Chapter 12

"Okay, the pastry display is fully restocked for the afternoon, so are you good if I leave?"

"Yeah, go," Kiki says while measuring out coffee beans. "Beck will be here soon, anyway."

"Alright," I sigh and head to the break room, taking off my apron. With plans to see Abby in just a few minutes, I gather my things and go through the back door to my car. I take out my claw clip and let my hair fall over my shoulders, and I tweak it in the visor mirror before starting my car and turning out of the café lot. I go right instead of left because Abby's house is the opposite way to mine, and she told me to meet her there after work. She didn't say I would be going on another wild ride through the mountains, so I assume we'll just hang out there, and I can ask her more questions about werewolves.

When I get to her house, I notice her mom's car isn't there. I park along the street and walk up the driveway, quickly sniffing my shirt to make sure I don't smell too much like expresso and pumpkin flavoring. I don't think I do, but then again, my senses may have become immune to all Blue Moon Café smells.

I knock on the door and step back with my hands holding one another against my front. I consider telling Abby about my kiss with Harvey last night, but Abby's boyfriend answers the door — who I've only met once — so I smile a bit awkwardly and say, "Oh, hi, is Abby here?"

"She's upstairs." He opens the door wider. "But she's—"

"I'm right here!" I hear her call, and suddenly she's wedging herself beside him. "I was making us coffee and accidentally splashed my shirt. Come in — it's cold."

Abby nearly walks me through the door.

"I just realized I didn't tell you Liam was going to be here," she says sheepishly. "But, you know, since you always have questions about us and the pack and shifting, we could tell you about mates."

"Mates?" I question, stepping out of my shoes.

Liam says, "I'll grab the coffee."

He disappears into the kitchen as Abby takes me to the living room. There's a pleasant, woodsy smell, and I notice a candle burning on the side table beside the couch. I sit next to it, and Abby places herself on the adjacent loveseat.

I take off my jacket and place it next to me. "So, what are mates?"

"You're gonna love this," she predicts and places a pillow on her lap.

Liam comes in with three coffee mugs gathered in his two hands, and Abby reaches to help him. She takes two and gives one to me. "You like almond milk, right? That's all I put in."

"Yeah, that's what I usually drink," I say and have a sip. "It's good."

"Good." She cups her mug in her lap and takes a breath. "So. Mates. Soulmates."

"Soulmates?" I question.

"That's what they are — soulmates — but we just say mates." She glances at Liam. "It's a special bond between two werewolves that we traditionally believe is bestowed by the Moon Goddess."

"Oh, wow. So you guys are..."

"We are," Liam confirms.

I ask, "Since when? Since always?"

"No. You can only find your mate once you turn eighteen, so — because Liam is older than me — when I turned eighteen, we found out we're mates."

"How did you know?"

"It's a physical feeling. We both feel our mate bond."

"Do you decide who your mate is?"

Liam smiles. "No. We have no influence over it, which is why our ancestors believed the Moon Goddess chooses who is mated with whom. We believe it's like fate."

"Oh," my voice brightens. "That's sweet. Is it...forever?"

Abby laughs a little. "Yeah. And I know that seems kind of weird, like we don't have a say in this, but we see mates as a really positive, joyful thing. Liam and I are really happy to be mated. Lots of us who are under eighteen can't wait to turn of age and find our mates."

I sip my coffee and then set it on the coffee table in front of us. "So is it like being married? But with no divorce?"

"Well—"

Liam gives her a look — almost like a warning.

"What is it?" I ask, worried I'm going to be blocked by another secret.

"There is a sort of divorce option. It's called rejection." Abby peers at her boyfriend again but with a sense of sadness. "It's very serious and final and heartbreaking if the couple doesn't mutually decide to reject each other. You don't hear about it often."

"Has it happened in your pack before?"

"Once or twice," Liam says.

"How do you reject your mate?"

Abby's lips tighten as though she doesn't want to tell me. "You — well, you say it. You say 'I — along with your name — reject you, their name, and then the bond supposedly breaks."

"Just like that?"

"My mother said it's like casting a spell. When we say it, it's in Kanien'kéha, but yeah, that's all it takes."

"Oh," I murmur and stretch to grab my mug, unsure of what to say.

"But like Liam said, it's only happened once, maybe twice, and hasn't for a long time. There isn't anyone in our pack now who's rejected their mate or been rejected," she adds.

Harvey comes to mind. I ask, "Do all werewolves have mates?"

Abby says, "Yes."

