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Chapter 73
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Only Regrets Chapter 74
“Aiden, you have sleeping pills? Please give me a pill,” I demand, choking with emotions.“Wait,” he says, his hands reaching out for pills in the drawer next to bed. I swallow a sleeping pill with the help of a glass of water, and lay down again in the bed. Soon, I drift into a deep slumber, escaping myself from the pain, anger, and conflicting emotions for a while. As soon as I wake up from the slumber, I hear abrupt noises coming from the outside, and I feel a damp cloth placed on my forehead. I remove it and manage to stand up from the bed. And then, I step outside the room, taking slow uneasy steps. Fever has still not subsided, making my body still shiver and ache. Walking further in, I see Aiden emptying alcohol bottles in the sink, and his dustbin has filled with cigarette packets. Is he throwing all these?“Why are you throwing it?” I ask, furrowing my brows.“I don't need these things anymore,” he announces. What! Aiden Allen is saying he doesn't need alcohol and cigaret
Only Regrets Chapter 75
In the morning, when I wake up, my head feels heavy. I feel miserable, my body burning with high fever, and my head throbbing painfully. I can hardly keep my eyes open. Standing up from the bed, I run inside the washroom as my stomach churns, the discomfort is unbearable. I can't hold back, and soon throw up in the washbasin. As I see my reflection in the mirror, my heart sinks down. This is not me. I used to look pretty even after waking up. But today, my eyes are red and swollen, and my face has turned dark, losing its usual glow. Tears well up in my eyes witnessing my miserable condition. Suddenly, my nose begins to bleed, and I collapse on my knees, losing all my strength to stand still.I don't have any strength left in my body. I don't know if I'll live or die soon. I grasp the washbasin, and manage to stand up somehow. After washing my nose and my mouth, I again walk inside the room and lay down in the bed, hugging myself tightly, not wanting to do anything. The discomfort i
Only Regrets Chapter 76
It's been three days since I caught this fever. Neither fever is subsiding nor my pain. Instead it's still rising followed by my body ache and headaches. I have severe joint pain, and muscle pain. I'm vomiting often, my nose is bleeding, and now I'm not even eating the four-five bites I used to eat before. I am even unable to stand up and go to the washroom by myself. I'm just crawling like a child. “Belle, there's something I've been meaning to tell you. It's pretty exciting,” Aiden says, all of sudden entering the room.I'm holding back my tears. I'm missing Ethan badly. I don't want to hear about anything else other than Ethan. I'm wondering if he's okay or not. "I just got the confirmation today – I'm going to debut with my first song! Soon I'll record the song,” Aiden says, his lips curling into a wide grin. “This journey is as much yours as it's mine.”“How’s this my journey?” I murmur slowly. “Now that you are my girlfriend,” he begins to say, taking a seat beside me. “My jo
Only Regrets Chapter 77
As Aiden pulls away from the hug and wipes his tears from his face. I slip out the diamond ring from my finger that he gave me, and place it in his palm, holding on his wrist. “I can't keep it anymore. It doesn't belong to me,” I say, looking into his eyes. “I bought it for you. It belongs to you,” he says as he grabs my hand, and slips the ring again in my finger. “You are the owner now. I don't want it back.” But, I don't want to keep it. And then, before I can protest against him, his apartment's door bell rings. “Let me check who's that?” he says, rising up from the bed; and he emerges outside the room, leaving me alone there. Suddenly, I hear abrupt noises outside the room. The fight, the punches, and the growls. “Where's Belle? I need to see if she's safe or not?” A loud voice echoes in the place. “Get out of here. She's safe,” Aiden's voice catches my attention. He's shouting at someone, but whom? “I will not go anywhere till I have a talk with her. I don't believe sh
Only Regrets Chapter 78
I have let go of Aiden, my ex boyfriend. But what about this guy now? Ethan. He loves me madly; and seeing my condition I can tell I am sick of more than just fever. He can't even tolerate a single scratch on my body. How will he endure all these things when he gets to know about my abdominal pain, and nose bleeds? Considering that, I don't want him to stay next to me. In view of the fact that I'm terribly sick, he won't leave me alone. Moreover, he himself will get tensed and worried about me. “Ethan…let me go now. I want to go back to the dorm,” I demand. “You're not going anywhere else other than hospital now,” he announces, continuing walking further. He swings the Lamborghini's door upwards and stubbornly settles me on the seat. My muscles tense as the leather of the seat touches my back. Before he can lean back and shut the Lamborghini's door, I pull him towards me, grabbing his shirt’s collar. “Please. You know I don't like hospitals. I don't want to go there,” I beg him.
