ElizabethAfter our conversation in the bar, I do my best to put the events of the past few weeks behind me and concentrate on my career.I tell Titus and Mack that I’m going to England, and Titus calls Alan and lets him know. Everyone at Acheron Pharmaceuticals is overjoyed, and I have several long phone calls with people talking about practical details like where I’m going to live and what office I’ll use.I don’t see much of Huxley. For the first time in years, I don’t hear from him for three days—no calls or messages. I don’t speak to him at all until I turn up at the club for our usual Friday meeting. When I walk into the boardroom, he greets me with a smile. He’s polite and funny, like he always is, bustling around making sure we have coffees and food. But he avoids my eyes, and when the meeting is over, he’s out of the door first, saying he has things to do.I’m sure Mack has picked up on the mood, and I half expect him to wait behind to admonish me. But he doesn’t. He gathers u
HuxleyThe next two weeks pass swiftly. I’m busy at work, and I throw myself into the rest of the refurbishments, getting under Victoria’s feet until she yells at me to go home for Christ’s sake and give her some space. At the weekends, I have Joanna, and that passes a few pleasant hours. I take her to the zoo and the aquarium, and we also have a movie night, and watch TV while we’re in our pajamas, eating popcorn.When I do get some spare time, I do what I can to help Mack and Sidnie plan for their wedding. They want to keep it relatively simple, and Cameron Brown, who owns the yacht they’re hiring, is happy to organize the food and entertainment. But there are other bits and pieces that need arranging, and I call on some of my contacts to help Mack get what he wants, as it’s at relatively short notice.The invitations go out, and they state they want the wedding to be smart casual, so I’m not going to have to worry about wearing a tux. Instead, Mack and I choose a cream linen suit f
The beautiful autumn day feels more like late summer, and the breeze that blows across us is warm and pleasant. Sidnie looks absolutely stunning today, full of joy and excitement at her upcoming wedding. Her blonde hair hangs around her head in crazy curls that bob in the breeze, and her eyes are bright and sparkling. She throws her arms around Mack, and they exchange a long kiss before breaking apart so he can greet her family.“Welcome,” I say when they’re all done. “Come with me and I’ll show you to your cabins, and then you can explore.”Mack’s put me in charge of cabin allocation. It took a surprising amount of time to organize. Couples are easy, but there are a lot of single people coming, and not everyone’s keen on sharing a cabin. I’m sharing with Titus, and Victoria’s sharing with my sister, Evie, as they’re good friends, but I’ve given Elizabeth her own cabin. I figured it’s the least I can do.The next hour is busy as everyone arrives. Even if Mack hadn’t asked me to be his
ElizabethThe first day on board the yacht passes smoothly. Around six, we gravitate indoors to the saloon for dinner, and I’m awed by the amazing buffet the crew have put on—platters filled with freshly caught fish and seafood, cured meats, and a variety of gorgeous salads, as both Mack and Sidnie are vegetarians.Afterward, we move back out onto the deck for more swimming, conversation, champagne drinking, and dancing, as the music is turned up, and the sun begins to sink behind the land to the west.Huxley’s avoiding me. It’s quite obvious to me, although I don’t know if anyone else has picked up on it. He’s not cold, exactly, and he includes me in the conversation, and is quick to get me another drink or anything else I might need. But our usual teasing camaraderie is gone, and he spends most of the time on the other side of the pool, or off mingling with the guests.I should have expected it, but it makes me sad. I can’t rant and rail at him though, because it’s all my fault. I s
I sleep well in the end, and wake up naturally just after six. I have a quick shower and dress, then head up to the saloon for breakfast around seven.We moored overnight at Urupukapuka, the largest island in the Bay of Islands, and we’ve not yet set sail for Paihia, where we’re picking up Mack’s family. Outside, the rich green bush that covers most of the island contrasts with the deep blue of the ocean and the cornflower-blue sky. It’s a beautiful morning, already hot and sunny, and the forecast is the same all day.I’m guessing a few people are nursing hangovers as most of the tables are empty. Mack and Sidnie are there. They aren’t bothering with the tradition of not seeing each other before the wedding and are happily tucking into a cooked breakfast at a table with Huxley and Victoria.I ask the chef for scrambled eggs to go with my bacon and toast, and take the plate over to join them, as it seems rude to sit at another table on my own.“Morning,” they all say as I take the rema
The yacht sets sail from Paihia, and begins its tour of the Bay of Islands, following which it will pass the Cavalli Islands and sail up to Doubtless Bay before looping back once again.The yacht is a lot busier now everyone’s on board. Sidnie is already locked away with her mother, sister, and best friends getting ready for her big moment. Huxley and Mack spend a couple of hours introducing people and playing hosts while stewards go around with drinks and canapés, and then around midday everyone starts disappearing for a short rest before they get ready for the wedding.As Sidnie’s getting ready in their cabin, Mack joins Huxley in his old cabin to change, leaving me alone in mine, at least for now. They wanted a relaxed wedding, and I thought I’d go for trousers as I didn’t want to spend the whole day trying to stop the sea breeze blowing up my skirt. I was going to pick something cream or maybe light blue to go with the ocean theme, but then my gaze fell on the outfit I ended up wit
