Chapter 6

Thinking about her makes me want to see her. I push away the thought.

" I don't need the girl. I don't worth her. " I say silently.

" What girl? " Trace asks. I must have said that aloud.

My face goes red with embarrassment and I laugh nervously to hide it.

"Aww, Trace, nobody. There is no girl. "

Trace looks at me with that cynical look of hers. I am convinced the lady is a mind reader. She laughs mockingly at me and sluggishly push her pregnant body away from the studio. I am left alone with Stan.

" I painted that during the one week I spent in Florida some years back" Stan says pointing to a watercolor hanging on the wall.

" It's beautiful " I say this time not for want of what to say but because the painting of the beach with the sun setting above it is truly beautiful.

" It is" Stan agrees. " just look how the light plays softly above the water. It is a favorite. Serene "

" Yeah, I can almost feel the silence " I reply.

Stan comes to sit beside me on the couch where I sat starring at the picture.

" Dan, you're from Florida right? "

" I am "

" You like it there? "

" I prefer it here " I realize I am being truthful. There are a lot of things to be thankful for in Kansas. Stan looks down at his fingers, they seem to be permanently covered in red paint. I wonder if they ever come off.

" I do too. " He says. I am taken aback by this reply.

" What d'ya mean?  You are not from here? " I ask.

" No man. Detroit. "

Well, my surprise is genuine. I have always concluded Stan and Trace were both from Kansas. The look on Stan's face is also confusing. I can see an emotion in his eyes similar to the one I often see in mine when I look in the mirror. Right now, he looks nothing like his usual macho self. 

"Say man, ever wanna go back home, to Detroit I mean? " I ask before I can stop myself.

"Dunno bro. Where's home? Home is nowhere but here " Stan says and beats his chest.

"Trace and the unborn child, that's home. " I nod in agreement. I believe Stan. Home is not a house with an address. It is the people we love and care about. Stan has his home with Trace and the baby. The silence in the room is deafening. I wonder if I would ever boast of having a home in the future. For now, I know I do not have one.

In this silence, I know Stan and I share something in common. Whatever it is, I do not know for certain but I can feel it even as I feel our friendship grow deeper.

*       *         *

JOSIE

" This dress, it was your mom's. She wore it to our prom. That was the night I fell in love. " Dad and I are standing in the attic upstairs starring at the red ball gown wrapped in a transparent plastic bag. There is tears in dad's eyes as he relives the night he met and fell in love with my mother.

"It's so pretty. " I say. It is indeed a beauty to behold. It is a simple strapless dinner gown with sequins. It shone brightly in the dark. I haven't seen this dress until today. I still do not know why dad choose to show it to me few days to my prom night.

"She would want you to wear it, Culutiwa. " Dad turns to me, the tears in his eyes gives them a glistened look.

" You sure? " I ask doubtfully. It would be quite an honor to go to my own prom in the same dress my mom wore to hers. An honor I am not quite sure I deserve yet.

" Yes Culutiwa. You deserve it and more. All you have done ever since she died is being the best daughter. I am very sure your mom and little brother would want you to wear it. " The tears gather in my eyes and slowly roll down my face. I miss my mom very much and I feel it specially in this moment. I am grateful to my parents for the gift of love they had given to me.

" I miss her dad. I really do. "

"I know you do Princessa. I know. I miss her too. "

Dad slips the dress off it's hanger and hands it over to me.

" This dress was made by your Nona. "

" Really? " I am genuinely surprised over this piece of news. My grandmother sewed this dress.

" Ay Muchacha. She did. Your mom told me Nona said this dress is for a princess who would find her prince charming. "

" And Mom did find her prince charming. " I say and laugh.

" It's true. " Dad is nostalgic tonight. " I saw her in that dress and I knew what I wanted. I never regretted it Princessa. "

"Mom was the best. " I say. I wonder if this relic of a dress would help me find my Prince charming. Thinking about princes brings Daniel Winchester back to my mind. Just when I thought I found mine, he runs off like a thousand demons were after him.

" It's yours Culutiwa. " Dad hands me the parcel. I slowly unwrap the dress. The smell of age and must hung thickly on it but the stitches were seamless. The red linen still looked beautiful despite it's age. Tears form a lump in my throat. There are no words to thank my dad for this special gift of love. I put the dress aside and fling myself onto dad. He tightens his grip around me.

" Thank you, dad."

"Shush baby. " Dad silences my crying.