Only Regrets Chapter 79
Inasmuch as I slowly open my eyes feeling the same ache of pain throughout my body, I realize I am laying on a bed in a hospital room. The walls are a sterile white, and the faint hum of the medical equipment fills the air. Turning my head slightly, I see Ethan sitting on the chair beside me, holding my hand gently, his warmth comforting me. I notice a thin tube attached to the veins on the back of my hand, delivering glucose in my system.“Ethan,” I whisper, my voice barely audible. He looks at me and his lips curl into a smile. “You're awake,” he murmurs softly, squeezing my hand gently. “You’re really sick. The doctors think it might be dengue, but we're still waiting for blood results.”I feel gratitude and emotion wash over me. Despite the pain, having Ethan beside me makes me feel better. “Thank you,” I murmur, tightening my grip on his hand. “But you should go now. I'll take care of myself.”I don't want to trouble him. I know he's worried about me; but still, the lover girl
Only Regrets Chapter 80
Ethan's jaw tightens and he clenches his fists tightly, glaring at Aiden. I brush my thumb on the back of his hand, trying to soothe him and reassure him. He averts his gaze back to me, his face tensed and concerned. I glance up to Aiden. “Why are you here? I didn't ask you to come,” I say, locking my eyes with Aiden's eyes. “I was worried about you. I wanted to see you,” he answers. “What did you want to see? That she has died or not after being tortured by you?” Ethan snaps back. This guy! What do I do with him? Why does he like mocking him all the time?“I wanted to see if she's all okay or not,” Aiden growls, looking into Ethan's eyes. “I will stay with Belle.”“Don't need to do anything for her. You can go,” Ethan barks. “Ethan…go and eat something. I'm all okay,” I demand. “No. I don't trust you can be all okay in his presence,” he says, fuming with rage. “Please, I don't want you to end up fainting. You're diabetic patient,” I beg, looking into his eyes. “Please, just go
Only Regrets Chapter 81
Suddenly, I feel a sharp cramp in my stomach. Already dealing with high fever, abdominal pain, muscle and joint pain, now I feel uneasy about the added discomfort. It might be my menstrual cramps. I check and my suspicion confirms. I'm wanting to curse god at this moment. I can't tolerate anything anymore. Why this now? I don't even have pads. I feel anxious and uncomfortable at this moment. Reaching out for Ethan's phone, I search for Alex’s number and call him as Ethan told me to do. I don't have anyone who I can lean on for help other than Ethan. Neither my best friend Emily nor my boyfriend Aiden. The only two persons I believed most—have hurt me in the worst way possible. Though, I never asked Aiden to help me. I never told him about my periods. Were we truly boyfriend-girlfriend? There wasn't anything like a relationship between us. I think I never considered him as my boyfriend. What I felt for him was just friendship—not love, I guess. I mistook my feelings for him. “Belle
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Only Regrets Epilogue 2
The next day, overwhelmed by the realization that the boy from Corsica is actually Ethan, I decide to leave Sofia. I head to Corsica, hoping to relive the feelings and memories from my childhood, to see if they can help me understand the emotions that have been haunting me.The waves gently lap at the shore as I sit alone on the familiar sand of Ajaccio Beach, the place where our story began. The sun is setting, casting the sky in a warm, orange glow, but all I can feel is the cold emptiness in my heart, all I feel is the heavy weight of unanswered questions pressing down on me.I close my eyes, and in my mind, I can see Ethan sitting beside me, just like we used to. I lean my head on his shoulder, feeling the familiar comfort of his presence, even if it’s only in my imagination.“Why, Ethan?” I whisper, my voice trembling with the ache in my heart. “Why did you leave me waiting all these years? Why didn’t you come back for me?”Tears spill over, sliding down my cheeks as I continue,
