Chapter 1 ~ Continuations

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Instead of answering her, I cried harder, then Lisa worriedly asked, “Was it something I said?” She looked from dad to mom and then back to me, about to tear up, “I am sorry, I didn’t.”

When I saw the single tear in her eyes, I hurried to her side and called her into my arms, I hugged her tightly “Oh Lisa,” I said between tears,, “it is not something you did, I am so, so sorry.”

“What? I don’t understand. Why are you apologizing? You did nothing wrong.” She said, confused.

“No, I did everything wrong.” I sob as I hold her face up; I can’t let them be driven to an edge this early. “Can you ever forgive me?” I asked in tears.

Lisa took my hand from her face, she teared up as well, and Lora followed, “Of course, big sis.” She sniffled and added, “I forgive whatever you think you did wrong.” She smiled, and it was the best.

“Thank you,” I said and stood, and patted both her and Lora’s heads.

“Mary.” Father, who had been quiet, called me.

“Yes, papa?” I answered as I dried my tears.

“I don’t know what happened or what you think you did wrong, but everything will be okay; alright?”

“Of course, papa,” I said as I returned to my seat. I knew what I had to do. My mind was made up, and they are not turning back now. I looked up at my father, who was observing me, perhaps waiting for me to say something. Determined, I handed over the envelope back to him. “I can’t accept this, sorry, papa.”

While dad remained quiet, mom attacked me with questions, “What are you doing, Mary? This is your tuition f*e and nothing else.”

“Why?” Father calmly asked me.

I sighed and asked, "Papa, is this money for tuition?"

“Yes.” Dad replies, “two years of it, to be precise.” He added as he ate.

“Lisa and Lora’s fees will only take half of this money, right?” I asked again.

“What are you trying to say, Mary? Speak in a language I will understand.” He said as he looked at me with questions and confusion in their eyes. All of them stared.

“Yes, sorry.” I paused then continued, “I think it’s best if the money is used for their tuition and probably take care of a few things in the house, God knows there are many things to take care of.”

“Are you even listening to yourself, Mary? For years you have been dreaming of college, even if you didn’t say it out, we figured it out with the longing you had on your face whenever those college students pass by the farm.” Mother was clearly angry. She continued, “We had to sell a lot of things, work a lot of shifts just for you to go to college, and now that the dream is within your reach, you are giving it to your siblings? What is wrong with you?”

“But mom…”

“Don’t you mom me, you’re our first child, Mary, and you must be educated, whether you like it or not. Your sisters are still young; they can continue their education some other time, but not you.”

I watched my sisters from the corner of my eyes, their heads were bent down, and they trembled, no doubt crying from mother’s harsh words. I closed my eyes as I prayed to a higher power for confidence and strength because I will need it to persuade my stubborn mother, “No mother, that’s not fair.”

“What?” She was shocked, did I just challenge her? Papa remained silent and just watched.

Yes. In my family, things like breaking the house rules, which are a lot, by the way; challenging and throwing words at your parents or elders, whether they are in the wrong or not, are never permitted. Devoted Christians, did I mention?

But It was about my sisters, if I don’t stand up for them now, when will I ever? “Sorry if I sounded kind of rude but I don’t think this is the right way to go about it.”

“And what do you know about the right way, Mary? You are just eighteen. Are you going to teach your parents how to do the right thing?” she asked glaringly.

“That’s not what I meant, mother.” Annoyed now.

“Oh really? What did you mean then? Please do tell.” She added blankly.

“Being the first child doesn’t mean I have to be the only educated one in the family,” I declared, glancing from Dad to Mom, who were watching me silently. I took a deep breath and continued, “I can always go to college or university. Sure, it won’t be a walk in the park, but I’m your child. I’m smart, confident, brave, and hardworking. I can do whatever I set my mind to—work or school. Not going now won’t stop me in the future. But what about Lisa and Lora?” I pointed at my younger sisters, who were now looking at me with hopeful eyes, and I drew strength from their gaze.

“Mom, society is moving forward every day. In five years, Lisa will be sixteen and Lora fifteen. Are they supposed to go back to grade 1? Of course not. It’d be a nightmare for them. The stares from little kids, and they can’t even get into college without first finishing grade school.”

Should I end it here? I thought. ‘Nope. since I’ve got the chance to speak up, I need to lay it all out.’ I murmured to myself, gathering my resolve.

But then Lora spoke up, beating me to the punch. “Big sister, I’m sure that’s not what Papa and Mama meant. I mean, we can always go to school again, right?” she asked, turning hopefully to Mom.

I answered before Mom could, “And how are you so sure about that, Lora? If you haven’t noticed, things aren’t exactly smooth sailing for us. If we let this opportunity slip by, do you really think you and Lisa will ever get to go to school? What if the job you want in the future requires a solid education? What will you do then?”

Lora slumped in her chair. “Oh, I didn’t think of it that way.”

“Yes, and that’s why you need me, Papa, and Mama to think ahead for you,” I said. “I can still go to school, even at twenty-eight, or thirty. Married women go to college and university. But starting over from grade school? That’s another story. Mama, think about it—five years from now, I’ll be twenty-three. I can handle the pressure and tackle whatever the world throws at me. I’m a Johnson, after all. We’re taught to be strong, bold, and resilient. So, sure, I can always go to school later, but Lisa and Lora? When their enthusiasm for learning starts to wane and they lose interest, what then? Because whether we like it or not, it will happen.” I locked eyes with Mom, waiting for her comeback to that.

But with the look in her eyes, I doubt she would have anything to say—I hope so.