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THIRTY FIVE
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2021-07-06 06:49:45LOREN'S POINT OF VIEW
Without saying a word, I stood there staring at him, processing his words.
It's easier said than done, my entire life is here, it's quite tempting to leave this toxic marriage but what happens I when leave?
My mind clouded with different thoughts in just seconds of those words being uttered.
"You don't have to say anything, just think about it." He placed left his hand on my shoulder.
That's a relief.
But it didn't take the pressure off completely, I still can't stop myself from overthinking.
He swam away while I floated on the water, acknowledging the awkwardness of tension that snaked its way into the atmosphere.
Should I say something?
Maybe not, I might just say something stupid but this is undeniably weird. Everywhere so quiet except for the sound of the busy pool.
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FEW WEEKS LATERLOREN'S POINT OF VIEW"Hey." I awkwardly muttered, covering my baby bump with my coat. I slowly bent down holding the flowers on my right hand, looking at the tombstone before placing it on the grass.With a sad smile, I stood up while holding my baby bump."I sat in the car for hours because I didn't think I had the courage to be standing here but here I am, here I am." I repeated. I don't know why I just kept on staring at the birth year and year of death.Too soon."I am sorry, it's all my fault. It's all my fault that you are gone and I can't do nothing about it." I looked up trying to prevent the incoming tears from falling, I promised myself I would not cry but it is becoming harder.My eyes went to the other grave beside the one I am standing on, it's has Ace's dad name boldly written on it."Co
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LOREN'S POINT OF VIEW"Javi, please put the gun down." Ace voice came again this time calmer, my heart beating fast at each passing moment as the gun moved back and forth between me and Ace."Shut the hell up, that's not going to work again, I am not stupid." He yelled, anger evident in his eyes, one can tell it is only a thin thread that is holding him from completely loosing it."You know what? Both of you get the hell up." I slowly got up so did Ace, he pulls me behind him which I didn't like.I did notice Ace eyes constantly flickering from the ground and back at Javier, I followed his eyes only to see the gun which he dropped earlier.I froze at the thought of what he's about to do.Is he trying to get himself killed?Ace is obviously not thinking straight before he can get to the gun,
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ACE'S POINT OF VIEW."Bet you didn't know, Louisa was in love with you, she was madly in love with you right from the start, she was going to leave me because of you." I froze at his words, staring at him in disbelief.Th-that's impossible.I raised my head only to notice the gun being pointed at me.I gulped hard, trying to process it all.He's lying, he has to be.He let out a low laugh, turning the gun back to his head."Always oblivious aren't you, Ace Grey loved by all yet he doesn't know." I didn't know what to say or think."Since we were kids, she loved you more than a friend. Louisa had always loved you and I had always loved her." My breaths soon became forced, realizing how everything is my fault.
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ACE'S POINT OF VIEW.I watched her walk out of the club like something heavy just hit hard on my chest, I found my self feeling uneasy at each retracting step.It hurts that I hurt her, I wanted her to feel what I'm feeling by saying those things to her but it just became worse, I feel worse.I'm an ass. It's not her fault that I fell in love with her, it's not her fault at all. All this is my fault.My heart took control of my legs, I found myself outside the club looking for her so that I could apologize, tell her I didn't mean what I said.I finally spotted her car before I could get to it, it started moving. My head is telling me to go back into the club but my heart has other plans.So I got into my car and stupidly followed her all the way back home.
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LOREN'S POINT OF VIEW I looked over my shoulders to ensure that Javier is asleep, it's been 2 hours since Ace texted for us to meet. 2 hours of pure anxiety, I'm so anxious as I wonder what he's thinking right now? Is he mad at me?. I have made up my mind I'm going to tell him everything, I don't want to lose him. I just can't. My life is already fucked up as it is, I just want to the runway as Ace suggested. I'm done playing a cop, things are way bigger than me now, I have this lookout for my unborn child. Unborn child. I couldn't help but smile at the thought, I can not think of a better man to be with when welcoming this baby to the world. Excitement replaced my worry, no matter who the father is,
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LOREN'S POINT OF VIEW. All I could do was take rapid breaths in and out, feeling like if I don't breathe for a second the weight on my chest will rise up to my throat, tighten it and choke me up until I give out. I sat frozen on the bathroom floor, staring at down at the black tiled floor, fearing that moving an inch would mean facing reality, a reality that I'm damn sure I don't face, I can't face. Many thoughts have run through my head, thoughts I'm not proud off and it's eating me up alive. How can I be this stupid, this can't be happening to me, I don't miss my pills, I mean I don't think I did. Gosh, I'm so stupid. I don't want to be pregnant, I can't be, my life's a mess and its all my fault. I pretty sure the water in my eyes has run dry, totally b
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LOREN'S POINT OF VIEW. "I love you." My heart skipped a beat, while processing his words. I stared right into his eyes, my heart hurts just staring at the admiration in his eyes. I tried not to let the incoming tear drop but its hard just staring at the expectation in his expression. I bit my lips in a stupid attempt to ensure that I don't say something stupid, silence filled the room. He broke the stare, the smile that was once on his face disappeared slowly, breaking my heart. What's wrong with you Loren? I finally moved, I slowly placed my arms around his neck, lifting my feet up a little bit, staring directly into his eyes. I leaned in placing my lips on his, he didn't move for a second, my heart beating hard as my closed my eyes, he soon puts his ha
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LOREN'S POINT OF VIEWI walked into the boutique, giving a tight smile to the cashier and at the corner of my eyes I spotted Leah, I looked away immediately, pretending to shop.I took out some clothes not paying attention, I walked over to where Leah is at pretending not to see her."Loren?" I turned to feign surprise."Leah," I called out, pulling her to a hug, which is super awkward.Leah could be the key to knowing what job my dear husband is actually involved in. She was able to slip once, I can get do it again."What are you doing here?" She asked."I shop here all the time." I lied."Really? I own this place." I gasped, trying to look surprised.