Only Regrets Epilogue 1
I fold the letter and slip it into an envelope, carefully writing ‘A Letter I'll Never Give to Ethan’ on the front. I place the envelope in the book Beauty and the Beast, alongside the first rose Ethan gave me, the one I have pressed between the pages. With a deep sigh, I shut the book, trying to push away the lingering sadness.Just then, my phone rings. I answer, and my heart skips a beat when I hear it's a modeling contract offer.“Hello, Belle?” a voice on the other end says. “We’re thrilled to inform you that your first major modeling contract has been finalized. You’ll be featured on a billboard in Paris.”My eyes widen in disbelief. Paris—the city where fashion dreams come true—is where my face will be showcased. The excitement and pride swell inside me as I thank the caller and hang up, my mind racing with the reality of this incredible milestone.As soon as I hang up, tears well up in my eyes. This is my first major contract, a clear sign that my hard work is paying off. Over
Only Regrets Chapter 102
Ethan looks more grown-up now. If I'm twenty, he might be twenty one, I guess. He looks more like a man than the teenage boy I remember. He still has that same cold, intense look in his dark brown eyes and his jaw remains tight, just like before. But now, these expressions are framed by a more mature face. Seeing Ethan taking slow, deliberate steps toward me, my heart begins to pound so hard that I can hear it echoing in my ears. Everything around us fades away, leaving just the two of us, lost in each other’s gaze. I can’t move, can’t think—only feel the magnetic pull between us growing stronger with each step he takes. “Are you really here?” I whisper, as he finally reaches me, my voice trembling with disbelief.“Yes, I’m here,” he replies softly, his eyes shimmering with tears.Tears brim in my eyes as I lock my eyes with his. “I don't believe it,” I mumble. Seeing him here now feels like a dream I don’t want to wake up from. “I'm imagining you.”It has been two years since we sa
Only Regrets Chapter 101
It has been two years since I left New York City and Ethan behind. Now, at twenty, my life has changed dramatically. I’m thriving as a model, spending long days and nights on my modeling career. Photoshoots, fashion shows, and casting calls fill my calendar, leaving little room for anything else. When I'm not modeling, I'm handling my father's hotels and resorts businesses, trying to prove myself in a world that demands so much. It feels amazing, earning money by myself at this young age. In the whirlwind of responsibilities and ambitions, I've almost forgotten about love. Due to my busy schedule, I've completely let go of the idea of relationships and dating now. Two years have passed, and my shoulder-length hair—that had once been trimmed by Aiden—now falls comfortably to my mid-back. While it’s not as long as it was before, it has grown out beautifully, mirroring the changes and growth in my own life.I had been taking my medications and therapy sessions for schizophrenia as well,
Only Regrets Chapter 100
The journey back to Sofia feels like a blur. I sit in the private jet with my father, staring out the window but seeing nothing. My mind is consumed with thoughts of Ethan, the pain of our separation pricking my heart. Once we land, I retreat into the familiarity of our mansion, but it offers no comfort. Days turn into weeks, and weeks into months, yet the ache remains. I isolate myself, shutting out the world and everyone in it. My parents are frustrated with my demeanor, especially my mother, who doesn’t understand why I’ve stopped caring about everything I once loved.In the solitude of my room, time seems to stretch endlessly. I spend hours staring out the window, feeling no shift in my own heart. The walls of my room, once comforting, now feel like a cage. Every object, every corner, reminds me of Ethan, of what we had, and what I’ve lost. And Ethan's hallucinations make it even harder to forget about him. “Belle, you need to get out of this house,” my mother snaps one day from
