Chapter 1

Mature content ahead marked by •••

____________________________

Naila's POV, 

"Saim can we talk about this?" I asked meekly as I walked towards him coming out of the bathroom, clinging to the front of my robe to cover myself, flustered and embarrassed.

"About what Baby?" He asked sweetly as he sat on the edge of the bed shirtless. 

"T....this. I mean....what we are d.... doing. It's.... it's not right. Why can't we wait?" I said pleadingly. 

His tall, sleek figure got up and walked towards me as his deep, beautiful grey eyes looked into mine lovingly. As always, I was lost into them. 

He stood so close to me that I could feel his body heat. It made my heart flutter.

He cupped my face with both his warm hands. Ah, I can stay like this for eternity with him but..... right now...it felt soo wrong and uncomfortable. 

"You know I love you right? You're soo beautiful that every guy wants to steal you from me and that upsets me. I want to make you mine and be with you forever so that everyone knows that you....belong....to me!" He said gazing in my eyes.

"I'm already yours Saim, I was and I always will be....but don't you think it's too soon? This step that we're taking.... it's haram. Let's wait till be can get married first and then we can do it. It will be Halal then." I said the 100th time. 

"Damn it Naila! Why are you playing soo hard to get?! It's soo Fucking annoying!" He yelled making me flinch. I gapped at him wide eyed.

"Oh ..ah...sorry baby. I.... I didn't mean to scare you..... it's just that...." He sighed as his voice got gentle again. 

"I'd been waiting for this day for a long time. And marriage..... it's soo long way ahead. We're still second years. We'll graduate, find a job, settle down and then I'll ask your hand in marriage.... it's soo long, I can't wait until then baby. And what if someone else comes and snatches you away from me? You're parents are soo strict. What if they get you married off to someone else? I don't want to lose the love of my life." He said soo honestly.

"That can never happen. I love you more than anything else and I'll only marry you. I'll even run away if it takes but I'll do anything to be with you." I said. 

"Then why are you hesitating?"

"I..."

"Naila...." He carrased my cheek making me weak and placed his lips on mine. It was soo good but ....still soo wrong. I backed off and turned away from him. 

"No.... I can't. I'm sorry Saim. This is just soo wrong. Allah won't forgive us!" I said on the verge of tears. 

"Fine then..... let's break up." 

I turned to him shocked. 

"What?"

"Yeah, I don't want to be with someone who doesn't even love me and breaks my heart." He looked away and tears blinded my vision.

"No Saim! I do love you!" I said desperately grabbing his arm. 

Then prove it! Prove your love to me and be mine tonight...." He said sternly. 

I had no choice. I loved him too much to lose him. I'd die without him. So I had to do it. "F....fine."

My hands were shaking as I grabbed the edge of the robe and slid it off my shoulders as it fell in my feet revealing my short silk nighty inside that he bought for me. It was soo short that it was hardly covering my hips and from the front to.... almost more than half of my breasts were showing. It was soo embarrassing that I couldn't even lift my face. I never thought in my wildest dreams that I had to wear something soo..... akward.

"Whoa....Naila!" His voice made me flinch as I came out of my thoughts.

"You are.....soo sexy." 

His voice....it was soo different....as if he was someone else. I dared to look up at him and his grey eyes looked more intense and..... petrifying. They hungrily roamed around my body and I felt soo naked and disgusting. 

It's my Saim... Why do I feel like this? Because of his gaze....but I love him! 

• ••

My heart was thumping inside and I just wanted to wear my old clothes and run away but I couldn't. Saim might hate me then and he'll leave me. 

He stepped closer and his hand moved from my neck, slipping down my breasts and down my hips feeling my curves. I shivered shutting my eyes tightly. It felt soo....dirty!

"You really have the perfect body Naila...." He chuckled staring at my breast. "Wow!"

He grabbed my chin a bit roughly with his hand and made me look up. I was shocked by his sudden move and my eyes widened as I looked at his face. He looked like some hungry predator. 

"And you're all mine.....all night." He grinned and slammed his open mouth on mine. He pulled me to him pressing his body on mine as his hand squeezed my hips. I moaned uncomfortably and he slipped his tongue in pushing it down my throat. 

