APRILThe test results are in; I’m officially batshit crazy. No one and nothing can convince me otherwise because my thoughts have been a complete mess since I left Ace’s house, and it’s been two long ass days already. I expected that the thoughts would vanish after a day went by, but they seemed to only be getting more intense and distracting by the day. That night was wilder than any I’d ever had, one for the books. Yet, it didn’t sit right with me that I couldn’t just tuck it in a corner of my mind and let it be. I was constantly reliving every whip, every spank, every stroke, every kiss, and every life shattering orgasm that made me eager for a repeat. It’s even much worse that I got turned on each time I thought of it. Especially those moments without the blindfold when I could see every muscle in his body flex with the hottest mix of anger and primal desire. He fucked me with that vibrator like he was punishing me, but he was evidently punishing himself judging from how desp
NICKThat was the worst gut punch my emotions had ever taken. Watching April walk off after declining my request to go to lunch together sent several stings through my chest. I thought we’d developed a friendly rapport all this while, but she clearly only saw me as the guy who she was bound to by a contract. For a while now, that was the least interesting thing about her to me, and I assumed that we were at a point where we could share an innocent meal and spend some time together. Apparently, I was wrong to think so.The fact that she thought we were only joined by a sexual arrangement was hurtful, more than I’d expected it to be. With the heaviness growing in my chest, I forced myself away from the spot I’d been stuck in and made my way out of the lecture block. I’d just hit the unlock button on my car keys from a distance when some heavy breasted chic I remembered fucking last session walked up towards me, grinning and letting her boobs bounce with every step. “You look gloomy,
APRILThe stack of books before me got shorter as I picked up the next course material.There were no tests or exams in sight but I had new tutoring gigs so I needed to study up on their various course works so I’d be prepared for everything. It was almost midnight and I’d been going at it for at least four hours, so I was already starting to feel dizzy. Just as I yawned and stretched out my arms, I heard my phone ping and it lit up with the name of the last person I’d have expected to be texting me at this time of the night. Nick: Hey, April.Nick: About earlier today, I’m really sorry if you were offended by the way I addressed you outside the lecture hall. I should’ve known better than to make a joke like that when there were so many people lurking nearby. Surprised by the content, I read the message over and over. I even had to look at the contact name repeatedly to be sure that it was Nick Bright texting me and not someone else. But there was no denying that it was him since h
APRILI’ve been on a chatting streak with Nick for the past seventy two hours and it had me on cloud nine. The fact that we kept each other updated about our every activity of the day and helped each other through some tasks was a routine I enjoyed a little too much. Also, since our texts were mostly platonic and void of anything sexual, it didn’t feel like he was taking advantage of the plaything contract. We had a nice little friendly rapport between us now, one that allowed me to tease him endlessly about his fear of horror movies when he asked for us to see a movie together. That request was made two days ago and today, we met up after classes to head to a cinema near the college. During the short ride to the cinema, I teased him some more and I enjoyed his hearty laughter and how it lit up his handsome face easily. When he started to seem immune to my teasing, I decide to pull up posters of the scariest possible movies in hopes of getting a real scare out of him, but I was ple
APRIL“Oh, that…” he trailed off like he was seriously contemplating his response. “Well, my mom was a huge movie freak. She loved dragging my ass to a cinema every weekend and we binged even more movies at home. So, seeing movies makes me feel closer to her,” he had on a sad smile that made me want to reach out and hug him. “Do you mind telling me how you lost her?” I blurted out the question before I realized how invasive it was, “you don’t have to answer that if you’re not comfortable talking about it,” I quickly added. “It’s fine, I’ve worked through my grief and I’m fine sharing,” he assured me and I realized how much more emotionally mature he was in comparison to his friends. “On the first day it snowed that year, she kissed me goodbye and told me she loved me before dad drove me to Xander’s for a sleepover with the guys. But later that day, I saw the most horrible accident on TV while we were having a hell of a time and my mother’s picture was displayed as the first identi
APRIL The walk to the door of his apartment was pure torture.Sexual tension was thick in the air and we kept glancing at each other like we wanted to devour ourselves the second we got the chance. When we finally reached the door, it seemed like even more torture to watch him search for his keycard to unlock it.The second he swiped the card and the door unlocked, he practically flung it into the house and wrapped his arms around me, his lips clashing with mine possessively before I could even form another thought. Instantly, I melted into his arms, letting him whisk me into the house and press my back against the wall.As soon as I heard the door slam behind us, he was pulling at my clothes to get them off and I was doing the same. Neither of us wanted to break the kiss though, so we settled for practically ripping the clothes off each other so it wouldn’t interrupt it. Something about this kiss, this mutual devouring, this hungry roaming of hands, all of it…. Something about it
