chapter 7

Willow

I’m a bundle of nerves once Ash and the other guys leave. Did I really agree to go on a date of sorts with a total stranger? Why on earth would I do that? What am I thinking? I know it’s been a while since…him but the emotional wounds still feel too fresh. What if I’m making another mistake by trusting he will be different?

The best idea is probably to cancel this thing all together, but I’m hesitating. This is so dumb! He asked me to show him around, and I automatically assumed it was a date. It’s not a date, not at all. So, there is no reason to be nervous or scared. This is completely platonic.

With that idea in mind, I can let all that building anxiety go and pick out something comfortable to wear. Since it’s not a date I don’t have to dress up, so I glance through the sparce choices in my closet and pick a simple white babydoll shirt with spaghetti straps with a tiny flower design on it. I also choose a pair of jean shorts and my white tennis shoes to go along with it.

Before I get dressed, I decide to jump in the shower. When I get out, I decide to leave my naturally curly hair in place. Most of the time, I straighten it because I was so worried about being found, but maybe it’s time to let myself relax just a little. So, feeling brave, I thread some product through my curly hair and make a small braid crown to hold it all in place. I quickly get dressed and do my basic make-up routine of liquid liner, mascara, and blush.

I don’t use foundation anymore. My ex wanted me to always look put together, including a face full of make-up, but I always loved the random freckles I had. So, once I was free, I didn’t bother with all that make-up and decided to keep it light. I slowly started to feel like myself again. The fear of him finding me is the only thing holding me back from completely moving on, but small wins like my appearance seemed so huge.

Once I’m all done, I look at myself in the mirror a little longer. Memories of bruises and tears flash in my mind, but I try to push those away and focus on me now. I look healthier but sad. When will I smile again, and it be real? My story of my fiancé passing away has explained why I look sad so much, but that is just a story.

I check my phone and see that it’s almost time for me to meet Ash. My shoes are next to the door, so I quickly pull them on and grab my purse. I make sure to lock the three different deadbolts I have on my door and the main lock before I head out. When I ran from my ex, I had a good amount of money saved up in an account he had no idea about, and when I came here, I was able to rent a small house in an area between the bar and the bakery. I also bought a car that was a few years old and didn’t stand out much, which is what I climb into now to drive over to the bakery.

There is a buzz of excitement going through my body even though I am trying not to think too much about this not date. My body doesn’t seem to care about reality and is happy to make me feel all sorts of unwanted things.

When I make it into town, I go directly to the bakery. As I’m pulling in, I spot Ash waiting, and he looks so different than the man I had seen not long ago. Instead of his dark biker look, he’s wearing a dark gray button-up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to the elbow and dark pants. He looks insanely handsome, but why did he get dressed up?

Was I supposed to get dressed up, too? Oh god…

I put my car in park, and he’s walking over to me, so I stay put and let myself calm down. When he reaches my car, he pulls the door open and smiles down at me.

“Hey Willow!” He says before holding his hand out to me to help me out.

There is less than a second’s hesitation before I accept his hand. I climb out of my car and try to step forward so that I can close the door, but Ash doesn’t move. I look up at him, and he’s looking at me with an intensity that could burn even the strongest metals. I watch his eyes move from my face to my lips and down my body before they snap back up to my eyes again.

“You look beautiful.” He says with a smirk.

“Uh, you do too. I feel a little underdressed. I hope your clothes don’t get ruined while we walk.” I let out a nervous laugh and tuck some hair behind my ear.

“I don’t mind getting a little dirty.” He says but not in a teasing way, or at least I don’t think so until he starts slowly smiling.

I let out a small laugh at his teasing and shake my head. “Nice one.”

He smiles wide. “Thanks. Shall we?”

He lifts his arm, and at first, I’m not sure what he’s doing, but he reaches down for my hand and lifts it to rest on his arm. This is a little strange, but I roll with it because I’m still trying to recover from the way he was looking at me and how close we were. Now we’re even closer, and he smells amazing. It’s this earthy smell combined with something rich and warm. I can’t quite explain it but I like it a lot. In fact, the urge to rub myself all over him gets stronger the longer we touch.

Who thinks about rubbing up on someone? No one because it’s weird! Was I a cat in another life or something?

Trying to stop thinking about rubbing up on Ash, I tell him a little bit about the park we’re going to like how part of it is a nature preserve.

“There is a whole area where no one is allowed to go so that the animals have minimal contact with humans. The town thinks it’s the best way to protect them by giving them space.” I explain as we cross the main street.

“What sorts of animals are there?” He asks.

“All sorts. There have even been reports of people hearing wolves, but those are just rumors. Most wolves moved further north, and one hasn’t been spotted in a long time. Still, people like to believe in things even if there is no clear proof.”

“Do you have an interest in wolves?” Ash asks.

I’m not sure how to answer that. The truth is that I was studying to be a wildlife veterinarian, with a minor in zoology, but that could be too many details about my past. I don’t want to lie to him, though. There is this feeling inside me that is telling me that I can trust him.

“I had an interest in a lot of animals. When I was growing up, I always wanted to grow up to help animals and learn everything about them. Most kids wanted to grow up and be firefighters or astronauts, but I wanted to study zoology.” I smile at the memories of being obsessed with reading any book I could find on animals.

“That’s cool. Did you ever pursue that?” He asks.

Shoot…Just do it! Trust him.

“I went on to college to become a wildlife veterinarian, but I still studied zoology as well. I figured I could travel the world to study animals but also help ones I find that are sick. But I wasn’t able to finish my degree. Um, some personal issues prevented me from continuing college.” I won’t tell him why.

I don’t want to tell him that I made a huge mistake and paid for it every day until I gathered the courage to run.

“That’s too bad. Can you finish by taking online classes? That’s what we did and a lot of friends as well. There are a lot of programs for that sort of thing.”

Of course, I looked into that, but I was worried that my ex would search for that sort of thing. He has connections that he could easily use to find out what school I’m studying at, even if it’s online. Then, he would be able to get my information and track me down.

“Actually, no, I haven’t tried that. I think I might!” Okay, I guess I won’t be honest about everything just yet.

We finally make it to the park, and I swear the cologne Ash is wearing gets stronger, and I’m moving before I realize what I’m doing. I pull my arm from his and move so that I’m standing in front of him. Then I’m pushing myself to my toes and wrapping my arms around his neck to pull him closer. He moves the rest of the way until his lips are on mine.