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Chapter 24
Under the subtly growing attentions of Lord Brendan, Alcina blooms like a sunflower in the sun.
She's never had someone treat her like something special, after all.
Sure, there had been her brothers. But given their place in her life - as her older brothers, obligated under their relation to love her. Though, she supposes her parents never seemed to feel that same obligation.
It had been difficult for her to find any legitimacy in their proclamations of her worth.
A child's first and foremost ideation of her worth, after all, stems primarily from her parents; and then from her peer group.
Alcina had lost the affections of the former when she turned ten with no Gift to speak of.
Alcina rapidly lost her peer group when the former decided that she was to be hidden away in the hopes that out of sight, out of mind would apply to the significant mark of failure on their House.
Having, suddenly, the kind of hypothetical gaze that Lord Brenda
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Brendan, who has undoubtedly noticed Alcina’s presence flitting behind him, keeps his eyes trained on the newcomers.“Must you always arrive in such an abrupt manner?” he sighs, and something about the tone relaxes some of the anxiety that had been building in Alcina’s chest.Alpha Percy’s pale lips quirk into a sharp smirk. The Alpha’s face remains as impassive as ever, though his eyes - bright and curious andkeen, like an eagle who’s spotted a bird of prey - remain fixed, for some reason, on Alcina.Alcina feels as though she’s been pinned to the floor she stands by the cat-eyed stare leveled upon her.She shifts, unconsciously, just an inch closer to Brendan. He brings a hand to curl around her hip, a weight that feels comfortingly likesafety.Like an assurance.The Alpha’s eyes, piercing, zoom in on the minute shift.“There is an urgent manner.”A
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“It is alright,” Darla says, with the kind of snappy openness that accompanies an uncharacteristic honesty for someone of their class.“I am a lot to digest’, or so Brendan says.”Brendan.Alcina wonders, not for the first time, if the semblance of normalcy and familiarity she’d been allowing herself to imagine in her head had simply been that: an imagination.Being suddenly confronted with all the bounds of a life she had no knowledge of reminds Alcina with sharp and bitter acrimony of just how little she knows about the lord.“Have you,” Alcina begins, hesitantly - but unable to help herself. “Have you known Brendan long?”Darla stares at her curiously.In Darla’s piercing and sharp gaze, curiosity feels more like being broken down and dissembled than merely inquired after.Alcina fidgets.“Brendan,” Darla drawls as though testing out the nam
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She only knows a stark and ugly honesty that her brother Nordin has constantly sighed would be her undoing one day.Nordin hadn't been wrong.Brendan is silent.So I am simply yet another burdensome thing to be set aside, out of sight.Alcina is sotiredof being set aside.Somewhere, in between Brendan looking at her with a gravity underpinning his gaze, as though Alcina were something particularly remarkable, and Brendan, allowing Alcina to cling to him, Alcina had forgotten what it felt like."Why am I not permitted to know?" It sounds childish and sullen, even to Alcina's own ears, but she feels so-choked up.The words come tumbling out without her control. "Would it really be so burdensome if I were allowed to-"Brendan's brow furrows harshly. "Because you do not need to know."Alcina physically jerks back as though stung. The bewilderment in Brendan's gaze grows more pronounced, as though he c
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When Alcina is ten years old, she learns, for the first time, what it means to bediscarded.It’s a strange concept for a child so young to learn; at the age of ten, most children are preoccupied with learning how to navigate that peculiar space, of beingeverything that matters, the center of the universe, to their parents.Instead, Alcina learned the deafening quietness of the spaces in which she’d been placed, out of sight, out of mind, and the hushed whispers that followed her wherever she went.Like the spare, which wasdefective.At twelve, Alcina loses herself to the fantasy world inside her head. She imagines what her life might have been like if she had been born with a Gift -anyGift - like she’d been supposed to have.At fourteen, she begins the painful and not at all pleasant process of learning to hide herself away, even before anyone asks.This is also the age where she starts t
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The following day, Brendan is called into another meeting with Percy and Waylon before they've even had a chance to eat breakfast.As it is, Alcina - pouting blearily and still ridden with sleep - insists on walking out with him, until at least the main hall, before parting ways.Here's another thing about finding all the depths of Alcina's affections returned to her following a lifetime of being chastised and sent away.It'saddicting, intoxicating, and exhilarating like nothing else.Alcina finds herself rapidly growing attached in a way that defies common sense and rationality.Alcina takes the chance to wrap her hands around Brendan's, reveling in the small, amused smile Brendan sends her all the while. Alcina, unable to do anything but smile shyly, sheepishly back.She can't bring herself to stop testing out the boundaries of the space she's permitted to explore. Because each tentative step reveals to her that thereare&
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Darla finds Alcina in the orchard by her usual tree.For a moment, Alcina is almost fooled into believing that it isGhost,given that the Lady Darla comes jogging up to Alcina in the form of a pitch-black wolf.Alcina is, once again, startled into pitching backward when the wolf suddenlyshifts into a woman,shrieking with laughter.Alcina pouts.Lady Darla drops into a graceful seat in front of Alcina with that unnatural, animalistic grace she always carries."Sojumpy," she teases, but it's without any malice.Alcina picks at the fabric of her dress, flustered and embarrassed and a little sulky."That's not very polite," she mutters, and her ears turn pink when Lady Darla, apparently, finds it uproariously funny."You're cute," Darla grins, sharklike.Alcina barely suppresses a shiver.And then, Alcina realizes what it must mean that Lady Darla is now out and about rather than shut in t
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At that age, when children learn to differentiate and understand various human emotions as displayed in the faces around them, The first emotion Brendan learned to decipher in his childhood was fear.The close second had come as- not quiterevulsion,but. Rather close.His mother, in particular, had never quite learned to overcome her knee-jerk reaction offear, terror horrorat her own son.As surrounded as Brendan had been by legions of people who feared and worshipped his “Gift,” he had nonetheless had an intimate opportunity to learn these same emotions from his own mother’s face.- and, to an extent, his father’s.But a child’s connection to his mother is the most intimate, strange, world-defying thing in the world.Being rejected by his own mother then had brought a crippling sense of alienation that cannot be replicated by the same rejection by his father, as devastating as both
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Brendan wakes from his sleep in the same instant way that he has a tendency towards.This means that Alcina doesn't have the time she needs to pull away and pretend shehadn'tbeen hovering over Brendan. That she was peering down at his features with curiously fascinated abandon.Brendan opens his eyes to Alcina's face, floating just inches above his. Alcina's doe eyes are round and glittering in the morning sunlight streaming through the curtains, seeming almost comically wide from the present angle below her nose.Heat floods Alcina's cheeks as she freezes, flustered, mouth parting and no explanation forthcoming save for incomprehensible stutters.Brendan's lips quirk upwards, transforming the blank cold face into something undeniablywarm. Creasing her features with lines that pull a weak smile from Alcina's lips, despite the blush still marring her cheeks."May I help you?" Brendan rumbles, perfectly polite even in th
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