I started telling him about myself and trusted him completely. His gaze was directed at me and he radiated this warmth and security towards me.»Okay,.... well, in kindergarten I had my first great love, if you can call it that. His name was Thomas. We'd even kissed, just on the mouth, but he was my first boyfriend...' I smiled, thinking about that weightless time with Thomas. What was he doing today? After second grade, Thomas moved away with his family and I hadn't seen him since."That doesn't count..." Jayden laughed and gave me a quick wink. I had to laugh a little too."...okay, okay... So my first kiss....I had..with Dwayne..." I watched his reaction and he looked genuinely a little surprised. I got a little unsure at his look again and quickly continued talking. »...but that was just out of curiosity. We wanted to know how to kiss when we were twelve. So we thought we could try it together and kissed... It was so awful...' I laughed at the memory. Jayden just grinned. I had ne
There we were in Jayden's dad's pickup truck, right in front of my house. It was already six in the morning. I had no idea how the time went by so quickly, but Jayden felt the same way, I knew that.I looked over at him and he smiled at me with his tousled brown hair. "Thanks for the great evening... or rather night?!" He took my hand and kissed the back of my hand again. I didn't let go of his hand and kissed his cheek."I hope it wasn't so bad that we left your school party?" I shook my head slightly and stroked his hand, which I still held tightly."No, it was just right and the best breakfast I've ever had!" He smiled familiarly and pointed to the front door. I saw that the curtain on the window next to our front door moved a bit. Oh no."You'd better go inside..."I got very nervous because I didn't know what to expect at home. Hopefully I didn't get in trouble. "That must be my mom." I leaned in and planted a kiss on his warm lips, then quickly got out of the car. He waited unti
That's a really fat BMW. A matte black BMW was parked in front of our house and I was blown away by this car.Jayden held the door open for me and put his sunglasses back on. He planted a kiss on my cheek and I got in.When we finally drove off I turned the radio down. "What did my dad want from you?"He stared down the street. "It's not that important."I crossed my arms. "Jayden! Tell me!"He took a deep breath and began to explain it very calmly. "He made me realize I should be careful."I didn't understand. "What should you watch out for?"Jayden braked at a red light and looked at me. "Well, that with us! He warned me to leave you alone if I wasn't serious about you. After all, I'm a rock star!...” He looked at me, waiting for a reaction, but I looked sadly at the traffic light. “...Joey, it's okay. Look at the situation. He sees a famous guy with his vulnerable little daughter... I would do the same if I were him!'I shook my head. "It's not okay to threaten you!"But Jayden def
There was an excellent barbecue with everything your heart desired. It was so delicious and really really tasty that I stuffed myself totally full. I felt so bad after eating that I regretted eating so much.I helped clear the table with Debora while Jayden and his parents pounced on Dwayne. They questioned him, just like my parents did to Jayden earlier.Rachel was very grateful that we cleaned everything up, so she could relax too. I've always liked to help wherever I could.Debby told me where to find the toilet and I made my way through the big house. It was furnished as comfortably as I only knew from a catalog or TV series when they redecorated the houses.When I was on my way back out, I stopped briefly in the hallway to the living room. Family photos hung over the fireplace. I was blown away and even discovered Jayden as a little kid."What are you doing?" Jayden scared me to death and he wrapped his arms around me from behind and hugged me. He kissed my neck below my ear and
It was Sunday and I was hanging out alone with Dwayne again. I was with him and we played a bit on the PlayStation.In the afternoon Kirsten, Dan, Jane and Steve joined them. We had a lot of fun playing party games on the console and we all got to hang out together again.Dwayne's parents were with mine, having dinner together and enjoying the evening. So we had no storm. Dwayne ordered us some party pizza. As we were about to eat, Dan asked him. "Where is Debby anyway?"Dwayne spoke with his mouth full. "She actually wanted to be there for dinner!"Jane sat on Dan's lap. "Maybe something got in the way? She'll come...' And as soon as I said it out loud, the doorbell rang.Dwayne disappeared around the corner and several voices were heard. He came towards us with his widest grin. After that came Debby, two handsome boys I didn't know and Jayden. I didn't know I would see him and felt uncomfortable for a moment because I was wearing his hoodie, which he gave me on the pickup. He beamed
Jayden's expression turned very tense and uncertain towards me. His eyes went over the school parking lot again.Reality caught up with me faster than I thought. I climbed into Jayden's passenger seat like it was the only solution. Debby opened the door behind me and put my stuff inside. She nodded to me when I wanted to get in. "Come on, get in! I'm waiting for Dwayne!”I tried to smile, but had no idea what I was really able to produce.Jayden drove off the school grounds, scowling. I have no idea what he was thinking or what was going on in his head."Actually, I wanted to invite you to dinner? Would you like to?”I thought about it.Now I knew what Debby meant. So that's really what it's like to be with someone who's famous. People are talking, whispering, taking pictures and giving you really weird looks. I'm not really the guy who likes to be the center of attention and Jayden just does that. Of course there are people who don't give a fuck what we did or whether we loved each o
