Chapter 24 - You Are My Song

One night I had the idea of sending Rai a voice note of me singing. I decided to sing the song ‘Right Here Waiting’ by Richard Marx. First, I needed to ask Damian if he could play the piano.

I went down and found him in front of the tv, as usual. I wondered why he didn’t watch the tv in his room, but I had a more important thing to think about, so I brushed that thought away.

“Damian, can you also play the piano?” I asked him, my body settling beside him as he circled his arm around me.

“Why, Baby girl?” He asked as he caressed my hair.

“I want to sing for Rai, and I need you to play the piano.. if you can.” I blushed because I knew I couldn’t sing, and he might laugh at me.

“Hmm.. Okay. Which song?” He asked me. Thankfully, he didn’t laugh.

“It’s this one.” I let him hear the song.

“I know that song. Come.” He pulled me to the grand piano. As he sat down, he extended his hand, but I preferred to stand when I sang, so I told him so.

“Please don’t laugh at me. I know I can’t really sing, but I want Rai to know that I’m waiting for him to come back here,” I said as I stood beside the piano.

I readied my phone to record, and Damian started playing the piano. He played beautifully.

I closed my eyes the whole time I was singing, not wanting to see Damian’s expression, and trying hard to put my feelings into the song, so Rai would know how much I missed him and that I would be here, waiting for him.

I finished singing and waited for Damian to finish playing the song. Once he finished, I thanked him, took my phone, and sent the song to Rai.

I placed my phone down again and turned toward Damian while asking him if he could also sing.

“You don’t think I can sing, Baby girl?” He raised an eyebrow at me.

“I don’t think so.” I laughed.

“Let me show you how good I am.” He smiled devilishly.

He started playing ‘You Are My Song’ by David Archuleta. He caught me singing along to the song once and asked me about it. It didn’t occur to me that he would be playing this song, though.

You are the song

Playing so softly in my heart..

As he started singing, I felt my jaw drop. His voice was even better than Rai’s. He looked at my reaction and smirked but continued singing.

I reach for you

You seem so near and yet so far

I hope, and I pray

You'll be with me someday..

While Rai’s deep smooth voice was somewhat sweet-sounding, Damian’s deep husky voice was hauntingly beautiful and sensual. I felt hot just by listening to his singing voice. It was so alluring that I felt my whole body tingle. Damian looked at me and smiled seductively. I could feel myself blushing.

He closed his eyes and continued singing.

How can I

Each time I try to say goodbye

You were there..

The more he sang with his eyes closed, the more feelings he put into the song. He sang with so much passion that it reverberated throughout his whole body. I could hear it in his voice; I could see it in the way his body moved. I could see it in his expression, even with his eyes closed. He was in pain! Not the same pain he showed during our car-wash session, but something else.

I know for sure

That we were meant to fall in love..

He opened his eyes and looked straight into mine. His gaze was so deep that it bore right into my soul.

That was when I saw it, pain mixed with longing.

I try not to say

The words that might scared you away

I know down inside

You are mine and I'm your true love..

His emotions were etched on his handsome face. A longing and pain so deep that it hurt even me. It pulled me to him, awakening something inside me. A yearning.. a yearning so deep to make him not feel the pain anymore.

Who would make him feel such emotions? Judging from his choice of song, was he in love with someone all these times but couldn’t have her? It pained me to even think about it. He kept gazing at me while I went to him.

I sat down next to him and caressed his cheek.

“Damian..” I whispered to him as he closed his eyes at my touch.

“Damian, I’m here,” I told him as I hugged him. I could hear his voice faltering, he couldn’t seem to control his emotions, and I could see a tear running down his cheek. I wiped his tear away and kissed his cheek gently as he kept singing with his eyes closed.

We can share tomorrow and forevermore

I'll be there

To love you so

You are my song..

He finished his song and took a few deep breaths. I could sense that he was trying to compose himself.

I just sat there and waited for him, with my arms circling his neck.