One word, and suddenly my chest aches. Harvey has a soulmate, then? I stare into my mug as a torrent of unspeakable questions invades my thoughts. He's already twenty-four, so has he found his soulmate? Even if he hasn't, he will.

So why has he been so suggestive? Why did he kiss me back?

"Anyway..." Abby leans over the loveseat's armrest, closer to me. "What you would think if you were mated to someone? Would you be like, angry? Confused?"

"I don't know," I say, sinking into the couch. I want to say that it doesn't matter — I'm not one of them, and there's no point in pretending I am, but I don't want to sound bothered.

"Really? I mean, I guess it would be a lot to take in, right?"

I point my chin away from her. "Yeah."

I hear the front door open off the hallway, and they're instantly distracted. Liam gets up from the small couch and calls, "Hello?"

"It's us." Suddenly two boys rush into the living room, but they freeze at the sight of me, bumping into each other. "Oh— sorry."

"What is it?" Abby asks them.

"We were just looking for Liam," the closer says.

Liam — still standing — walks back to Abby. "Mia, this is Cory and Delsin. They're a part of the pack."

Delsin? The name sounds familiar.

Cory, the closer, asks, "She knows?"

"So does Harvey, so shut your mouth about it, okay?" Abby demands.

"I'll go with them, see what's up," Liam tells her. "It was nice to talk with you, Mia. I'm sure I'll see you again soon."

"Yeah, I'm sure." I force a smile.

He bends, kisses Abby on the cheek, and then corrals the two boys out of the living room. Abby watches until the front door opens and closes and the house is quiet again. "That happens way too often," she mutters.

"Why do they need him?"

"I dunno. They're both newly-shifted and overly ambitious, and they come seeking Liam's expertise. Their brothers and also Liam's cousins."

"Are a lot of the pack members related?"

"Some."

"How does that work mate-wise? Are there enough people so everyone has a mate?"

"Not everyone's mate is in the pack. Most belong to other packs or just live elsewhere. Because mates are fated, as we believe, the couples seem to find their way to each other."

"Has Harvey found his mate?"

Abby's annoyance with the boys' intrusion fades quickly. "He...has."

My ache worsens tenfold. "Is she in your pack?"

"No, but she lives in Black Lake. She's different — not like us. He doesn't want me talking about this specifically because—"

"It's fine," I interrupt and try to breathe my disappointment away, but the backs of my eyes start to burn. "I-I think you've answered all my questions."

"I have?"

"Yeah, and my stomach kinda hurts, so I think I'm going to go and lie down."

"Does it actually? You're not finding a way out like you did with your mom and the festival, are you?"

I blink hard. "It really does."

"Because of what we talked about?"

I look at her. "Harvey and I kissed."

Her expression drops. "What? When?"

"I get what you're trying to tell me."

"You do?"

I nod and rise from the couch. "I think I need some time alone."

She stands also. "Oh, okay, if you think that's for the best, take all the time you need. It can be a lot to adjust to."

I grab my jacket and Abby walks me to the door. Before she lets me out, she suggests, "I know you want to be alone, but maybe you should go and see Harvey. He's at Norwood House."

I swallow. "Yeah. Maybe."

She opens the door and squeezes my shoulder. "Everything is gonna work out, you'll see. Mates are a good thing."

"Yeah. Right. I'll talk to you later."

"If anything happens just text or call me or come here. I-I'll be here, okay?"

"Okay. Bye."

I walk down the porch steps and along the driveway to my car. Abby waits at the front door as I get in my car and pull my seatbelt on. I wave again and drive down the street just to get out of view, and then I pull off to the side and park again because there are people at home and I don't want my family to see how upset I am; my eyes are already watering.

I push myself back into my seat with my hands still on the wheel. Harvey has a mate, she lives here, and that's a good thing? How can Abby say that after I admitted we kissed?

She's warned me to stay away from Harvey. Is this why? Could she tell I liked him while she knew he was promised to someone else?

Why did he kiss me back? That jerk!

I jam my gearshift into drive. Maybe I should go talk to him and tell him exactly that.

And then it hits me; Delsin is the guy Harper went on a date with, and Black Lake is too small to have more than one Delsin. Besides, he looks like a senior, and she never said he goes to Black Lake High.

My anger builds. Delsin knows he's promised to someone else, but he's using my sister in the meantime. God, what is wrong with these werewolves?

I head towards Norwood House, fueled by my annoyance with plans to tell Harvey exactly what I'm thinking.