It's not like we haven't kissed before. We have....many times in the 2 years we've been together. But not like this. I liked it for a while but then...it was just too suffocating. 

I squealed as he threw me on the bed. I steadily myself to turned to him as he started removing his jeans. I swallowed hard. I was soo scared.

I gasped to see his manhood which was erect now. It was too big. A shiver ran down my spine. 

"Oh Naila! You have no idea how long I've waited for this moment. Everytime when I looked at you....those lips, that body, and your milky skin....ugh God! You have no idea how many cold showers you've made me take. But now....it will all be worth it." He grinned getting on bed. 

'Cold showers? What does he mean?'

He got on his knees holding his member in front of me as I sat. 

"Let me feel your lips here baby."

I looked at him horrified.

"W....what... Saim.....you....what are you...."

"Come on!" 

He said and grabbing the back of my head, yanked at my hair as I screamed and pushed his manhood in my mouth choking me.

"Ah... God that feels soo good!" He moaned. 

But I felt like I was dying. It was soo big and disgusting being pushed down my throat soo forcefully. I thought I'd puke any moment now. Tears cascaded down my face. Why is he doing this to me? It hurts...it hurts my jaw....my throat....ya Allah! Help! 

But he didn't seem to care or even notice. He just kept thrusting it in. After a long while I felt some bitter liquid in my mouth and I fell on the bed choking and coughing it out. 

"Ah.... Naila that was amazing." He said blissfully. 

"S....Saim. p.... please stop. I...I'm s...scared." I sobbed. 

"Naila.... please don't cry baby. I'm sorry. I promise I'll be gentle from now on. Hey...." 

He hugged me gently from behind as I laid on the bed crying. He moved my hair and trailed gentle kisses on my shoulder and back. I closed my eyes....it felt soo good. He turned me to face him and kissed my forehead wiping my tears. 

"Don't cry please. I can't see your tears." 

And just like that, I forgot all my anger and fear. His eyes.....oh God....what is with them? So captivating!

He gently kissed my jawline and came down kissing and nibbling on my neck. I giggled. "That tickles!" 

"Really....what about now?" He was tickling me on my waist, stomach and thighs and I wriggled stuck in a laughing fit.

"Times please.....times please!" I squealed making a T with my hands.

He was laughing too. Ah, now he looks like my Saim. My handsome, sweet love of my life. I smiled at him and he leaned in and kissed me again.

It was slow at first but then it became more demanding. 

He got back for oxygen.

"Sorry Naila. I don't know what happened. I just couldn't resist. I hurted you right. Please forgive me. I promise.... I'll be gentle this time." He said so sincerely that I had to forgive.

I nodded and he smiled his shy smile making me melt. But I still didn't wanted to do it. 

"Saim... can't we just cuddle? I mean this sex.... it's too much." 

"That again! Seriously Naila. You really don't love me do you?!" He said irritated.

"I do.... I do..... I love you Saim!" 

"Make me believe." He said sternly gazing into my eyes. I finally gave up. 

"Fine.... I won't hesitate anymore." I said sighing sadly. 

"That's my girl." He said and slipped the belts off my nighty down revealing my breasts. I swallowed shivering. He suddenly grabbed them and I gasped. 

"Wow... they're soo soft." I yelped as he was squeezing them. 

He slipped the nighty off completely and now I was completely naked beneath him and he on top of me. He licked his lips making me shiver. 

His mouth attacked my breasts and I moaned....more in pain then in pleasure. He pinned both my wrists beside my head trapping me completely. I couldn't think straight. 

I yelped as his 2 fingers entered inside me like a scissor. 

"S....Saim..." I cried in pain.

"It hurts.... please...."

"I'm loosening you so it won't hurt much during our sex." He said between sucking my nipples. He stopped to pick some kind of packet.

"What is that?" I asked.

"Condom. Haven't you seen 1 before?" 

I shook my head. Actually, I didn't knew anything about this all until last month when he started urging we do it. I researched a bit and it gave me creeps to even look at such stuff Astaghfirullah! 

But I thought if it's Saim, it will be ok. 

