I put my hands on my lap. Squeezing each other with anxiety and fear. Terror is increasingly taking over me. It's like a storm in the middle of a calm sea inside me, attacking suddenly and making the coast agitated. Swept all over the sand surface when it made high waves.I am the sand, and he is the storm.I'm not a girl who wants to be saved or wants revenge. I just want to forget and put it behind my life. But I couldn't because Nicholas had burned down the entire gas station. There will always be charred remains—and maybe a corpse—to remind me. I didn't see the cashier come out. He's a disgusting bastard, but does he deserve to be burned to death?My throat choking.I swallowed as the pain turned into something tangible that tormented me. The tightness in my chest and pain is not carelessness. My body is limp and helpless. Watching someone else take their life was the last thing I wanted. But with Nicholas, who will soon be a member of my family.. it always will be happen. Bloodsh
I sat in the kitchen, legs crossed on the chair, watching the raindrops fall through the windowpane."No no no!" Rianna, Elena's mother: our aunt threw a wooden spoon onto the kitchen table, having just tasted the red sauce Gal had prepared. Her sportsuit was purple today, and her hair was halved as usual. "Now you're dead and killed him."Gal sighed, her expression tightening in frustration. "How can I kill him again?""Your sauce is bitter, and he'll pass out."Amusement filled me. The last pot of sauce, Gal taking too long, and poor Nicholas dying of starvation.Auntie shook her head. "Unbelievable. I don't know how you didn't know how to cook spagetti sauce all this time. Your mom should pull you from that play you took and make you spend time in the kitchen."Gal leaned against the counter. A white apron covered her Hamlet T-shirt, longer than her shorts, and a yellow bandana kept her hair out of her face. "Elena can't cook either."Elena frowned."Elena's not getting married in a
Fire. We played with fire. This shouldn't be happening. This is confusing.Everything about this man confuses me. One second he's telling me he hates me, the next seconds he's kissing me. One second he's gentle with me, the next second he's ignoring me. I never understood. I never understood why he hated me in the first place. Why he did terrible things to me, making my college life miserable and miserable. Even though I never did anything to him. I acted normal, didn't care about him, and never wanted to get to know him. I didn't realise that it could ignite his lousy attitude.And now I never understood what his true motives were. Meeting me in Demonio after a long absence, making me unconscious and then taking my virginity. Coming back to be my twin sister's fiancé, forced me to admit that I remembered that night, being indifferent later, and kissing me again.He might be playing me, but I wondered what made him do that? Why didn't he try to be loyal about his relationship with Ga
Another party is happening. This time in Seattle.Which is expected if you live in the old money. Underneath, it's not as glamorous as it looks. There are so many sharp swords and needles that you'll get sick if you make the wrong move. Well, there was champagne, and if I could choose, I could finish two bottles of whiskey tonight. But I didn't do that because half of Mikhaelovich was here. They would break my bones if I did. I stood gracefully behind my parents and Pascha while wearing a mask: 'we are a happy, harmonious family'.I was pretty confident that I was already beautiful in my pale blue plain knee-length midi dress. Still, the dress was a little tight in my butt, so I was a little uncomfortable walking around. I opted for natural makeup and slightly bright lipstick. My hair, which had been styled by my mother's makeup artist, was down to my waist. And a smile was always on my lips when I was introduced or reacquainted with everyone here. My teeth would dry out later from
I went out with Rafaella, who answered some of my questions about her advanced fashion business. I admired her so much for what she had done. Trying to keep building her own success rather than sitting back and feasting on her parents' wealth.She was free.And very charming.If I could choose, I'd like to be born again as her.I faded my smile when Rafaella excused herself from joining her family. I saw her approach her twin, Amanda, sitting at the minibar, taking several sips of beer. Her twin was already very drunk, and as Rafaella said, there was no one to bother her but the woman I didn't know beside her. Amanda Dimitriou didn't even care about the world around her. She kept sipping as many beers as she wanted as her parents stared at her from afar.Tired from observing, I found my way back to my family. But I was already being pulled by my Papa through the look in his eyes, ordering me to come to him. I clenched my fists as I approached him while putting on a determined smile.T
There comes a point in life when you know that what you want to do is wrong, and you have to decide whether to avoid the temptation or do it anyway.I do it.Nicholas's words should have left fear in my stomach. However, they had the opposite effect, soaking into my skin and sending breathless shivers to my toes. He was rude, arrogant, and slightly psychopathic. The logical part of me didn't like him. But the physical part—God, how it wanted to give him whatever he wanted. Which was a serious problem.Only made more serious by the fact that her statement sounded suspiciously like jealousy. The idea left a sensation even as he slammed the door in my face. It left a dangerous and insidious desire to know for sure.What I was doing was manipulative and a little childish, but I didn't have time. I wanted this new man's interest, and I wanted him fast. Although, I may have challenged Nicholas' possible jealousy more than anything else.I had to know if this wasn't an embarrassing one-sided
