6

6

EMILY’S POV.

I got home close to noon, and trudged in, feeling shitty. All through the drive home, I had hated myself. It felt like I was on the same level as John, and that I was also a cheat.

If he knew about it, he’d be mad. He’d want to continue with the engagement on the ground that we were even.

He could mock me for being all dramatic when I had been the same. Maybe he’d even suggest I’d been doing it behind his back for a long time.

“Wel…” Dahlia was saying, but noticed the depressed look on my face. “Emily, is anything wrong?” She asked, coming towards me, and as she held my arms, my eyes brimmed with tears.

I didn’t even know what I was crying for anymore. Was it for sleeping with a stranger, or realizing I was heartbroken?

“Emily.” She called, worriedly, then led me to the sofa gently, where we sat, and I sniffed.

“John’s cheating on me.” I said, and her eyes widened, as her jaw dropped.

“John’s what? I mean…”

“After everything I did for him, he… he was making love to another woman in his room. He… he didn’t even think of the fact that I’ve loved him with my all, and tried to provide everything I could. I don’t accept his money simply because he’s rich,

“I’m… I’m bent on being an international fashion designer with my own strength, and he knows that. Isn’t that a good quality? It shows that I do not depend on his money. That lady he was sleeping with is definitely after his money. There’s no two ways about it. So, why… why? Maybe I’m not enough, or there’s something…”

“Don’t ever think you’re not enough. You’re more than enough. John is being greedy. Men are that way sometimes. They just have to have everything. You shouldn’t blame yourself for their lack of self control.” She said, and my tears began to fall in quick drops, onto my hands, which were entangled on my lap.

“Since when could he have been cheating on me? Since when had he seen me as a fool? Since…”

“No, no… you shouldn’t think of that. You should know that will only hurt you more. We can’t be sure of when he started doing that, if he started doing that, or if it just happened once, so don’t hurt yourself by trying to determine by yourself. Our minds are not always right. We always find explanations to suit ourselves, and those explanations are not always right.” She said, tucking my hair behind my ear, and wiping my tear-stained face.

“Maybe.” I intoned.

“So what do you want to do next?” She asked.

“Break up with him. I’m breaking the engagement and canceling the wedding. I know I’ve been waiting for this for months, and have made huge preparations, but if John’s cheating, and we’re not even married, there’s no saying he wouldn’t cheat when we’re eventually married.

“Actually, there’s no two ways about it. I’m very sure of it. He will still cheat when we get married. I can’t keep on hurting myself, so I think the best thing is to break up the engagement.” I said, getting to my feet.

Dahlia smiled at me, and gave me a comforting hug, which I wanted to sink into.

After that, I went to take my bath, while she prepared breakfast for me. I had no appetite, but was going to eat. John wasn’t worth me losing my appetite. Losing it for him would be pathetic.

After a long bath, I brushed my hair, and dried it, before selecting a pair of boyfriend jeans, and a pleated pink cropped top. I didn’t want to look in the least affected.

I grabbed my purse, and left my room.

Dahlia had prepared meat broth, rice, and steamed vegetables, and honestly, it was probably the best thing I could have at the moment.

I chewed on the tender beef in the broth, and munched on the vegetables.

I ate violently, as if John were the one I was eating up.

After having brunch that was meant to be breakfast, Dahlia checked to see if everything about me was fine.

“Okay, dear. Make sure you are calm, and that you return safely. We don’t know if John gets violent when provoked because you’ve never provoked him, so be careful, okay?” She said, and I nodded, gave her a brief hug, then left the house.

I took a cab, and began my journey to John’s house, and it seemed like the heavens were giving me signs not to go. The traffic was hot, and thick. It had me wondering if an accident or some sort had happened.

Also, it gave me the chance to go back in time. Right in my head, I went back to the spring day when John had brought up the idea of us getting married for the first time.

We had gone for a picnic to watch the beautiful cherry trees, and had sat on the green grass, which was blanketed with a soft pink fabric I had picked out.

“Today is beautiful.” He had said.

“Yeah, there’s no sun, yet the sky’s clear, and the trees…”

“No. Today’s beautiful because you’re here with me. If I were the only watching this, it wouldn’t look special, but because you’re here talking to me, laughing, and letting me stare at you, it feels like the best thing ever.” He had said, and my face had turned into a deep shade of pink.

“That’s lovely of you to say.”

“Last night, I wondered how it would feel when we eventually had to break up, and it felt like I was stabbed. Then I realized… I don’t have to break up with you. We don’t have to ever break up. I mean, beautiful days like this don’t have to end. Do you… do you think we should get married. I don’t want to ever lose you. I love you, Emily. And I… gosh, a ring! I forgot a ring!” He had shouted, and I had burst into laughter.