HuxleyIt’s the first time I’ve been a best man. I’ve spent the past twenty-four hours making sure people are comfortable and happy, and it’s just felt like an extension of my day job, which comes so easily to me I’m convinced anyone could do it.But as I stand with Mack, and I watch him tremble as his bride-to-be approaches down the aisle, I suddenly feel the real reason I’m here. I’m the equivalent to Sidnie’s father for the groom. I’m a symbol of Mack’s past, and I’m giving him away to her, helping him pass from bachelorhood to the respectable role of husband and, God willing, father, in time.For so long we’ve all—me, Mack, Victoria, Titus, Elizabeth—lived without a thought for the future. Selfishly devoting our lives to work and fun, convinced we’d be young forever, and certain that we didn’t want the tie of a relationship, not wanting the complication, as Titus said. I wonder if he’s feeling what I am right now—that sudden shock like a bee sting inside me, as I watch Mack waiting
I can see Mack getting emotional as he watches us all perform, and feel a touch of pity for him as he doesn’t know what’s coming. Sure enough, as Koro calls to repeat the haka, “Tika tonu! Tika tonu!” and Sidnie adopts the wide eyes and trembling hand gestures of the women and calls back, “U-e!” Indeed! and begins performing the dance, Mack’s emotion spills over, and he has to stare hard at the ground, fighting for control. Emotional herself, Sidnie doesn’t stop but touches his arm, encouraging him, and after a few seconds he finally joins in too, copying our movements as he says the words. He locks eyes with me—he knows I set this up—and for a moment time slips away, and we could be any two guys in Maori history, doing their war dance. It’s a powerful performance, especially with everyone in their wedding finery, a celebration of their new life together, and I don’t think there’s a dry eye on the yacht by the time we’re done.The other guests cheer and give a huge round of applause,
June 21st (two months later)KipIt’s the winter solstice, exactly six months after I met Alice, and Mum and Dad’s house is full of people who’ve come to celebrate the renewal of Saxon and Catie’s vows and their baby-naming ceremony. Saxon sprung a wedding on her after Christmas while they were on holiday, because he wanted to marry her but knew she’d be overwhelmed by having to say her vows in front of lots of people. However, six months have gone by now, and she’s settled down a lot, to the extent that when he suggested they combine a naming ceremony with a vow renewal ceremony, she jumped at the idea.Dad’s twin brother, Brandon, and my aunt, Jenny, are chatting to Mum and Alice’s mum. Penny has been spending a lot of time with Mum, and I’m so pleased that they genuinely seem to get on well. Penny’s holding one of Catie’s twins and Mum’s holding the other, and the two of them are clearly enjoying themselves.Kennedy’s helping Catie get ready. Her husband, Jackson, with baby Eddie, i
He holds out a hand to me. “Let’s go outside.”Meekly, my head whirling, I let him pull me up and lead me out into the garden. It’s dark now, and a couple of moths are fluttering around the kitchen window, but there’s enough light for us to see each other clearly, and it’s not cold.Still standing, he turns me to face him. “What do you think?” he asks.“I don’t know what to say. I… I’m ashamed Mum feels that Charlie and I didn’t listen to her. She’s right of course. I was determined to make the sacrifice because I thought it was what I should do. But she is still my mother, and she deserves to have a say in it.”I look down at where he’s holding my hands. “But it’s not easy. It would be a huge change for her to move, and I know that change is one thing she really struggles with. When anything big happens, it always makes her unwell.”“That’s fair enough, but we’d make sure we did it in small steps so it didn’t become too overwhelming.” He lifts my hands and kisses my fingers. “Whateve
I glance at Charlie, a little ashamed. She looks back at me, her lips twisting.“I don’t think it occurred to either of you to ask me what I want,” Mum says. “And every time I tried to talk about it, you shut me down.”I stare at her, horrified. Is that true? I suppose it is. She did try to say she wanted to find a solution that would mean neither of us would have to give up the men in our lives, but we both steamrollered over her, insisting we weren’t going to cave.“When I talked to Kip, though,” Mum continues, “he said, ‘What do you want?’ I was so touched I nearly cried.”I glance at him, but he’s looking at her, his lips curving up behind his fingers.Mum looks at me. “As I said, I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. But I’m not going to let either of you pass up on the chance of happiness with the man of your dreams for me. Alice!” She snaps as I open my mouth. “Please!”I close my mouth again, shocked at her sharp tone.“I know that over the years you’ve had to step up an