"Ann really wanted to watch you grow up. She wanted to be the one to guide you through this process, since she isn't here, I can only do my best. "

"I won't let you down dad. I won't let mom down either. "

"No, you won't baby. You would do great and go on to college. You would be fine my Culutiwa. " holding me in his arms, dad lets me cry against his chest.

"Ballplayer Chris, Math nerd Dylan, Horse riding Andre... " that's Stacey trying to figure out whom her date to the prom should be.

" You might want to take out Chris else Lizzie is gonna pluck out your eyes. " I reply sarcastically.

"What d' ya mean? " Stacey looks up from the list in her hand.

" They are dating. Haven't you heard? "

" Oh yeah, right. She has him now. He's off my list then"

" Good " my retort comes sharp.

"He isn't much of a good kisser anyways. Dude comes off in his pants before the game begins. " this girl can be something else.

" Stacey Amber Stephens!!! " I exclaim in shock.

" What? "

"Don't tell me you've been getting down like that. " I screw up my face in disgust.

" I ain't no Holy Mary Jane. It's for the fun Josie girl. We can't all be like you, believing in Forever After and babies and stuff. "

"Hey, don't go all judge on me. "

"I am not babes. I can't blame you for not knowing how to have fun. "

"What's my dad gonna say? "

"How's he gonna know? "

"Let off Stace. Dad expects loads from me. I can't let him down. "

"Right. " Stacey says and goes back to reading her list.

"Say Josie, who's gonna be your date? " it's not surprising that my friend can't last a minute of silence.

"I dunno. " Stacey's question reminds me how little of dating I have been doing.

"I haven't really thought of that. " I reply, and it's the truth.

" What!  How in heaven's name have I been so ignorant?  Don't tell me you are still strung up on Greek god Winchester? "

" I am not! " I reply shyly and throw a pillow at Stacey.

"I haven't seen the man since then. "

"Tried looking? "

" No. "

"Well if you wanna, you gotta find him. "

Stacey's last statement reminds me how very little I know of the guy I am beginning to develop a crush on. I do not even know his address, yet I keep thinking of the fire in his eyes the day he looked at me.

It's our last day at school before prom night. My mates are in high spirits. Personally, I am glad I finally get to leave High school. I am supposed to be in college next spring. My locker is stuck again and I try to jiggle the locks. Stacey has gone off in search of her perfect date.

"Oh crap! "My fingers are clearly useless outside the kitchen. It seems cooking is the only thing I am good at doing with my hands. I would be late for Geometry if I don't get out my textbook soon enough.

"Why are you cursing Miss. Geronimo? " That familiar baritone has my insides going cold and my mind doing flip flops at the same time. I look up to find him starring down at me. The very face I have begun to see in my dreams every night. The same face I have started fantasizing of lately. The same one that has grown so scarce.

" Hello Mr. Winchester. " How my voice comes out, sounding even is a surprise to me.

" I asked why you were cursing so early in the day. " He's doing the intense stare thing again. I am not seeing things this time. It's real.

" Uhm, my locker won't open. It's stuck again. "

"Here, let me give it a try. Give me the screwdriver. " He says as he places his bag on the floor and steps in front of the locker. I pass him the object in my hand. His fingers graze across my open palm on purpose. Sparks of liquid fire shoot up my spine. I realize my shivering was visible. He stares down at me, a smirk playing softly besides his lips. I go red in the face.

"So-so how have you been lately? " I ask for lack of what to say.

"Good. "

" Haven't been seeing much of you around. "

"Been busy. " His curt replies only confirms his unwillingness to speak to me. I fall silent.

" Right. " I say. He gives the lock one more tug and it comes undone.

"Wow, thanks. Where did you learn to do that? " I am truly surprised.

" Let's say, it came in handy most of my early years. " He smiled.

When he smiles, the ice seems to melt from his brown eyes, leaving him bare to my understanding. To the Navajo, being able to read the mind through the eyes is an important gift. I am blessed with it same as my mom was. The ice returns almost as soon as it left, shutting me out.

"Well you better hurry on to class. "

" Yeah, right. I should. Thank you, Mr. Winchester. " I say hurriedly and turn to leave.

" Say Josie... " Daniel calls me back.

"Sir? " I reply without turning this time.

"Uh, never mind. Go on to class. "

" Sure. Thanks again. " I say and walk to Geometry. I do not look back so I don't know if he's still by the locker or he's left. It strikes me: For once, I am not Miss. Geronimo.