“You don’t need a ring, John!” I shouted, trying to stop him from going into mock mental breakdown.

Then I had cut off a strand of grass, made it into a ring, and had presented it to him.

“Here. Put this on my finger.”

“Emily!” He had groaned, and had fallen to the grass.

That day, my heart had seemed to grow flowers that bloomed every time I stared at John.

He was perfect in every sense, and loved me with everything he had. Where else was I to find someone like him?

He was sweet, cared for me and was the shy one between us many a time. It was strange to think that that John had let another lady atop him. It was very strange. The more I thought of it, the more I felt insane. Maybe I had seen things. Maybe…

I sighed, and looked out at the cars, and car owners, who looked to be on the verge of blowing up.

The traffic seemed like it wasn’t moving, and it was suffocating. Funny enough, I ordered a mini-fan online, and got it still in the traffic. It lasted hours, with slow movement, and by the time

I got to John’s house, the sun was going down.

I knocked on his door and waited. I could have easily put in the passcode, and walked in, but I needed to establish the fact that we were going to become complete strangers after the episode that was about to happen.

John opened the door after my second knock.

“Emily.” He called, looking like he had a sleepless night, and a stressful day.

I walked in, and was about walking to the dining to sit, as it was my favorite spot in his house, but stopped at the stairs. I was no longer his. So, his things were no longer mine.

I ought to act like a stranger. I moved backwards till I was standing next to a large, carefully sculpted image of an Alpha Wolf.

It was what John had called his family heirloom, which had been passed down for years. According to him. This was the third, and was imbued with mystical protecting powers. The first and second had been broken, and the ones who had broken them had been punished. The third, which I was standing next to, had lived for hundred of years.

“Emily, please come. Sit, and let’s talk.” He said, in a pleading tone, but I stayed rooted to the spot I was, until he came to stand in front of me. “Emily. About last night….”

“John, I came here to say something. There’s something I need to tell you before…” I was saying flatly, but he held my hand.

“Hear me out, hm? Hear me out, first. I also have things to say. I need to explain. The way things are, I do not like it. You seem so scary and unlike the lady I know. I just…”

“Exactly what I was thinking, John. You don’t look anything like the man I used to know.”

“Emily, it was a mistake. Mistakes like that never repeat themselves.”

“Never? They never repeat themselves?” I asked, with a scoff.

“Yes, Emily. You have to believe me. I just… Last night, she was heartbroken and…”

“And you slept with her because sleeping with her would heal her broken heart?”

“No. I’m… I’m the cause of her heartbreak. You… you see… she’s had feelings for me for a long time…”

“And sleeping with her will let those feelings go away?” I cut in.

“Emily, stop acting tight. This is a mistake every man makes once in his life.”

“Please don’t say that.” I said, in a voice close to a whisper.

“Why shouldn’t I say that? It’s the truth. No matter what, I am a man before I am your fiancé.”

“Then I think I want to search for the man who puts being my fiance first, and tries to shove the dirty man in him backwards. So, you’re trying to tell me. ‘Emily, every man has cheated once, so let this go.’? You think it’s that easy? If it’s that easy, why don’t you let me bring a man in, and sleep with him right in front of you?”

“Emily!” He cautioned.

“Let me do it! Then we’re even.”

“That’s never going to happen. You’re going overboard, Emily.”

“Why? Why can’t it happen? It’s not a mistake every female makes once in her life?”

“Emily, it was a mistake. You don’t have to act this way. It was just a little, tiny mistake that…”

I lost my temper, and my voice rose to a loud, booming tone.

“That little tiny mistake broke my heart! That little tiny mistake broke our trust, it smashed our love, it tainted the good memories we shared. It turned you into the man I hate, it made me into a pathetic fool. It makes my heart hurt every damn second. Damn you, John! I hate you! I’ve never ever wanted a man like you, and I will never want one like you!

“You’re a stupid ingrate who doesn’t know when a woman is trying her all just to satisfy him. You’re a fool who took me for granted, and expects me not to react!” I spat, trying hard to hurt him with my words.

“Emily, I’m sorry!”

“Sorry does not cut it! Sorry will never help it. You’re a cheat. A man that’s not even worth half of me. I can’t believe I wasted my time on you, John. If one woman is enough to sway you, then what will you do about the tons of women who’ll be so close to you when we move to the family house?

“You’re just a dirty dog, John. Let it sink. As of today, you and I… we’re no longer engaged.” I spat, and wrenched his ring off my finger, throwing it to the ground, letting it bounce, and make clanging sounds, as it did.

John’s face was pure shock.

I did it… yeah, I said it.