Only Regrets Chapter 99
As graduation day approaches, the excitement that usually accompanies the end of high school is overshadowed by a deep sense of melancholy. I’ve spent the past few days packing up my belongings, preparing to leave the dorm that has been my home for these formative years. Every item I pack feels like a piece of my past being sealed away, and the act of boxing up my life brings an unexpected weight to my chest.The day arrives with its usual pomp and ceremony. The campus is filled with graduates in their caps and gowns, the air buzzing with a mix of excitement and nostalgia. The graduation ceremony itself is a blur of speeches and applause. I’m called up to receive my diploma, a moment that should have been filled with pride and joy. Instead, it’s tinged with sadness, as I feel the weight of everything that has happened. The graduation ceremony is also the final chance to see everyone before we all go our separate ways. Friends and acquaintances gather for one last hurrah. The atmosphe
Only Regrets Chapter 98
I push open the heavy wooden doors of the church, the familiar creak echoing softly through the quiet space. I walk down the aisle, my footsteps muted by the worn carpet, and make my way to my usual spot—a solitary pew in the corner.The church is dimly lit, shimmering with a soft glow from the candles flickering by the altar. I sit down, feeling the weight of my heart pressing heavily on my chest. I bow my head, folding my hands in my lap, and let out a shuddering breath."God, it’s me again," I whisper, my voice trembling with emotion. "I’m not sure how to start this conversation. I don’t even know where to begin."I close my eyes, trying to steady my racing thoughts. Ethan’s face flashes in my mind, and my tears begin to fall, tracing hot lines down my cheeks."I don’t understand why things had to end this way. I wanted so much more. I thought we had a chance, a real chance to be happy together."I take a deep breath, trying to calm the storm inside me."He said he loved me, but I
Only Regrets Chapter 97
Ethan comes running behind me, asking me to stop for a second. As I keep on walking on the road, my vision blurs by the car headlights. I'm too lost in my thoughts to notice the car speeding towards me. Suddenly, I feel a strong hand grab my arm, pulling me back just in time."Belle, what the hell are you doing?" Ethan yells, his voice filled with panic and anger.I can hardly breathe, my heart pounding from the close call. I look up at him, and his eyes are filled with a mixture of relief and fury. My mind feels like it’s spinning, and I can’t tell what’s real or just a trick of my mind. Everything around me seems to blur, and I feel disconnected from my own thoughts. It’s like I’m trapped in a fog, struggling to understand what’s happening.I'm just done with my life. The schizophrenia makes it hard to define for me what's real or what's hallucination. I've literally gone mad. It would be better if I would have bumped into that car. Why did he pull me back?“Why the hell are you he
Only Regrets Chapter 96
As he kisses and touches me, his hands roam possessively over my body. I gasp, feeling overwhelmed and exposed.“Ethan, it's enough,” I whisper against his lips.“No, it's not. I want more of you, sweetheart,” he whispers, his voice raw with desire. "What if someone enters and sees me like this?" I ask, my voice trembling with a mix of fear and desire. “I don't want anyone else seeing me in this semi nude form.”“You’re mine, Belle,” he murmurs, his voice low and possessive. “Every part of you is mine, and only mine. If anyone else dares to see what’s meant for me alone, I’ll make sure they regret it.”He looks at me with a fierce, possessive glare. "If anyone dares to see you like this," he growls, his voice dripping with intensity, "I'II make that person blind. No one can dare to take a glimpse of your naked form until I'm breathing. No one means no one.”Hearing Ethan's words, my heart pounds in my chest. The intensity in his voice, the fierce protectiveness in his eyes—it sends a