"Now you're ready." He said and abruptly slammed it in inside me. I screamed and my back arched. It hurted so much like my insides were tearing apart. 

"Oh....so good Naila...you.... are soo tight!" He groaned. 

Without even letting me adjust he started thrusting. Slowly first but then he picked pace. 

"It hurts.... please....." I cried.

"It's ok....the pain will be gone soon...."

But it never went. For the entire hour I felt soo much pain. He was squeezing and biting at my breast, and thrusting soo hard. I shut my eyes.... I couldn't take it. 

"Ah ....it hurts.....s....ah....."

He suddenly pulled out and I took a breath of relief for a second but he immediately turned me over on my stomach and thrusting from behind. I screamed as I felt him in deeper. He was moaning too. He grabbed my breasts pinching my nipples.... I cried and moaned....but he didn't stop. 

Abruptly he picked me up by my waist and made me stand on my hands and knees. 

"I.... I can't.... Saim...."

"Come on baby.... it's fun." He said and was thrusting hard. My knees were losing strength and I fisted the sides of the pillow. My tears fell soaking it. I sank my forehead down praying for it to be over soon.

He yelled my name and stiffened falling on me with his entire weight after that making me fall too and he pulled out from inside me. I took a breath of relief and the pain was gone but not completely stopped. My vagina was throbbing.

He laid beside me looking content. Without even asking if I was ok. I wiped my tears and muffled my cries.

I didn't know when sleep took over me then.

• ••

This is how at the age of 18 I lost my virginity to the boy I loved the most and who I thought loves me the same.....but I was soo wrong.

###

I felt a weight on my back. When I opened my eyes, I saw Saim peacefully sleeping and I was on his chest with his arm around me. I blushed as I remembered about last night. It was broad daylight outside by now. I lifted my head a bit to admire his Beauty. His heavy eyelashes, thick eyebrows and his bronze skin. Ah! Those lips and that perfectly bridged nose....who wouldn't fall for them?

Saim Sheikh. The hottest guy in college as people say. All the girls fawn over him and drool at his site. The tall, grey eyed, six pack abs guy who can easily be mistaken for a model. He was my boyfriend since 12th grade. It was our 3rd year anniversary today. I wanted to gift him something special and this is what he asked for. I denied 100 of times because it's haram right? but he wouldn't listen. His friends and some of my friends had done it too with thier lovers, why can't we? 

So we came here to this hotel. I lied to my parents that I have a project due so I'll be sleeping at my bestfriend Arshia's place and they reluctantly agreed. My parents are very strict as I come from a conservative Muslim family. If they even find out I'm dating someone, they'd kill me. But I love Saim and thats what matters to me and now I couldn't believe we were finally one! No one can pull us apart!!!

I lifted his arm from my body sitting up but I winced as the pain shot between my legs. I looked down and my eyes widened to see blood.

'Calm down Naila! It's normal to bleed when a girl loses his virginity.' I reminded myself. 

I covered myself with the sheets and limped my way to the bathroom. I saw in the mirror and gasped to see what they call hickeys and marks on my breasts and stomach. I shook my head and turned on the shower.

I came out after the ghusal(bath) and Saim had just woken up. Aww, he looked soo cute in his groggy state. 

"Goodmorning sleepyhead." I said.

He smiled at me. "Goodmorning baby. Come here."

I went to him and he kissed me. I blushed getting back.

"You woke up before me?"

"Yep, because I'm not lazy like you." I said sticking my tongue out. 

He smirked moving his fingers through his hair and making my heart skip. I walked away from him to the mirror concentrating on wiping my wet hair.

"Did you enjoy last night?" 

My smile disappeared. All I remember is pain. What enjoyment do girls get by that? "Um....yes." I lied. 

He came behind me and hugged me digging his face in my neck.

"Me too Baby. You were amazing. My Naila is the hottest and the most amazing girl in the world."

I turned crimson at his words. 

"We look like a newly married couple, don't we?" I said shyly.

I noticed him rolling his eyes from the mirror. I frowned but ignored it.

"Ofcourse." He said and pecked my cheek.

He went to wash up and we spent the entire day together as our anniversary date. I was so happy, but I didn't knew my happiness could be soo short lived.