I searched my chest for everything that was missing, but it was too much. Things that had been stolen: my childhood, love, passion for life, and everything about happiness and hope. Hope... since when did holding onto hope become something dangerous for me?"Wakey, wakey." Someone woke me up. It was Gallena, with her brilliant voice that could annoy anyone.I looked at her with my irritated eyes.She looked at me innocently. "What? I just woke you up. It's already eight in the morning.""Well, you need to know that I'm not working today."It's Sunday. I've told everyone I will be lazing around, to which Mama replies that it's a good idea. Apparently, being lazy was the only thing she approved of rather than us choosing to be passionate or free. I honestly wanted the latter. Being in Demonio had always been a good idea. But my parents were still here, visiting a pointless party. I, on the other hand, couldn't do anything."Yeah, everyone already knows that." She threw her body onto my
His kiss was hard, like he always did, until it could break down whatever walls were inside of me. Piece by piece.His hands moved to my waist, and I realized I had no defense against him. Nobody makes me feel this way.With Nicholas, I was no longer trapped outside of time. My body was shivering with cold. Instead, I blazed a hell of longing and lust, fantasy and forbidden pleasures.I've never looked for myself. What I wished for and my hopes collapsed before my parents moved me. I realized that I couldn't do it, and I stopped wishing.And that scared me the most: I was so used to feeling empty that I didn't know how to fight. Fighting a man who somehow fits inside me like the second half of my soul.Even if he is the worst thing for me.Even if he threatens the stability, I find in other people.Nicholas didn't wait for my answer before moving his mouth along my jawline, his scent seducing me, his heat enthralling me, his spells entwined so tightly I was powerless against him.I ca
Nicholas really took me away. It was a long trip because we were on a plane, and I only found out when the pilot told me where we were going."Spain?" I asked, looking at Nicholas sitting beside me with so much surprise.He nodded. "Put your seatbelt on, baby."I shook my head. "I don't want to go anywhere. I want to go back."Nicholas shook his head with a frown on his forehead. "I'm sure you'll regret it.""Then tell me where you're taking me!" my voice rose an octave.He only raised an eyebrow and let out a long sigh. "Gallena."My eyes widened."I'll take you to Gallena's place."My heart was beating so fast with emotion that I almost fell forward as the plane began to take off. He clucked, wrapping one arm around my waist. "Put your seatbelt on." He growled.I put it on quickly. Leaning against the seat as the plane began to take off. I turned to him with a twinkle in my heart. "Do you mean it?"Nicholas nodded."Is she in Barcelona?""She's in Ibiza, I think it's a safe place f
Flashback :The hollow emptiness going on inside me didn't fix anything. It was empty and frozen. I've had many losses, and I don't know what could break me more than this one. It consumed me more than any previous loss.My baby...I haven't even had a chance to see what my baby looked like before it left me.And...Why my baby?Why wasn't it just me who died?I huddled under the thick blanket that was not familiar to my nose. A hospital bed, pillow and blanket. Which was unfamiliar because I had never experienced a hospital stay. It was excruciating, and I didn't want to come back here again. But this was still better than Mikhaelovich's death house if I could choose. It was a good thing I'd been expelled, strange because the relief seeped through me like water in a dam that was never released.I stroked my stomach, something I always did these days, even though the pain seemed to split me in two.A click came from the door behind me. I didn't need to turn around to see who had just
Two Months Later Time seemed to fly by until the church doors finally opened wide, the warning of the bride's arrival making everyone look impatiently toward the entrance. I stared at the beautiful woman in a bone-white wedding dress with a high bust. After my challenging debate with her, I finally won. Of course, with a very effective tactic: making her unable to walk with our long sex and making her surrender. And I have absolutely no regrets. She was so beautiful, gorgeous, and fabulous. My heart swelled stupidly. Like the mellow atmosphere of those cheesy romance movies she always liked, but different from those stupid movies, I liked what I felt now. Enjoying everything in every part of her. I love her. Loved her so much that I thought I would kill myself when she was in pain. That agony was behind us, and I learned my lesson. We both did. Learned to be better and accept each other. My mom said it's love and doesn't always go smoothly. All we can do is stay together and go