APRIL Nick seemed truly flabbergasted by my revelation, like he couldn’t wrap his head around any of it.“I don’t understand it,” his forehead creased with confusion as he created a safe distance between us, “how’s it that you feel like a slut even though you enjoy every bit of it?” At first, I was taken aback by his question, but after a few beats, I realized where he was coming from and that his confusion might be genuine. His confusion was understandable as a powerful man who was allowed to flaunt his sexual promiscuity without being shamed. Unlike me and other women, he was celebrated for being sexually active because it was expected of him. That allowed him to enjoy sexual pleasures from various consenting partners without feeling guilt, regret, or shame afterwards. “You do know that society frowns deeply upon illicit relationships like ours, right?” I asked and he shrugged, clearly unshaken by the rules of society unlike me. I had to drive my point home so I continued, “A r
APRIL There was no hiding the fact that I was surprised, the hitch in my breath and the way my eyes bulged out was enough proof. Nick clearly noticed my shock and slowly pulled his fingers out of me, smiling devilishly as he brought them to his lips and licked them squeaky clean. The slow and sensual pace choose was torturous, it made me want to lean in and kiss those unfairly pretty pink lips of his.“Go ahead, answer the question,” he prompted. “Uh, what question?” my memories blacked out the second he put his fingers in his mouth and licked them in such a distracting manner. He chuckled knowingly, “I asked if there are any sexual fantasies you haven’t fulfilled, or sexual acts you enjoy that no one has explored with you yet.”“Well, I know for sure that I like everything you and your friends do to me. I figure out new things I enjoy when we hook up, but as far as fantasies go, I don’t take them seriously enough to commit them to memory,” I answered sincerely.Normally, I’d feel
XANDERHow long would it take for me to bleed out and die if I stabbed myself in the eye? I wondered. For the next couple of minutes that followed, I felt like I was constantly thinking of all the fastest ways to end my life so I didn’t have to tolerate this mind numbingly boring conversation between my father and his unwanted guests. The worst part of it all was that I couldn’t simply zone out of the conversation because I was required to be present enough to answer whatever questions were thrown my way. It was either I engaged in the conversation as little as I could or I risked incurring my father’s wrath once they left the dinner table. And trust me, a boring conversation that made me want to take my life was much better than being on the receiving end of my supposedly calm father’s wrath. “You’re a business major, right? I’ve heard wonderful things about the business program in Enigma college, it’s by far the best in the country,” Luna Mendel was speaking to me and I was tryi
XANDER I nearly threw my monitor across the room as the pictures flooded in. My Private Investigator, Shane, was doing his job a little too well, uncovering things that left me wishing for death with how furious and jealous they made me. The last few days, he has only been able to send me pictures of April going about her normal activities, from being an insufferable nerd in the library, her silly volunteering gigs, and her stuck up student board meetings. After getting boring pictures for a couple of days, I assumed that her and Nick’s closeness was in the dumps after that little stunt of mine, but judging from the pictures now displayed on my system, they were back and closer than ever. The first one was of them in his car that was parked in a deserted street corner, kissing like they were each other’s better half. There’s something about it that seemed different and unsettling, and I hated it. The pictures that followed were of them holding hands and walking into his house lik
APRIL When I woke up the next morning, I was surprised to find myself in bed because I recalled us falling asleep on the living room couch. It was sweet of him to have carried me into the room so gently that he didn’t disturb my sleep. “Nick?” I called out softly as I yawned, only to look around and see that he wasn’t in bed but there was a surprise waiting for me where he should’ve been. In his place, there was a tray of delicious smelling breakfast on a tray. It was stacked with chocolate pancakes, sausages, scrambled eggs, strawberries, and a jug of coffee. I sat up in bed, my eyes watering up again at the sweet gesture. No one had ever been this intentional and kind to me, I wasn’t sure how to react to being treated with so much care and adoration. If he was any sweeter to me, I’d probably become diabetic at this point. “Hey, sweetheart, you're up,” Nick walked into the room with two mugs, smiling at me like I was the most pleasing sight in existence. “Thank you so much for
