Chapter 5

Danielle's POV 

I was numb for several minutes. Thousands of thoughts ran through my head. The room was silent, too silent. I could hear the rapid sound of my heartbeat. I blinked hard, coming slowly into realization.

How? Why? How!!!

I slapped my palm on my head. Looking around, I took the off-white fluffy duvet that was on the ground and wrapped it around my body. Perhaps I could still make it. If I get there and beg them, give them a suitable excuse for not being punctual…

I looked around and found my dress scattered around the room. I could feel the tears fall to the surface of my eyes. I cannot miss my exams! I need the scholarship. To think I did this…

I shook my head and walked around to pick up my dress. Passing through an aluminum door, I found my way to the bathroom and dressed up. What if I never get to do the exams and forfeit the scholarship?

Forfeit? My skin prickled at the mere thought of missing my scholarship. It was almost midday and…hush. 

I ran my fingers through my hair and packed it in a bun. My eyes darted around the room in search of my purse. It was lying next to the man on the bed. I sighed and shut my eyes, taking a long deep breath. 

He's a stranger. I don't know him, we never met. I took my purse and left the room as soon as I could. I tried to balance my movement; I felt like my brain was rolling over anytime I took a step.

I called Clara but the cheek-ass didn't pick up her calls. Of all times to get fucked! Well…not fucked as in fucked, I mean scholarship fucked not… argh!

I didn't bother to wait or look for Clara. I board a cab down to the examination center. Getting down from the cab, I felt an instant splash of water on my body. I swept my gaze over the car that sped down the road toward Manhattan Beach.

Could today be any worse? I rushed down to the hall and found a few people walking around the hall. They didn't look like the exam officers. I sighed and hoped…hoped for what I know is already far from reach.

"Excuse me, please are you an exam officer or do you happen to know any around here who is" I tried asking one of the people walking around but he intersected my words.

"They are done. It ended about an hour and a half ago. We're just here to clean up. I'm sure you can see for yourself."

I nodded slowly. Why do I feel surprised when I already knew what I was going to hear? I missed it. I missed my exams, missed my scholarship, and lost Davis all within twenty-four hours.

I read my gut out. If I had just stayed back home, perhaps I would be telling a different story. My phone rang, it was Clara.

"Hey, girl. Where have you been since yesterday? Babe, I have searched this whole hotel and you are nowhere to be found. I concluded you would have gone for your exams seeing that you didn't pick up my calls, you must be done with it. Tell me, how was it? Did you kill it? I'm sure you did."

Her words fell on deaf ears. I hung up and tossed the phone in my purse. I'm a loser. My virginity, my boyfriend, my scholarship…humph.

*******

I walked into the house and found Pa by the little bar counter sipping on liquor and reading a newspaper with the brown reading glasses used every Sunday. He probably couldn't find the black tiny one.

"Aha. There is my girl. I've been waiting since yesterday. How was your prom? I thought you would be back yesterday but I realized you took the route to your exams…"

Pa stopped talking when he saw the tears fall from my eyes. I dropped on the couch, wrestling with the thought of being a disappointment yet again. I sniffed and allowed the pain to flow. I didn't hold back, the tears fell on their own accord and I watched as Pa used his red handkerchief to clean the tops of my cheeks.

"What happened? Why are you in so many tears?"

"I…I couldn't…"

"Hush," he hugged me and patted my back as I wailed. The weight of my distress weighed me down. "It's okay D. It's okay. Everything is okay."

After a few minutes, I dropped crying and looked up at Pa. He seemed to be in a bad mood, I just realized he wore the black satin he hated the most.

"D, what the fuck! Where have you been?" Clara barged in and sat beside me. She noticed my eyes were still moist, or so I thought.

"I didn't make it to the exam…I…I guess I slept in the wrong room and woke up late and…"

"D, if you are joking. It was really expensive. That's impossible."

I hissed in frustration. "Have I ever been this serious when I'm talking to you?" 

"Then…you shouldn't feel that bad about it and forget about Devis. There are other guys out there and there are other exams for you to write."

"It's easier for you to say," I retorted to Clara. "I read my life out Clara, you know that." Clara kept quiet. 

Pa said nothing. He certainly wouldn't have the words. I should have listened to myself and stuck to my books but he insisted and told me to go for the so-called prom. Well, my life just became more miserable.

I stood up and went to my room. Crying has no solution to my current situation. I carefully took off my dress and took a warm bath with the rose bubbles I bought last week for the Craings Mall.

I rested my head on the tub. My bathroom door opened slowly, accompanied by Clara's peeping face. "Can I come in?" She asked. I nodded. She started buttoning down her vintage shirt.

I shot her a disgruntled look. "Why are you undressing?"

"Well, you know you cannot live without me. I was worried some kind of monster would take you off the face of the earth."

I smiled and rested my head back. "Not if you're the monster. Where did you put your phone and why'd I end up in that room

…that disgusting room full of ill related things."

"D, I'm sorry."

Clara? Apologizing? She'd rather die than say those words. "Are you sure you aren't still high for the liquor you took?"

"I'm serious D. It's just…I know you must be feeling like the worst person on earth. I know how hard you have prepared for this exam and I didn't expect that you'd miss the exams. I'll make it up to you okay? We can go to see a movie if you like."

I dropped a heavy sigh. "What are you worried about?" I said. "It's not the worst of all. I am always trying again and I am not thinking about Davis, not even the slightest." That was a bloody lie. 

Every inch of me is burning and trembling. I squeezed out a smirk. "I will be okay tomorrow in school."

"It won't be easy for you to stay here at home all by yourself, I'll stay with you tonight." Clara said and joined me in the tub.

*******

The next day,

"Well well well, you brought both your legs down to school after making out with Jack on prom day. I saw how you left the room the next day, Danielle or D. Such a dick, like your name." Isabelle ran in front of my desk in school.

I ignored her like I used to and kept on reading the Economics textbook I was reading.

"Who did you fuck that night?"

It was as if a bee stung my brain. Worst case, I don't know him. How did she…