I looked at Gretta, who was lying on the bed.In a quiet corner of the room, the serene atmosphere inside the hospital room was only interrupted by the regular hissing of breath from the bedridden Gretta. Her face reflected profound exhaustion and sadness as if a disaster had rolled over her like an endless storm. I sat beside her with a blank look. The miscarriage had robbed us both of the glimmer of happiness they had just begun to achieve.Everything that surrounded us was messing her up, messing me up. Us.The pain split me in two. Realizing what we had lost, the cause of my own carelessness. If only I hadn't come and thrown a bomb at her, if only I hadn't brought her to my apartment, if only I hadn't abandoned her.. that fetus would still be between us. That baby.. whether a boy or a girl, would have been a testament to our feelings. I loved her, damn it. I loved her so much that jealousy about her leaving me ruled me more than my trust in her. I should have known better than
My heartbeats shattered one by one, making my chest ache.My vision blurred behind the tears and the glare of the sun on the marble floor. Once the crying started, my tears flowed like I had just opened a dam that had been closed for years. I stood in the middle of a beautiful apartment and felt nothing but cold and empty. The emptiness expanded until it threatened to eat me alive.How accurate was my belief that Nico was an addiction because this felt like the worst kind? I began to realize that it was more than that-it was love and it was heartbreak.I went to the master bathroom, turned on the shower, went inside, and cried some more. My mind was spinning with desperate thoughts of how to fix it, but it all ended on a desperate note when I thought of her cold demeanor today.Nausea rolled around in my stomach.I've been trying not to fall for him, and I've fallen so hard that I'm physically sick from his rejection. I could have laughed if I still had the energy left to cry.I got o
"What are you going to do?" Baron's hoarse voice came into my ears."Keep it." I took a breath and let it out softly. Calming the chaos inside me. "I will tell Nicholas about this, but I will wait for the right time.""If he doesn't accept it..." Baron stroked my arm. " ... you know I will always be here for you, right?"I nodded, hugging Baron tightly."He's crazy about you, Gretta. I know that. He'll accept it. He won't dump you or do anything bad to you." He said as we broke the hug. "Everyone can see it. He's just too stupid to admit his feelings."Well, I hope that's true. I nodded. "I'm waiting for him." I looked down at the bracelet on my right hand, which I never took off. "I have to do something first to give my heart to him, Baron."Because I will never let go of the past if I don't let go of it myself."Are you sure that you've disappeared from his shadow?" asked Baron.I nodded. "I'm sure," I replied. My whole heart had flown away, and I was about to move back into my froz
I saw the news and couldn't imagine what was going on in my family. I was sure my parents were cursing me and Gallena, planning what would happen to their two rebellious daughters.I was the one who ran away from my fiancé's house and was with my affair. While Gallena ran away from home pregnant. They thought we should return the favor about all that they had given us, the luxuries and stuff, the limited freedom, and the damn convenience of staying in our rooms. Ironically, that's not the same as what most parents give their kids.So, now, what do I do? Do I stay here and hassle Nicholas until I can stand on my own, which... I don't know when that will be? Because I can't possibly depend on him entirely.What are we? We were nothing other than me having sold my body for my own gain and falling in love with him while he didn't love me back. I sighed.Or could I go back to my parents' house-because it had never been my home-take my things, and then go to Baron's place? They couldn't d
My control was hanging by a thread as I listened to my men. Lorenzo also seemed intent on easing our uncle's burden.Uncle Benito and Gerald seemed to be quarreling secretly, but I was sure they were planning to overthrow me behind closed doors. Benito is a coward, and Gerald is only slightly better, but eventually, they will act. Perhaps Gerald would send his remaining legitimate son to kill me."War is inevitable," I growled. "You know that as well as I do. Don't pretend you haven't been waiting for an opportunity to spill Outfit blood again." My Underbosses nodded, and so did most of my Captains. But not Benito and Gerald.My eyes were fixed on the high ceiling of the power plant. I had chosen it at every meeting of my Captains and Underbosses over the past three years to remind them of my bloody declaration. I felt their memories needed to be refreshed.Gerald banged his fist on the table, returned my gaze to him, and swatted away Uncle Torre's calming hand. "Enough," he muttered.
Being stuck with Nicholas felt different from being stuck with Louis. I realized this a long time ago.I couldn't even spend five seconds next to Louis; a strange and uncomfortable feeling always surrounded me when I was with him, even before he was forced to become my fiancé or before I knew all his secrets.But now, when I was with Nicholas, I had a different, disturbing feeling. It was as if all the storms were coming together, and I wanted nothing more than to be with him as long as possible, even though I knew he was in darkness and danger. His name is a disaster; you must escape him if you do not want to be destroyed.But here I am, and so is he. Instead of a disaster, he became one of the people who saved me from the real disaster. He's the one by my side, caring for me more than everyone who should do it for me. For the first time, I know what it feels like to be truly loved, although I don't know if he feels the same way about me.I found him in the kitchen after I'd had enou