AliceI’m absolutely shattered.Charlie’s revelation yesterday threw all three of us into a whirlwind of heightened emotions, and it’s been very difficult to stop them spinning us around.Mum went to bed early last night, exhausted from the whole thing, and the two of us stayed up until very late, checking on her from time to time, both frightened of leaving her alone.“We have to sort this,” Charlie told me at one point, long after the sun had set. “We can’t keep doing this to her.”“I know that,” I snapped. But I couldn’t see a way clear through the thick forest of our problems.In the end, both of us were so tired and irritable and upset that we decided to sleep on it and talk again the next day.I lay awake for about an hour, thinking about Kip, missing him, and feeling miserable, and fighting with myself because he’s my best friend, and I wanted to call him and talk it over with him, and I couldn’t. Eventually I crashed out, slept too long, and I’ve woken with a headache, grouchy
I sigh. “Shit.”“Yeah. She was so happy, and I just couldn’t bring myself to say it. I kept thinking about the baby, and I knew I had to try and make a go of my marriage for the baby’s sake. So I stayed. I told Renée I couldn’t see her again. She texted me occasionally, but we didn’t meet up. I tried, I really did. But Chloe had morning sickness for the first few months, and after that she just didn’t want sex—she said it felt weird while she was pregnant. And then the baby was born, and even a few months after, she still wasn’t interested. I tried to be understanding, and accept she was tired and probably sore, but… I know it makes me a terrible person, but I just kept thinking about how Renée wanted me, and how good she made me feel… And then one day she contacted me again and asked to see me. And I’m only human, Kip. I was lonely, and I know it sounds pathetic and childish and makes me an arsehole, but I was angry with Chloe for not wanting me, and for not taking my needs into acco
KipAfter my long phone call with Penny, I send a text to Sam, the pilot of the Knight Sky, then take my laptop out onto the deck and spend half an hour browsing and jotting down some notes until the doorbell goes. I answer it to find Craig standing there. To my relief, there’s no sign of Renée. I’m tempted to say, ‘So she let you out on your own, then?’ but I manage to restrain myself.“Jesus,” he says, staring at my eye, “what happened to you?”“Don’t ask,” I reply wryly. “Come in.” I stand back and let him pass, close the door, and follow him down the steps. “You want a coffee?”He shrugs. “Okay.”I take it as a sign that he’s planning to stay at least long enough to have a drink, and turn on the machine. “Thanks for coming,” I say as I start the espresso pouring. “I wasn’t sure you’d agree to it.” I glance at him. “Was Renée okay with you coming?” I’m genuinely curious, as I was convinced she’d arrive with him.He sits on one of the barstools and scratches at a mark on the counter.
He puts his arm around her. “It’s amazing,” he says softly. “Thank you.” The last ounce of resentment has vanished from his eyes.“They’re lovely gifts,” Mum tells me. “Well done.”One of the babies—Liam, I think, because he’s wearing red—stirs in the cot, waving his tiny fists in the air.“Can I pick him up?” I ask, and Catie wipes her eyes and nods..“Of course.”I lift the baby out and walk beneath the umbrella so he doesn’t have the sun in his eyes.“Hey, little fella,” I murmur, and he looks up at me with his big blue eyes. He smells sweet, of milk and talcum powder, and when I stroke his cheek with a finger, he grabs it and tries to suck it. I chuckle and look at Saxon, who’s watching me with a smile.I feel a huge swell of relief. It’s the first step to putting things right with the people I love, and it feels damn good.I just hope I can do something similar with Craig and Alice.*I stay for another hour, drinking my coffee and chatting to my family. Then, just before midday,
KipI read it several times, then send it.It’s time to head over to my parents’ house. Dad bought each of us a breathalyzer when we were younger so we could make sure we weren’t over the limit after a few drinks. I haven’t used it for a while as I don’t tend to drink at all when I’m driving, but I take it out of the cupboard and blow into it, relieved to find I’m well under.Taking the presents with me, I get into the Merc and head out into the sunny morning.When I pull up at the house, Saxon’s Aston is already there, gleaming in the sunshine. I pick up the parcels and make my way inside, my stomach fluttering. It’s been a long time since I’ve had the need to apologize for bad behavior.As I pass the kitchen I see Mum there, talking to Pamela as they load a tray with cups of coffee. They both look over as I stop and walk in. Pamela gives a wry smile, and Mum gives me a look that says, ‘What am I going to do with you?’“Morning,” I say, going up to Mum, leaving the parcels on the cou
KipI vomit twice more in the night, but luckily Damon’s there to help me stumble to the bathroom, and to encourage me to drink more water. So when I eventually wake up for real, I feel a tad fragile, but not half as bad as I might have done if he hadn’t been there.I check the time—07:14. The sun is up, flooding the room with pale yellow light. The sky is such a light blue that it’s almost white.The bed next to me is empty, and I can’t hear Damon upstairs.Still no message or calls from Alice, but there are a few others waiting for me. The first is from Damon.Hey bro, I left around two a.m. once you stopped throwing up. Take the Panadol and drink the orange juice, then go apologize to Saxon and Catie and I’m sure you’ll feel better. DThe second is from my father.I’d like to see you here at eleven a.m., kiddo. Make sure you’re not over the limit. Dad xHe hasn’t called me kiddo for years. It’s obviously a reflection of my behavior last night.The third and fourth are from Saxon. The