APRIL Everything still felt like a dream. From Nick’s confession, to how he’d reassured me, and then the way he’d swept me off my feet with that heart melting kiss we shared. All of it felt too good to be real, so much that I’d kept pinching myself secretly while we headed to his apartment, and since none of the punches made me jump from sleep, I had to accept that it was all real.When we finally arrived at his house, he suggested cooking me a meal and I insisted on helping. After refusing my help a few times, I kept badgering him until he finally gave in and accepted it. He had a recipe book that was his mom’s and he said that he’d memorized all the recipes since he was a teenager but he liked having it nearby while he cooked because it just made him feel closer to her. I found that heartwarming and adorable and it somehow made the process of cooking more enjoyable. We laughed heartily, fed each other tasting samples, talked about our food fails over the years and even danced to
APRIL I was completely floored by his confession. While I’d boldly pointed out that he didn’t like me, I wasn’t expecting him to counter it by confessing that he did. I’d just thought he would apologize for how he reacted when Xander threw the question at him and nothing more. From the way he’s been treating me of late, I guessed that he liked me better than his other friends, but I hadn’t expected him to confess to it this way. I felt so flustered by his words that I decided to wave it off as a joke instead of responding in an emotional way. “Of course you like every bit of me, I’m adorable,” I wiggled my brows and chuckled lightly, hoping to steer him off the topic that way. “That’s right. But I hope you know I’m serious as a heartbeat about my feelings for you. It’s way too stressful to remain in denial about them, especially when they seem to multiply by the day and you’re on my mind every second of the day,” he went into a more in-depth confession that completely swept me of
APRILI’ve never wanted the ground to open up and swallow me whole as I did right now. It felt like the gods would jump down from the clouds and strike me dead if I dared to reject Brooke’s pleas to join her for lunch, because I was clearly the cause of her distress. But the guilt, shame and discomfort I felt from being around her was the worst kind of torture, that’s why I kept wishing for a quick end to my life whenever she was near. Brooke was such a sweetheart and I felt horrible that I was one of the major causes of her heart ache. If I could end what I had with Ace easily, I would’ve done so since the first night I saw her crying after their argument, but knowing him, he’d have my secrets circling the entire school the second I tried to back out of the contract and I couldn’t afford to have that happen. When she asked me if I knew anything about the volunteer she’d seen him leave with on that night, I nearly shriveled up on the spot with the shock that slammed into me. I kne
BROOKEMy life was worse than hell, all the seven circles combined couldn’t compare to how horrible it was. And Ace was the bastard repeatedly lighting the match. A perfect example was last night when he showed up to a family dinner reeking of sex. He clearly smelt like another female and there’s no one at the table who didn’t pick up on it. Everyone acted like they were ignoring it, but from the subtle disgusted glares my mother kept shooting my way when no one was looking, I knew she would rain hell on me once we got home. I’d thought Ace was sensible enough to act better around our families, but he clearly didn’t have a shred of respect for anyone on the face of the earth. He could’ve saved me so much trouble by simply cleaning up better before dinner, but he’d much rather be an insufferable asshole by not doing so. After dinner, my mother rained me with derogatory comments and insults as usual before sending me into a den for another group of wrinkled old Alphas to do with me
XANDER The way her eyes narrowed into slits told me that she was about to protest, and I weirdly found her stubbornness attractive for some reason. Maybe I needed professional help at this point. “Let me fucking go. I mea—”On instinct, I used her wrist to pull her into my arms and crashed my lips against hers to shut her up. She used her free hand to push my chest, but I didn’t let her go, I just pressed my lips harder against hers, swiping my tongue out every few seconds to seek entrance. April groaned against my lips, now fisting a portion of my shirt and pulling on it to get me away from her, but I still didn’t budge. I couldn’t bring myself to stop kissing her even though I knew that I should before her protests worsened. When her stubborn refusal got a tad annoying, I grabbed both of her wrists in one of mine and pinned them behind her back, before wrapping my other palm around the base of her neck to keep our lip’s connected because I couldn’t bear for them to be apart. M
XANDERAs soon as we were done wrecking April’s tight holes, Ace had to leave for a dinner date with his family and Brooke’s. April washed up and changed into my clothes a while ago, and now she was scrolling through channel after channel on the TV while barely paying any attention to me. That allowed me to watch her to heart’s content, and it was so enjoyable because I realized sometime ago that I really liked seeing her in my clothes. The way my basketball jersey fit loosely around her slender frame, the enticing way that her perky boobs lifted the front of the jersey, how her small adorable feet stuck out of my joggers as she swung them absentmindedly, and the knowledge that she smelt like me whenever she had my clothes on. All of that flooded me with a level of satisfaction that should be Illegal. The most disturbing part of it was that this wasn’t the first time, I’d realized how much I enjoyed watching her move around in my clothes a while back, and I’d been ignoring it, but