Kirsten and Steve got to go to this rock event, so Kirsten and I rushed over to my place as soon as possible after school. We changed quickly, unsure what to wear but decided to keep it casual. So it became Jayden's black hoodie fresh out of the wash, underneath a white top, my black jeans and the very best and most comfortable chucks I had. My shoes were a bit broken and had holes in the heels, but they were my favorite shoes. I left my hair loose at first, but took a hair tie with me, at some point it just always annoyed me, or if I got too warm, I always preferred it if I could tie a braid or a knot.It honked. Once again. And again.We ran downstairs and my dad was already standing in the door he held open for us."Have fun! Take some pictures, I'm really excited to see who you meet!«Music was blaring from a black VW van, another one was right behind it and Craig was in front of it. He pulled open the sliding door and grinned at us. Steve was also approaching the bus from across
We helped ourselves to the buffet and filled our bellies. So far it's really been a hammer day. Jayden and Taylor were being interviewed by a reporter and I was watching them from our table. He kept smiling and grinning and all I could see was his lips moving all the time. When Taylor was asked something, Jayden looked over at us and waved briefly. I waved back with a smile and continued chewing. The reporter automatically looked over and was briefly irritated by it. He asked Jayden what, he nodded and grinned sweetly. Taylor laughed briefly and then continued talking. I could watch him for hours as he gesticulated, laughed and especially his looks, I loved his expressive looks.The reporter ran away and the two boys wanted to come back to us. They didn't get far when a big friend approached them. It was the bitch from heaven back then, in her gold dress. I got big eyes and looked at her much too short pants, which just covered her buttocks and the crop top. I was really flabbergasted
We got closer to our friends again and got a few laughs and high fives, mostly from the boys of course, but TJ and I gave them high fives. All in all, the evening was really great and when we took the taxi home to TJ, I was almost closing my eyes from tiredness.TJ unlocked his front door and let me go first. We were both very calm and I just trotted back and forth, from the bathroom back to the bed, back into the bathroom, briefly into the kitchen and then finally, made-up off, changed and completely exhausted, I lay down in his bed. TJ came over to me for a moment and got a pillow from his bed, then he disappeared around the corner onto his sofa and it wasn't until I left that I noticed that he was only wearing shorts and a tight-fitting black undershirt, his back was immaculate and really nice in this.A few minutes passed and I just didn't hear from him anymore. It was too quiet and my brain turned on again. I thought about so many different things again and became more and more a
This Adam was really nice and really really sweet. He flirted a bit too much and too much for me, but it was just about okay. Maybe there was something to what TJ told me tonight. Maybe I really need a one night stand or something like that, but definitely not today. Not with this Adam. Then kissing, but I would need a few more drinks to be able to overcome that. Adam didn't dance very well, the only thing he could do was rub his body against mine and it was a bit annoying. I loved dancing too much and didn't always need this close dancing, especially not with Adam, I preferred dancing with my friends, so I knew that nobody would rub against me, you could dance with them quite normally. Adam was glued to me and really tried everything to get close to me. He pulled away from me briefly and turned next to us where his friends were probably all on the dance floor. I finally continued dancing on my own, how nice that was, but it didn't last long because when Adam turned back to me he imme
tjShe looked good, really damn good. She stood next to me and tied her hair together, moaning annoyed and scolding something I didn't understand and we waited for our taxi in the fresh air."I do not feel like! Let's go somewhere else!” Joey sounded really confident that I would do something else with her bad commanding tone. So she certainly didn't get through with me.The taxi came, we got in and I told the driver we wanted to go to Heaven . Joey looked thoughtful and annoyed out the window while I checked my cell phone messages again. A couple of girls had reached out, one cuter than the other, but there was nothing I could do today except take care of Joey. I just wanted to be there for her.After I paid the taxi driver, we got out and crossed the street."Do you think they're mad that we're only here now?" Joey walked beside me, casually fiddling with her hair again."No, at least we're coming, that's something!" I could already see Jamal in the distance and we walked towards hi
