I was finding my inner Zen and gaining a close personal relationship with herbal teas instead. Raspberry and Tangerine Zinger had been pleasant sur- prises, I must admit. I made a cup of the Raspberry Zinger and called Benny."Hello, my lovely darling." "I miss you. What are you up to tonight?" I asked, hoping I didn't sound too pathetic."Ricardo's here and we're just done with dinner.""Ahhh, well, why did you even answer the phone? You're busy. Sorry for interrupting, I just wanted to give you a drive-by love blast." "No, no, no, my sweet. Not so fast. What is going on with you?" Ben was without a doubt the most emotionally intuitive man on the planet. He couldsniff out the smallest innuendo and go wild with possible scenarios. I'd seen him in action enough to know."Nothing is going on with me," I lied. "You're busy and have company. Call me tomorrow, okay?""No. Ricardo's sorting out some work business on a call of his own. Start talking.I sighed into the phone. Why did I call
It was weird thinking about all that again. There were no hard feelings about Karl, no feelings period. Karl had actually treated me pretty decently considering what my reputation had been in high school, but I'd shut down after the inci- dent and was unable to look anyone in the eye who had seen the images of me on that video. I wonder what Karl thought when he saw it. Was he trying to comfort me because he felt sorry for what had happened, or was he hoping to get some more action out of me? Who knew? I'm sure I never knew at the time, nor did I much care. I was too busy trying to find my way out of this life.I wrote a happy-happy-nice-nice message back to Jess wishing her luck with him, and logged out of Facebook.I had a new life now. In London... with Ethan...and the baby I was having.Neil sat across from me and looked more affected than I'd ever seen him in my life.I didn't blame him, really. Telling him that we no longer need worry that Brynne might have got tainted food or
I stayed planted at least seven feet from where she was and kicked off my shoes. She sat up on the couch and stretched, arching her back and chest toward me in invitation. We still hadn't spoken a word to each other, but so much had already been communicated. We were going to go at it like beasts and it would be excruciatingly good. Like always. So... having a mutual strip show, huh? Sounds goddamn perfect to me.Me first. I had more clothes to get rid of than she did. I think I was smiling. If it wasn't showing on the outside, I had a fucking clown grin going on the in- side. I worked the buttons on my shirt slowly, watching her watch me as her eyes grew smoky. I shrugged it off my shoulders and let it drop to the floor. I kicked it away with my foot and blinked at her.Your turn, my beauty.She did a move that I dearly love, and one she does so well it ought to be ille- gal. She raised her arms and crossed palms behind her neck and dragged them upward through her hair flexing her ne
Ethan scooped me off the couch and into his arms. I lifted my eyes and got that wave of emotion again as his blues found me. I loved him so much I knew the fear. I'd heard others speak about it. I'd read about it in books. Now I under- stood. The fear that you have when you finally give your heart away to another person. It makes you very vulnerable to loss. If you never love anyone, then you'll never be hurt when they don't love you back or when they leave you.I finally had the practical experience of understanding. It sucked.Ethan sensed my newfound knowledge, I think. He studied me with intuitive eyes that looked very dark blue at the moment, and ducked his head down to meet my lips. He kissed me there in front of the window while holding me naked in his arms. I melted into him and gave in to my goddamn emotions.He carried me down the hall to the bedroom and broke the kiss to lower me down to the bed. He saw."Oh, oh, baby... don't cry," he whispered, cupping my face and settlin
The immense pressure building was already forcing a response within me and taking me forward for an orgasm. I pushed backward on his cock to let him know it was okay to keep going. "Ahhhhh... oh, God," I said, shuddering as he pressed forward again, the stretched feeling increasing to the point of pain until it seemed impossible, my body burning up. Then suddenly a give as he filled me up completely on a stinging thrust that took him all the way home. I closed my eyes on his shout and froze at the sensation."Fuuuck. you feel so good!" He held himself still and caressed both sides of my ass with his hands. "Baby... oh. fuck me... okay?" He was having trouble with words and I certainly understood that. I was having trouble holding still, and could feel the shakes returning. The convulsions weren't pain-induced, but involuntary reactions to the incredible assault on my erogenous zone. There was minimal pain because Ethan had prepared me slowly for this experience, taking me with care, a
"I called Benny tonight," I offered after a moment.Ethan soaped up a bath sponge and drew it up my arm. "How is Clarkson? Does he want to take more pictures of you?""We didn't talk about that.""But he will." Ethan's response was nothing new. He didn't like me mod- eling, and he really didn't understand how much I needed it either. I wasn't in the habit of throwing it in his face because I didn't want him getting all upset and unreasonable again. Every time I went for a photo shoot he got irrational, so it was easier to just avoid reminding him."I think Ben's getting suspicious, and I'm sure Gaby would be too if she'd seen me in the flesh, but we've only spoken on the phone." Ethan drew the sponge over my neck. "It's time to tell them, baby, I want it announced and it has to be something big. I know that much.""Big how?""London press? Celebrity guests? Posh planning?" I stiffened in his arms. He tightened his hold around me and whispered, "Now, don't panic, okay? Our wedding has
Ethan kissed me, gentle and soft, his tongue slipping inside to tangle around lazily like there wasn't a care in the world for us right now. I felt his palm sweep down to rest low on my belly and he held it there, warm and protecting."We're gonna be okay, baby. I know we are. All three of us." I buried my face in his chest and nuzzled. "When you say it, I believe you.""It will. I know this." He lifted my face up and tapped his head with his fin- ger. "I have visions, just like you have those super powers of deduction that you told me about once." He gave me a wink."Really." I added some sarcasm, just so he'd know I was over my snit about the wedding and could go back to acceptance."Yup. You, me and our little blueberry will have our happily ever after."I had to shake my head at him. "We don't have a blueberry anymore." He feigned shock. "What happened to blueberry? Don't tell me you ate it.""You idiot." I nudged him in the ribs. "Blueberry is now raspberry." "Where are you getti
I pulled up to the redbrick house where I'd grown up in Hampstead and parked on the street."This is my dad's house,""It's lovely, Ethan. An elegant English home, just like I imagined it. The yard is beautiful.""Dad likes to keep his hands dirty with it.""I've always admired people with a green thumb. I'd like to have a garden someday but I don't know much about plants. I'd have so much to learn," she said wistfully from inside the car. "Do you feel good when you come here? Does it still feel like home to you?" She sounded a little homesick to me."Well, yeah, it does. It's the only one I ever had until I bought mine. And I know my dad would be happy to teach you anything. My mother's garden is in the back of the house. I really want you to see that." I swept my eyes over Brynne, looking beautiful as usual in a flowery dress and some purple boots. God. I loved when she wore her boots. The clothes could go but the boots could stay... any time. "Are you nervous?"She nodded. "I am...