Three

I couldn't sleep because of what Zach said to me. Was he just trying to give me a hard time by asking for such a favor? Hella! I'm the one doing him a favor, yet he expects me to give him a favor in return? What's his reason for asking that favor? He's a damn playboy! Damn him, I want to crush his face.

Be my wife, his face flashed in my mind. He should end up with Grace, and I'll work with that once I'm in the Philippines.

After the celebration, my cousins, along with my mom and dad, stayed at our house. My three aunts went back to the hotel where they were staying with their husbands. As for Zach? I don't know, he went back to wherever he lives. He's rich enough to have a place to stay here in California. He didn't talk to me anymore after I punched him in the stomach because of what he said. What does he think of me? Becoming his wife out of all people? Is he insane?

I shook my head, trying to remove that jerk from my mind.

I sat up from lying down. I wanted to go back to the Philippines with my parents, but lola wouldn't allow it. Haze and Shanna were going back to Korea since that's where they live, but from what I overheard from my aunts' conversation, they were also planning to return to the Philippines. Mika was also going back to the Philippines tomorrow, accompanying my parents. It's not fair! I want to go home even just for a year. I'm only asking for a year. I pouted and crossed my arms.

What if I accept his offer? No! I don't want to. But maybe, if she's still single, I could make a plan involving the two of them. It's her long-time dream, right? I suddenly felt sad. Doesn't Cairen like Evan? But Evan likes Grace? And Grace likes Zach, while Zach likes Cheska. The situation is so confusing. Are Zach and Cheska still together? Why would he ask me that if they are? Or is he just making fun of me like what he did to Cairen back then? I'll ask him. What if Evan and Grace are in a relationship? I don't know, but maybe it's possible. I need to find out to confirm.

I looked at the picture on the nightstand to my right. There was a picture of her, but not a single photo of me in her room. I am living her life as lola wanted. If Cairen asks to go home, I'm sure Grandma would agree. But not with me. I never questioned why, but it's the question I desperately want to know the truth about.

I took a deep breath and wiped away the tears running down my face. It feels like I exist when Cairen is not here, and I am in a place I never questioned why. Living with nanny Mima, who has become like a mother to me. And I never questioned it, as if I'm okay with what they are doing in my life, but I'm not. I was never okay.

I took another deep breath.

Do I have another option? Finally, I will plead with Grandma. I wiped away the tears on my face. I'll do it tomorrow, she's probably asleep by now. I

****

However, Grandma's reply crushed my optimism. "You aren't going," she said firmly. My jaw dropped and I was stunned, trying to process her words.

My eyes warmed with the urge to cry, hoping that Grandma might change her mind. I was in her room now, and she was seated on the edge of her bed, still dressed in her nightgown.

"Please, Grandma?" I pleaded, pressing my palms together in a desperate gesture. "It's only for a year. I want to visit my parents' hometown and be with them for a while." I implored her to understand.

"Yes!" I cried out in excitement when my grandmother agreed. Her response came as a shock to me, but I was overjoyed nonetheless.

Tears welled up in my eyes, but Grandma's words brought me back to reality and I composed myself, sitting back down on the bed's edge.

"However, there is one condition," she added. "You must marry Zach."

I was confused. "Excuse me, Grandma?" I asked softly, not quite sure if I had heard her correctly.

"You must marry Zach, my dear," she repeated with a serious expression. "Only then will I give my blessing."

The news hit me like a ton of bricks. My body went limp and I slouched forward, feeling like my world was falling apart. Why did I have to marry Zach? What was the purpose behind this union?

 

"Why?" I asked, struggling to understand. "Why am I being forced to marry someone I don't even like? Grandma, is this some kind of tradition?" I searched her eyes for an answer, hoping to find some clarity.

"I have no choice," she replied, her voice trembling. Grandma had never addressed me by my given name, but always called me Cairen or Sweetie. "Zach was here yesterday to announce your engagement, and your parents have been aware of this from the start."

"Is Zach aware of all this?" I asked, feeling left in the dark.

Why wasn't I informed of this? I wondered. Did they keep this from me? Why? Does Cairen know about this? The questions kept flooding my mind.

"Yes, Zach was here to formalize things," she answered, her hands comforting me. "But I changed my mind. I don't want you to find yourself in an uncomfortable situation."

"I'm disappointed that I wasn't told about this," I said. "Did Cairen know?"

Grandma sighed and her smile faded. "Cairen is aware of everything," she admitted. "I know you're eager to see your family. To be completely honest, your father's obligation to me is being paid for by their child. They thought you had died at birth, and only Cairen survived."

 

"When I found out that you were alive, I searched for you tirelessly. You were only two years old when I finally found you and brought you here," Grandma's voice was raspy as she spoke. "I never told your parents about you because I believed it would be better that way." This was news to me; Grandma had never mentioned it before.

The feeling of not belonging always haunted me. I was the half that did not exist. I wondered if my father's debt to Grandma was substantial enough for Cairen to pay it off. I tried to keep my emotions in check, wanting to appear strong in front of Grandma.

"Your grandfather’s debt to Zach's grandfather was substantial," Grandma explained with a sigh, avoiding eye contact. "Alexander, is a close friend of the Verdan family, and he paid off your grandfather's debt and paying it hrough the marriage. I had no choice but to agree, as your father owed us his child. It was the best way to avoid losing everything."

"You have no choice, my dear. You must marry Zach," Grandma said, her words trapping me. I felt like I had no say in the matter. Cairen should have been the one in this situation, but now it was me.

The thought of marrying the person I despised, while Grace adored them, was insane.

"I understand how difficult this must be for you, honey," Grandma said with a comforting smile. "If you don't want to go through with it, I may have to give up everything."

I shook my head, knowing that if this marriage went through, the Verdan family's reputation would be forever tarnished. "I can't let that happen, Grandma. Our family's fall from grace would be inevitable if this marriage takes place. Although I didn't have a choice, I must find a way to prevent it from happening."

Despite my desire to escape and hide from the world, I knew that this marriage was the only way I could be with my parents. I needed to find a solution to ensure that this union never took place. Was there no way out?

 And also I must fulfill the promise I had with Cairen.

"I'm sorry, dear," Grandma replied, her voice filled with regret.

"Does Zach know I'm not Cairen?" I asked, struggling to keep my emotions in check.

"No, and no one must suspect that you're not Cairen. You resemble her so much," Grandma said, brushing her hand against my cheek. "You need to be cautious and make sure no one discovers your true identity. Alexander will not forgive us for this deception, and neither will our family."

The weight of the responsibility was overwhelming. Everyone was expecting and eager for Cairen's arrival. What if I had never been taken away as a baby? What if I was still alive and not believed to be dead by my parents?

I didn't want to be in this position, pretending to be someone I'm not, but I had no other choice.

"I'll do it for Cairen and you, Grandma," I forced a smile, despite the pain in my heart. "When is the wedding?"

I silently hoped it wasn't soon.

"The wedding is scheduled for next year," Grandma explained. "I'll let Alexander know. You've done so much, just as Cairen would have in this situation. This is my debt to both of you."

"You owe me nothing, Grandma, to you or Cairen, or to the family," I lied, pretending to understand.

Deep down, I was furious, but I was skilled at hiding my emotions. It was what made me who I was.

Grandma hugged me tightly. "You're free to leave whenever you wish."