Marcus As I prepared for bed, I could not help but replay how the evening had gone. Our daily cuddles were the best, and I really look forward to them. The kind contact healed something profound in me, and while the closeness made my body heat up, the companionship part and the care were what I looked forward to the most. I loved his reaction to what he called the “make-over,” making him happy fed a deep need in me. I smile when I remember his Sheldon dig; I am not offended at all because he is my favorite character! The next morning i am up again before him, which means I get another opportunity to make him breakfast. I chop up some vegetables, and soon I have coffee and a mushroom and spinach omelet plus toast by the time he makes an appearance. While I enjoy the view of him in a suit and he is truly magnificent, it only means that he is spending another day at the office and I will be left alone in the house. I am disappointed though I try not to show it. “You are just in ti
Simon I think my brain has short-circuited because I was kissing Marcus back. His kiss caught me off guard, but I would be lying if I didn't say I had been longing for it. The kiss ignites a fire deep within, and I can feel him get consumed by it as well. I let go, and soon we are grinding against each other, and I just want to rip off his clothes so I can touch the hot skin under me. He seems to have the same idea because his hand is under my shirt, trying and failing to open the buttons. He moans in frustration and desire, and soon my buttons fly everywhere when he rps it in half. This jolts me back to my senses, and I stop. He opens his eyes, eyeing me questioningly. I move away from the couch and try to catch my breath. His questioning gaze has now turned into vulnerability, and I can see him shrinking into himself. Shit, he thinks I am rejecting him because I don't want him. I move back to the couch, pull him into my lap, and kiss him softly. "I want you so bad, M, but no
Marcus I was on a permanent high. Life was great. I have finally found my place, and I couldn’t be happier. We settled on a routine we would wake up with someone giving someone a blow job, shower together, then I would made breakfast while Simon got ready either for the office in town or the house office. We had breakfast together and, if he was working from home, lunch as well. Dinner is always in front of the Tv as we watch a show together. We had finished BBT, and now we were watching Young Sheldon, and yes, we are obsessed with the show. We cuddled and made out before heading to bed for more of the same. We hadn’t had penetrative sex yet, but we had done everything else, and it’s been great. It’s been blissful, and that’s why David caught me off guard. On Thursday, Simon had announced that he was bringing his closest friend for dinner. This made me nervous and excited at the same time. I had yet to meet any of his friends, not that he seemed to have many, I figured this mea
Marcus Our weekend was subdued; on Saturday and Sunday we had a late breakfast, and Simon went to his office until late. I went to bed early, pleading with a headache one night and fatigue the next, but the truth was I was still reeling from what David had said. I was trying to figure out what everything he had said meant, and it was eating at me. I knew he was douche and that he was probably lying, but I somehow knew there was some truth to some of his rantings; I just needed to figure out which. My insecurities had come back full force, and I struggled to put that genie back in the box. Why would a man like Simon want someone as broken as me? He must be doing it out of pity, right? I wasn't as educated as David or handsome, and that was his ex! How long would it take before he booted me out too? Simon tried to ask me what was wrong, but how could I explain what was going on in my head? How could I tell him that the darkness I try to keep at bay is hovering closer than ever?
Simon I was in a good mood today. Finally, the dark mood that had engulfed Marcus seems to have lifted and it was such a relief to know that he was getting better. I really hope he agrees to see a therapist so I can finally breath. Although it was a packed day at the office, I did my job with a smile and counting down to the time I will get home. Today we were going to order a pizza and start our Marvel marathon cannot wait to introduce the avengers to him. Yes, I know it is silly to get so excited about super hero movies but it is something I have loved since I was a child. It is a love I shared with my childhood friend and my first boyfriend Sami. The thought of Sami makes me sad and I try to shake the feeling away. I work through lunch because I really need to finish all the paper work before I can go home to Marcus. When I finally shut down the computer its late afternoon and I really need to rush if I am to make it before rush hour. I stop by David’s office to let him know I had
Marcus I dont know how I got into the motel. But here I am checking in; it’s the kind of motel that one can pay by the hour, and I pay for three nights, not because I have plans after but because I don’t know how long the money I have will last or how long I will be able to hold on. It’s becoming more and more difficult to breathe, and I am almost engulfed by the darkness. At this moment, I am so grateful that Simon had paid me weekly for the cleaning and that he had been more generous than a typical employer because I would have ended up sleeping under the bridge, although, to be honest, the motel was only marginally better. I take the bulky key from the bored receptionist, head up the four flights of stairs, and fumble with the key at the door before entering the tiny room. The bed is a twin bed, and it looks slightly comfortable; the covers are threadbare. There is a small desk and chair beside the bed and a door leading to a small bathroom and sho
Simon Like all bad news, the call came at midnight, it had been three days of worrying and looking and making numerous calls to a cop friend, but I still wasn't prepared. I had driven around town, even returning to that spot on that bridge with my heart in my mouth, bracing for the worst. However, it had been empty, and I still couldn't reconcile feeling relief and disappointment at not finding him there. So when the call came, I was ready for anything, or so I thought. My cop friend Paul called to tell me they had found Marcus, and it wasn't looking good. He had warned me that it was touch and go, but I didn't even have time to let that sink in as I rushed to St Maria hospital at the edge of Montre groove. I had not been prepared for the sight of him with tubes all over him or the way he looked so pale and small. I felt a lump in my throat as I got nearer; his hands were strapped to the bed, a precaution I was assured by the hovering nurse for all patients who were at risk of self
Marcus Everything hurt. What was happening to me? my mind feels foggy, and I can’t seem to be able to focus on anything but the pain. I try to open my eyes, but it hurts too much. "Hey Marcus can you hear me? Welcome back. You had us worried there for a minute," a cheerful and too loud A voice tells me. Where was I? I try to remember where I was, but I keep drawing a blank. I give up trying to open my eyes or remember and surrender to the darkness. The next time I wake up, someone is standing right next to my face, fiddling with some beeping machine. I want to ask them to move, but I can't seem to be able to form words; my eyes don't hurt as much as before, but I still can't seem to focus. I try to form words, but I feel so tired and dazed. The person standing there says something to me, but it sounds so far away, and I can't concentrate. He moves away, and another person joins him, his presence fills me, and I try so hard to think why; a nagging feeling tells me I should recogni