match her look. If she knows she cant pay for certain things i needed in school she would somehow be good with insinuating things to her suitor.

She would let them sleep with her at times maybe because she's bored but never go into a whole relationship. none of her boyfriends ever slept over for she was scared that they might hurt or do something to me. She's very over protective sometimes but i grew up knowing that this is all coming from a good place. We also move from one city to another as she follows where the money pays better.

She's very good at leading any men who would stumble on her path. one of the greatest gifts she gave me is the knowledge to Never let any man use me and value yourself first. I'm glad that she's sexually open to me and this is why its not big of a deal to sell my virginity.

I love my mother so much and this is just a small payback for all that love.

It's just her and me against the world—what a cliche' and it is what it is.

I'm in my senior year and just recently turned 19 years old. I'm one year late in school because there's a time that we struggled, and I need to work full time to help my mom, she was agaisnt this but it was already too late when she found out that I dont attend any of my classes just so i could work full time. its the biggest fight we've ever had. I only did that for im feeling sorry on how hard she was working.

Her body was overworked and she doesnt believe in taking any vacation. It took a huge toll on her health. When we learned that my mother has cancer, and her insurance no longer covers the needed treatments. We have tried to talk to the people in the insurance company as to why suddenly the policy has changed but what can an ordinary person like me do. I was madly desperate to save my mother.

The idea of selling my virginity came from Vina.

My co-worker from the restaurant I'm doing part-time every weekend. She's our manager. I became close to her ever since she started working in our branch. She has become my sister always so thoughtful and very generous on giving me leeway on shifts to pick up for extra cash. I have no idea how she knew my situation but were living in a small town so I just assumed people talk.

I was on my break when Vina came up to me, holding on to a piece of crumpled paper. That day is also the day I got the letter from the culinary university stating that I got in but with no scholarship.  I thought with all the hardwork and recommendations from all my teachers, I would get atleast one year of scholarship especially when everybody praised my admission letter.

This is supposedly my ticket to way out to struggling. Its what me and mother have been waiting for this whole time. This education can help me learn to sustain my own business. I can't be an employee forever.

When the opportunity was presented, I thought it was a joke. It even took me a week to decided and very skeptical. But when my mother collapse in the house while I was out working. It was a decision needed to be done.

We need the money. 

This is such a no-brainer decision. It's just one night of protected sex that I wouldn't even remember, so I went ahead and took Vina's offer to auction me out in her secret society life. I didnt even think anyone would buy my virginty within hours. I was shocked at how the money was given the minute I signed the contract.

I'm not so skilled at putting makeup on but after attempting to do so, I doubled checked my bank account online and transferred the required money for mom's hospital bill. I couldn't believe that my virginity can get me a pretty hefty amount

I can pay off my mother's bill, and I can start my way to becoming a chef. Whatever is left with the money, it would probably last us two years and we can make it work.

"That's it! The money is spent." I say this loudly as I hear the ping on my phone for the payment confirmation.

I called my mom in the hospital to let her know everything will be alright. I couldn't be there with her for the man who has paid for my virginity has strictly schedule our meeting tonight.

I didnt know how to explain this to my mother so instead I lied about going to a meeting for a scholar funding. She so believed and my heart broke for she cried that her dreams for me is slowly coming true. I hung up the call before we start balling our eyes out.

A huge sigh more of relief that my mom is getting her treatment after this, I will force her to go to bahamas with me for a full week. I will convince her by saying its a gradutaion gift.

"No more backing out. It's just sex. maybe the client won't even do it. Who knows." i say this to myself talking in front of the mirror like a crazy person would.

The man scheduled this meeting two weeks after he paid. He wasn't in a rush; maybe he does this all the time. I have no idea who this person is,

Vina assured me it's safe since she did this herself and i trust her. I would get text messages from Vina about updates and details but never the identity of the buyer. She simply said its the lawyer that always on the front and never really met the guy.

She said its best to meet the client on the night so that it wouldn't give me so much anxiety or have some kind of attachment. I felt like she's a pro at this and doubted her a little but desperation over powered all that.

So tonight is the night I meet him.

As I stop mumbling, I quickly did a small retouch on my make up look, borrowing my mothers stash, I did a simple little dab of blush, I put in with a topliner mix with mascara finishing it with liner lipsticks that i cant seem to stop licking for the sweetness of it.

I didn't really know what to do with my hair I simply blow dried it and curling the bottom a little.

I decided not to wear anything sexy or fancy.

I don't want the person to think I'm some cheap girl, and It's just going to be a one night stand.

I laugh, thinking I would've worn a business suit if I own one to mean business, plus it's a one-time thing.

This will not even matter in the future.

I'm sure whoever ill be with in the future will accept me and didn't need this one night of my life to know, so I wore a simple white top, jeans with matching nude underwear.

While looking in the mirror, I tell myself this:

I'm there to sell one of the essential commodities that matter, and that is my virginity, nothing else.

I made sure that I smell good and that I look presentable.

I heard the doorbell buzz.

I opened my door without peeking through the peephole, for I already know who it will be.

A tall good looking, well-groomed man in a black suit with a sleek haircut greeted me with his nice pearly white teeth.

Is this the man who I'm sleeping with tonight?

"Hello, good evening, ma'am. My name is Dan. I'm here to pick you up and bring you to the location."

"Hi, Dan... I'll just grab my things and head out in a minute."

"Sure, ma'am ill be waiting in the car."

I find it strange how he knew who I was right away. I guess he wasn't the guy who I'm sleeping with with tonight... probably some old fat guy... oooh god.

Maybe I should drink alcohol before doing the deed.

I am now getting nervous. this is the first time that it hits me.

It is happening. I need to suck this one up, anything for my mother.

I got my bag, locked the front door, and walked straight to a fancy black car.

The drive was quiet.

I didn't want to make any small talk, nor did Dan offer any. All I hear is my deep breathing and letting out a loud one every minute to calm me.

I would catch him look at me from the rearview mirror from time to time.

As we get to our destination.

I've seen a long stretch of a driveway with multiple security gate access before we could reach the entrance. there were alot of greenery and huge trees surrounding the mansion.

I was dropped off at the most lavish door that anyone can have. the door were so tall, it felt like its made for giants. the design were so modern. It's simply breathtaking. I look back over my shoulder and see that this mansion had a huge front lawn that screams all the modern luxury in the world with lots of cameras. This person must be really set and whats with the cameras.

I'm not going to lie; I'm now regretting that I didn't dress up for this. What in the world was I thinking not dressing up. I am double nervous. My feet are numb, and I can't seem to move.

Everything now has become a blur!