“Kat, Baby girl.” I could hear his voice as he touched my arm. I looked up to see him.

“Damian, I’m here,” I repeated myself as I caressed his cheek again.

“I know, Baby girl. I know.” He whispered. He placed my hand on his heart. It was beating so fast. His gaze darted to my lips, and he slowly caressed my bottom lip.

“Damian?” I asked him. The way he caressed and stared at my lips made me nervous.

“Baby girl.. I’m going to kiss you,” he said next.

Before I could comprehend his words, I felt his lips crushing mine. I gasped, and his tongue slipped into my mouth. He kissed me with so much hunger it made me dizzy.

His soft and full lips, his tongue twirling with mine, the taste of him - minty and sweet like candy, was more than I could bear. How could a man such as Damian taste so sweet? And how could just a kiss from him electrify my whole body?

The way he kissed me, he was better than any man I had ever kissed, even better than Rai! I kissed him back without thinking, deepening our kiss. He broke our kiss and his lips trailed down my jawline to my neck.

“Damian..” I could hear myself moaned.

Suddenly he pulled back, hugged me tightly, and said, “Kat, Baby girl. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”

I was too dizzy from all his kisses to reply to him. My heart was racing, my breath uneven. I could feel Damian’s heart racing too.

What just happened? Why did he kiss me? Why did I kiss him back? Why did I enjoy it so much? So many questions circled through my mind.

I knew why, but I denied it. I was too afraid of the answers. I was Rai’s. I loved Rai. This must be because of the song. I guessed we both got carried away by Damian’s voice. I tried to make a reasonable excuse for what just happened.

“Kat, Baby girl, will you forgive me?” Suddenly I heard Damian ask, with me still in his embrace. And all I knew was that I wanted to feel the warmth of his body on mine. I hugged him back tightly and nodded.

“Thank you, Baby girl,” he said softly. He then pulled me toward the sofa, and I snuggled close to him. I hugged him as close as possible, not wanting to let go.

“Damian, I’m sleepy. Can I sleep with you tonight?” I asked him as I started to feel sleepy. I wanted to be in his arms tonight.

I could feel him carrying me to his bed and hugging me.

“Kat, Baby girl, you are my song,” he whispered ever so softly that I wondered whether it was a dream or reality as I drifted off to sleep.

That was the first time that I slept in Damian’s arms.

After that night, I spent more nights sleeping in Damian’s arms than I slept in Rai’s room. Why? I put it down as not wanting to feel lonely. I loved being in Damian's arms; his warmth around my tiny body felt so comforting.

I knew I shouldn't seek comfort in his arms, but Rai had allowed it, and as long as nothing untoward happened between us, it should be okay, shouldn't it?

Sometimes at night, I could feel his erection against my bum, but I ignored him, knowing that sometimes men had erections while sleeping.

Other times I would grind my bum against him, thinking that it was Rai holding me. I could feel his hand move up to cup my breast, but he stopped. It all happened so fast that I always thought I was dreaming.

***

One night, I woke up and couldn’t feel his warmth against my body, so I turned my body to reach for him. Instead, I saw him standing up, his back toward me. I could see that he was taking deep breaths.

“Damian? Why aren’t you in bed?” I asked him sleepily.

He turned around as he heard my voice.

“Sometimes it’s hard to be close to you, Baby girl,” he said while exhaling.

“You don’t want to be close to me?” I asked him. I was sad that Damian would feel that way.

“No, Baby girl. It’s just..” He didn’t finish his sentence, and I could see him blushing.

Damian blushed? What could be the reason behind his blush?

“Do you not want me here?” I asked him instead, my voice small, not really wanting to know the answer.

“No, Baby girl. I want you here with me,” he said as he climbed into bed and held me.

I drifted back to sleep the moment I felt his arms circling my body.

Being with Damian really helped with my loneliness. I wasn’t feeling so lonely anymore, but I never really thought of my feelings for him or his feelings for me.