No thought of Jayden and off to TJ's home, just away from where everything reminds me of him . The exit would be so perfect, but no, TJ started talking about Jayden again and when we drove away, Jayden and Debby were of course standing at the Staffords' door, who were probably also just leaving the party. His gaze followed us and Jayden looked slightly confused and disappointed, staring at us as we pulled away in TJ's car. Debby's gaze, on the other hand, was a bit sour and I turned away from them again. TJ frowned at the street and I wasn't sure if he had seen Jayden at all, but didn't want to dig deeper. Jayden looked so damn good that my thoughts just turned to him again. I had forgotten how sweet he was and how his eyes met me again and again, especially what he could trigger in me, unimaginable. I was worried about how I would convey to him today what he thought of me and what would have happened if we had talked until TJ snapped me out of my thoughts. "What's the matter with tha
Great. I sat alone at the table with her sister and a silence fell between us. Slightly uncomfortable. I looked around to see how long Joey needed, but couldn't find her right away. Judith cleared her throat. »...um... I know we both had a rough start... But you're the only one Joey can get right now and I really appreciate that! Without you she would still be sitting in her room and probably wouldn't even have her degree in her pocket! I don't know what you have about you that makes her live again...but thanks TJ! For real! ...And since Tim thinks you're "okay" too, I may have misjudged you... That...that I'm sorry!"I was briefly flabbergasted by what she said and looked around again to see if Joey was finally coming, I finally spotted her but she was just pouring drinks and I turned back to Judith. »Well, I think anyone could have brought her out of her absolute low point...«She interjected and interrupted me. "No definitely not! I don't know how you do it. But it's the right way
After graduation, my friends and I were all invited to Dwayne's house with our families together. It was absolutely great that Neil made such a nice party for us in his garden. There I stood in my room and hung the robe back on my room door, looked at myself again in the mirror and was unsure because I didn't know if Jayden would come and if I would meet him there, let alone I was afraid of what would happen if he were there. Will he talk to me then? Am I going to go up to him and talk? Are we ignoring each other? Am I breaking down again? I shouldn't be so scared that I might run into him, but it's really killing me. Every thought I give to him kills me!!!!But I was glad that TJ still came and I got some emotional support.I went over to the Staffords with my parents and I was really nervous. There were a lot of people there, but I did n't see him . That was good. Was it? I really couldn't take it otherwise. I didn't want to see him, not even from a distance. I wasn't even ready to
"Are you nervous yet?" Today was the graduation ceremony on the sports field behind the school gym and I thought my mom was more nervous than me."It's still okay!" She handed me my red robe, which I put on and smiled happily at me.Dad, Judith and Tim were waiting at the car and I was allowed to sit in the front with my dad, who, like everyone else, had dressed up really well. He was super proud of me, I knew that, and honestly, I was a little bit too. The thought of graduating from high school was great, but it also sucked because I didn't know what I was going to do afterward. The college in town only had me on the waiting list, so I had to wait another semester because I didn't want to leave. My friends all had college places, some of them far away, which would mean that we wouldn't see each other again soon, at least very little and rarely. It sucked not knowing how my life would go on."Is your junkie boyfriend coming too?" I turned with a scathing look at Judith after Mom even
TJ was by my side the whole time, texting me daily and trying to cheer me up in any way he could. I haven't heard from Jayden for weeks, which was a good thing. After all, five weeks have passed since we parted ways at the airport. The first few days were the worst, some of which I can't even remember. My friends also said that I was just in a trance and not really responsive, which could also explain my memory gaps. With each week the pain in me lessened and my parents were really touching towards me. They both had a slight problem with TJ because Debby once told them everything about him in a short conversation, about his previous drug history, fights and his many affairs. Of course they weren't enthusiastic about him at all, but they still allowed him to visit me very often. Judith never liked him anyway, which he felt every time. I felt sorry for TJ because my family actually had something against him, but just tried to put it aside, which I've gotten really good at.We finally ha
tjShe lay back in my arms and closed her eyes.I have no idea what exactly happened but I would love to meet Jayden right now and tell him what a HUGE asshole he is! I would definitely smack him in such a way that he would first get to know the floor better. I really can't stand to see her like this anymore. What happened? He must have broken up, otherwise she would have been a little more composed! That fucking wannabe rocker!!! I'll kill him!!! It drives me crazy to see this woman suffer like that. How can he hurt this wonderful person like that? What did he do to her? Did she love him that much? If she were my girlfriend I would never have done that to her! This is such a great woman that you can't give it away anymore! He's such an asshole and so stupid! If he crosses my path, he's due!! ….But what am I talking about? I would never have a girlfriend because I couldn't keep it. I wouldn't be faithful and just as much of an asshole as him! I'm not a relationship type, when I look a